Bound in Leather

no, you're eyes aren't deceiving you. yes, its another chapter. i promised i'd try to finish it up and get it all posted for you. seeing as i'm on the next chapter and happily typing away, i thought i'd put this up for your perusal. please know that only a few small bits of this are actually mine. anything you see that you recognize is from the wonderfully talented j.k. rowling and i'm merely borrowing her brilliance to make me look good. i'm not profiting a cent from this at all. all that keeps me going are the scant reviews that some of you kindly leave for me. i promise that i'll put everyone back when i've finished with them. please don't hurt me.

no smut in this chapter, but there are possibly a few surprises. i don't think there are any warnings to enact, but be prepared in case something pops out and frightens you. if you find that you like this, please feel free to leave a review and let me know, though it isn't necessary. its just nice. thanks so much for reading.

Chapter Twenty Seven: The Good, The Bad And The Shocking
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Malfoy Manor loomed up before Severus, a large and sprawling stone structure that dated back something like five hundred years. The walls were covered with a living lattice work of ivy, the vines climbing up to the flat rooftop some three or four stories above the ground. The stone beneath was a soft gray color that gave an impression of the granduer of a castle. Windows shone in the light that blazed off them, the sun's rays giving impossible amounts of light to the rooms on the other side of the glass panes. Thick panels of velvet hung over the openings, hiding the interior from prying eyes.
There were a large number of chimneys scattered across the expanse of the flat roof, one or two of them sprouting plumes of lazily spiraling smoke. He frowned and stalked toward the door. He didn't bother knocking, he simply shoved the door open and stepped into the foyer.

A House Elf appeared, wringing its hands together as it half-heartedly stepped in his way. He glowered down at the tiny being, daring it with his eyes to try and stop him from completing his mission. The Elf saw the menace in his gaze, squeaked in fear and disappeared in a moment. A satisfied smirk crossed his face before Severus started forward once more, knowing from past visits that whoever was at home was in the large library on the first floor. It was a room he'd become well acquainted with in the past and he didn't think Draco had bothered to change things around all that much. The little ferret was tighter with cash than the goblins at Gringott's.

He stopped before the door, closed to keep the dicussion private, and straightened his clothes. He was due on stage in a matter of hours and had come here straight from his own home after changing from the attire he'd worn to the wedding. He was in his stage clothes, a pair of form fitting black leather trousers with lacing up the sides that had been shoved into a pair of thigh high, suede boots that laced up the backs. His shirt was something sheer and stretchy, allowing a good view of the flat planes of his perfectly muscled pecs. His abdomen was hidden behind the tightly pulled satin panels of a man's black Victorian corset. It covered from just under his pectorals to right around his hips and, though it wasn't laced overly tight at the moment, went a long way toward giving him a very thin waist.

He suspected that Malfoy would shit himself to see his old 'friend' so attired. He wasn't so sure he knew which Malfoy would be doing the shitting, though.

Drawing himself up to his full height, he reached for the ornately curved handles and turned them, then pushed the doors aside. Both silver-blonde heads snapped around as he strode forward, a flourish of groaning leather and flying hair. Fires of anger glowed in his obsidian eyes and he stopped so that both men could look their share before he neatly hexed Malfoy the elder's head from his shoulders. Draco was the first one to recover himself and stood. His eyes were goggling slightly, but he'd learned from the best and there wasn't an ounce of shock to be seen on his pale, pointed face. 'Professor Snape, what an unexpected surprise. What brings you to my humble home?' he asked congenially, one hand held out to his visitor.

Severus ignored Draco for the moment. Instead, he glanced around and shook his head. The room was lavishly decorated with the most expensive of everything, from the paintings on the wall to the carpeting covering the floor. Books bound in old and soft leather rested on deep mahogany shelves. A table was set with a crystal decanter filled part of the way with golden liquid and matching tumblers. The lamps were of the finest crystal and china, their shades hand made to match the bases. Patches of finely woven linen covered the tables to protect them from dust and damage. The furniture was all of hand tooled wood and leather dyed a shade of blue that matched almost exactly the eyes of their owner. Humble wasn't where he'd begin to describe either Malfoy Manor or its owner. He turned his scowl back to where Lucius was and pinned him with a stare. 'I believe your father knows the why of my visit. Do you not, Lucius?'

'I haven't the slightest clue as to what you could mean, Severus,' Malfoy sneered, his gaze raking up and down the outfit the dark man was wearing with an ill-disguised look of disbelief and consideration. If he were a betting man, Severus would wager that, even at that moment, Lucius was giving consideration to the idea of finding himself a similar outfit. Rumor had it that he was currently seeing a married woman with a prediliction for danger and kink. A small surge of smug arrogance rolled through Snape as he came to the realization that he looked far better in what he wore than Malfoy ever could. 'What on earth are you wearing, old man?'

