Maternal Instinct

"...Daddy! She's taking ages! Get her out! I'm bored! I'll die if she doesn't get out now! Please..."

Severus tried once again to block out his daughter’s voice. He had never realized how impatient young children could be; or was it just Corrin? He hadn't spent enough time with her to know whether this was a regular occurrence or not.

Corrin tugged on his sleeve, but she wasn't very strong so he ignored it easily. His fingers continued to tap steadily on the wooden surface of the table, the slow, unfaltering rhythm contrasting drastically with his thoughts.

Hermione was still in the shower. She had been since before he woke up and he had been awake since eight o'clock. It was now just gone eleven. As he had dressed, he had heard her crying over the noise of the water. They were not sounds of terrible sadness, but sobs of anger and frustration. Severus had not made the mistake of trying to approach her; it would have been a mistake on his part, as there was nothing to guarantee he wouldn't say the wrong thing.

So he had left and decided to talk to her when she came out. But she had yet to leave the bathroom. Corrin had woken up and had known, by way of some childish instinct, that Hermione was awake as well. The girl hadn't left Severus alone for a second, begging him to go and find Hermione relentlessly.

Finally, there was a creak on the stairs; it was the only sound that told of Hermione presence, but Corrin heard it and raced from the dinning room, leaving Severus to follow slowly. He watched from the doorway as Corrin pulled on Hermione hand.

"Play with me!"

Hermione stroked her hair smiling regretfully, "I will later, Sweetie, but I have to go out now."

Corrin squealed and threw her arms around Hermione’s waist, "No! No, no, no! Please!"

Trying to pull the girls arms from around her, Hermione said quietly, "I have to, Sweetie. It's really important. I'll only be a couple of hours, not too long."

But Corrin clung on stubbornly, "I'll die! Please! Stay and play with me! I haven't seen you for ages! You don't love me! You hate me! You hate me!"

Severus would have found the blatant emotional blackmail amusing if Hermione hadn't looked so guilty. She sat down on the stairs, saying kindly, "Don't be stupid. I don't hate you. I love you very, very much. Do you understand?" She waited until Corrin nodded reluctantly before she continued, "Now, if you calm down and let me go quietly and," She glanced briefly up at Severus, "if you're good for your dad, I might see if I can buy you something while I’m out -"

Corrin shrieked with delight, "Will you get me a girl cat to go with Mr. Snuggles! Please! I'll die if you don't! Please! Daddy says I can!"

Hermione laughed, "Did he?"

The girl nodded, "Yeah! He did! He did just now! I heard him! Please! Get me Mrs. Snuggles!"

"Alright," Hermione stood up and stroked a hand over Corrin's hair, "I'll see what I can do, but only if you behave yourself..."

"I will!" Corrin said resolutely, "You can I ask daddy!"

"I will," Hermione reassured her, "Go and find Mr. Snuggles, then." Corrin moved around her and disappeared up the stair. Hermione brushed passed Severus as she went to the front door, "I'm going to see Ginny. It's her wedding in four days and I think she's feeling neglected. I should only be a few hours, if that, so... I'll see you later."

He barely had time to nod before she left.

""""""""""""""""""""

Hermione sipped the tea that Ginny had made for her, as she attempted to listen to the redhead. But her mind - and her whole body for that matter - felt hollow, empty. Except, of course, for guilt. A great, malevolent, shadowing guilt that was eating away at her like acid.

She had never had a particular view on abortion. It depended on the woman and her situation; it was her decision. Hermione had only known that she wanted children and, unless something terrible happened, she probably wouldn't have an abortion.

But she had. Just to save herself the pain of another miscarriage. Had it been selfish to take that potion, when that little egg would never have turned into a baby anyway? It felt selfish.

And Hermione was angry. Angry that she had been put it that situation. Angry that Amy and probably Viktor - and possibly Ron - had put her in that situation.

Taking a deep breath, Hermione tried to tune in to what Ginny was saying.

"... a dress. A really nice one. Not as nice as the one you'll be wearing on the day, but I think hen nights are important and I don't really want to do anything too... much, considering what you've been through this week -"

"No, Ginny. If you want a big hen night then -"

"I want you there, Hermione." Ginny smiled, "And if that means I have to wait until the honeymoon to get completely drunk then all the better for my mum; she won't have to clear up the sick - Draco will. So me, you and some other people are going to that new restaurant place, then we'll come back here and... drink or something. What do you think?"

"That sounds great." Hermione sipped her tea, "What's he doing?"

Ginny shrugged, "He'll probably go and have his last drink as a single Slytherin man with his dear Slytherin friend - a man you may know - Severus Snape."

Hermione sighed, "Severus will be thrilled. Spending the night Draco Malfoy whining about getting married."

"My God, Hermione," Ginny shook her head, "You're beginning to sound like him... Did he take you to St. Mungo's yesterday? After he came here, I mean. I didn't really want to say anything then, but you looked really... hysterical, to be honest. What happened? I know about losing the baby. I'm so sorry. What happened after you left? What was wrong?"

Hermione shrugged, looking down at the table "Nothing... When Severus took me back to St. Mungo's the... the Healer just said it was some sort of delayed pain or something. Nothing terrible..."

"He looked after you though, didn't he? Snape, I mean. Because if he's being nasty or if he's hurt you... well, my foot will come into contact with his dangly bits, before they are permanently separated from the rest of his body."

Hermione laughed slightly, "Thanks for your concern, Ginny, I'm getting along fine with him... All of him. Including a certain part of his anatomy that you seem to be obsessed with."

Ginny shook her head, "No, I'm obsessed with cutting them off." She sighed dramatically, “But... if he's looking after you I will have to control my urges and," She grimaced, "leave them attached to his body. It's against all good reason, but if it benefits you in any way then..."

Almost an hour passed before Hermione left Ginny. As soon as she stepped through the front door, she was accosted by Corrin. The girl inspected her from the front, then circled her impatiently.

"Where is she?"

Then Hermione remember, "Oh... Have you been a good girl?"

"Yes!" Corrin nodded.

"Do you think your dad would say that?"

"He would! He would!" She insisted.

Hermione sighed, "Close your eyes then." When Corrin had closed her eyes, Hermione pulled out her wand and reached into her pocket, where she found a tissue. Pointing her wand at the paper, she whispered some words and then held her hands away from her as it transformed into a small, fluffy white feline.

It made an inquiring noise and sniffed experimentally. Corrin clapped her hands and opened her eyes, "Mrs. Snuggles!" Hermione handed her the cat and she turned towards the stairs, "Let's go and meet Mr. Snuggles!" Giggling, she disappeared up to her bedroom.

Looking around, Hermione found Severus in the kitchen door way. "Was she good?" She asked.

He shrugged and nodded towards the ceiling, "She's been up there with that cat..."

Sensing there was something else he wanted to say, Hermione moved closer, "And?"

"And," He said slowly, almost reluctantly, "I had time to think."

"And?" She asked nervously.

He reached out and drew her closer, "And I know how Amy managed to make that potion."