A House Homecoming for All

The sound of tinkling jollity filled the little hall where Cait had stumbled upon an old piano, horribly mistreated and neglected for what looked like a good twenty years or more judging by the collection of dust gathered on its top. Cait was not to be disuaded though and merely pulled a face before using her fifth scouring charm - she was getting quite good at those.
Now, as she was playing \'The Entertainer\' with ease, she enjoyed the reverie that the old upright provided and let her mind wander to a place where there was no adjustment period or new incantations to learn.

Prof. McGonnagal had taken her out to Diagon Alley personally the day prior in order to purchase a want from Oleander\'s and all other necessary writing implements and parchments for the upcoming year. At the last minute, Jessica rushed up to them as they were just about to floo there from Dumbledore\'s office (now securely protected by various more deadly charms which only goblins knew of - where\'s CW when you need him?) after many a flirt and flutter about his chamber door for fiteen minutes. Apparently, Tiera and Andrew had alrady made arrangements with Lupin and Sprout to go that afternoon which left Jessica baseless and pissed.

\"Honestly, it was a simple prank - I mean, she deserved it for being such a thoughtless pool of catspiss!\" Jessica grumbled as she was finally permitted to go by a scribbled note from Prof. Snape out of sheer exasperation from the previous night.

When Cait and Jess were left alone in Flourish and Blotts, Cait stumbled over one of Lockhart\'s old biographies in the clearance bin.
\"Who\'s this pansy?\" Cait queried, raising an eyebrow and batting her eyelashes in an impish impression of the animated man on the cover.

\"Oh, that\'s just Lockhart - he\'s gone crazy, now in St. Mungo\'s... did you know Snape goes to visit him sometimes?\" Even Cait took a step back; in knowing the least about the magical world she never tried to purport she knew of anything remotely involved with Harry Potter or the like.

\"What?\" Jessica smiled and sat down at one of the tables where a stand of quills were arranged for recording names of authors and prices by management - she really wasn\'t supposed to be sitting there. Cait tentatively sat down across form her, keeping a very obvious lookout, eveow aow and again cocking her head strangely from side to side.

\"Oh, don\'t worry about it,\" Jessica drawled, idly fiddling with one of the quill\'s tips against her forefinger, \"the thing about Lockhart and Snape is... they mutually disliked eachother.\"

Jess grinned maliciously and Cait rolled her eyes, \"Which means they hated each other.\"

\"Oh, hate is such a STRONG word, Cait,\" Jessica simpered whimsically, stroking the quill against the palm of her hand like one would do a feather, \"more like, Snape was the more intelligent, argal ignored and despondent in the long run, and Lockhart was pretty and garrulous - the perfect combination for commerical success.\"

\"How sad,\" Cait commented genuinely, begginning to feel more at ease. Jessica stopped playing with the quill and pushed her weight forward in the chair so that she was leaning in close to her friend.

\"You know what\'s really sad?\" Jessica asked, a manic tinge to voicvoice as though she was dying to scream somthing but determined to conceal it none the less.

\"What?\" Cait asked slowly, mentally preparing herself.

\"How long Snape\'s gone without a decent lay,\" Jess snickered and leant back in her chair, her hand attempting to cover her rapidly reddening face. Cait sighed worriedly and leant in towards the pile of goo that was Jessica.

\"Jess, how do you know all of this exactly?\" Jess\' eyes glinted in peremptory bliss, her voice barely above a harsh whisper.

\"I had detention last night, eh?\" At this Cait plonked her head against the back of the chair a little too hard for good measure and winced on impact, still nodding for Jess to continue.

\"Well, I thought I was going to have to clean a stack of couldrons or chop some disgusting animal up like in the books whenever Harry got detention, but when I got there, it seemed like Snape only wanted to talk to me...\" *********FLASHBACK**********

**** The door to the potions lab was open and Jessica slouched to face her fate as the epitome of penetence so she might get out early. Looking sorry always helped the odds of getting off any punishment, no matter what the crime.

