Letters From America

Thanks to all who read and the few who reviewed.

This chapter was red-moused by Jilliane. Thanks for the record time in doing it, J.

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Chapter 2


Kid,

I hope this letter finds you well. Harry and I have been on a gruelling schedule for a fortnight and have traced several leads on Severus back to an Indian Reservation (Imagine that! I had read of the natives of this country, but never thought I'd meet one) in the state of South Dakota. We are leaving tomorrow for the Rosebud Lakota Reservation. I hope this is the last lead we have to follow because I miss you dreadfully and worry about your health. (And don't sit there pouting about my last statement. I just want to make sure you're doing well, even if I was a tiny bit overbearing before I left.)

Thank you for sending the sonogram picture of our daughter. I carry it with me to look at when I have a chance. I cannot believe that we made such a thing of beauty (even if all I can see right now is black blobby bits and lighter grey blobby bits, she's still beautiful.) I showed Potter the picture, and he said he thought the baby looked like me and then pointed out the portion he said was the head. I quickly disabused him of that notion. He had pointed out her bum, but I didn't tell him that. For someone raised by Muggles, he certainly doesn't know much about their technology.

&*&*&

There were few times of transcendent joy in Severus' life. His first had been with Lily, when he finally was able to talk to her on the playground, after she had flown through the air. The next was when he had married Antonia; his disbelief at his luck coupled with his adoption by his children had actually made him beam at the woman as they said their vows. Severus Snape finally felt as if he was valued for more than his ability to spy and his knowledge of potions and Dark Magic. He felt as if he belonged. The third and fourth had been when first his daughter, and then his son had been born, with much screaming from Antonia. Of course, he still had all the misgivings incumbent on the newly minted parent each time, but the joy outshone the fear.

Today, he could tell, would not be one such day that he would remember with joy. He had retreated to his lab after sharp words were spoken between himself and his very pregnant wife. She, no doubt in a fit of hormone induced psychosis, had taken it upon herself to advise him about the incumbent intrusion of Potter, counselling him to keep his temper when the bane of his existence arrived to destroy the hard-won peace that the former Potions Master of Hogwarts/murderer of Albus Dumbledore had achieved. Severus had retreated to his lab and was currently slamming ingredients about in an effort to calm his already fraying temper, and ostensibly to organise his already meticulously kept cabinets. Joseph Pony joined him, working quietly next to Severus on the latest variant of Wolfsbane. The young man had a higher stake in the cure now that he had wed a werewolf, in the form of Charmaine DuPre-Red Horse.

After an hour of tense silence, Joseph Pony offered, "Dad, d'ya want to talk about it?"

"There is nothing I wish to discuss," Severus bit out as he began to replace the contents of his Potions cabinet that he had strung out along the granite table. Joseph Pony remained irritatingly silent as he looked at Severus, his dark gaze both ironic and intent. Severus finally answered, "I should have never given that testimony."

Joseph Pony gave a grunt of indeterminate meaning and then said, "It's not like you though, to not help when it's needed." His nimble fingers ran over the diced roots he had been working on, waiting for the time to add them to the potion. He remained impassive as he said, "Stella told me about her vision. It's funny the way her visions affect her; she said that she didn't recognise Blaise. I had to remind her what he looked like. You remember what a crush she had on him when they were here last time."

Severus remained silent as Joseph Pony spoke, his soft Lakota accent becoming more pronounced as he said, "Blaise wrote to me the other day. I meant to tell you. He says Pansy had her baby and they've adopted two kids who were abandoned by their mother. They're some good people, ennit?" Joseph Pony did not pause in his recitation for a reaction from Severus. "He also says there's a job opening up at that school he works at. Says it's for the Potions Professorship. He wondered if you might like your old job back now that everyone knows you're alive."

The words hit Severus like a punch to his solar plexus. He had missed Hogwarts over the years, had begun dreaming of its corridors without the nightmare overtones that had dominated his existence during most of his tenure there. He could not shake the dreamlike quality of the conversation, so he turned to chastise his oldest son for an imagined fault with the potion. They settled into the comfortable banter of two colleagues at work on a common goal.

&*&*&

So, Kid, I've been thinking of Severus more since he's the reason we're here, and I have to admit that I don't think this whole quest is such a good idea. Yes, I want to see him, and Potter has a need to speak to him, but really, does he need us barging in on whatever life he's made for himself and possibly shaking it up? I don't know.

