Why I Submit

When we agreed that I would be sent to my room for small offences I thought that it would be an easy punishment.  I guess Draco and Severus thought so too.  I don’t know if it was my time with the Dursleys or the scene that we had just played out that caused my reaction, but it was extreme, and it surprised us all.

Both Draco and Severus pulled away from Harry, “how do you refer to us Pet?” asked Severus.

“I’m, sorry Sir, I must always use Sir, or Master, or another respectful term” said Harry feeling upset that they had pulled away after what they had just done.

“Then you understand that you have to be punished for your omission, don’t you Pet?” Draco more stated than asked.

“But…” Harry started.

“Quiet Pet, do not extend your punishment but trying to get out of it” Draco said cutting him off.

“Sorry Sir” Harry said meekly while looking at the ground.

“Come with us Pet” said Severus as both he and Draco move towards the door.

Harry stood up desperately trying not to cry and followed them out the door and back to his bedroom.

“Right, you are confined to your room until we come for you,” Severus instructed and they walked out and locked the door, leaving Harry alone in the room.

For several minutes Harry stood just looking at the door while not really seeing until almost without warning he sank to the floor sobbing quietly.  He cried as feelings of abandonment swept through him as the warm cared for sensation was replaced leaving him feeling used, dirty, worthless.  After almost 20 minutes Harry cried himself out, then exhausted he curled up in a miserable ball right where he was and fell into a restless and troubled sleep.

Severus and Draco managed to stay away for an hour.  They had spend most of the intervening time forcing themselves not to check on Harry. They felt torn, they didn’t want to leave him alone after that scene but they also knew that they had to set and keep the rules from day one or they never would.  As they opened the door to ‘retrieve’ Harry they wondered what they would be walking into and how annoyed he was going to be.

“Oh shit Sev,”  Draco exclaimed seeing Harry collapsed on the floor face stained with tears.

“Let’s get him onto the bed” Severus said moving to pick him up.

As Draco went to strip him Severus stopped him “no, he’ll feel vulnerable if he’s naked, just get him under the covers, good, now get in with him, we mustn’t allow him to wake up alone.”

And that was how the contract ended.  In fact I think we spent longer negotiating it than it lasted.  For me at least it ended up being a valuable lesson, while I don’t mind allowing a partner to take the lead and I definitely enjoy playing out scenes like this one.  I have definite lines that cannot be crossed and lingering damage from my childhood that comes up in ways I never expected.

After a long conversation we decided that we would try for a more conventional relationship but where BDSM was played out in the bedroom on a regular basis.

For a ‘normal’ relationship we sure managed to do some crazy things though.  But that’s a story for another time.