Erased

Erased
By Severely Snaped
Severely_Snaped@yahoo.com

Disclaimer: I own nothing from the Potterverse. The only thing I can claim as mine is the plot and I\'m sure even THAT has already been done a zillion times in some form/fashion. All flowers and backstage passes may be directed to the fabulous Miss J.K. Rowling, who is probably reading this and trying very hard not to hurl.

Erased

Chapter One: No Recollection

His right leg moved slowly before settling back into one position. The feeling of sore, stiff muscles jarred him from his deep and lengthy slumber, and the light smell of disinfectant could be made out almost barely. Groaning slightly, he slowly opened his eyes and noticed immediately how dim the room was. There were no other sounds except the gentle exhale of his breath and the soft ticking from a tall grandwizard clock in the far end of the room. He closed his eyes. The sound emanating from the clock was soothing and he fought against his body\'s impulse to go back to sleep.

He forced himself not to give into the urge, opening his eyes once again and trying his best to remain alert. He knew where he was; as to how he had gotten there, he didn\'t have the faintest idea. There weren\'t any students occupying any of the neighboring beds, to his relief, and the soft light coming from the crack in the office door suggested that either Poppy was going over some notes or had stepped out of the infirmiry for a brief moment. Either way, he was glad to be alone now that he had awoken. He slowly raised a shaky hand to his face, feeling the thick blanket of tiny, rough spikes that had covered his chin and cheeks, and he made the silent conclusion that he had been out of consciousness for some time.

Rubbing his eyes slightly, he let them adjuo tho the low lighting. One could never tell the time of day due to the lighting spells in the infirmiry. You could easily as guess day as night, it was all pretty much the same. His vision was in perfect working order and aside from the constant, dull ache in his muscles or with the rise and fall of his chest, there was no pain. The pleasant, light-headedness he felt when he lifted his head indicated that he had been given some type of pain medication. For the first time since he had been a student within these walls, he felt grateful towards whoever or whatever had looked out for him. Whether it be God or Poppy or Albus or...

\"Severus...?\"

His dark eyes zeroed in on the soft voice before his head did, and after a moment he slowly turned in the direction of the speaker moving towards him. It was not, to his surprise, Madame Pomfrey. He could see her slim outline just barely at first. She was turned away from what little light the room had to offer, so it was a second or so until he could make out her features.

She was of medium height, wearing black pants and a light pastel shirt that actually had a decent, tailored cut to it. Her sleeves had been rolled up, exposing her pale skin, as if she had been working on a task previously. There was a simple, silver chain around her slender neck, and she had long hair that fell a good six inches beneath her shoulders, ending in a mass of curls.

She was a young girl, perhaps around twenty or so in age, who looked as if she hadn\'t seen much sleep in the last few days. She was very pretty, he noted with a subtle glance at her lengthy lashes over warm, brown eyes. But he didn\'t give any more thought to it; he was mostly surprised that he didn\'t hear her enter the room. She was probably another one of Poppy\'s hired nighttime recruits, although she wasn\'t wearing the uniform smock that most of them all typically wore. They were always of university age, these new hire-ons, and they rarely lasted a year---if even that long. He scowled at the intrusion as well as the fact that she hadn\'t addressed him properly.

He barely had time to register any of these thoughts when he noticed she was suddenly right by the bed, perching herself on the edge, leaning over and wrapping both arms around him gently. He tensed up as she buried her face in his neck and he suddenly felt stripped bare and invaded. His already sore stomach tightened uncomfortably and he was extremely irritated.

He tried to move away but the ache in his lower back protested, leaving him only with his own arms as any form of defense. His hands grasped her shoulders and he started to push her off of him carefully when a noise coming from the girl made him stop. She was shaking, and the cool, wet tingles he could feel running down the side of his neck made him realize that she was crying. The girl was actually crying.

The whole situation was absurd. Surely, the girl was delusional if she had the nerve to be shedding tears over him. That was the trouble with a lot of these new, young interns. They would become attached to their patients---as if they knew them personally---or would do a good job pretending to care. And the few times that they did strike up a friendship would always lead to them seeking out their newfound company from time to time for a quick chat or game of chess, when they were supposed to be doing their job.

