Feeling

Feeling: Chapter Two





A wave of multiple conversations greeted Hermione when she stepped into the Great Hall the next morning. Her head was hanging low and her face was flushed, yet her expression was that of a person who didn\'t sleep for days. She made her way to the Griffindor table and sat down next to her friends. Harry looked from his conversation with Ron and smiled at her.



“Good morning Hermione. Are you alright? You look tired.”



She looked up startled.



“Oh, good morning Harry. Don\'t worry about me, I just haven\'t been able to sleep yesterday.”



Harry looked at her with a sympathetic look, then turned back to Ron, who mumbled a “Hello, Hermione,” then resumed the conversation with Harry.



She said a distracted “Hi!” back, then turned back to her thoughts of the night before. What Lucius said to her still hunted her, as it did for the rest of the night after he left. And more importantly what she said to him. She flushed a deeper shade of red as she recalled how she clung to him in the moment of confession.



But what made her toss and turn was the thought of him getting hurt. Now when she finally realized, just how much he means to her, she wouldn\'t be able to see him injured. She just hoped he was alright.



The noise of flapping wings snapped her out of her worries. She looked up and right into the face of a school owl, who looked slightly irritated at having to wait. She smiled at the owl, untied her post and gave it some bacon. The owl gave a hoot and flew away. Hermione smiled after it then searched trough the letters.



The first was from her parents. It was a letter filled with their joy about the Caribbean sea. The second was an invite to the Weasley home for Christmas. She wasn\'t quite sure she was going this year. She just didn\'t feel right going there because she didn\'t like Ron anymore and his mother would try to get them together. And it made her feel awful to watch how Ron tries to get her attention. So this is the perfect time to avoid it.



Feeling worse then before, she opened the third letter. Inside laid a short message.











Miss Granger,



I must say I am very glad you found that letter, because it saved a lot of lives. But I find it very curious that you found it while patrolling the grounds, yet the letter did not have a wet spot on it. And I checked for spells. It had none. I\'m going to leave this topic for now, but it worries me. Please be careful.



Prof. Albus Dumbledore











She bit her lip and glanced at the head table. Professor Dumbledore was looking at her with a worried gaze. The sparkles in his eyes were gone. She smiled, albeit uncertainly and turned back to her final letter. As soon as she saw the writing she blushed, then smiled. She carefully opened it, caressing the parchment while she read it.











Dear Hermione,



Firstly, I would like to inform you that this letter is unreadable for anyone but you, yet I would like you to burn it after you read it just in case someone broke the spell. Secondly, I would like to say I am very happy you gave my letter to the headmaster like I asked of you. But, I have written for another reason.



It pains me to write this, but I\'m afraid I won\'t be able to meet you for a month or so. I was given a mission that I cannot refuse if I wish to see another day. Please do not worry about me as I am sure you will. I will keep your love close to my heart so it keeps me going. I swear I will return to you. I will write as soon as I get back to the manor.



With love,



Lucius



P.S.: Please do not try to contact me.











Her eyes were filled with worry as she lowered the letter. Although he said he would be fine and she shouldn\'t worry, it made her worry more. What made her even more upset, was the thought of not seeing him for a month.



Or more.



It made her heart ache. She got up, even though she did not eat breakfast, and left for the nearest bathroom, the letter still in her hand. She opened one of the stalls and stepped in. after she locked the door and put a silencing spell on it, she turned back to the letter. After she read it three more times she finally burned it. She watched as the words slowly disappeared and turned into ash, now nothing more then a memory in her mind. She lowered the ash into the toilet and flushed. After she took of the silencing spell, she left the stall and the bathroom, her thoughts on everything that happened ever since this thing with Lucius started.



She gave a start when a hand landed on her shoulder. She looked into the blue eyes of Ron, who smiled at her shyly, and removed his hand.



“Hey what\'s wrong?”



She gave him a small smile.



“I already told Harry that I couldn\'t sleep. Haven\'t you been listening?”



He gave sheepish smile and scratched his head. She rolled her eyes at him and went to class, Ron following her.



So her days continued in a similar pattern. She would go to breakfast, hardly eat anything at all, and spend the rest of the day in classes or the library. After two weeks she looked really pale and sick so her friends forced her to go to the infirmary, where she got a scolding to last her a year. Madam Pomfrey forced her to stay the next week in the hospital wing. On the second day the headmaster visited her.



She couldn\'t bare to look him in the eye, because she knew the concern was there. He took a seat next to her hospital bed and leaned forward.



“Miss Granger, ever since you brought me that letter you\'ve been acting strangely. Is there something you wish to tell me?”



She slowly looked up, carefully avoiding his eyes in fear of him reading her mind.



“Sir there is nothing to tell. Honestly. I\'m just tired lately. And I cannot sleep. But otherwise I\'m fine.”



After her response everything went quiet. He was studying her with a slightly worried gaze. But then he sighed and stood up. Even though he could see she was nervous he didn\'t press further. Patting her hand, he gave her a smile and bid her goodbye. She stared after him, relieved he didn\'t question her further. The reason she was like this, was her worry for Lucius. He hasn\'t written yet and it has been almost a month. She was getting more worried each and every day. And she couldn\'t even contact him to see if he was OK.



She pulled her covers closer and hugged herself, as if the gesture would make it better. Her heart was pounding in her chest and her eyes stung from the tears she couldn\'t release. Her eyes squeezed shut as she fought the panic attack, that was so close to overtaking her. What if he was dead? What if he was dying? And the most terrifying question: What if he didn\'t write because this was all a joke? What if he didn\'t love her? What if he is laughing at her foolishness this very moment?