The first thing she noticed was that the room was uncommonly dark as it would be hazardous to have nothing but the brightest light affordable by the torches during experiments. Creeping through the tables still wary, she placed her bookbag at her usual spot and moved as quietly as she could to the front of the class where Snape\'s desk was even more ominous looking like some tope coffin. Shivering, Jessica spotted a note scrawled in a tiny, jagged hand she assumed was his and picked it up before checking her surroundings once more.

Miss Slytherin,

Please report to my chambers as soon as you arrive. I have nothing for you to do in the lab.

SS

For some reason, flashes of the Kamasutra popped into Jessica\'s head and her stiffled giggling reverberated against the clammy, slime ridden dungeon walls almost sureally. Jumping at the sound of her own voice, Jessica high-tailed it out without a second glance behind her.

Jessica grimaced as she tried to recall exactly where Snape\'s room was located; something about beging adjacent to the lab four or five paces. Measuring her gait and stride, Jessica hopped five steps to the right and tried pushing on one of the stones but to no avail. Growling to herself at feeling tardy for something she even wasn\'t supposed to look forward to, she tried again, this time on the opposite side and received a loud shriek from Peeves as he popped out from the very wall in front of her.

Blowing a raspberry, he sped away before taunting a hardly affable alliteration, \"Silly Saphic Sorry Stupid Slytherin Student Sorceress!\"

\"Oi! You\'re the reason I have to be here, you puny bit of jelly! Come back here and tell me what you THINK Saphic means and I\'ll prove you wrong right here in the hall!\" Jessica whinnied as loudly as she dared as no one was in sight. Behind her, she heard to click of a door opening and the warmth of a body behind her. Pivoting slowly, she got what she expected; with a mild scowl on his face and a tapping foot, there stood Snape, her living Dracula... Snapula, if you will.

Squeaking out a few bouts of nervous laughter, Jessica looked up and met the cold hole like depths and found her voice.
\"Sorry I\'m late - I just got your note and had trouble finding your quarters... good thing I ran into Peeves, eh?\"

If she didn\'t know better, she could\'ve sworn she saw the hint of a smirk at the edges of his face before he sharply turned away and waved for her to follow. Shuffling uncomfortably behind him she entered his \"lair\" and sat down in one of the chairs offerred. Taking this opportunity to observe her specimen in his natural environment, Jessica smiled appreciatively at the decourous carvings of grapes and mice on the coffee table while Snape was doing something unknown behind a wall opposite.

\"Who did these carvings?\" she called as Snape returned with a glass of water and some tea.

\"I did,\" Snape said curtly and passed her the glass as he sat down on the other side of the table. Jessica beamed her pleasure at running into another artist at Hogwarts.

\"Oh, it\'s very fine! What kind of wood is it?\" Snape seemed taken aback at all of Jessica\'s questioning already whereas he was supposed to be head of house, thus in charge of every situation *scoff scoff*.

\"It\'s oak, but why I rea-\"

\"Oh, wow! That\'s supposed to be a really difficult wood to work with. You know I saw this documentary once about carving mohogany mantles it was really interesting. This guy had learned from a man orginally from Africa who was transplanted in the United States, eventually adopted his style, and now designs abstract furniture for Ikea!\" Snape looked stunned and merely stared holding his cup delicately above his lap. Jessica blushed and fiddled with her fingers for a few seconds.

Continually looking downward, Jessica sipped her water pensively before placing it carefully down on a coaster.
\"Do you make any other sort of art... like drawing or painting?\" Looking up hopefully, she was met yet again by the calculating stare of her mentor; she looked away. Snape cleared his throat and put his cup down opposite her glass.

\"I do sketch... on occasion,\" he said slowly as if waiting for her laughter, though none came, \"painting, however, is too messy and time consuming...\"

\"Ah, yea...\" Jessica murmured as she looked up again and this time kept eye contact long enough to see Snape\'s face soften and the look of anticipatory rejection melt away, \"there\'s lots of beautiful architecture around here to try and capture.\"

Snape nodded and picked up his tea again, quizzically staring over the rim. Jessica\'s calm exterior broke and her face lit up michieviously.

\"So, I\'ve been a bad girl... but I can explain if you want a reason,\" Jessica said suddenly, her face blurred in an obfuscation of embarrassment and pride.