'I do not see how my attire is any of your concern, Lucius. But, seeing as you have taken such a keen interest in my life of late, allow me to congratulate you. I shall be, with the fall term, returning to Hogwarts to teach the many snot-nosed, stupid, spiteful brats that pass through its hallowed doors. I plan to lay down my microphone and pack away my leather trousers to once more pick up my quill and return to the miserable, unwelcoming world that you seem to think I abandoned so readily. I do hope that you find this utterly satisfying, as I will be doing so without Alasdair at my side.'

'Its good to see you come to your senses. You don't belong in that world and you certainly don't belong with that Muggle wench. She's beneath you and purely contemptable,' Lucius said arrogantly, his nose so high up in the air Severus found it amazing that he could see anything at all.

'Muggle wench? What Muggle wench?' Draco asked, clearly interested in this. The younger Malfoy's eyes moved from one man to the next, hoping to learn more about such a tasty tidbit. Severus narrowed his eyes, even while Lucius smiled in a rather superior manner and gave all of his attention to his rotten little bastard of a son.

'Dear Severus was shagging a sweet little Muggle wench who had absolutely no idea who and what he was. Needless to say, I cured her of that ignorance quite well,' the senior Malfoy informed his son in that same smug, arrogant tone.

Draco turned appraising eyes on Snape and gave him that smirk that was so.... completely.... Draco. Severus longed to draw his wand and hex both of them with elephantitis of the testicles. Until the two of them suffocated under the weight of their own stones. But he was sure that someone, somewhere, would find him and punish him for getting rid of the trash in such an elaborate and amusing manner. And, in all honesty, he didn't think they were worth the effort it would take to lift his wand. The two of them didn't matter a whit in the face of what he'd lost. And he'd lost so much that it was nearly suffocating him. Hurting them might make him feel better, but it wouldn't change anything that had happened.

Alasdair was gone, taken from him by the cruel words of someone he'd once considered a friend. Just as their child was gone, taken from them both by the actions of a crazed and dangerous man. Severus felt some of that rage he was so well known for rise to the surface. His hands tightened into fists. He'd lost everything before he'd even known he had it. The anger that boiled and frothed inside of him narrowed down and focused. He turned to Lucius and let the other man see the emotions bubbling in his eyes.

'Good gods above,' Lucius chortled, his face filled with dawning understanding. 'You fell in love with the chit, didn't you? That's abso-bloodly-lutely priceless, Severus. The great, untouchable Severus Snape has lowered himself enough off of his pedastal to fall in love. And with a Muggle, no less. Oh, this is too rich. Positively the juiciest piece of gossip I've ever had priviledge to come across in a good, long while. Its a shame none of our old associates are still around. I'm sure they'd find this small item of keen interest.'

'Bugger what they would think. Bugger the entire worthless lot of them, Lucius. I did not come here to talk over old times with you. I came to let you know that your little plot has worked out beautifully. Alasdair has left me. She hates me because she believes that I do not care for her. All thanks to your vile and venomous words,' Severus snarled at the other man. By now, his wand was in his hand though he couldn't recall drawing it. And the urge to use it must have been shining in his eyes and on his face, because Draco stepped back and gave his father a look that clearly stated the man was on his own.

It seemed Severus had taught the slippery little snake something, after all.

'Ungrateful little wretch,' Lucius hissed at his son, knowing full well he was in over his head. He'd never been able to best Snape at hexes and now he was on the wrong end of the man's wand. It was obvious by the look in Severus' eyes that the Potions Master was going to hex his bollocks off with little more provocation than he already had. 'You should be standing with me. You're my son.'

'I'm also smart enough to know when to keep my mouth shut,' Draco replied softly. He glanced at his father's face, making note of the myriad emotions that were fighting for dominance there. It was obvious that he was scared. It was known far and wide that the only way Lucius Malfoy had ever defeated Snape in a fight was by cheating. There was also disgust. That was most likely directed at himself for not standing beside his father. Draco wasn't stupid. Shock was there, most likely from discovering that the most hated teacher to ever pass through Hogwart's doors was in love. For many years, it had been believed that Snape felt nothing and was, in fact, lacking in emotions.

The most amazing thing to find, though, was a look of pure jealousy. Lucius was jealous of Professor Snape? Draco found that hard to believe. Still, the look was there. He cast a calculating look to his former professor and smiled. 'She must be some kind of woman to have earned your protection, Professor. I've never before seen you so determined to strike anyone down in the name of a female. And the fact that she's Muggle makes it all the more shocking.'

'Alasdair is a special person. Your father has done his best to ruin her feelings for me,' Severus snarled, his wand still pointed directly at the elder Malfoy.

'Why are you letting him win, then?' Draco asked casually. He smiled when his father shot him a warning glance. He ignored it and continued on. 'Does the girl love you, Snape? Does she want you?'

'I had thought she did, but after my treatment of her,' Severus growled, his fingers tightening on the shaft of wood in his hand ominously. 'I would not at all be surprised if she wished to never, ever lay eyes on me again. For that, I have your father to thank. And I plan on doing it properly.'

