Across the Quidditch Pitch

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Chapter Five: The Letter


The three of them sat on the benches towards the back of the Great Hall at the Slytherin table, almost oblivious to the clamor around them. Breakfast was already halfway over. The owls had come soaring in, one of them bearing Severus’ copy of the newspaper he’d subscribed to. None other than the wizard’s, Daily Prophet, of course.

Avery and Mulciber didn’t like to waste time scouring for news. They had made it Snape’s job to brief them every morning long ago. But that was only for news that mattered. Any news on the Dark Lord or anything that impacted the old Wizarding families was all that mattered to them.

“Anything interesting, Snape?” asked Avery.

Snape didn’t answer, but just shrugged.

“When I become a Death Eater…” said Mulciber. Snape noticed he sounded like some over eager big shot, which was Mulciber's usual tendency to be supercilious. “I'll probably wind up being featured in the Daily Prophet for something significant. Mark my words, we’ll all be famous supporters. Dangerous missions....imagine the power the Dark Lord will grant us. Perhaps I will be a spy!”

Snape couldn’t help but guffaw skeptically over his pumpkin juice, spitting the contents back in his goblet. Mulciber twisted irritably in his seat, but nevertheless, he resisted admonishing his friend for the cynical attitude.

Avery took note of Snape instead. “What? You think it unlikely?”

Snape set aside the Daily Prophet. “As a matter of fact I do. Why would the Dark Lord assign us his most important missions? Even after we graduate, we'll still be three inexperienced young wizards. We haven't proven anything to him.”

Avery looked to Mulciber to answer that. “We all have our families to back us up. They’ll get my foot in the door, Snape. And so will Avery's family. Well except for your case…You'll just-”

Mulciber looked away from Snape from across the table. Snape looked away from Mulciber. It was an awkward moment.

Avery spoke, “Let’s see…I know I’ll do fine in the service because my dad’s in it, and so is my grandfather and three of my uncles.”

The conversation faded away into senseless babble to Snape, adding into the background noise like the hundreds of other conversations going on at the moment. Snape went into a reverie of consideration for his own position. His father surely wasn’t a Death Eater. He wasn’t even a wizard, brooded young Snape. Tobias was nothing but a worthless muggle. He hated his father and resented how, like so many times before, Avery and Mulciber's higher statuses alienated him.

‘However…I am half a Prince,” he thought proudly but grudgingly. His hand curled around his beloved Potions text, resting on his lap underneath the table. His mother, Eileen had used the very same Advanced Potion Making book in her schooldays. Although it was designed for Sixth years and beyond, Severus was just entering his Second year when his mother bequeathed it to him. Snape had always managed to stay a few years ahead of his peers. After finally recognizing his son’s precocious mind, his mother decided to give him a leg up so that he might just get ahead. Well, at least he knew he was smarter than Avery and Mulciber, he thought as he observed them, sizing up their character and comparing them with that of his own. Voldemort would be more impressed with he, the Half-blood, despite the two of them being pure. But still there was a nagging doubt in his mind. How could he be so sure of this, unless he met Voldemort? If anything in the paper was true, it seemed the charismatic leader was a proud espouser of Pureblood supremacy. It appeared he’d never accepted an individual less than pure. Severus wondered if this was indeed true, or perhaps it was just the media spin.

His thoughts were rudely interrupted by an unexpected source. Severus felt his heart flutter to a galvanizing halt. The figure of Lily Evans was standing right beside him. Severus felt something of a tingling warmth creep through him when she tapped his shoulder.

“Good morning, Sev! I have a message for you.”

Snape’s eyes flickered with excitement, as he glanced at Lily’s clear green eyes, which positively glowed in the morning light.

As if she could read what his expression meant, she added, “It’s from Professor Dumbledore.”

Instantly, Snape’s face fell. He suddenly felt stupid. ‘Of course Lily wouldn’t give him a note! What was he expecting, a sentimental love letter?’

He hoped he wasn’t blushing. He must remain discreet at what he’d been hoping she was going to give him. “Oh – er thanks,” was all he could muster.

“I have to get back. It’s a big day today – Well, bye!”

And she bounded away, her limbs moving with a fluid gaiety. She was so happy. Snape longed to feel happy with her. But he couldn’t. Not this time. Not unless he had her, were his selfish thoughts.

Snape went for the note from the headmaster, with a very grim expression. The news couldn’t be good.


Dear Mr. Snape:

There is an issue that must be dealt with as soon as possible. Obviously, it concerns the conduct of your friend, Mr. Mulciber. I expect you to report to my study along with Mr. Mulciber at seven o’clock this evening.

