Finding Home

Chapter 6

                                                            ~Draco’s POV~

It all went black. I no longer had control over my emotions. Everything I felt was exposed. The anger and loss. She had no right to take herself out of my world. How could I go on without her? She was what held me here. I could feel a warm hand on my shoulder. Taking a deep breath I looked into hard green eyes.

“Draco, what are you doing here?” Harry may have been understanding but he wasn’t one to mince words.

“Pansy said that she committed….” I couldn’t get the words out. I couldn’t say that she had taken her own life. That she had used my razor to slice into her own beautiful soft skin. Because I had pushed her too far.

“She tried to take away the pain,” Ginny corrected. “Hermione, is alive. But you are a fucking idiot. Do you have any idea what happened to her that night? Do you know what Theo had planned for her? In her home, during your party? Have you asked him?” “Better yet, have you seen the guy!?” Harry and Ron were both grinning and looking at me like I didn’t know the punchline.

“No. I got your note and flooed Pansy. She said that Hermione was gone and that our bathroom was covered in blood and my razor was on the floor. Why would I have looked for Theo?” and then it hit me. “Hermione was being held against her will. And I was drunk and didn’t see what was happening.” I slowly closed my eyes to shut out the looks of irritation that were being bestowed. “What would I see if I found Theo?” This new understanding was burrowing itself deeper and deeper into my psyche, making me grasp the situation in its entirety. That I really fucked up.

Ron excitedly informed me that Hermione had broken his nose and given him a black eye. Good girl.

Harry slipped a slightly crumpled piece of parchment in my hand. It had noticeably been passed around and reread multiple times. “You will help us find her.” Ginny was terrifying. I was almost afraid to say no. “It says she doesn’t want to be found.” Almost afraid, but honestly more afraid of Hermione. I had to hand it to her. She certainly knew how to pick her friends. This group of people wasn’t about to let a little thing like Hermione’s need for distance and privacy keep them from contacting her. “But she’s going to have a baby. She’s pregnant and she…..”

“wants to protect this baby. From me. Because I am, in your very own words “a fucking idiot.” As I apparated home I knew that I had to find her. Not because I deserved anything but because if I didn’t apologize and beg for her forgiveness there would never be any reason for me to exist. She had to know that she was my light. That without her, I disappeared. She had to see that I didn’t know, that it was a horrible error, that I felt she had cast me aside. Without her I would freeze in time, I needed her warmth to strive. Her strength. Her resilience. She had to know that I cherished her.

But I absolutely was not going to tell her band of crusaders that I was going after her.