The girl wouldn\'t be hugging him, for damn sure, if she had been a student here. She would have went out of her way to avoid the hospital wing altogether while he was in residence, and she most certainly wouldn\'t be snivelling all over him right now if she had any idea as to whom she was whining over.

Just wait until she gets to know me, he thought bitterly. Then she\'ll be crying for a whole slew of different reasons.

But apart from the occasional sniff and the soft droplets coming from her eyes, she didn\'t sob and she didn\'t become hysterical. He was relieved even more when she sat back up a bit to look at him, because it meant she was no longer attached to his person. However, her hands remained, finding their way to his own and squeezing lightly, making him a tad bit nervous. He was about to tell her to stop acting so childish and to go fetch Poppy or Albus when the girl spoke up before he did.

\"Oh, Severus. You have no idea of how happy I am to see you awake.\"

It was barely a whisper, and the pained expression in her eyes told him that she was genuinely concerned. A bit mental perhaps, but sincere nonetheless. She sat up straight and took a deep breath, brushing the wet trails on her cheeks aside with one hand before reclaiming his again with her own. When she spoke again, she sounded a bit more composed.

\"We almost lost you last week,\" she explained softly, steeling herself from the raw emotions that were trying to resurface.

He could tell that if she hadn\'t been willing herself to stay focused, that she actually would have been the sobbing, hysterical person he was afraid he would have had to endure moments before. Her hands were now gripping his a little more tighter, and what was supposed to be the soft, comforting rub of her thumbs over the back of his hands were only making him even more nervous. Especially now that he knew how close he had been to dying.

The thoughts inside his head from the previous ten minutes had now tripled and he allowed himself a moment to get lost in thought before turning his attentions back to the strange girl at his bedside. There wasn\'t the slightest hint of fear or caution in her eyes and he found it to be rather odd. He only nodded his head briefly when she asked if if he felt alright, and the way her eyes lit up when he did made another alarm sound off in his head. It didn\'t help matters that she leaned over to hug him again, a little bit more firmly than last time; one hand running up and down the bicep on his left arm, making his adrenaline level jump almost as much as he did from the contact. It seemed strange that she would be doing that again and he was able to abruptly push her back this time.

\"Please don\'t,\" he stated awkwardly in a rough voice, unsure as to how he should go about saying as much. He didn\'t want to hurt her feelings, but he wanted to let her know that she was overstepping her bounds with him. She sat up again rather quickly and eyed him apologetically.

\"I\'m sorry, Severus! I wasn\'t thinking,\" she said in a self-chiding tone.

He paused to regard her words for a second, biting back his own impulse to snap at her. It still unnerved him that she was using his given name. She was probably used to Albus and Poppy calling him that when talking about his condition. He would eventually have to set the girl straight.

\"I keep forgetting that you\'re probably still very sore,\" she finished.

\"Yes, very.\" he emphasized, but not with too much malice. If only he could find a way to get rid of her, then that would take care of one problem. He desperately wanted to speak with Albus and find out all of the details that he didn\'t know at present. Better to kill two birds with one stone, he figured, if he sent the girl to inform the Headmaster that he was awake. At least it would keep her away from his immediate vacinity.

\"Poppy\'s asleep now, was was in here most of the night. She said your vitals were improving with each passing day. I can go get her if you need to speak with her.\"

He cleared his rusty throat a good bit before speaking again. \"No, that won\'t be necessary. If you don\'t mind, I really need to speak with...\"

\"Yes, of course.\" she cut him off, much to his annoyance. \"I promised to inform Albus the minute you woke up. However, he went to visit with Marcus Flint\'s family again and should be returning sometime this afternoon.\" The girls\' eyes fell as she said the last part, nervously looking away.

Ah yes, the boy. No, he told himself, \'young man.\' Marcus Flint had died while trying break through the small barricade of Death Eaters who were trying to protect Voldemort. Severus had been there, and it was one of the few things that he did recall.

The fight that had broke out that night wasn\'t large, nor was it planned. It happened very fast, and just about everyone who participated was dead. There were maybe ten Death Eaters or so, and a small handful of Aurors and Order members who happened to be there. Marcus Flint had been trying to pull off at least one strong hex in the hopes of killing Voldemort once and for all. The Dark Lord had been so weak in those final moments that it was pointless to waste the energy that one would require for the Aveda Kedavra curse. A flick of the wand could have easily brought him down.

