Terrible Twosome

Warnings: This is Twincest. Twincest is incest between twins. This just happens to be my favorite thing. Especially this type. This is Yaoi/Slash/Gay/Male x Male. I do not like the word gay at all, I am only using it so \'some\' people will get it. That is all.

Disclaimer: “Terrible Twosome” is © Jennifer C Wood (me). The Weasleys and all characters © to the Creator and the company who owns them. I do not own any of the characters except R. J. Koffinmire. He was made up out of a different initials for J. K. Rowling\'s Name.

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New Years In Dad\'s Cellar.

\"It\'s just down here, Fred!\" George hollered to his twin while running down the stairs into the cellar at the Burrow. Little is known, but it\'s a special cellar. Completely filled with all sorts of alcohol Mr. Weasley hides for \'special\' occasions.

\"I am coming, George! These stairs are old remember?\" Fred stumbled on a broken stair and fell onto his brother, coughing due to the dust in the dark room.

\"Watch it there Fred.\" George caught him and looked around, but couldn\'t see anything except the light at the top of the staircase.

\"Dark. hmm..\" With that he pulled out his wand and cleared his throat.

\"Lumos!\" With the flick of his wrist, his wand set a low green glow. It was a bit eerie but it did the.

.

\"Heh. Now we can see, Fred. But it would help if you did the same.\" As Fred took out his own wand to cast the same spell, a small pink box caught his eye.

\"Oy, lookie here, George!\" Fred called, completely amazed that there was a pink box hidden in the corner. George turned to where his brother was, cocked his head to the side, then bent down to look at it. The box was under a few old newspapers from his father\'s day along with a pile of dust.

\"What do ya \'spose it be? Some fanantsantsy French wine box? Or maybe it was from mum and dad\'s wedding?\" Fred went on, squatting to his brother\'s level. He reached out with his wand and poked at it, George had the same idea. Nothing happened.

\"Well, could be, but then again, not all of this stuff is wizard drink. I bet most of it is Muggle alcohol. I here that the sparkling wine spritzers are pretty good. Might be one of \'em! Fred, do you think we should open it up?\" George hadn\'t even finished his sentence as Fred started clearing off the dust from the papers on the box, then George removed said papers to the side.

\"Hmm. It says here, not to open. Why do you \'spose this?\" George just shrugged and wiped the box down with his sweater. He came across a small envelope with their names on it.

\"Hey, look at this. It\'s got our names on it Fred!\" George leaned over to show his twin.

\"Hmm.. Your right. Let\'s open it.\" With that, Fred took the envelope and ripped it open, taking out a letter.

Dear Mr. Weasley Twins, Fred and George.

If you are reading this, then you are completely graduated from Hogwarts School of Witch Craft and Wizardry. We are pleased to inform you that on your completion of learning, you are awarded the special Twiniansastational* Award for the first ever pure blooded Wizarding twins to have ever made it completely through Hogwarts. We have made this letter in your fourth year, hoping you two sharaduraduate in your seventh. But of course you two have, since you are reading this. In sum, we are proud to offer you this sum of twenty million Galleons (Which a small check is included to get said money from GrinGotts) in addition to this award, and a case of Rose Bulb pink wine spritzers, that when you get this will be exactly one hundred years old. Thank you for completing your schooling at Hogwarts.

Sincerely,

Head of School Ministry

R. J. Koffinmire

Luckily their parents and Percy were gone at a party at the Leaky Cauldron, Ginny at her friend\'s house for the summer, and Ron and Harry were out for a walk. Otherwise, after the boys had read over the letter a few times, they all would have heard their hooting and hollering of sheer joy. It was utter madness. Not to mention they booth looked like complete idiots, prancing around like that.

(They will talk in this order: Fred, George, Fred, George, and so on.)

\"This, is so wonderful! We\'re rich beyond our wildest dreams!\"

\"I know, and it\'s all ours!\"

\"Let\'s try some of the wine then, eh Fred?\"

\"Nope, let\'s leave those be.\"

\"But, why?\"

\"Because, if we open that, mum and dad would know what we know and get very cross. We may nevee the the money ever again!\"

\"True. Hmm. Why not celebrate with something else then?\" George indicated to the rest of the room.

\"Yes, lets. Now, give over that letter it it\'s envelope it came in. I\'ll put back and make it look as if we never found it.\"

\"That would be a smart thing to do, add some fresh dust. No, old dust. Heh.\" Fred placed the newspapers back from whence they came, and then cast a simple spell to move the dust from the high shelve tops to the papers.

\"There we go, good as... Well, they way we found it.\"

\"Great! Now we gots a reason to drink!\" George handed his brother a bottle of Green Grape Wine.

\"We had one before? Member? Only it was to mischief.\"

\"To mischief, trickery, twenty million Galleons, and the future!\" Fred opened his bottle, and thrust it up into the air, then took a swing, after of which, he passed it to his twin who did the same. They continued to drink for the next hour and half. Little did they know, Ron and Harry were on their back from their walk.

Later.

After a two consecutive hours of drinking various alcoholic beverages, it is safe to say, or rather, unsafe, that Fred and George were completely drunk.

\"Fred dear, pass me the bottle.\" Lazily, George reached out towards the general direction of his very blurred brother, and promptly fell flat on his face. Fred started giggling like a little girl.

\"What\'s so funny?\" George looked up as he managed to grab the bottle, take the last swig it had to offer and used it for support.

\"You\'re a complete, idiot!\" Fred smiled and leaned down, pecking his brother on the nose. This brought George to blush and straighten up, much like his older brothercy.rcy.

\"What the hell did you do that for!?\" George demanded and sat up and glared at him. Fred just giggled a bit more lunged forward, pinning his poor petrified twin to the cold cobble stone floor.

