Tented

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Part 13


Draco Malfoy was fairly certain that he was losing his fucking mind.

Not that he didn’t have plenty of reason to, it was just that, well… he had always been rather fond of his mind. He was going to miss it.

He had begun to suspect what was happening earlier in the day when he had noticed something a little strange. Trapped out in the woods with a sick partner who had barely murmured a syllable in two days, he had found himself talking to… well himself, but that wasn’t why he thought he was going crazy.

Draco had swiftly grown bored with his own company. After all, he had heard his own stories a million times, so he had started to, unconsciously at first, talk to the small dragon they were currently holding prisoner in a cage Draco had transformed earlier from a crushed soup pot.

Talking to a little lizard was not why Draco thought he might have gone round the twist though. No, not at all.

It was when he began to suspect that the lizard understood what he was saying and was, after a fashion, answering him back that he first got an inkling of his fast approaching insanity.

It had all started innocently enough, most things do after all.

After spending most of the afternoon scouting around close to their camp Draco had found some wild cabbages and some non poisonous mushrooms that he could use along with some of their supplies and the herbs he had gathered earlier to make a broth that he was sure Harry would be able to keep down.

Neither he nor Harry had eaten in quite a while, and it was just one more worry for the blond. Despite Draco's best efforts, the poor little pervert had not made any significant improvement and he really needed to get some food in Harry to help keep his strength up.

The big problem being that Draco needed a pot to cook the broth in and well, there was a dragon squatting in their former soup pot so that made it a little difficult.

Looking around he had finally found a small pot that he could have used if it wasn’t half crushed, so Draco took it and a large smooth rock he had found and attempted to beat it back into shape.

Well… first he showed it to the dragon.

“You see this?” Draco said, waving it dramatically at the still pissed off reptile. “This is all your fault!“

Looking back, that really should have been the first clue that his marbles might be getting a little loose in their sack, but at the time as he had other things on his mind; it slipped by him unnoticed.

The dragon made a disgusted noise and turned its back on him as if to say, don’t look at me you git, you two idiots brought this all on yourselves.

Grumbling under his breath Draco set about beating the pot back into shape until finally he had it in fairly reasonable condition. (it looked like a really, really, really bad modern sculpture.)

“There now!” Draco said, pretty well pleased with his ingenuity.

The dragon looked back over its shoulder and snorted with what sounded like amusement. Draco ignored it. Obviously the uncivilized reptile had no appreciation for great art.

He fixed a hot broth in his severely warped but functional pot and then managed to coerce Potter into eating about half of it, even though Harry looked like it hurt to swallow every bite. Draco cleaned his wound again and reapplied a poultice to the hot, red and swollen skin, then wrapped Potter back up in the blanket and again banked the fire in the hopes that Harry could sweat out his fever.

Settling himself on the ground near the tree stump to eat some beef jerky he had found in their supplies, Draco watched and worried over Harry. The ministry hadn’t heard from them for days now. Surely they would send someone to check on them soon, and then he could finally get Harry to a proper hospital.

“Yeah and then maybe you can explain why you bit him.” Draco said out loud to himself. The bite was quite obviously human and he was quite obviously the only human that had been anywhere near Harry for weeks. It was going to take some creative thinking to explain away that one without getting them both in a shit storm of trouble.

When he looked up he noticed that the dragon was looking at him curiously, he also noticed that it was rubbing its little round belly and making high pitched mewling sounds.

“Hungry are you?” Draco said as he reached into his pack and pulled out some more dried beef. He moved a little closer to the cage and carefully held out a small piece of the food to the tiny dragon who immediately grasped it in both claws to shove it in his mouth and chew furiously.

“I guess you are hungry aren’t you?” It was probably just his imagination but he thought it nodded yes. In either case he gave it another piece of jerky, which it quickly devoured much like the first.

Harry moaned softly in his feverish sleep, but Draco heard it just the same and glanced over to make sure he was okay before turning back to give the dragon another tiny morsel.

It took it but just held it for a moment before it looked over at Harry, and made a low cooing sound from deep in its throat; then wolfed down its treat. Draco stared at it in astonishment as it stuffed the piece of meat in its mouth.

“Don’t tell me, “ he snarked, “Potter has another fan.”

The lizard just looked up at him and blinked.