'Don't bother with him. He's just jealous because you've managed to land someone who truly does love you. Father is still pissed as hell at mother for up and leaving him as she did. Not that I blame her one bit for that,' Draco shot a pointed look at his father. It earned him a sneer from his sire. He ignored it and turned back to the other man in the room. 'Tell me one thing, Professor. Is this girl worth it? All of this? You're apparently very willing to inflict a great deal of harm on my father, regardless of consequences. Is she worth all of that?'

'Of course she is!' Severus barked. 'Do you think I would be here if she was not?'

'Then why aren't you fighting harder for her? She must be a very special woman to have claimed a heart long thought dead by one and all in the magical community. If you love her this much, don't lose her because my father is a very large arsehole,' Draco said softly.The arrogance that was gifted upon each and every Malfoy at birth poured out of each and every word he spoke. 'Find her and tell her how you feel.'

Severus opened his mouth to speak, then stopped and blinked at his former pupil. When the hell had the rotten little bastard ever been on his side? And when the hell had he ever cared a whit about the Muggles? Still, it was nearly exactly what Lupin had told him not all that long ago. Perhaps there was some truth to it. But how would he ever explain everything to Alasdair? And what was he to do when she rejected him for his past? He knew that she would have a difficult time caring about him when she found out what he'd done. Who he'd been. He returned his onyx gaze to the Malfoy patriarch and slowly lowered his wand.

'Best thank your son, Lucius. He has won you a reprieve from my wrath. But I will warn you here and now. Should you ever think to interfere in my life again, I will not hesitate to do my worst to you. And, should you ever go near Alasdair again,' he said in a very soft, very quiet voice. 'You will not like the consequences such an action will bring about.'

He paused and gave Lucius plenty of time to think about what he'd just said. Then he turned and gave a nod to the young man. 'Draco.'

'Good afternoon, Professor Snape. And good luck,' Draco replied. With a look at Lucius, Severus turned his back on them both. It was a blatant snub meant for the elder Malfoy, telling him without words that he found absolutely nothing to be frightened of when dealing with the blonde. As he stalked for the door, he heard a hissed intake of breath. Then there was some low muttering, which he strongly suspected was Draco telling his father to put the bloody wand away before it ended up someplace unpleasant. There was a smirk on his face as he stalked out of the manor house and Apparated away without another thought.

~*~*~*~*~

The hotel room was plain. And empty. Lonely. Severus knew for a fact that the rest of the band was gathered in one room, throwing a party of epic proportions. He could hear the loud thump of music vibrating its way down the hall to invade his forced solitude. He was sure someone on the floors above and below them had already complained to the management about the painfully loud noises. Not that he gave a shit one way or the other. It wouldn't be a band party if there weren't at least half a dozen complaints filed about the sheer bloody volume. Any other day, he'd be in the thick of it with them. But today was different. Today, he had so much on his mind.

The concert had gone off without a hitch, despite the fact that he'd used the stage to purge himself of the anger and other emotions that had been riding his back since his interesting visit to Malfoy Manor. Everyone in the band had noted, despite the fact that he'd been something of a bear since the tour had started, and had kept their distance from him the entire time they'd been playing. He'd stalked the stage in much the same manner he'd once stalked the halls of Hogwarts, the way he would be again, and pratically hissed the words of their songs into the mic he'd held tightly in one hand. When they'd finished with their last encore, he'd slammed the mic down to the ground in an uncharacteristic manner and strode from the stage in such a way that, had he been wearing his teaching robes, he would have much resembled the giant bat he'd many times been compared to.

Now he sat in silence in his hotel room, alone in a city where the women were known to throw themselves at him. Well, the women threw themselves at him in every city. But he'd learned rather quickly after the band had started its tour over a year ago that the women didn't always like or want him when they threw themselves at him. They were just looking for another notch to add to their bedpost. It didn't matter to them if he were a living, thinking, feeling human being. So long as he could put it to them well enough, they didn't care. And he'd felt that all women who followed his band from town to town were like that. Until he'd met Alasdair.

A long, lonely sigh rolled over his lips to breathe out into the room, making it feel even more pathetic than it did. He, Severus Snape, the reigning prick Rock God, was pining for a woman. For a mere Muggle wench. And she hated him. If it didn't require not feeling sorry for himself, he'd laugh. There was some kind of humor in the situation and he was sure, were Malfoy and Dumbledore here to see him, they'd be laughing their arses off.

He couldn't decide when it was he'd fallen in love with Alasdair. That first night, he'd only meant to take her like any other groupie and then go on his way. But she'd gotten under his skin. Some how. Some way. He'd been plagued by thoughts of her after their first encounter and he'd fought them, tried to shove them into a small trunk in a barely used section at the back of his brain. They'd refused to go and had pestered him all the harder. They'd pushed him to the point of madness until he'd given in and gone back to her.

He'd never regretted doing that.

Idly, Severus lifted a bottle of scotch and took a pull off it. He needed to do something to quiet his brain enough to puzzle this thing out. Thoughts were flying back and forth faster than hexes and curses at a duel. Maybe he'd been in love with her from the start. He knew he had to have been smitten with her by the time that Lupin had sprung his idiotic plan to make Severus jealous of the two of them. Never mind the fact that it had worked. He still carried fond memories of he and Alasdair playing Twister that night, though.