\"Well, yes, that would be nice,\" Snape said tersely and intertwined her fingers in his lap, \"you HAVE lost house points for it as well as what little respect you intially managed to salvage from the headmaster.\"

Jessica twitched in her seat, aware of the unfair prejudace she sufferred by Dumbledore - just because she was related to evil didn\'t mean she was the next generation of Satan incarnate.

\"Alright...\" Jessica conceded and crossed her legs none too wisely as the hem rode up too far; she was still unaccustomed to wearing such a uniform and propriety seemed to fly out the window with her modesty. Blushing profusely now, Jessica frantically rearrangd her skirt, making matters worse by drawing attention to it so Snape had to avert his eyes.

\"Tiera was very unkind to Andrew when he was seeking her comfort after his introduction to his \"mentors\" if you can even call them mentors, being the living dead and all. She was rude and insensitive and it\'s unfortunate that I got caught in forgetting to put a silencing charm up,\" she finished proudly, sitting up straight with her privates covered appropriately.

\"Right,\" Snape said flatly and stood up to put the tray back in what Jessica assumed was a kitchenette. Grinning helplessly at not being immediately chastised, she stood up immediately after.

\"May I help you with anything?\" Jessica asked silkily, attempting to recover some semblence of her manners after flashing Snape her underwear.

Again, looking back fertively, Snape shook his head and made his way back with an absolutely dour expression on his face. Jessica sat back down and wrenched out \'Crime and Punishment\' from her greedy little bookbag, recently enchanted by one Draco Malfoy in seventh year to prevent anything from falling out, making grasping anything on purpose infernally difficult.

Cursing under her breath, Jessica didn\'t notice Snape regarding her again until she finally managed to extricate the stubborn cloth text with a great yank, half falling to the floor. Frowning her own patented death glare at the bag, she sat back down and broke the spine with familarity until all silence was broken.

\"I\'ve heard of that one - revered by muggle critics, is it not?\"

\"Oh yea, it\'s considered a classic - it\'s very good. Have you read any?\" Although Jessica couldn\'t see how this coversation was related in the least to her backfired scheme of revenge, she wasn\'t about to argue with a chance of being let off, especially if the optional discourse revolved around fine literature.

\"Part I,\" Snape said softly, crossing his legs and looking at the smaller version to his curiously. Jessica\'s eyes glinted again and she passed him the copy.

\"All the dogeared pages contain significant quotes I\'ll have to use in an exam to determine my university standing in June... or at least, I was going to have to use them,\" Jessica\'s thoughts raced heavily like giant boulders falling down upon the tufted grasses of her mind. All of her plans were to be posponed because of this magical new life... as if she didn\'t have enough on her plate as it was.

\"It won\'t be that bad for you, Miss Slytherin,\" Snape murmured after reading a few of the pages turned. Jessica looked up and smiled again, disarming her teacher with glee. Snape shyly and ever so slowly returned it, albeit a sorry example or rather, a sorry hidden one as he put the book directly over his face as if he was fifteen again.

\"I don\'t know... hey!\ssicssica nearly shouted as a thought came to her, \"what was Lockhart like?\"

****Interruption****

\"Uggh, FINALLY, the relevence wth this Lockhart guy,\" Cait complained a clicked her nails upon the clear varnished table still bookless and beverageless for this sort of tale.

\"Hey! It\'s called building romantic suspense, Miss Instant Orgasm 2004!\" Jessica said loudly enough to attract some looks of disapproval and chuckled contentedly.

\"Right, go on, but McGonnagal wants us to meet at the Leaky Couldron at two, remember?\"

\"Yea yea, anyway...\" ******FLASHBACK********

***** \"Lockhart was an incessantly tedious fop who deserved no more than to be locked in the closet his proclivites were so clearly trapped in,\" Snape spat, a bit surprised at his conviction and wondered breifly if he\'d spilled some veritiserum in his own drink.

Jessica burst into laughter at this suden honest and ostensibly untenable change but was thankful for the comic reprieve.
\"That\'s great! I could get that much from the books, but were there any instances you were able to see more than just a flouncy little figurehead of popularity?\"

Snape blinked and put the book down closed on his lap tentatively whilst his ruminations undid him.
\"I don\'t know why I should tell you,\" Snape regressed and crossed his arms petulently in front of him. Jessica smirked and reached for her bookbag, automaticaly hungry and seeking its lost prize.