Draco looked over at Harry and sighed, “You’ll just have to get in line with all the rest of them….. Knibbler….” he looked back at the dragon, ”I think ill call you Knibbler, would you like that?”

The tiny dragon preened a little and licked its claws so Draco decided that it must like it pretty well.

“You know Knibbler,” Draco murmured, “if we don’t get out of here soon we might really be in some big trouble.”

Knibbler glanced over to Harry and then back to Draco.

“Yeah, I know, “ Draco sighed, handing over another sliver of beef “I’m worried about him too but what else can I do?”

Knibbler chewed the jerky and looked thoughtful.

“Don’t ever tell him this,“ Draco said nodding towards Harry, “but I think it would kill me if something really happened to the aggravating git.”

The small monster tilted its head to the side and seemed to be studying Harry with sympathy in its golden eyes.

The blond pushed another piece of jerky into the cage and looked back at Harry, allowing his worry to distract him for just a moment. Draco sighed heavily again, “You know sometimes I think I might just be in lo….YEEEEEEEOOOOWWWWWWWCHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”

It turned out to be a moment the blond would live to regret, as Knibbler had apparently grown tired of the jerky and decided to go for some fresher meat. The miniature Godzilla made a quick lunge and latched on to Draco’s finger with an amazing tenacity.

All Draco could do was howl and dance by the cage as he frantically tried to jerk his hand back.

“Cuticle! Cuticle! CU. T. CULLLLLE!!” Draco shrieked as he flailed around violently, finally managing to yank his hand free of the ferocious little lizard, though not without leaving a right goodly chunk of his index finger behind.

“Motherfucker!” Draco swore loudly as he examined his abused and throbbing digit. He had been right! The midget bastard had gotten him right on the cuticle!

Not only did it hurt like a son of a bitch, lizard lips had ruined a perfectly good manicure!

“You evil little arsehole!” Draco hissed as he stomped back over to the cage. “It will be a cold day in Hades before I feed you again you ungrateful wretch of a reptile!”

The tiny dragon calmly looked him square in the eye before it stuck its forked tongue out and blew a very rude raspberry right in his face, and then to make matters worse, it sat there with its nose in the air and a smug smirk on its scaly little lips.

Draco gave it the finger.

*

*

*

0_o

Oh yes…… he was most definitely losing his fucking mind.


Part 14

Draco Malfoy had been through a great many things in his short life. War, snake faced wanna be dictators, that time he had walked in on his parents playing “hide the salami” right on top of the dining room table during his class field trip to Malfoy Manor. (the whole class was awash in a big fat steaming pile of family history that day!)

The one thing that had always remained a constant for Draco, the thing he depended upon above all else through even the most trying of times, was the sure and certain knowledge that no matter what catastrophe might befall him, or what hell hole he might end up in, he could never, ever under any circumstances be afflicted with anyone or anything that could possibly be more aggravating than Harry bloody fucking bloody Potter.

Of course, that was before he had the great misfortune of being stranded in the middle of a stinking forest with a pocket sized dragon shooting him the bird and somehow managing to give him lip without ever actually uttering a single word.

Despite popular belief Draco was not an unkind person. However…..

If that dragon made those goddamn kissy, kissy noises just one more time when he went to check on Harry he was going to snap and kick its little dragon arse so hard flames would be shooting out of both ends by the time he was through.

He had told it so.... It did not look the least bit impressed. Gods but he hated dragons!

Well bloody fucking hell! Draco grabbed one of the bottles of fire whiskey that he had so miraculously recovered earlier and plopped back down by the fire.

Things seemed like they might actually be looking up. Harry was resting peacefully and seemed to finally be somewhat able to fight off his fever. The dragon might be a rude little bastard but it was hardly going anywhere. There was really nothing else for it. Time to get pissed.

Two hours and a full bottle of fire whiskey later, it was blisteringly obvious to Draco that Knibbler understood him in ways that family and friends never had and never could.

“D’you know why I likes you K-nibbles old boy?” Draco slurred as he breathed enough fumes on the tiny dragon to make the real Godzilla go stumbling through downtown Tokyo.

"You're not so bad, even if you are a liz-bo,“ Draco smiled fondly at the now slightly glassy eyed dragon, “you’re rather annoying, and scaly. And you bite me. And you’re rude. And you gave me the finger. And you’re breath smells like sulfur. And really, you have no redeeming qualities whatsoever, but apart from that, you don’t judge me dude!”

