WLTM

Severus walked in long strides along the busy London street clutching the small, rectangular piece of cardboard in his hand. He paused for a moment, checked the address and looked up at the building in front of him. This was it. He took a deep breath and before he could change his mind again, he stepped up to the door and rang the bell.



‘Yes?’ a disembodied voice came from somewhere.



Severus coughed slightly. ‘I have an appointment.’



‘Name?’ said the voice.



Severus closed his eyes a little before looking around slowly. ‘Snape,’ he replied



‘Right hand wall, second brick down. Two wand taps and a push.’ The voice instructed.



Severus did as he was told and heard a soft ‘hiss’ as the double doors opened in front of him. He walked into a large, opulent entrance hall lit by the biggest crystal chandelier he had ever seen. The marble floor swept up to an equally impressive staircase and he looked around himself uneasily. He hadn’t been expecting this.



‘What are you looking for?’ A young squeaky-voiced and very skinny witch sat behind the reception desk, her short crimson hair tight to her head and her matching crimson glasses a little wonky on her nose.



Severus lifted the card from his pocket and handed it to her, avoiding her gaze as she pointedly looked him up and down.



‘Lonely Hearts, second floor. Up the stairs then take the lift…’ she was still staring at him. ‘Why on earth would this Adonis need a dating agency?’ she thought to herself.



Severus smirked. Adonis? He puffed his chest out and looked down at her, his lips curling in a sneer.



‘Thank you…’ he drawled, his voice like smooth dark chocolate, his tongue snaking out and running across his bottom lip a little.



The witch sucked in so much air she started to choke. Severus chuckled and walked towards the staircase as she whispered ‘You’re welcome’ after him.



Ten minutes later and Severus was sat in front of Valentine Passiflora herself. He didn’t know what he had been expecting, but it wasn’t this.



‘Call me Val, ‘ she whispered hoarsely, her voice the result of a 70 a day habit. She had auburn hair and a rounded face. Her facial features were non-descript but her eyes were smiley and bright and when her lips matched them, curling upwards, she wasn’t at all unattractive. She was wearing an oddly shaped black dress and although she was sitting behind her desk, Severus knew she wasn’t very tall. He relaxed a little. Despite the luxurious office, there were no airs and graces here.



‘Just a form to fill in first… Severus, is it?’ she smiled a little at him and handed him a parchment and quill. ‘Need to know what it is you think you want…. Then I will see what I’ve got.’



‘How quickly… before the first date, I mean?’ Severus took the parchment and quill from her, scanning it.



From somewhere deep inside her, Val let out a loud, deep and surprisingly fruity guffaw.



‘You will only have one date. No one ever needs more than one. I know my job, Mr Snape.’



Severus raised his eyes at her. ‘Very confident…’ he murmured.



‘No. Just a talented witch. I have Romany blood, Mr Snape and my mother was a great Seer. All of the couples I have introduced have been soul mates. That’s what I do. It does mean, however… you could be waiting a while. No guarantees your soul mate is also searching for you, you know. She could be shacked up already with a low life who doesn’t appreciate her, not realising that here you are, ready and willing,’ she smiled at him brightly.



‘I’m not looking for sex,’ he snapped at her, ‘I can buy as much sex as one man could cope with.’



‘I know, ‘ Val looked at him appraisingly. ‘I’ve seen enough lonely men in my time, Mr Snape. Sometime sex just isn’t enough, is it?’



She stood and went to walk from her office. ‘Do your form, I’ll be right back.’



Severus had been right. She was short.







*****



LMAO... I hope I am not the only one who gets the hidden joke in this chapter....