For all the times he saved me

Severus stood frozen to the spot. Open the door. OPEN THE DOOR. But it seemed to become somewhat of a regular occurence, his body not listening to his mind when the girl was involved. He glanced over to Remus. Remus? Yes, for now he was. Remus was looking a little amused. Great. But that could be remedied by a long hard stare. There, no more smirk.
"Just open it Severus, she won't bite." He snorted. She might. A thought surfaced. No. It sank. He heard a soft thud on the other side of the door. He opened it.

She gave up. She was too tired anyway. She turned and slid down the door untill she sat. Wait. Wait. Bored... Sleep? No, not in the middle of the corridor. What if a student walked in on her? Great way to start a job as a respected librarian. She could see the headlines now: War-heroine Hermione Granger found passed out in a Hogwarts corridor by student. Or, had Rita Skeeter still been a reporter: War-heroine Hermione Granger found passed out in a Hogwarts corridor, with student. hmm... She really was tired. She had run out of originality. She yawned. And fell backwards squeeling.
It's quite a weird phenomenon. One moment you're sitting up, staring at the wall opposite, and the next you're on your back, staring into the disgruntled face of Severus Snape, and the amused one of Remus Lupin. Oh. Interupted something did she? Her face flushed at the thought. Not embarresment though. Far from it. She went up a shade or two. Quit it. She knew about Remus, but Snape? Not sure. Could be. Would explain why the two had been 'working' so closely together nowadays. Wrong. Bad thoughts. Moving on now.
He was staring at her. Remus looked like he could burst out laughing any moment now. He was still staring. Okay. High road.
"Is one of you gentleman going to help me up or what?" She gave them a lopsided grin. Remus moved, stretching out his hand. He didn't. He was still staring. It was starting to freak her out. Remus pulled her up and very unceremoniously dusted her off. Just great.

Remus looked at his friend. Oh. He looked like he was going to breath fire any moment now. It was subtle. Only a few people in the world could see it. He did not count himself lucky to be one of those. He had been the recipient of a real Severus tantrum a few times too many in his opinion. And he was about to experience another one. "Maybe I should leave?"

What?! NO!

"NO!" they simultaneously said it, or, yelled it more like, maybe just a little bit too fast and a little bit too loud. Remus had two hands raised at him, both looking as though they would actually cause him bodily harm if he left them alone now. Oh hell. He wondered. Did they know themselves? Time to investigate.

Five minutes later, Remus had the both of them situated in the livingroom, with a glass of scotch in their hands. All right. Now to try and get the screaming to stop.
"You can't possibly be appointed those rooms! Impossible." Severus huffed.
"Oh and why is that so impossible? Well? Those are my rooms, and you are telling me I can't move into my own rooms? Who are you to tell me that?" Hermione screamed back at him.
Remus sighed. This was going to be harder than rivalling first-years. He cast a spell. There. Silence. Oops.
Now the both of them had turned on him. Wands raised. He simply raised his hand.
"No" He said. "Sit and listen. Hermione, I don't know why Minerva appointed you those rooms. And Severus, I am very much aware of why you do not want to part with them. Neither of us really. But this is Hermione we're talking about. I don't think a lot has to change about the room as it is now."
He lifted the spell. They looked at him like he had gone insane. Maybe he had. Severus would kill him later. The fire in his eyes was still burning, and not in a good way. He would so be toast. Toasted. Maybe even served for toast at breakfast. What a way to end. Eaten by prepubescent idiots for a substantial meal.
Hermione was the one who spoke first. "What do you mean, change the room? What have you done with it?"
Remus looked at Severus, who was, very uncharactaristically, still silently seething. "Would you care to show her what her room looks like?"
Severus stood up and stalked out of the room, robes billowing. Hermione stared after him. He came back.
"Well?" He said, eyebrow raised sceptically. Remus looked at him closely. 'Gods, if he was gay...' Next to him, Hermione rose from the couch. Just slowly enough to piss the sultry bat off some more. Good. Remus might not have been allowed to leave, but he wasn't stupid either. He sat down on one of the comfy chairs, summoned another glass of, well, any alcoholic drink would do, and waited. Hermione went through the door.

"OH. MY. GOD."