“Draco?”

“Yes Knibbles?” Draco answered, grinning ear to ear at his new found slimy soul mate.

“Ummm… Draco?”

“Whah? Huh? Oh! Oh HARRRRRYYYY!” Draco sang out, thrilled to see his partner alive and moving again. He walked over to where Harry had just managed to sit up. Well actually, he started out weaving about two feet of the way and crawled the rest but you get the picture.

And Draco didn't know exactly how it happened or why it happened or even, for a few incredibly drunk moments, if it was actually happening at all, but somehow he ended up in Harry bloody Potter’s arms, sitting in Harry bloody Potter’s lap for Merlin’s sake, then Ha-arrryyy’sss tongue took a long wet swipe across his earlobe.

A split second before he completely passed out cold in Harry Potter’s arms, Draco Malfoy just knew he heard some GODDAMN kissy, kissy noises!

TBC…

Part 15



Draco Malfoy awoke the morning after his sojourn to whiskey happy land to three surprises. The first surprise being that he awoke to find himself sleeping cradled in Harry Potter’s arms. The second surprise (disappointment? Shut up!), being confirmed after a frantic moment spent groping his own arse, was that he was still wearing his pants. Meaning that although Potter had had the perfect opportunity to molest him while drunk, nothing had happened.

What the hell was the matter with the git? Ummm, he meant Yay! *weak cough*

The third and most pleasant surprise was that upon looking more closely at Harry he could tell that he was no longer hovering on the verge of death.

Potter’s cheeks were pink but healthy looking and when Draco reached up to touch his forehead he found that his temperature seemed to be pretty close to normal. Potter really had no excuse for not molesting him then. Ummmm, he meant Potter …. Oh fuck it! *weak cough again*

*kissy, kissy*

Draco’s head shot up to glare at the little smug dragon in his cage and he immediately regretted it immensely as his body chose that exact moment to remind him that he had indeed drunk a whole bottle of fire whiskey the night before.

His head was pounding — No wait, that was the petite gargoyle bouncing merrily in its cage. Bastard!

Draco made several very unbecoming noises in the back of his throat, teeter-tottering dangerously on the edge of puking his guts out. Harry had his arm draped possessively around the queasy blond, quite effectively cutting off any discreet exit.

Harry snuggled closer and breathed hot on his neck while tightening his arm around his stomach and suddenly Draco couldn’t be bothered with niceties’ any more. He forcefully threw Harry’s arm off and prayed to make it to the edge of their campsite but barely managed to make it to the other side of Knibbler’s stump.

Stumbling most of the way, he heaved loudly until his belly was completely empty and cursed; looking up he found himself almost eye to eye with the annoying lizard.

Draco blinked at Knibbler. “What?” he spat.

The dragon smirked as if to say, I told you so.

Draco moaned and clutched his head, this was all he needed, and even worse he had no one but himself to blame. Gods he hated it when that happened!

Draco stuck his tongue out at Knibbler and then glanced sideways at Harry sheepishly, hoping he was still sleeping and hadn’t noticed. Harry Potter was, of course, wide awake and staring at him. His partner burst out laughing, “Malfoy… did you just?

“Oh shut it Potter.” Draco scowled, face heating at having been caught in the act of being so immature.

Harry was still a little wobbly but he managed to stand up and walk over to the stump.

“Honestly Malfoy, keep your tongue in your mouth unless you intend to use it,” he teased, peering into the cage.

Draco stared in with him, waiting for Knibbler to give Harry the bird or stick his tongue out or anything really, but he just sat there looking lizardy, like every other lizard in the world. Bastard!

Harry frowned. “You look horrible.”

“So do you. What did you expect?”

Draco’s hair was limp and he hadn’t shaved in days. The blond stubble on his chin was so pale it was barely there and Harry secretly thought that it made him look scruffy and adorable.

Harry shook his head. Only Draco Malfoy could make unshaved and just hurled look like a fashion statement.

“Its about time you stopped lazing about Potter.” Draco’s grin took most of the sting out of the words. “Its nice having you conscious again. Its so... tiresome... to torture someone who cant appreciate the effort."

Harry grinned back at him, “Is that your way of saying you missed me Malfoy?”