Then had come the baby. The news of a child had been shocking, but it had been overshadowed by the confirmation of his suspicions about her step father. The man had been beating her senseless for some time and she'd allowed it to continue, because she'd been more concerned about her mother than herself. At the time, he'd only been concerned about Alasdair and had given little thought to the idea that they had created a life between them. Now, with so much time left to him to do nothing more than think, he couldn't help but do just that.

His mind filled with the impossibility of a tiny child that they had created. That bonded them together. He'd lost something precious before he'd ever had an opportunity to decide if it was something he'd wanted. It was a given that he was not fond of children. He found them to be irresponsible and annoying to the very ends of his nerves. But there was something deep inside of him that secretly envied couples with small children. They had created something unique and special with their own kind of magic. It made him wistful, if only for a short while, for the chance to do such a thing again. But only if it was with Alasdair.

A gentle warmth filled his heart that he knew had nothing to do with the copious amounts of liquor he'd consumed. It was all to do with her. Just thinking of Alasdair filled him with.... love. There was no other word for it. He loved her as he'd never loved anything in his life. Not his former master, not his master's cause. Certainly not his former career, something at which he was disgustingly good. The truth of the matter was that Alasdair, with her sweet nature and unassuming ways, had stolen her way into his heart and made it beat with life once more. She'd given him something no one else had ever given him in his life. A sense of purpose and her undying respect. Her deep love. And he'd allowed Malfoy to convince him that she meant nothing to him. He'd pushed her away because a man who thought he was superior to her for her unmagical ways had spewed forth lies and deceit.

And Severus had believed them without fail. He called himself all kinds of a fool and drank down nearly half of the bottle. He had driven away the one thing in his life that had ever made sense. Malfoy would die a slow and steady death. He'd find a way. Perhaps a nice poison, given to him in small doses over a period of time would be the best bet. The thought put a smile on his face. His dreams of death by something silent and lethal were interrupted as Draco's words came back to him.

The boy had told him to fight for her. Severus stopped a moment and puzzled over when Draco had grown up and suddenly realized that his father was a steaming pile of horse shit best forgotten. Granted, in school he'd always been a fastidious learner and there was the entire Slytherin thing. Draco Malfoy had proven himself every inch the Slytherin over his years at Hogwarts. Who knew that the boy had a slightly romantic side to him? Perhaps the younger Malfoy had had the right of it. Severus was fairly certain that what he felt for Alasdair was much more than simply carnal lust. Not that he was an expert on such things, but the thought that perhaps the emotion that clung so stubbornly to his mind and to his heart was love. He had no prior experience with it, so he couldn't be sure. But he did know that he felt incomplete without her at his side. He'd felt that way for quite some time.

He sat up and set the bottle down, grimacing as he came ot realize what it was he had to do. He had to find her and tell her how he felt. To hell with what ever consequences there were in such a rash action. It had to be done. She might laugh in his face. She might tell him to bugger off. Or she might stop hating him long enough to tell him that she felt the same way, too. He couldn't be for certain, but it was something he knew he had to do. He was about to pull out his phone and call Remus when there was a knock on the door. With a sigh, he put the phone away and settled back into his chair before calling out curtly. 'Come.'

The door opened and Deek stepped into the room, Clarette at his side. Both looked apprehensive, as though they weren't sure they should be intruding. He wondered just when it was that his band had stopped looking upon him as merely 'the singer' and had started looking at him as a friend. Deek shut the door behind them and glanced from Clarette to where Severus sat. 'You wanted something?' Severus drawled emotionlessly.

'You've been a righteous pain in the ass since Remus got married. What the hell is going on?' Deek asked without preamble. It was one of the things that he found he enjoyed about the man. His straightforwardness was most refreshing in a world where people said what they thought you wanted to hear. 'Didn't you see Alasdair?'

'I did,' Severus replied, not ready to give them all of the details yet.

'Well?' Clarette demanded. She'd grown quite close to the other girl and Severus knew that she was as anxious about his finding her as Deek and the rest of the band. When he didn't answer straight away, she glared at him. 'What happened?'

'She told me to bugger off and that she never wants to see me again. She wants me to stay out of her life. She hates me with a passion that is unparalleled by anything I have ever before encountered,' Severus told them both softly.

'What the hell did you do to her?' Deek snarled, his voice suddenly heated with anger.

'I was a perfect bastard. I used her for sex and told her she was little more than a whore to me,' he replied with sorrow-laced honesty. He watched the utter disbelief cross both of his visitor's faces before searing anger took its place. Both opened their mouths to speak, so he held up one hand to stall their words. 'It was not until all was said and done, and Alasdair had run from me, that I found out that what I had been told about her was a lie. By then, it was too late to undo the damage wrought.'

'Its never too late, Severus. Not if you love her,' Clarette said gently, moving forward to kneel down beside his chair. 'You have to find her and set things straight.'

