Marriage Law Madness

Pansy bribed her owl, Peachy, from its perch with an owl treat. She and Harry were sending a note to her parents to ask about a meeting. “Pansy? Why is your owl named Peachy? It’s an unusual name for an owl.” Harry was discovering Pansy had some really good stories up her sleeve.

“The first day I got her, she flew downstairs with a note to mum for her first assignment. She missed the table edge and landed in Dad’s bowl of peaches. When I called downstairs to see if everything was ok, Dad, who was covered in peach syrup, told me that it was just peachy. The name stuck.” Both of them were laughing as they headed back to their respective dorms.

It was only a short flight to the Parkinson estate. Just as the Parkinsons were sitting down to breakfast the next morning, Peachy swooped in through the window. Wisely she chose to sit on the back of Mr. Parkinson’s chair. Laurel offered her a bit of toast, which she ate gratefully. Finally Mr. Parkinson beckoned the owl forward and untied the letter.

Dear Mum and Dad –
Sorry for the short notice, but we are coming home for dinner tonight if that is all right with you. You can send your answer by Floophone care of the Slytherin common room as there isn’t enough time for another owl. I also want to bring a friend, don’t worry, he knows about Laurel. We’ll Floo as soon as class is over, so we’ll be there about four.

Love,
Pansy and Violet

“Violet? Who’s Violet?” Mr Parkinson looked perplexed.

“I think that is your granddaughter, dear.” Mrs Parkinson said gently.

“She’s named the brat. Great. There goes any hope of convincing her to change her mind. I had hoped she would eventually see sense. But if she is attached to it enough to have named it already, I’d better start rethinking things. At least Malfoy got the Weasley girl pregnant around the same time so we could both back out of the betrothal with some sort of dignity.” Mr. Parkinson looked extremely disgruntled.

“I knew from the first letter she sent after she told me she was pregnant that she was going to keep it, and Lucius arranged for Draco to marry Ginny a full three months before either of them got pregnant. Furthermore, I am pretty sure I know who she is bringing home. There are only a few people besides Dumbledore that know about me that didn’t know already. And two of them are male. One of them is Pansy’s partner in Magical Home Arts. Dumbledore paired up all the single women with unattached men, and it is obvious from her letters that she is becoming good friends with hers.” Laurel spoke up, which was a rarity. Knowing what an embarrassment she was to her family, she usually tried to keep out of discussions.

“And who is this boy?” her father asked sharply. “And since when does Pansy take Magical Home Arts? She’d better not have dropped anything important.”

“Dumbledore made it required for all sixth and seventh years. So she didn’t have to drop anything except Apparition, Dumbledore set up alternative potions. She’ll take the summer term this year so she can stay up on things, that way she can double up on non-pregnancy safe potions and pick apparition back up in the fall.”

“And just what does she think she is going to do with the brat while she is in class? I’m not paying for anyone to watch it!” Mr. Parkinson was irritated that everyone seemed to be trying to make this disgrace easy on her. Only his wife’s pleading had kept him from disowning her, and Fudge had personally intervened to keep them from pulling her out of school.

“The Ministry is taking care of that. With all the sixth and seventh years getting married and trying to get pregnant, they are building a nursery and staffing it with qualified people and a pediatric specialist healer. All the kids will stay there while their parents are in class, and Fudge’s fiancée is raising the money for a playground. To answer your first question, her class partner is Harry Potter.”


“Harry Potter?” Mr. Parkinson’s eyes went wide. “As in Boy-Who-Lived, Gryffindor to the bone, Witch Weekly’s Bachelor of the Year Harry Potter?”

“Yes, one and the same. Harry just got himself adopted into the Snape family after he kept Molly safe from someone who was trying to kill his sister and illegitimate niece so no one would find out. Unfortunately, as you probably read in the Prophet they got the wrong woman and unless they can find a way to strengthen the baby, which is currently depleting Molly, they will have to take the baby to save her life. I think the whole fiasco is what is making Harry so protective of Pansy and the other girls – well, it helps that one of them is now his sister and one of his sister-in-laws is expecting. But Professor Snape has seven pregnant girls in his house, so all his kids pitch in.”

She stopped for a breath. “Harry’s partnering Pansy, Ron’s partnering Fraise who’s one of the ‘Beuxbatons Five’ as the Daily Prophet calls them, Hermione’s helping brew all the prenatal potions plus potions for the infirmaries at Hogwarts and Beuxbatons, assisted by Lucius Malfoy, who’s marrying the pregnant professor from Beuxbatons to free Professor Snape up to look after his wife.”

“How on earth do you know all this. Does she write down every little thing that happens? And what is this about Lucius?” Mr. Parkinson was amazed that Laurel even knew who the Hogwarts professors were.

“Astronomy professor at Hogwarts, marrying Tia DeHarfleur, daughter of the French Minister of Magic, who is pregnant by a guy who teaches at Beuxbatons who apparently reacted rather badly to potential fatherhood. According to Pansy, the guy makes her ex look sweet and considerate. Last I heard her father was still refusing to talk to her.”