Draco huffed, “I didn’t miss you Potter, I was just afraid I might have to dig a hole to stuff your putrid corpse in and you know how I hate to get my hands dirty.” He studied his nails with deep interest.

Harry leaned in closer and whispered, “I missed you too Malfoy.”

“HUMPH!” Draco started to stomp off.

*kissy, kissy*

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Draco washed his face and brushed his teeth with the one toothbrush he had found and heaved a sigh of relief at almost feeling human again. After a light breakfast for the patient, (his stomach churned at the thought) he inspected Harry’s shoulder and declared it officially on the mend.

Harry looked as pitiful as possible, “I might still need a little nursing and quite possibly to have my temperature taken the old fashioned way several times.” he pouted.

Draco gave him a dubious look. “You know I don’t have a thermometer Potter.”

“Don’t let that stop you.” Harry leered.

It had pretty much gone like that the rest of the day. Though much improved Draco found that Harry wasn’t quite ready to give up all the petting he‘d been receiving, so he continued to give it to him. In spades. Constantly checking his temperature,(NOT the old fashioned way) clucking over the poor dear as he spooned vile herbal mixtures into his mouth and just generally being as much of a nuisance as possible.

By the end of the day, Harry was positively chafing under Draco’s smothering ways so when the blond said he was going to fetch more water the brunet had leapt to his feet, snatched the disfigured pot out of his hands and practically demanded to go.

Draco watched in amusement as Harry left a cloud of dust getting away from him. He had known it wouldn’t take long.

While he was gone, the blond fed Knibbler, being extremely careful of his fingers and gave it some fresh water. As a special treat, he also gave it a sliver of chocolate that he had found in their supplies. The tiny terror had really seemed to like it and Draco couldnt help grinning at its blissful expression. Afterall they were drinking buddies now.

Abruptly the small lizard backed up in its cage and hissed loudly, its eyes wide and flashing dangerously.

The hair suddenly stood up on the back of Draco’s neck and a cold prickle of fear ran down his spine. He knew before he ever turned around that he was not going to be happy to see whatever was behind him.

The wolf was standing, it’s hackles raised and it’s mouth distorted into a dangerous snarl. The creature was huge, had matted, dirty gray fur, and glacial almost colorless eyes peeking out above a large snout. The long fangs were clearly visible, even from across the camp and a bilious string of slobber dribbled from the corner of its mouth--slavering hunger.

Draco stumbled back, eyes glued on the bulk of muscle and meanness in front of him, mind desperately racing as it looked for an escape route.

Dear sweet Merlin, he thought hysterically, I’m too young and pretty to die!

The wolf crouched and he could see every muscle in its body tense as it prepared to attack. Its cold eyes were on fire. Its teeth were sharp and unforgiving.

“Oh Gods!” Draco whimpered, “Harry I lo…”

The wolf smiled. Icy terror crawled through his stomach. It had smiled; the huge creature had smiled at him. Those huge teeth…. All the better to eat you with my dear Draco.

He found himself trembling uncontrollably.

Out of the corner of his eye he sensed more than saw a movement; Draco gaped disbelieving as one slim claw started to thread its way through the bars of the cage and then quite easily released the latch.

The next few moments were complete chaos and it was then that the blond knew for sure that Knibbler had never given he or Harry anything more that the lightest of love bites.

As soon as the latch was sprung the tiny dragon hurled itself through the air and landed gracefully right on the massive wolfs back. Fur flew everywhere as it struck with claws and razor sharp teeth, burying its head repeatedly in the wolfs scruff as it tore chunks from the thrashing, howling animals neck.

My God, Draco thought, eyes wide and mouth hanging open, its like watching a piranha on crack.

The beast howled in pain, and desperately tried to shake the tenacious dragon off of its neck, floundering about wildly. It was over in a matter of seconds, the wolf may have been fifty times larger but it never stood a chance. With one last howl of pain it took off through the forest with its tail tucked firmly between its legs.

Knibbler had dropped to the ground as the wolf fled and now the little scruff diving liz-bo just sat there calmly licking its bloody claws clean while Draco stared at it in awe.

Harry chose that instant to come waltzing back into camp, “Why is that lizard out of its cage Draco?” he demanded, sloshing water everywhere.

Twin smiles twisted first a scaly pair of lips followed very quickly by pink bows; their eyes meeting silently as there in the middle of nowhere, two very different dragons came to an understanding.