However, it was Gregory Goyle who stopped Marcus right as the words left his mouth. It didn\'t even take magic to kill him, sadly. The elder Goyle had acquired an iron rod at some point; one end broken off and sharp with jagged edges. The young man didn\'t even see the flash of it cutting across the space between them as he had been so focused in saying the small incantation that triggered off the hexing spell.

The rod went straight through the boy\'s neck and the strange gurgling sound of air escaping through the gashes was all that was ever heard from him. He couldn\'t even cry out in agony. Goyle twisted the rod around a good bit, doubling whatever damage it made going in and making sure that the boy would have wounds icalical enough that even magic coult het heal. Another sharp twist and push from the Death Eaters\' hand, and tip of the rod came out of the other side of Marcus\' neck, causing him to drop almost immediately.

Severus wanted to rush over to the boy, but he knew in his heart that there would be nothing he could have done for him other than to hold his hand and tell him to let go of whatever life he was clinging to. But he would never have the small solace of that action as he was engaged in a duel of his own. The tar-like potion they had forced him to drink early on in the evening was taking its toll on him and he was fighting to remain standing. It angered him even more that Flint hadn\'t cast some type of shielding spell before running into combat. He inwardly shook his head while dodging the white flash that whizzed past him. It could all have been so easily avoided.

The annoying Potter brat had shown up briefly with Percy Weasley. They had managed to bring down one of the more powerful Death Eaters that stood to protect the Dark Lord, but when Weasley was hit with the Cruciatus, Potter made a wise move and took the older, red-headed boy to safety. After a while it was only down to about four men. One was a man who worked for Arthur at the Ministry, who\'s face Severus could recognize but he could never remember the name. That left the man with whom Severus was dueling and oddly enough, Peter Pettigrew---who had somehow managed not to get hit with anything serious throughout the whole ordeal until the man from the Ministry finally killed him, and rather quickly.

Severus wasn\'t too far behind in finishing his own opponent off, if just barely. They were both very tired at that point, but Severus had the upper hand in the form of quick reflexes. The man obviously had not been expecting for him to pull off two strong spells in a row. Severus, himself, was surprised that he had managed that last one, as well. They both collapsed, one in death, and the other not far from it. Severus heard the man from the Ministry rush to him.

\"Severus? Severus! Can you hear me?\" Nothing. He didn\'t have the strength to blow out a candle at that point, and he couldn\'t even find the energy to open his eyes.

He heard the sound of more footsteps approaching. Had he not been slipping in and out of consciousness, he would have worried that it was another one of Voldemort\'s followers, but it was only Arthur himself.

\"Oh God!\" he heard Arthur say in an agonized choke. Severus knew that he was probably kneeling down at Marcus\' body when the other man called out to him.

\"Arthur, come quick! It\'s Severus! He\'s still alive, but he\'s hardly breathing!\" the man cried out. \"Take him back to Hogwarts, and I\'ll finish with...\" He assumed by his words that the Dark Lord was still alive, and Athur\'s response confirmed it.

\"No. We don\'t have the time now, help me lift Severus up so I can disapparate with him. Then I want you to bring Marcus\' body to Hogwarts, as well. We\'ll send Adrian and Guidry to finish up here with him and to retrieve the other bodies. Pettigrew is dead so we don\'t have to worry about himningning power anytime soon. Come on now, help me.\"

Severus couldn\'t remember anymore beyond that and the girl\'s voice snapped him out of his memory.

\"Would you like some tea?\" she asked softly.

\"Please.\" He said roughly, clearing his throat again. He sounded tired and he knew it. Hell, he felt it. The girl seemed to notice this and quickly went to make the tea without any further comment. He watched her as she left the room and once again tried to re-evaluate what few details he could remember.

Why was it that those who were young and good and brave were always the first to die---yet bastards like him seemed to be the ones who got to wake up in the hospital room, only to live another day? Why wasn\'t he dead? He had seen death close-up---too many times to count, but he always managed to live through it. And the fact that Marcus Flint was dead and that he was lying here still very much alive bothered him greatly. He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes again. He must have dozed off, because moments later the soft touch of the girl\'s hand caused him to jerk his arm back.