The mere thought of him despising her, broke the last of her restrains. She grabbed her wand and closed the curtains around her then put up a silencing spell. As soon as the spells were cast she let loose a painful cry. Tears were sliding down her cheeks and onto the sheets, but she didn\'t care.



She needed him.



Her cries quieted after nearly two hours, when she was to tired to stay awake. Yet even in her sleep she clung to her pillow, searching him in her sleep.











Her week in the Hospital Wing ended with Madam Pomfrey reminding her not to miss a meal. After giving her a few potions for her sleep she shooed Hermione out.



“And I better not see you in here again Miss Granger!”



So Hermione slowly went trough the empty hallways, her target the Griffindor common room. She was aware that classes already started, but she decided to skip the morning ones. Instead she finished the last of her assignments. Madam Pomfrey didn\'t let her work as much as she would\'ve liked too.



After a few hours of doing her homework she made her way to the Great Hall. As soon as she stepped inside she heard two yells of: “Hermione!” Ron and Harry ran towards her and hugged her. Ron released her with a blush, while Harry smiled at her.



“I can see you are feeling better. Finally managed to sleep trough the night?” She smiled at him.



“Yes I did. I had the best nights this weekend.” A lie. Her best nights were with Lucius. But she couldn\'t exactly tell them that. She saw Ron smiling at her and she could clearly see his love for her. It made her heart ache.



“Glad you\'re feeling better \'Mione.” His blush made her feel even worse.



“Thank you Ron.” She had to look away as she saw his smile widen. She gripped her book bag tighter and started for the Griffindor table. She sat and started eating, while ignoring the greetings of other Griffindors.



Lunch didn\'t end soon enough. But after it did, she was finally able to go to her classes. It made her feel better. She lost herself in the wonder of knowledge. Her professors were happy she was back and she was happy too.



And this way she was able to avoid Ron.



After dinner she quickly did her homework and went to bed. Yet somehow she could not fall asleep no matter how much she tried. All she could think about was the feel of Lucius. The way he touched her skin, the way smiled at her as if she was the only thing that mattered. The way it felt to be one with him, the way their magic entwined. She longed to feel his arms around her, his hand caressing her hair and his lips on her skin.



Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of an owl pecking her window. Curious, she opened it and let the beautiful owl in. The owl immediately extended her leg, eager to return home. She freed the poor thing of its burden. As soon as she did the owl hooted and flew trough the window into the snowy plane. For a second she looked at the falling snow, thinking about the winter vacation that was going to start in a day. Ron and Harry were going to the Weasleys, but she was going to stay at Hogwarts. She wanted to stay in case Lucius wanted to meet her.



She looked away from the beautiful scene and finally to her letter. As soon as she saw the loopy writing of her lover, her heartbeat speed up.



With shaking hands she opened the envelope and unfolded the parchment. She looked up and around to make sure she was alone, then closed her eyes. Taking a few calming breaths she slowly opened her eyes and started reading.











Dear Hermione,



I have finally completed my mission. Don\'t worry, other then a few bruises and scratches I am fine. All the time I was there I kept thinking of you, and it has kept me going. But now, after nearly a month of not holding you in my arms, I feel as if I am about to burst from the need. I\'m afraid I cannot take this any longer. I want to see you. Can you meet me at the shack tonight at half past midnight? I will be waiting.



With Love,



Lucius



P.S.: If you would burn the letter please?











She looked up from her letter and breathed in, a happy smile founding its way on her face. She ran to the bathroom and burned the letter. After she cast a tempus charm and saw it was eleven thirty already. She quickly showered and dried her hair. After that she ran to her trunk and pulled out underwear he bought her, and a green jumper with a black skirt. After she put the clothes on, she checked her hair, put on her cloak and ran to the door. Carefully she opened it and peaked out. Seeing everyone was downstairs, she disillusioned herself and sneaked out.



The dark hallways were deserted. She stopped for just a second to admire the moonlit halls, then ran towards the exit.



She cast a warming charm on herself as she ran trough the thick layers of snow. She ran until she reached their shack. There she stopped to take a few calming breaths. She checked the time again. It was half past midnight. She opened the front door and slowly stepped inside. As she neared the door to the room she knew he was in, she got the sense of deja vu.



She stopped in front of the door and gripped the door handle. After a few heart beats she pressed down and opened the door. She was blinded by the light of the fireplace. And then she saw him. He was standing next to the window, staring at the beautiful scenery. He had a bruise right below his left eye. She couldn\'t see where else he was injured, but at the moment she found she did not care.



He was here.



She whispered his name and he turned around, finally seeing her. She ran to him and flung her arms around him, pressing herself to him tightly. He embraced her back and buried his nose into her neck, once again taking in her scent. He caressed her hair and pulled her to him tighter. She rested in his arms, her worries leaving her.



“You have no idea how much you made me worry. Oh god I missed you so much.”



He parted from her and kissed her lips. After a few moments of them just innocently kissing, he finally found the will to part from her.



“I missed you too. I love you.”



She blushed.



“I love you too.”



He smiled at her and reached for her cloak. After he pulled it off, the rest of her clothes followed. She in return undressed him and soon they were lying on the bed, the sheets covering their forms as they fell asleep in each others arms.



Many hours later the only source of light was from the moonlight. It caressed their entwined forms with its beams of light, making them seem almost angel-like.



It truly was a breathtaking sight.