'I know this,' he sighed and looked away. Her hand covered his, a gentle pressure that was meant to reassure. Grudgingly, he turned his gaze back to hers and saw the most amazing thing in her eyes. She was smiling and there was such a look of caring there that he had to wonder if he'd had more to drink than he'd thought.

'I know she loves you, Severus. I could see it in the way she looked at you and it was in the tone of her voice when she spoke of you,' Clarette told him in a soft voice. 'No matter what she said the last time. She loves you. Most people say stupid things in the heat of anger and I'm sure that Al's no different. Don't let her get away from you. You'll regret it every day of your life. And so will she.'

'I am not now, nor have I ever been, a simple man. Those things that might come easily to another do not come so easily to me. I can draw up anger and disgust on a whim, but I am unable to release other, less destructive emotions,' he told them both in a quiet voice. 'At this moment, Alasdair hates me and has fled from my life. I have no clue as to how to find her. Even if I did, I would not know what to say to her. Or how. And, after my less than wonderful treatment of her, it is no less than I deserve.'

'Severus...' Deek began, but the dark man cut him short with a motion of his hand.

'No, Deek. Do not defend me in this. I know precisely what kind of man I am. I have been angry and bitter much of my life. There is little that can change that now. If Alasdair taught me nothing else, she taught me that I have spent too much time hating life and all those around me if I cannot even fathom the light when it comes to me. Alasdair was that light and I put her out as if she were little more than a candle. I do not deserve her love or forgiveness.'

Silence filled the room for some time, Severus not looking at his two guests. He merely stared moodily at the gray screen of the television, recalling a time when it would have held his interest. It did no such thing now. He was thankful to Malfoy for one thing and one thing only. The blonde had opened his eyes and showed him just what kind of a jackass he'd been. Lucius had made Severus realize exactly what Alasdair meant to him. What he felt for her. He would, at the very least, have those warm feelings and memories of her to sustain him in the long and lonely days to come.

When he finally looked at Deek and Clarette, it was to see deep sorrow on each of their faces. Tears had gathered in her eyes and were threatening to trickle down over her cheeks. Severus managed a faint smile and stood. 'Do not shed useless tears for me, Clarette. I have not given up on Alasdair. There are one or two individuals that I can speak to about her. Perhaps, if I go to her and beg, she will forgive me.'

'You won't need to beg, Severus. Al will forgive you,' Clarette assured him with a soft smile. 'You just have to find her.'

'I am... shocked and amazed that the two of you would actually care about me. I know just how much of a bastard I am. The faith you have in me is overwhelming. The least I can do to repay that is find Alasdair and ask her forgiveness,' he told them, his voice now sounding much more like it normally did. There was a certain cadence to his speech and a look to his face that showed his deep determination. An aura of acceptance had wrapped itself around him. His shoulders were once more straight and his posture filled with confidence. He turned to look at them both and found that the rest of the band had joined them. He wondered how they'd managed to sneak in unannounced, but it didn't matter. He had important information to give them and it was good they were there.

'We all care, dude,' Turlough told him, nodding his head as if that was all that needed to be said. 'You're family, whether you like it or not. So tell me you're going to go find that woman of yours and chain her to your side.'

'In good time, Turlough,' he nodded, a smirk curling up the corner of his lips while his eyes glittered with something none of them had seen in the twin obsidian orbs for some time now. Fierce determination radiated off him in thick waves. 'For now, I have something to tell all of you.'

He motioned to the rest of the band to find seats. The three of them moved to find a place to sit while Deek settled onto a corner of the bed and dragged Clarette into his lap. Once all of them were comfortable, he gave them all a look and assumed the hard persona that they were all used to. 'I have decided, after this tour concludes, that I will step down as the reigning bastard of Rock 'n' Roll. I will return to the position I was in before taking up with you rowdy lot.'

'You're quitting?' Fallon asked, his voice filled with disbelief. Severus nodded. 'Why?'

'Because this life isn't suited to me any more than my old one,' he replied easily. He could see that now, having spent time with groupies and time with Alasdair. He might enjoy the singing, but he didn't care for touring and the expectations of the crowd that came with doing such a thing. Frankly, he was tired and he'd had enough. Dumbledore had merely given him a swift kick up the backside and shown him where it was he belonged and where he wanted to be. 'But my old one is where I belong.'

'You're going to give it all up?' Deek eyed him speculatively. Severus glanced at him and gave a short, terse nod of his head. The blonde drum god smiled back in understanding. 'She's a hell of a woman, isn't she?' he asked softly.

'She is and she deserves so much better than I have to offer her,' he replied softly, then looked to the rest of the band. 'I know you will go on to a long and healthy career, whether I sing for you or not. I wish you all the best of luck. I know you will be most successful, no matter what it is you plan on doing.'

'You'll always have a place with us,' Turlough told him, his voice was full of conviction. The rest of the band nodded in agreement. Severus managed a slight smile for them.