\"Here you go. I hope I didn\'t wake you,\" she said, smiling faintly. \"I couldn\'t tell if you were asleep or not.\" She raised the end of the bed a bit so he could sit up and she didn\'t let the saucer leave her grasp until she was sure he could hold it. He noticed that her fingernails were short but trim, and didn\'t think much of it at first when she raised her hand, until she startled him again by brushing his hair out of his eyes---yet another annoyance. He slowly took a shaky sip and looked at her.

\"Must you watch me drink my tea?\" he chided, and her features changed. She no longer had the calm, composed look from earlier. Now she looked confused, perhaps even a bit intimidated.

\"I know you\'ve been through a lot, Severus. I just thought you might have wanted some company,\" she said, her voice faltering only for a second.

Her words broke his reserve. \"You don\'t know a damn thing about what I\'ve been through!\" It hurt to raise his voice above a whisper, but he had had enough of this intern\'s irritating bedside manner. Her eyes grew wide and she shook her head slightly.

\"Severus, I know all about...\" she started, but was cut off by him almost immediately.

\"And let\'s get this straight right now, once and for all. While you are employed at Hogwarts you will address me as \'Professor Snape!\' Outside from here I do not give a damn what you call me. Do I make myself clear, Miss...?\" he spoke, as if trying to get her name. \"Miss...?\"

She was still shaking her head, clearly thrown off guard. She didn\'t say anything and it only angered him more.

\"What is your name, girl?! Are you daft? Or did you not hear me when I asked if I made myself clear?\" he spat, while she stood up and backed away slowly, as if in shock.

Another voice cut through the tension, but it was one that Severus recognized this time.
\"Ahhh...I see our patient is up and arguing again!\" the old man said, but the smile did not reach his eyes.

\"Severus...are you okay?\" the girl asked him softly, finding the strength to speak.

\"I\'m pissed off, is what I am!\" he hissed back at her, before turning to Dumbledore.

\"Where does Poppy find them, Albus? Why can\'t we hire competent help around here? She can hardly answer a simple question and she latches onto me every five minutes! She can\'t even make a decent cup of tea!\"

\"Now Severus, you know Hermione is only trying to help.\" Severus twisted his face in a disgusted sneer upon hearing the girl\'s name. The older wizard patted her arm in a reassuring guesture, but she felt no comfort by it.

Her eyes immediately began to tear up, yet she did a rather good job of keeping a stonelike expression. She just stared at him in silent disbelief, as if she couldn\'t handle his behaviour. And truth be known, she really couldn\'t handle it. But she wasn\'t about to tell him that.

For seven years she sat in his class and watched him dish out similar insults to whoever happened to be the unlucky victims for the day. Herself included, on numerous occasions. Yet during her last two years at school, she was surprised to find herself on the receiving end of praising remarks, however subliminal. They weren\'t always phrased in the sense that most compliments usually were, but it was praise just the same. Upon graduation, she was offered an apprenticeship with the complex professor. There was no owl dropping a letter on her plate at the dinner table, there was no \'tea and chat\' with Dumbledore. He had asked her in person, and for the first time, she truly felt as if she had accomplished something really great.

For the next three years they worked tirelessly on various projects. Some of their research was published and re-published. They beat reaction times set by earlier predecessors, improved on a few of the simplest potions and landed themselves in the number one spot of Alchemia Almanac\'s top ten educators/schools for a potions degree. They had gotten to know each other. They could make the other laugh during times of crisis. They could read each other\'s feelings upon entering a room; without speaking a word. They were colleagues, most definitely, one could almost say that they were best friends. And they were almost to the point where...

She tried to uncloud her mind but her eyes glassed over once again, staring at the dark man sitting up on the bed as if he were a foreigner. She couldn\'t believe that he didn\'t recognize her. She was still staring straight at him as she spoke towards the Headmaster, who was looking over Severus\' charts.

\"He has amnesia, Albus.\" she spoke softly. She didn\'t look to be in shock anymore, and she didn\'t seem to be angry with him, so Severus had no idea as to why she kept looking at him the way she did.

