You took my wings away

The lake was
shining in the night, brimming with life. Animals came from the
forest, sneaking out in the open to drink from its water, covered by
darkness. Mosquitoes flied over the surface, attracted by the heat
from those drinking, only to get caught by the jumping fish. Birds
flying over the lake, diving to eat, catching the jumping fishes. All
to the scenery of light, reflecting on water, enchanting life's
dance with death. Nature did what it could to decorate the dance,
keeping it slow and repetitive, perverse and even brutal in a way,
but also so fair and beautiful.

In contrast
to the lake, the moon was full this night. So bright and white
against the deep blue sky, it almost looked like it was done by
magic. Because of the moon, the night was bright, showing the dance
to those lucky enough to be outside and awake, and unusually enough,
two people were actually watching.

Luna sat by
the big tree, looking down on the lake, thinking of what Hermione
said to her earlier that day. About Ginny. About everything around
Ginny. About the fact that she seemed okay, or, okay in the eyes of
Hermione, at least. About the fact that it didn't seem to matter
anymore. That she was okay... She thought about it while the
agony slowly filled her, making all rational thoughts, those few she
had, disappear. Why did it do this to her?

Luna didn't
know the answer to that, and she really, really wanted it. Even if
she didn't care for truths, facts and answer, she really wanted to
know why. And she didn't have a clue.... For Merlins sake, she was
Luna, and Luna didn't have thoughts and feelings like this! She
watched the lake, hoping it would calm her down, but she knew it
wouldn't. She felt so out of place from her own body, like her
feelings were not compatible with her mind anymore.

She though of
it as a bug, that tried to crawl out from under her skin. She hoped
for a moment that a hinternickle, a thing feeding on emotions, had
nested inside her, and that it was that that made her feel so
horrible. But in realization out of hopelessness, she knew they
weren't true. That they didn't exist. That she didn't believe in
them. And that thought cracked her, the agony flowed trough her whole
body until she couldn't stand it anymore. Luna screamed, and
screamed, disturbing the dance at the lake, creating confusion and
chaos as every animal tried to flee from the threat her screams made.
But Luna didn't notice, neither did she care what happened around
her. She just screamed.

The other
viewer, the second human out in open air, heard her, but didn't do
anything. She just watched the animals run, and then left, without
even looking at the lonely girl that screamed. She couldn't bear to
listen to it, not knowing what to do about it. She fled.

With guilt
and repentance, Hermione walked back to the castle, to the security
and warmness inside.

“Where
were you? I was worried, you know” A sleepy Harry said wearily
as soon Hermione stepped inside the Gryffindor common room.

“ I
watched the night” She answered, as she sat down beside him.
“The lake gets beautiful in the moonlight, with the stars
reflecting on it.”

“Was
that really worth going outside of the castle at 2?” He
wondered, as he didn't believe something like that could beat the
warmness of a bed, especially not when it was so friggin' cold.

“Yeah,
it was.” Hermione simply said, looking away from him, staring
into the fireplace.

“Well,
now that I know you're back, nothing can stop me from going to sleep.
Fricking night to be awake on too.” He said with a yawn, as he
stood up from the sofa. “Yeah right, about the map, did you
find the one you very looking for?”

“Yes, I
did. Thanks” She simply said, still staring into the fireplace.

“You
sure you are okay, Herm? You seem out of it” He asked, with the
usual worrisomeness marking a “good” person.

“I'm
fine, Harry. I'm sure of it, too. Go to bed before you fall”
She said with everything but an assuring smile. “Good night
Harry”

“G'night”

When Harry
had gone up the stairs to his bedroom(or actually, the boys bedroom)
Hermione stood up, not really sure of what she was going to do.
Almost in a trance she took of all of her clothes, still staring into
the fireplace, leaving only her underwear on. She thought of the
screams of the younger girl, and the hopelessness and guilt she felt
when she didn't know anything to help her. Hermione's whole being
ached, for something she wasn't sure of, and mixed with a feeling of
not being enough she needed a release. With voices of reason screamed
at her in her head, she did the unimaginable, and began to touch
herself, right in front of the fireplace. And she couldn't believe
it, not at all. For a moment she saw herself from an outsiders point
of view, and felt the urge to laugh at the thought. What a silly girl
that stood in her underwear, feeling herself up, out of shame. Damn,
that is funny. Aha ha ha ha...

A wet spot
appeared on her gray knickers, and as in trance, Hermione moaned a
single time. She rubbed the wet spot, almost like she wanted it gone,
faster and faster, making the spot bigger as result. She moaned more
and louder, not thinking that she could be heard by anyone, if anyone
went down either stair. She used her other hand to caress her left
breast, her hand under her simple, gray bra. Getting hornier, she was
now almost shaking with excitement, shivers going up and down her
spine, as her finger began to press on the spot, rubbing more and
more fiercely.

She was
panting now, with small and fast breaths, and with a surprise she
came, not far after she started, shivering with shame and guilt. She
fell back on the sofa, trying to calm down, with thoughts going
around her mind, all chanting different versions of “What
have you done, stupid girl?”. After a few minutes, she
realized almost in shock that she was half naked in a public place and she hurriedly took her clothes and belongings and ran up
to her room.

A few minutes
later, when she was laying safely in her bed, she thought of what she
had done in the night, both going and looking after Luna, and
masturbating openly(even if no one was there), and couldn't believe
either thing. She wondered what she would think of herself in the
morning, and as much she as longed for sleep, she dreaded for the
moment she would wake up, making no things easier for her already
confused mind. She feel asleep confused, knowing that it would be
hard going up the next morning.

At 4 am, a
blond little girl went back to her and her classmates bedroom, tired
and with cheeks wet of tears.