'Thank you. That means quite a deal to me,' he told them, then motioned to the door. 'Now go back to your party and enjoy yourselves. Do not concern yourself with sad old men such as myself. I have plans to make. I have a woman to find and reclaim as my own. I cannot do such things with the lot of you watching over my shoulder.'

The five of them smirked at him a moment, then got up and moved for the door. They let themselves out, Deek the last one. He stopped and turned in the doorway and pinned Severus with a look. 'Dude, if you don't go find Al and make this all up to her, I'm going to take your wand and shove it straight up your backside,' he told the dark man with no small amount of conviction in his words.

Severus did something he never did with anyone. He blinked in surprise at his drummer.

Deek chuckled. 'I've known all along. My cousin went to Hogwarts. She told me all about the arrogant Severus Snape. I have to say I'm not disappointed in her stories. You're every thing that she's ever said and more.'

With that proclamation left hanging in the air between them, Deek turned and left the room, making sure to pull the door shut behind him.

~*~*~*~*~

The Black Lake was peaceful and serene, barely a ripple stirring the water's surface. With a sigh, Alasdair settled down on a patch of dry grass near the edge. She wished that she felt even an ounce of the calm that affected the large body of water. Though she appeared calm on the outside, she was a roiling mass of nerves and emotions on the inside. So much had been going through her mind in the days that had passed since the conclusion of her mother's wedding. It was, for the most part, a distraction she didn't want to be forced to contend with. She was still trying to find a way to fit in here at Hogwarts and was, she felt, failing miserably at it.

The students still whispered about her when ever she had to mingle with them. That only happened mostly at meals, but there were other occasions that cropped up. It was always an uncomfortable time for her, having to sit through their whispering, pointing and staring. She knew that both Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall did the best they could to keep the children in line, but they couldn't police everyone's actions every day and night. After the fight with Severus, his callous and cruel treatment of her when he'd used his magic on her as if she were little more than a pile of rages, which was followed quickly by the fight with her mother, she'd begun to understand more and more that she just didn't belong where she was.

She felt a some of the peace that enveloped this area of the lake wash over her and she sighed. The students had gone into Hogsmeade for the day under the watchful eye of Minerva and a few of the other teachers on staff. Those students who weren't allowed to go into the village were on the other side of the castle, enjoying the beauty of the day. Al was glad, because it left her alone here by the lake. She needed some time to herself so that she could think over the things that were running in her head.

The sound of the water lapping against the shore soothed her battered senses and she felt a pang of loneliness and jealousy. She hadn't talked to her mother since their argument that day after she'd married Remus and she was starting to understand just what she'd done. She was sure her mother no longer wished to speak to her because she'd been stupid. She'd known Remus longer than her mother had, yet she'd immediately jumped to the wrong conclusion the moment she'd heard about his condition. She knew that Aletha hadn't yet forgiven her for that.

Remus, it seemed, didn't share the same anger that her mother did. He'd sent her several owls over the course of the handful of weeks that had passed since the wedding. Each letter that had come had told her that the two of them were doing well. He'd politely asked after her health and he'd wanted to know what she thought of Hogwarts and if she were enjoying her position working for Dumbledore. Al had answered a couple of them, but had soon lost the desire to do so. Each time she thought of how kind Remus had been to her even though she was sure he knew what she'd argued with her mother about, she felt a shaft of self-loathing run through her. She'd also felt a deep and unrelenting jealousy.

Remus loved her mother. Aletha loved him. It didn't matter to her what he was or what he could do. It didn't matter to him that she couldn't do some of the same things he could. All that mattered was that they cared deeply for one another. She didn't even have that. If what she was told was to be believed, Severus both hated and loved her. He couldn't stand her because she was nothing in comparison to him. He could use magic and she couldn't even find her way around the school without help. And he'd never wanted their child. She felt stupid and unwanted, unloved and forgotten.

Staring out over the glass-like surface of the lake, Alasdair knew what it was she had to do. She had to leave all of this behind and start over. There was no way she could remain at Hogwarts and not feel as she did. Out of place and unnecessary. She knew this would require talking to Dumbledore. Severus had brought her to England and she now understood that he hadn't flown her there on his private jet. He wasn't there to take her back, so she knew she'd have to rely on Professor Dumbledore to get her home. She had no money and no passport, which meant she would be unable to purchase a ticket back to the United States.

Al frowned and stifled a sob. She didn't really want to go back. She truly liked where she was at. But she saw no recourse. The students made her feel out of place. The subjects taught and the people who taught them made her feel out of place. Everything seemed to make her feel out of place. It didn't matter that much of the staff had treated her with the utmost dignity. It didn't matter that the kindness of Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall was more than she had ever experienced. She just didn't think she really belonged there.

Drawing her knees up to her chest, Al settled her head on them and closed her eyes. There was an ache in her heart that didn't seem to let up, no matter what she told herself or what she did to try and alleviate it. She was never going to truly be over Severus, no matter what came to her in the future. Sighing, she decided that sitting there would do her no good. She needed to go see the Headmaster now and be done with it. The sooner she got it over with, the sooner she could start her life over.