I know you would counsel me to speak to Potter about it, but that might be like speaking to a brick wall. You don't know how mulish and unreasonable he can be when he feels something needs to be 'done' about a situation. I'm sure he's going to run into Severus' quiet (hopefully) life, wand blazing, and shake things up for him. Maybe I'm here for damage control, I don't know, I just know that I want to make sure Severus is well.

Ian always says that God allows things to happen for a reason. I know that's what you're thinking, and you're right. God made you go through hell for a week to give you our oldest, and to let me see you outside my bigoted world view. I went through Tish's death to be able to learn what true sacrifice was... It's just that Severus' life was so tragic and barren and now, well, I hope these Americans are treating him better than we ever did. Blaise hinted that he had become more settled, more peaceful. England was never a nice place for him. Father told me that Severus' Muggle sire abused him terribly and that his mother manoeuvred Severus into murdering his own father. And then there's the whole Potter's mum thing. You know about that. Potter also told me Severus was pretty much tortured during his school years by Potter's father and his friends. It's no wonder he ran from home when he had a chance.

I wish you were here. You always make me think more clearly. You would let me know if I should convince Potter to give this goose chase up or not...

&*&*&

Draco watched as Potter studied the magical road map, purchased in Charleston, West Virginia's wizarding district at great expense. Directional charms , they had found, were limiting when spread over such a vast distance. Potter had set the map over the bonnet of the car, anchoring it with two cans of soda. The darker man's hair was plastered to his brow in the muggy heat of the Miami dog days, and Draco could feel the light cotton of his own shirt sticking to him uncomfortably. He once again thanked all things holy that Liz had liked his hair short. Potter frowned as he traced his finger over the route they would take from Florida to southern South Dakota. The map made the distance seem inconsequential, and only hard experience had taught the two men that driving the small ribbons of bright ink would be impossible to accomplish in one day.

Draco had not trusted Potter when he had said, quite confidently in Massachusetts, that he could drive. Potter had even produced a licence with his picture and the proper look to the document. Draco had said, just before they went to the car rental office in the Miami airport, that he did not trust Potter not to have created the document. He needed proof before he would put his trust in a ton of steel that hurtled down the road at unsafe speeds. Potter had merely grinned and said, "I had to learn to drive. I'm an Auror, Malfoy. It's part of our job requirements to learn to use Muggle transportation."

When Draco had baulked at the prospect until Potter had offered, in a sickly sweet tone, "You can purchase a ticket on a flight, and meet me in Miami if you want. I'll drive there and get a good feel for the States."

"There is nothing to feel here other than bothered and rushed," Draco sneered, as he picked up his bags and headed to the rental counter. He would rather stay in an unsafe steel box on the ground than an unsafe steel box in the sky. At least in the rattling death trap, he could see what Potter was doing and intervene when disaster struck. Draco snipped, "Just rent one that is safe... and no driving over the speed limit, and remember they drive on the wrong side of the road. It wouldn't do for you to get us in a headon collision with one of these barbarians. Father said these Yanks will sue people at the drop of a hat. If we survived."

Potter had merely laughed and rented a small subcompact with a radio he could not seem to work, and not enough room in the boot to store their bags. Draco hated it. It smelled of stale body odour and chemicals, and made him wish for the expansive area he had been incarcerated in at Azkaban. It also did not help that Potter's driving style did not lend itself to confidence. The man could not keep his foot off the petrol pedal, or his eyes on the road.

Draco groaned as Potter began folding the map the wrong way before surreptitiously casting a spell to ensure success with the battered parchment. Draco rolled his eyes. "I supposed this means you have found an acceptable route?"

Potter shrugged. "I found a stopping point for today's leg. We'll drive to Atlanta and find a place to sleep for the night. We should be in there in about nine and a half or ten hours."

Draco bit back the groan he felt rising as he considered the state his arse would be in once they reached the fabled Atlanta. He snapped, "Fine, but this time keep an eye on the metres in that contraption. I don't fancy having to call another local to fetch us some petrol. These Americans unsettle me."

"You'll never let me live that down, will you?" Harry's tone was irritatingly amused. Draco stalked to the door of the Sardine Tin of Death, and cursed when he realised he had locked it. Alohomora did not work well on the fragile Muggle mechanisms of the vehicle. As Potter went to his side of the death trap, he laughed that low chuckle that Draco had forgotten he hated in school. "You'll never change, Malfoy."

They slid out of the parking lot of the Pro-Am Truck Stop, and onto the wide lanes of the highway, both men rejoicing that they were one step closer to Severus Snape.