\"Okay, may I have my book back please?\" Jessica held out her hand and felt her heart drop as he passed it back to her, their fingertips touching for just a moment. Jessica swallowed; Snape stood.

\"If you must insist on leaving just because you didn\'t get what you wanted immediately, then I\'ll tell you,\" Snape stated and sat back down again with Jessica in close pursuit.

Snape steepled his hands and looked through them at Jessica, her eyes large and open to new information.
\"Those who are so heavily publicised often have tacit insecurities seldom drawn upon or addressed...\" Snape began to fidget and Jessica nearly burst out laughing as it was so contrary to his immoveably firm stance during class.
\"Lockhart was the epitome of insecurity and I for one, couldn\'t stand it...\"

\"But didn\'t he get all that he wanted - isn\'t that the price some people have to pay in order to recieve the beneifts never claimed by confident individuals who don\'t constantly strive for acceptance?\" Jessica asked emphatically, quitting her innocent little preamble and Snape met her gaze completely.

\"He didn\'t deserve losing his life for his misguided fortunes, Miss Slytherin,\" Jessica nodded and waited for him to carry on.

\"As you may know, Lockhart now resides at St. Mungo\'s for having lost his memories in a backfired obliviate... I go to visit him on a regular basis-\" Snape suddenly cut himself off when he had realised what he\'d just said - ***********INTERRUPTION********

***\"Whoa, he confided in you?!\" Cait asked superflously but with sincere interest,

\"Oui, ma cherie,\" Jessica sung.

\"Now you got him going, honey,\" Cait winked and looked at her watch again, \"are you almost done because we\'ve got about half an hour and I\'d actually like to do some browsing.\"

\"Yea yea, anyway...\" *****FLASHBACK, YET AGAIN - LAST ONE, I PROMISE**********

****Snape looked away and stood up abruptly. Sensing his uneasiness, Jessica quickly followed suit, shoveing her C & P back into the open gannetmouth of her cloth wielding weapon and approached the door. Snape couldn\'t speak but merely nodded her out.
Before completely through the threshold, Jessica got up the spunk to make Snape a proposition.

\"If you ever want someone to discuss Crime and Punishment with, I\'d really like to,\" Jessica paused, looking over the now clearly emotionally dishevelled man before her, \"it\'s such a rich, complex and devastatingly tragic novel.\"

Before completely passing through the threshold, she paused and simply said, \"I think it\'s really admirable, you doing that for him... I don\'t know if he did a lot for you but I have some inkling that he didn\'t, and well... I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate all you do around here...\"
And with that, Jessica flew down the halls into the common room where she ran up to bed... and her pillow.

***********************************************************************************************************

Cait was about to have an anuerism from listening to Jessica\'s touching tale and only purchasing one flimsy roll of parchment instead of the required twelve.
\"Oh, Cait - it\'s not a problem! Honestly, ther\'s plenty of time yet to come back and get some more supplies before school actually starts. Draco said that he could apparate me here next week if I needed to do some shopping, I\'m sure he wouldn\'t mind taking you along too.\"

\"Ew, Jess. He\'s Draco-\"

\"Hey! He\'s not so bad if you get past the Byronic hero complex and moronic obsession with beating Harry Potter at everything...\" Cait scoffed and put up her hand to silence.

\"No, I think I\'ll pass just the same and ask McGonnagal if I can come again BY MYSELF so that I don\'t get sidetracked.\"

\"Oh, come on, you have to admit it... someone\'s going to get laid!!!\" Jessica shrieked happily down the mainstreet to the Leaky Couldron, a frission of precognitive assurance rushing through herns. ns.





A/N: It\'s a start, eh, Jess?

Clarifications for this Chapter: Although school hasn\'t actually started for our four lovely scions, Jessica is well aquainted with all five published books of Rowlings, and is well aware of Snape\'s described teaching style and therefore can imagine what a difference seeing him in private would make. Draco has been associating with Jessica because sometimes he gets weary of his mundane, aristocratic existence and finds solace in helping his favourite Potions Master in order to kiss up before term has even started during the end of sumemr break. YAY!