Just as she was working at getting to her feet, a hand reached out and curled around her arm. It helped her into a standing position. When Al looked over her shoulder, it was to find that Neville stood next to her. There was a gentle smile on his face that she'd come to associate with him. Neville was always smiling for her and always kind. He'd become something of a fast friend to her during her time at the castle and she cherished that. Of all those in the castle, Neville could always bring a smile to her face. Even when she didn't want to smile. 'Hello, Neville,' she greeted him with her lips tilted up in a half smile, genuinely glad to see him.

'Good afternoon, Alasdair. How are you today?' he asked her, watching as she dusted the grass and dirt from her jeans. She gave him a partial shrug of one shoulder. He nodded. 'I kind of figured as much. But I had to ask. Just in case,' he smiled. It was the smile of a sweet young man. He fell silent and turned to look at the lake, allowing her a moment or two to gather her thoughts to her. Almost as if he knew the exact moment when she was ready to talk, he turned back to her just as she was going to open her mouth and speak. 'Its very peaceful out here. I've always liked the lake. I used to come out here and study when I was a student here.'

'What was it like?' she asked, unable to help herself. In all the time she'd been at the school, working for Professor Dumbledore, she hadn't been able to help herself in slipping into day dreams about what it must be like to be one of the special children and staff members that came here to learn and teach. 'Learning how to use magic and all. Studying subjects only small children dream of in their fantasies. It must have been so.... cool,' she finished lamely, blushing at her choice of words. It seemed so stupid to put it that way.

He shook his head, his smile suddenly full of mirth. 'It was both a good time and a bad time,' he told her. She watched as his eyes took on a far away look and she knew he was recalling those days.

'How do you mean?' the curiosity in her voice was plain to hear. He took her hand and pulled her after him as he started walking along the shore of the lake. She went willingly, knowing that he would tell her what she wanted to know and that he would never hurt her. She realized with a start that she could trust Neville like she'd never been able to trust almost anyone else.

They were a good fifty feet from where she'd been standing before he spoke again. He stopped and turned toward the lake. 'I was something of a nerd when I attended school here. Draco Malfoy was in the same year and he was a constant pain in my arse. The biggest bully, he was. At least, that was when he had Crabbe and Goyle to back him.'

'Draco Malfoy? Is he any relation to a tall, arrogant, blonde asshole? Someone named.... ' she asked, searching her brain for the one time when she knew Severus had introduced them. 'Lucius?'

'Draco's father. After the war, though, Draco changed. Actually, it would seem he changed before the war, though none of us were the wiser to it. His stance and the side he chose were kept hush-hush until after it was all said and done, on Dumbledore's orders,' Neville told her, then turned to glance at her. He could see the hurt expression in her eyes and reached out to touch her face. 'I see you've met him. Hateful one, that.'

'Yes, he is,' she agreed softly, her mind turning over her last encounter with the man.

'Look, I won't pry,' he began, giving her a knowing look. She liked that he'd been considerate of her feelings. It meant so much to her that he respected her enough to let her tell him what had happened when she was ready for it. 'But I can tell you that whatever Lucius Malfoy told you was an out and out lie. There isn't an honest bone in that man's body. Don't trust anything he tells you.'

Al said nothing about that. Instead, she turned the conversation back to the original topic. 'What war?'

'The war with.... Voldemort,' Neville replied, pausing long enough to make Al believe that it had been something of a trial for him to say it. She gave him a puzzled look and received a sheepish grin for her efforts. 'Sorry, I keep forgetting. He was a Dark Wizard. He was intent on taking control of the magical world and wiping out those who could do magic but came from non-magical parents. He called them Mudbloods. My friend Hermione, you met her, came from a non-magical family. The war was to save people like her. Well, and all of us, too.'

'He sounds like a terrible man,' Al commented.

'He was. There was a constant threat over our heads while I was in school. Harry,' he paused and glanced at her. 'You've met him, too. Harry was prophesized to defeat Voldemort. Ron and Hermione helped. We all were in the same House while we were at school. All in the same year. We were all friends. The three of them got into so much trouble and came out of it without too much harm. Harry more than the others. Alot of the kids at Hogwarts wondered all the time if Harry was that good or that lucky or that bad. We spent alot of time with one another and they became family. Every one in each of the Houses did.'

She nodded. That made sense. She'd already learned that Hogwarts was something like a boarding school. And she knew that there were some students who were felt they were far superior to the others. She imagined Neville had been one of those who'd likely been teased more than he hadn't been.

'We all had classes with one another and we had teachers we liked and disliked. And every one of us was terrorized by Professor Snape. The man is brilliant. He's the best Potions Master in the world, but he was always such a frightening and difficult teacher to deal with. He used to scare me like no one else did,' he explained, then gave her that chagrinned look again. 'With exception of my grandmother, that is.'

'She was a harridan?' Al couldn't help but smile.