Sincerely:


Albus Dumbledore


Snape read the note very quickly two times and then was obsessively slow on the third. The angry feelings toward his father dissipated, and so did the pleasant ones regarding Lily. Replacing this all was a sense of ominous doom. He didn’t know what it was about the note, as he hardly knew Dumbledore’s personality on an individual level. Yet from what he could glean, Dumbledore barely sounded cordial in his writing. In fact, the headmaster seemed to be expecting Snape to be expedient at showing up at seven tonight. The whole letter sounded very demanding. There was no semblance of a mood to it. Snape could hardly tell how angry the headmaster would be. But one thing was for certain; he was in a lot of trouble. A rock and a hard place. But Snape wondered daringly if there was a way that he could wheedle himself out.

“What’s in the note?” said Mulciber plaintively. He had been watching for Snape’s reaction.

Snape was instantly on the defensive, blaming Mulciber. “You idiot, Mulciber! Dumbledore must have suspected something of my participation. Now he’s summoned me to his office, same time as you!”

Snape felt a whoosh of rage at the look on Mulciber’s face. He was actually grinning slyly. “I guess your getting it! The same punishments will befall you as they will for me.”

“Maybe not,” growled Snape. He glared across the table at Mulciber’s smug expression. Mulciber was glad that despite refusing to rat out his friend, he was still getting the same comeuppance.

Snape felt another whoosh of dread and asked tentatively, “What’s it like anyway?”

“What?”

Snape felt himself blush slightly. The rage towards his father was forgotten now. He now felt a loss of honor and growing shame at the probable punishment that he might receive later. He whispered, “You know, getting the cane?”

Mulciber frowned and chewed slowly on his toast looking thoughtful. “It’s definitely painful Snape. I’ll tell you right now that the stinging doesn’t wear off immediately. But once the stinging subsides, it burns like a branding iron.”

“Oh, come on…It can’t be that awful,” he scoffed.

“Fine. Don’t believe me. You’ll find out for yourself soon enough.”

“Maybe not,” added Snape quietly. “I’m going to lie to Dumbledore.”

Mulciber lurched, practically jumping out his seat. “You’ll never get away with that. He’s a Legilimens, Snape.”

Snape pushed aside his plate and stared at Mulciber loftily. “Haven’t you even heard of Occlumency?” he asked imperiously.

He and Avery both shook their heads.

“Well Occlumency can counteract a Legilimen’s power. It's a very rare branch of magic. But I’ve been exercising it for awhile now, and I’m going to take a risk. We’ll see if I’m equipped enough to deal with Dumbledore. Should be interesting...”

Avery gaped at Mulciber and then back to Snape. “You’re – Are you – Out of your mind?”

“No. I'm only trying to avoid more trouble. I never liked trouble and was never in trouble. Until now…” and Snape sounded bitter. “I'm having second thoughts about another attempt....I don't think it was prudent for me to plan it for you the first time. There's no way it will ever work.”

Mulciber rolled his eyes and snapped something back at Snape. It was about the promise Snape made yesterday to help him get the chance to have another go at Mary again. But Snape wasn't listening.

He was glancing over his shoulder at Dumbledore. The old man looked his usual self, content and at ease. He wasn’t even looking in Snape’s direction, but busy chitchatting with Mcgonagall. It was a relief to know the professor hadn’t bothered to look at him when he received the note from Lily. Or had he? But at least Dumbledore wasn’t looking at him now, and because of this, Snape felt some blessed relief.

Snape’s black eyes flickered to Lily across the Great Hall at the Gryffindor table. The Hufflepuff faces between them were nothing but blurs. He had eyes only for Lily.

Things were different today. After the incident with Mulciber, Snape felt intense guilt. Perhaps he wasn’t good enough for Lily afterall. The memory of watching Mulciber attempt to hurt Mary yesterday had somehow invaded his feelings for Lily. He was painfully aware there was a side of him that enjoyed watching Mary suffer. Lily would probably be disgusted with him if she knew.

Lily didn’t see him, but Snape remained with elbows crossed over the table staring darkly right at her, his eyes slanted. She was hanging out with that James Potter again. Snape felt a wave of jealously.

His own brain, his entire mind was tainted with dirty thoughts after what happened to Lily's friend. His imagination was whirring like never before. He could not just stare at Lily. He could almost see through her clothing. Unconsciously, his eyes widened at the thought of touching those supple breasts that must lie beneath the little cardigan.

He tried to shake off his lust. He knew deep down, he could never attempt to really hurt Lily. But he wanted her, to possess her and know she was his to own and his alone.

The moments slipped away until breakfast ended and suddenly Lily was leaving the Great Hall. Snape forced himself to look away. He needed to go to the library. Today was the Defence Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.


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