“You are better than Witch Weekly’s gossip column for knowing what is going on. I am sorry to hear about Molly, I had hoped that she would be all right. Merlin knows that Snape deserves some happiness, not more tragedy.” Mrs. Parkinson then shooed Laurel off to practice the Piano while she cleaned up the dishes.

~~~

Later that day….

“Ready to go? Sorry I took so long, I needed to change. My school jumper isn’t done yet, and the skirt and a rubber band isn’t very comfortable.” She was wearing the soft lavender maternity robe that Molly had helped her make. Harry had simply swapped sweaters, wearing his Christmas sweater with his black uniform pants and loafers he had borrowed from Severus’ closet. Shopping for new shoes to replace his ratty trainers simply hadn’t gotten done with everything else going on, and Severus had decreed he could not wear them to meet his possible future relatives. A quick resizing charm and the problem was solved.

They stopped in front of the stone Gargoyle. “Tim Tams!” Once the password had been given, the Gargoyle sprung aside and the two of them ascended the staircase to Dumbledore’s office.

“Have fun and be careful. Wake me if you get home after curfew and I’ll walk you back to your common room.” Dumbledore smiled at them. Apparently his plot of putting Gryffindors and Slytherins together was beginning to bear some fruit after so many years of trying. He could remember when Pansy and Harry couldn’t stand one another, and now they were finally becoming friends.

Pansy stepped through the Floo, accepting Dumbledore’s offer of borrowing his soot-proof cape to keep her robe from getting dirty. “Hi, Mom. Hello, Laurel.” Pansy looked at her father, who was sitting in his chair by the fire with his back to her. Finally she screwed up her courage and crossed the room to him. “Hello, Father.” She spoke formally, waiting to be acknowledged before speaking further. This was the first time they had come face to face since he had learned she was pregnant.

Mr. Parkinson scanned her with his eyes, noting her hand placed protectively on the small mound of baby and the soft glow that seemed to emanate from her. Harry had tumbled through the Floo a second after her and was talking to Laurel and Mrs. Parkinson while waiting to be introduced to the head of the family. “You look well, daughter. That color looks nice on you.” Mr. Parkinson seemed to be struggling for words. “Well, did I raise you to ignore your guests? Bring the boy over and introduce him.” Pansy beckoned to Harry and he crossed the room to stand next to her.

“Hello, Sir.” Harry stood as Pansy had done.

“Is this merely a social visit, or do you have business with me?” Mr. Parkinson thought the boy looked far too nervous.

“I am here as Pansy’s friend to meet your daughter Laurel. My cousin is in need of a wife, and based on the information in the petition you sent to me on her behalf, Pansy and I both feel that they would make a good match. As head of the Potter family, I have the power of negotiation.”

That was obviously the last thing Mr. Parkinson expected to hear. “Well, sit down and let’s talk about it. Laurel! Come here!” He gestured towards the couch and the three young people sat down on it while Mrs. Parkinson took the chair next to her husband.

“You see, sir, My cousin was raised as a Muggle. I lived with them for sixteen years before I discovered that he was magical at all. My Aunt and Uncle literally squashed the magic out of him using some illegal Muggle methods. However, he is genetically magical, and according to Pansy we are related to the Parkisons through her great-aunt Rose.”

“Rose? She married the Longbottom boy. How does she figure into this?” Mr. Parkinson was mystified.

“Her daughter Lily regained the magic gene and married into the Potter line, producing Harry. Rose was Harry and Dudley’s Gram.” Pansy spoke up now.

“Interesting indeed. So what makes you think he and Laurel are suited to each other?” Mrs. Parkinson spoke up.

“Well, there were a lot of things that we conjectured about as Dudley has had no exposure to the magical world, that he’d care to remember anyway. He got on the wrong end of an experimental Weasley prank once though.

But he is interested in sports, particularly basketball, fencing and boxing. Laurel likes fencing as well as watching dueling, plus she is a Quidditch fan. I think Dudley will take to it. In other ways they are opposites, she is much more intellectual than him, but I think he needs that anyway. His mother spoilt him to the point he didn’t think he needed to do much. I think all he needs is a good kick in the pants. And Pansy and I both think she is the woman who can do it.” Harry stopped and took a breath.

“Would he mind me going to school?” Laurel asked shyly.

“I have the power to negotiate that, but maybe you two might want to get together and talk about where. You can home school almost anywhere, but he’ll graduate at the end of this year. It would be a pain if you ended up half a world apart. There’s Floo, but it would be easier if you were going to the same school or somewhere close.”

“I could deal with that. I just really want to go to college.” Laurel looked happy.

“He’s coming to Hogwarts for the Easter Hols to meet candidates. You are the only one on the list at the moment. Dumbledore told me he would see about getting you one of the new Magic Laptops as soon as we can make them interact with Muggle e-mail. That way you could instant message, e-mail etcetera and get to know one another a little.”

“And what about the issue of children?” Mrs. Parkinson spoke up.

“According to the Arithmancy numbers that Professors McGonagall and DeHarfleur drew up, since Dudley is genetically a wizard and we would be doubling some of Laurel’s Parkinson genes, the chances of producing a magical child are about 88%. Those are excellent odds. And if they had a Squib, it wouldn’t bother Dudley as until a week ago he thought any child of his would be Muggle anyway.”

“This sounds like an excellent match. Why don’t we see how things go over Easter and then you and I can sit down and negotiate. On that note, dinner is ready.” A house elf had appeared in the doorway and signaled to him.

They had a pleasant dinner, and then they played a game of Wizard’s Monopoly. The pieces moved by themselves once the dice were rolled, and the cards had funny moving pictures. When one of them bought a property, their name would appear in the square. Houses and hotels appeared the same way, making it much easier to play as there were not nearly as many small pieces to lose. Harry was playing with the little dog, who got irritated with Laurel’s top hat when it tried to pass him, biting into the brim. It was very late when they Flooed back to Hogwarts, and they were surprised to see Dumbledore waiting up for them with a tray of biscuits and cups of hot chocolate.

“So, tell me all about it. Did things go well?” Dumbledore asked as he passed the tray around after seating them near the warm fireplace.

“Excellent, Sir, Laurel will meet Dudley over the Holidays. I think we have a match.” Pansy looked happier than he had seen her since before she had gotten pregnant. She hadn’t realized how much her father’s disapproval of the situation and disappointment in her had still been weighing on her mind. As Dumbledore walked them back to their rooms, she felt surer of her decision to keep her child was the right one.