'You have no idea,' Neville chuckled. 'We all thought that Professor Snape was a traitor. That he'd been a loyal Death Eater up until the end. But we found out that he was spying for the Order. He was risking his life to provide information to the Light so that Voldemort could be defeated. The man is a hero, but most of the magical community treats him like he's some kind of disease. I'm glad to see that he's gotten some acknowledgement as a musician. He deserves it.'

The two of them fell to silence, both looking out over the lake. Al took the time to digest all she'd been told. There was too much in her head to make sense of it all and, to be honest, she didn't want to consider what it meant if Lucius Malfoy was a liar. That would make her feel worse than if he'd been telling her the truth. She also felt that Neville wanted quiet for a while. He seemed to be gearing himself up and she couldn't imagine what it was.

When he spoke again, his voice shattered the peace that had enveloped them and she felt herself jump. 'I like you, Alasdair. You don't judge me because I'm awkward or anything. You accept me for who I am,' he told her without preamble. She smiled at him, opened her mouth to speak. He held his hand up, letting her know he wasn't done yet. She closed her mouth and indicated he should go on.

'I know you feel like an outsider here, Alasdair. I can appreciate how that must make you feel. I also know you've been considering leaving us. I wish you wouldn't. The staff likes you and, I can tell you with all honesty, that Dumbledore has never been so prompt to staff meetings in all the time I've been teaching potions as he's been since you came to work as his secretary. It would be a shame if you were to leave, Alasdair.'

'I don't belong here, Neville. The students talk about me constantly. That can't be good when they're trying to learn,' she gave him a pleading look. 'I feel so out of place and.... I just don't want to be here where I'm so obviously....'

'Alasdair,' he sighed, cutting off her words. She looked at him. His face was so serious. 'I know you're in love with Professor Snape. I know that something happened between the two of you. I have to guess that you're here because he doesn't want you anymore.'

Her face fell into the familiar lines of pain, Neville frowned and smacked his palm to his forehead. 'That isn't what I meant, Al. I mean, it wasn't supposed to come out like that. All I know is that I don't like to see you so sad. And I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay with us. With me.'

'Neville,' she shook her head, ready to explain to him why she couldn't stay. He took her hands in his and looked her right in the eye. There was such a look in his eyes, filled with so much, that she fell to silence and merely stared up at him sadly.

'Alasdair, I know I could never take the place of Professor Snape. And I know you don't love me,' he began and she felt panic well up within her. She tried to pull her hands from his, but his grip tightened and he wouldn't let her back away. 'You like me, though. I know you do. I wouldn't expect you to be anything more than my friend. Maybe, in time, you'd come to care for me as something more than a friend.'

'Neville,' she said again, her voice soft and full of something pained.

'Please don't say no. Not yet. Let me ask. Alasdair, would you marry me? I promise I'll be true and faithful. I'll take care of you. You won't want for anything. I don't need an answer now. Think it over. Stay here and continue on as Dumbledore's secretary. You can wait until the end of term to tell me your decision. Please don't dismiss me out of hat. Just think about it.'

Alasdair gaped at him, unable to speak for several long moments. There was such a hopeful look on his face and, in it, she saw his innocence and youth. He might have been involved in a war, but she could see that it hadn't touched his soul. It hadn't tainted who he was. She could do worse than someone like Neville. He would be tender with her. He would treat her with respect. Perhaps it wasn't such a strange idea after all.

Would it be so bad, married to someone like Neville? He already knew where her heart was and he was still willing to take her to wife. She might some day grow to love him. There were worse fates in the world. Sighing, she looked at him. 'I'll think on it. I promise.'

'That's all I ask,' he smiled at her, then leaned down and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

end chapter twenty seven.
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first and foremost, many thanks to my group of supporters. there are too many to name and they all know who they are. you guys are wonderful and i love you all very much. you keep me going. much love and huggles coming at you. also, extra special thanks to my kitty cat and to onyx for being so much more than mere friends. you give me so much and ask for nothing in return.

if you find that you like this and are feeling generous, a review would be nice. you don't have to, but we authors do like to know when someone enjoys our efforts.

and finally, thanks to the following...

to sheedy: i'm so glad you've enjoyed it. i hope you like this chapter, too.

to Shiva: yes, Severus has effed up badly. hopefully, the encounter with Lucius didn't disappoint you. and what Dumbledore has going on will be revealed eventually. i'm so glad you liked the wedding and the dresses. i actually take some time coming up with clothes like that when its very important. i could almost envision what the ladies would wear as i was writing that bit out. i'm so glad you liked that. and yes, it was funny when he interrupted the beauty of the moment to ask where the bar was. leave it to Severus to do something like that.

to l'etje: two wows? you thought it was that good and amazing and fantastic on top? i must be doing something right. i think i like where those two have steered me in terms of their relationship. from this story's context, i think she was just what he needed to help restore some of his faith in humanity. or at least to let him know that not all women were after him so they could claim him as a notch on their bedpost. i hope you like this chapter, too.

to star: you laughed and cried? goodness, that says something. thanks for the vote of confidence. i hope you like this one, as well.