\"I can hear, you stupid girl! And I do NOT have amnesia. First of all, I know where I am. Secondly, I know who Albus is, in case you have forgotten, and thirdly, I have some memory of the events that led me to being stuck in this infirmiry with the irritating likes of YOU!\"

The girl\'s expression did not change upon hearing his words. Dumbledore turned to her slightly. \"I\'m afraid he\'s right, Hermione. He does not have amnesia, and the potion he ingested that night may be irreversible, if it is what I believe it to be.\" His features were grave, and Severus gave the Headmaster a hard look.

\"Hermione,\" Albus turned to her, \"I want you to go get some rest. You\'ve been running yourself ra for for the last two weeks and I need you to be in top form if we\'re going to help him out.\" The girl nodded her head, her face showing some of the sad emotion that she tried desperately to hide. \"Go down to the dungeons and get a vial of Dreamless Sleep. Poppy\'s supply of it is out at the moment.\"

\"I\'ll bring some more for her tomorrow,\" she nodded to him.

\"She is not going into my laboratory, Albus!\" he seethed, punctuating each word, before turning to her. \"You will touch NOTHING in my private stores, do you hear me? If I so much as find...\"

\"--Severus!he ohe older wizard raised his voice, causing the younger man to stare at him just as menacingly as he was questioning his judgement. He turned back to Hermione, ignoring the look on Severus\' face.

\"Don\'t mind him, we\'ll sort this out. However, you need your sleep and I need to talk with Severus. I will inform you if there has been a change. When you are well rested, I want you to come to my office or owl-me, if possible. There are many things we need to discuss. Go now---and I don\'t want to see you again unless you can pass a Satisfactory Sleep Level test.\"

At this, the girl actually gave the older man a half-hearted smirk, Severus observed, before taking one last skeptical glance in his direction. Dumbledore noted her apprehension and nudged her. \"Goodnight, Hermione.\"

\"Goodnight, Albus.\" she said wearily, before adding, \"and goodnight...\" At this she paused. Her eyes met Severus\' own jet black ones before she turned around suddenly, leaving the room without finishing her sentence, even if it was just the mere exclusion of his name. He watched her leave and heard her footsteps pick up pace outside of the door and down the hall. Severus knew that if he could see her face right now that it would have been marred by tears.

The girl was a puzzle to him, and it annoyed him almost as much as she did. The girl obviously though she was \'someone\' by the way spokepoke to him and Albus. And access to his laboratory! Had Dumbledore gone mad? If the old man thought for five minutes that he was about to let her have free run about the dungeons, he had another thing coming!

He wore his usual scowl and looked up at the Headmaster. \"Albus, there\'s something about her I don\'t like. And I don\'t want her rummaging through my rooms! She has no respect for...\"

\"Severus.\"

He stopped. holding his sneer in check but letting Albus continue. \"Be patient. The last two weeks have been very hard for her.\"

\"Hard for her?!\" he cut in. \"How in Merlin\'s name has this been hard on HER?!\"

\"She\'s been very worried about you, Severus.\"

\"She doesn\'t even know me!\" he said incredulously. \"She\'s been a thorn in my side ever since I woke up. She won\'t stop touching me, she can\'t answer any of my...\"

\"Dammit, Severus! Don\'t you see?\" the old man thundered back. He rarely, if ever, lost his temper. Knowing of the few times he did, Severus knew that he wasn\'t joking. Things weren\'t adding up right, in his mind. \"You were given a very strong potion.\"

His dark eyes scanned over the older wizard. \"I remember as much, although I fail to see what it has to do with her.\"

Dumbledore smiled sadly, but his eyes were cold. \"It has everything to do with her. Before you ask, let me explain. The potion Tom Riddle wrote his seventh-year thesis on was highly powerful. It was never documented nor mentioned---to my knowledge---since then. It was of his own creation, and although there weren\'t any test subjects used for his potion back then, he received top marks for it. I haven\'t given it much thought throughout the years, as it wasn\'t a very pleasant elixir, but something in my psyche brought it to mind two weeks ago. Hermione and I were going over a handful of the potions we thought could have been responsible for your condition.\"

\"You let her help you with the research?! The girl can barely make tea, Albus...\" he trailed off, rolling his eyes.

\"Severus, please.\" Albus spoke with a pained expression. \"We didn\'t come to a conclusion, but a few of the potions we tested had similar properties to the one I remember Riddle making as a student here. The others we tested were ruled out as a threat, since they caused only temporary effects and no lasting harm could be done.\"

\"What were the potions were you testing?\" Severus inquired, narrowing his eyes.

