January

style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial'>8^th January 1982

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style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Arial'>‘You know that I could use somebody

Someone like you...’

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Remus was
practically falling against the door as he hammered on it. The lights were on
in the house, so he knew he was home. He banged harder, his limbs shaking. And
then miraculously, there were muffled footsteps, and he heard latches being
unlocked.

He pushed
back so he wouldn’t fall through the door when it was eventually opened.

Hinges
creaked, the door pulled open and Remus stared anxiously, waiting.

Dark eyes
stood peered out of the crack in the door, dark eyes set in a shocked face.

“Lupin?”
Severus frowned, and opened the door fully, keeping his hand on the side of the
wood.

“May I come
in, please?” Remus’ could barely keep his voice from wobbling. “I need…”

Severus stood
back wordlessly and let him pass, knowing exactly why Remus Lupin would be
standing on his doorstep, begging admittance. He shut the door behind him.

“I need… I need…” Remus tried but the words wouldn’t come, and he slumped
against the wall of the hallway, face bowed and screwed up in pain.

Severus
walked up to him, swallowing. He put a hand on his shoulder. “Remus, I’m
sorry.”

“I’m sorry
for you, too.”

And at 21,
they looked at each other with the same tortured eyes with which they’d looked
at each other, aged sixteen, five years ago to the day. Both broken, both
distraught for their losses, tangled in the same destructive web.