\"Now that, is a secret.\" He said and shook his index finger. To George it looked like a snake, wriggling like one.

\"What, are you...\" George\'s question was immediately cut short as Fred pushed his brother\'s head to the floor and pressed his lips against his. George on the other hand went as stiff as a board. He mighve bve been drunk, but even he knew what was going on, he didn\'t like it. Or at least, he hoped he didn\'t. As Fred continued to kissed and slobber his mouth, George just couldn\'t help but respond to him. Slowly, he curled his fingers into Fred\'s and brought up his legs around his waist, crossing them behind Fred\'s, well, behind.

\"So you do enjoy this don\'t you?\" Fred said huskily, as he separated himself from his other half. He thought about how beautiful he was. Though they looked alike, he didn\'t consider this vain at all.

\"...Yes...\" Was all George could get out, some how, and didn\'t know when, but both his hands got free, and Fred\' left hand was snaking it\'s way up George\'s sweater, as righright was going down into his knickers.**

\"Oh, gods, what are you- W-why...\" George hissed just as Fred lifted his sweater off his chest, and pushed his face onto it. Fred took in his brother\'s scent. It smelled great. Like himself. Slowly, he began to lick at his nipple and nip at it, making poor George gasp and moan for more. Fred thought he sounded some what like a cat mewing.

\"Yes, dear brother, only for you.\" Fred managed to say, as his left hand found what it was looking for. The belt buckle. He undid it as fast as he could, distracting his twin by licking upwards. His right hand was working hard, and getting the damned sweater completely off. He was doing a lot of work.

\"Fred...oh...\" George was in heaven by the time Fred slipped his cold hand down his trousers. He felt a hand, much like his own, but different in a way, grab a hold of his manhood. He jerked his hips back, then forward, thrusting into that hand. What ever Fred had intended to do to him, it sure was working.*** The hand got a better grip because of the thrusting and so, got a bit faster. Fred was not only milking his loving brother of what he had, but was definitely enjoying this.

George finally got enocourcourage and fumbled with own two hands, in the effort to tear off Fred\'s shirt, Fred wiggled out of it and let go of the nipple. It was stained purple, as was most of George\'s chest. Fred snickered.

\"I don\' think you should walk about the house half clad for the next week, or at least until these lift up.\" Fred grinned, as did George. George was about to say something but it was cut off as he climaxed.

\"Fred...Oh...Sweet Jesus...\" He moaned and panted a bit. He didn\'t want this to end yet. As soon as he got his second wind, he got even bolder.

\"My turn.\" With an evil sneer and a glint in his eyes, Fred was pushed onto his back, much like the way Fred had done to George earlier. Fred was startled at this outburst of energy so quickly after George\'s little \'happy time\'. George leaned over, and kissed Fred as best he could while panting, and while kicking off his pants and boxers. His hand moved down to Fred\'s groin, get it a quick, \'Hello\' grope, then started to unbuckle the belt.

\"My.aren\'t we hasty...\"

\"Oh shut up you.\" George silenced Fred with another wet hungry kiss as his threw the belt across the room. It landed with a thunk against a wooden box somewhere in the corner by the stairs. George cursed at the tight pants Fred had on. He had to peel them off like a banana peel, but it was worth it.

They looked at each other, lust clouded each pair of eyes. Blushing, flushing skin being exposed to the cold hair. Red and orange hair standing stiff because of the cold. With out another word, George grabbed onto Fred, pulled him up, and pressed aga against the nearest wall without anything on it. Fred moaned, feeling a warm hand wrap around his most sensitive area and move in soft, slow and agonizing jerks. He didn\'t even realize he had spread his legs out like an eagle, then wrapped them around George\'s waist.

George felt Fred try to pull him closer, so he complied. Slowly he pressed the tip of his own into Fred. He heard him gasp aloud, shrill and clear as day. Fred pulled his legs tighter around George, making him go all the way inside.

\"Bloody fucking brilliant.\" He breathed, or rather, both did. And with that the moved in rhythm, groaning and moaning each other\'s names. Forever to them, passed by in only minuets.

\"I love you, Fred, more then a brother...\" George panted

\"I love you too, just the same...\" Fred replied, kissing his twin passionately.

Meanwhile.

\"Ron, Where do you \'spose the twins are?\" Harry asked his best friend, a bit curious, as they walked into the Burrow. Usually by now, they would have been sacked, or had something done to them. That was why they were all ready for the Twins, but they didn\'t show, Ron and Harry got worried.

\"Oh jeez, I dunno Harry.\" Just as Ron said that, they heard a loud scream, followed by another one almost the same.

\"The cellar! Those idiots! Dad said not to go down there!\" Ron panicked.

\"I remember what he said. Danger lies down there.\" But as they got to open door, they saw a glowing green light, no two. Running down the stair well, with Harry close behind, Ron nearly trampled the two twins that were tangled in each other\'s arms.****

\"Oh my god! What are you two... And... Ew!\" Ron was disgusted, but he knew this sort of thing would have happened eventually.

\"...Wow...\" Was all Harry could muster. He looked at the two on the wall. He understood.

\"We wont say anything, we promise, RIGHT Ron?\" Harry elbowed Ron. Ron nodded and rubbed his ribs where he was nudged.

\"Yeah, I guess. Mum and dad would kill not only you, but me as well for being out so late.\"

\"We...\" The twins said in unison, then together looked at the other, shrugged and smiled.

\"Thank you.\"

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* Twiniansastational- pronounce it like this (Twin-ee-an-sass-station-al) Yes this word is made up.
** Knickers are like pants or underwear
*** This, little boys and girls, is called mutual masturbation. :) aren\'t I a sick and twisted person?
**** Heeee, I made alliteration!

Well? What do you think?