Albus sighed. \"We were researching both of the Memorandum Eradicus potions, the Nox Gemimor Solute, Nesmarati Tonnika and the Lindale Loss potion, mostly. There were a few others, but they were quickly ruled out as well.\"

\"All basic memory-altering potions. None of which, as you have stated beforehand, could pose as too big of a threat.\" he said as casually as he could. He was very tired again but he shook it off. He had just spent the last two weeks sleeping in, from what he could gather. Sleep could wait for right now.

\"And none of which,\" Albus went on, \"were the ones that left you in this state. It wasn\'t until I heard you and Miss Granger conversing tonight that my worst suspicions were confirmed.\" He had Severus\' full attention now. The young man eyed him warily.

\"So this one particular potion Riddle made while attending Hogwarts was responsible for whatever state of mind I seem to have---or lack thereof? Albus, don\'t lat mat me like that! It involves the girl, I know. The both of you have made that quite clear. What are the main effects of this potion?\" he asked, not sure if he really wanted to know now or not. At first, his mind was flooded with the fear that he no longer could remember potions making in general, but that was quickly extinguished out once he began to mentally quiz himself.

But what of his powers? What if all of his magical resources had been tapped out? He remembered them forcing him to drink the vile substance, and he remembered growing very fatigued soon afterwards. He was now praying silently to every god and wizarding ancestor that he still had his magic ability. He was almost relieved when Albus told him of the potion\'s main cause.

\"It erases a person from one\'s memory entirely.\" No light smile, no comforting gaze. Severus had never seen Albus look so grave.

So this girl was the subject of that potion, he thought calmly, before his face twisted in slight panic from a passing thought. She wasn\'t his wife, was she?! However, judging by her age, she could have easily have been in the daughter range, he deduced. But she didn\'t have the same last name, so that crossed those two out. Maybe.

 
These thoughts did little to comfort the storm that raged wi. To. Too many questions, too many unwanted thoughts. Then again, so what if he couldn\'t remember the girl? From what he had seen of her today, it shouldn\'t bother him in the slightest. She had hardly made an impression.

\"Miss Granger was the person in question, I take it. You don\'t have to answer that if you don\'t want to. I already know the answer.\" Severus said flatly and uncaring.

\"Yes.\" the elderly wizard nodded. \"Hermione was your apprentice.\"

At this, Severus actually laughed out loud. Memory potions aside, he knew himself well enough to know that he would never take on an apprentice in a million years. Not even for the ghost of Merlin, himself. If the situation hadn\'t been so dire, Dumbledore would have found some comfort of his own in the man\'s joking reaction.

Severus didn\'t realize it, but Dumbledore was delighted when Hermione started working under him. The past three years had opened him up a bit. He wasn\'t a \'new person,\' so to speak, and he was still a total bastard in the classroom, but he did laugh a little bit more. And a genuine smile from him, although still a rarity in public, wasn\'t quite the needle in the haystack that it used to be.

Collecting the last few escaping sounds of his laughter, Severus looked at the Headmaster. \"Albus, I can believe everything you have told me up to this. I know from your reaction that I have suffered, if one can call it that, some type of memory loss. But there is no one---on this astral plane that I have seemingly landed on---that could convince me that THAT slip of a girl is my apprentice!\"

\"That \'slip of a girl,\' was the only other person in Hogwarts history to tie with your N.E.W.T.S. score,\" Albus replied solemnly. Severus immediately lost control of composure and started laughing again, even though it hurt like hell when he did. Albus could tell as much with the way the man was cradling his ribs. But he did not smile, and he made no further attempt to get Severus\' attention.

After allowing himself another few moments of laughter, however painful, Severus just turned to the Headmaster, waiting for him to clear all of this up with a mere word or wave of his wand. Nothing came; the only constant being Albus\' grim expression. Severus could feel his own features falling in sync with the older man staring opposite him.
\"Albus...\" he started, a bit unsure.

The wisened wizard just looked back at him. \"You don\'t remember anything about her, do you?\"

Severus looked into the soft blue eyes with even more uncertainty. He searched Albus\' face for a moment as even more unwanted feelings welled up within him.

\"No. I have no recollection of her at all.\"