&*&*&

...And those are only the things I dreamt about doing to you last night. I miss you, Kid, and cannot tell you how much you mean to me. I suppose I have a lifetime to show you.

I have written several postcards to Toby. I hope he enjoys them. I always liked to receive letters from my parents when they went abroad. Of course, I showed them to the entire House to let them see how well-travelled we all were. I was such a shit when I was younger.

I know this is an unfortunate segue, but you have yet to tell me why my father left England in such a hurry. I pray that he is not in trouble. Perhaps he had it planned all along, but I fear that he didn't. The Lucius Malfoy I know would have at least made arrangements to keep in touch with you. Potter has a partner in the Aurory named Seamus Finnigan, if Father does not contact you in the next fortnight, perhaps you could ask Finnigan for information. I do worry about him since his illness and the subsequent unpleasantness of his parole.

&*&*&

Severus remained in his study after a stilted dinner with his family. Antonia was still angered by his sharp words of the morning, and the children had picked up on the tension, becoming fractious and irritable in turns. He had assisted getting them ready for bed and then retreated to his safe haven, brooding over the possibility that this rift might not be so easy to heal. Lily's ghost had intruded once again into his consciousness, in the form of her annoying son's impending visit. Severus rubbed his neck, attempting to ease the dull ache that had started at the base of his skull from the tension he had held in all day.

Antonia's soft hands replaced his longer fingers as she kneaded the tightness out, the muscles becoming tender to the touch as she did so. She stopped after the knotted muscles relaxed and sat on the overstuffed chair's arm, taking Severus' hand in hers. "Baby, you know I love you, right? And I would do anything to help you."

Severus pulled her from the chair arm, into his lap. He thought he could feel the flutter of the little one as he put his hands on her belly. She laced her fingers through his, pressing his palms flat as she did. He said, "I do apologise for my earlier outburst. I merely... I should... I simply wish that Mr. Potter would remain in England. I have no wish to rehash my sins with him once again. He was always so full of condemnation and prejudice."

Antonia twisted slightly so that she could look into his eyes. With a faint smile she said, "Honey, I know you. Was your conduct much better than his? I've seen what you can do to people who irritate you. Remember the USDA inspector who ended up a sobbing wreck when you berated her for her incompetence? You do know she went on medical leave right after she inspected us."

"Cutting remarks have always been my special talent, my dear." Severus allowed himself to chuckle ruefully before he added, "I suppose I can at least listen to Mr. Potter before I throw him out on his arse. I won't make it easy for him to find me, however. The wards and charms will remain in place until he is able to at least come within a hundred miles of our residence."

"You are such a sweetheart. How is it again that I was able to snap you up so easily?" Antonia laughed before becoming serious. "Why does it bother you so much, him coming to see you?"

Severus was silent for a moment, wishing he did not have to invoke the name of a ghost here in this bright land where he had found a sort of happiness. Antonia's belly fluttered under his fingers as he took a steadying breath. "He is Lily's son."

"So, I... don't understand." Antonia shifted in his lap, stirring a delicious heat between them. "If he is her son, surely you got along with him, right? I mean, he's the one you almost died for."

"It was a much more complex situation than that," Severus answered after a heavy beat of silence. "I was... not the man you've come to know. I was shattered by her death, by my failure to keep her from... She married Potter, the toerag that made my life hell all seven years of my school career. If it wasn't for... him... It's all ancient history. I don't know why I'm so worried. Potter will no doubt come here, spew his vile accusations, and leave my life a shambles once again."

"He won't do that, Severus. You know why?" Antonia asked, but did not wait for Severus to respond. "Because I won't let him. No matter what, you are the man I chose to spend my life with. To me, that makes you pretty damned special. I won't let anyone come here and hurt you."

Severus felt his lips curl into a small smile as his heart lurched painfully in his chest. "I do love you, Mrs. Snape. Please forgive my foolishness."

"Aw, it's nothing." Antonia rose from his lap and pulled on his hand. "Now, you have to come to bed and appease my hormones. God, I've wanted you all day."

"Anything for you, my love," Severus replied, as he reached for his canes. "I do hope you can keep up with me."


&*&*&

I shall sign off for now; Potter is readying himself for the day. Yesterday we came from Indianapolis, Indiana, (what original thinkers, these Yanks!) and today we drive from Omaha, Nebraska, to the wilds of South Dakota. Pray for us, his driving is terrifying.

You are my life,

Draco


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