Empty souls

Chapter 2. – Collecting themselves.





Already has passed a month before the funeral of the brave warriors from the last battle, and the normal things weren’t normal anymore... not without the family and friends that were now lost. The jokes, the games, the homework, the songs, the parties, the celebrations, the talks, all that had to be with the loved ones are now gone. The quidditch games in Hogwarts as well, now are something unbearable to think even. The streets in Hogsmade now are in process of rebuilt. Hogwarts keep the pace for the students left. Headmistress Macgonagall is at the head of the great school, arrenging the process of the rest of the kids in there.





Sadly to say that, as the news of a few people missing, the parents of the survivors students, took away their children to home. For an innane reason, the parents believed that Hogwarts was no longer safe. To much had happened there. That way, in the castle weren’t more than fifty-eight students. The staff agreed that no matter if there were just two kids left, they will keep teaching.





The ministry of magic and the wisengamot were reluctant as to keep Hogwarts open. In the end, the argument of the staff and some parents as well a few aurors and employees of the ministry had a common agreement. Although, the precautions were doubled to regard the kids safer in the school, and forbid any weekend in Hogsmade until the ministry could track the remained death-eaters. It seemed that the war was not over yet.





The magical comunity was actualy keeping a battle, even taht Voldemort was dead for good.





The muggles weren’t luckiest, because few of them, the week after the battle, were found dead. At least they were found.





That’s why a man –not boy anymore- in the burrow, was having difficulties with his decisions. A man with green eyes that lost the sparkle that once reigned for all the world to see. Now these eyes were no longer full of life, but despair. The situation took a toll on him and can’t bear to breath without thinking unworth to do just that. He has no longer meals, because he doesn’t eat, unless Ginny keep an eye on him. Stubborn as she is, as well as Harry, brought them constant fights, sometimes that ended in his acceptance, sometimes that ended in her acceptance... Sometimes that endedin horribles reprimands from Remus or Molly, that were really worried for him. Even the twins were there scolding Harry for not eat. Eventually he submited to the need, and that day was because Ginny, fed up by his reluctantof get food in his grumbling stomach, argued: ‘¿What would Hermione think if she find out that you left yourself starving to death?’. In that instant, the firm decision of finding Hermione, brought him back from his mourning, from his personal shadow.





‘¿What would Hermione think?’ repeat Harry in his mind over and over again until it became almost like a mantra, before replace it only with one single word: ‘Hermione’.





‘¿How selfish I am?’ thought Harry while they were seated in the kitchen of the burrow, exactly a month from the funeral. He was giving discretly glances at the face of Molly Weasley serving supper at the twins, Angelina, Kate, Bill, Fleur, Ginny, Luna, Neville and him. Percy got married and took off to the states with his wife Penelope Clearwater. When he left, didn’t pay a simple good bye, and wasn’t there at the funeral. He himself was baned from the Weasley family. Now, as adoptive son of the Weasley’s, He swore to protect all and everyone of the people that extended their hands to him. He wasn’t about to abandoned the search for Hermione, but he almost forgot that that Ginny was his fiancé.





Luna and Neville now lived in Longbottom manor. Bill and Fleur decided that was best to remain in the burrow, while the twins with their respective girlfriends goes to their respectives flats in London.





Molly was reciving, once in a month, a boarding-house as compensation for the death of Arthur. It was a hundred galleons for month, and Molly, with tears in her eyes, said sadly: ‘That will never be enough; Arthur worth all the galleons put together in the world and never will get in to the real price’. Then Harry, Bill, Fred and George decided to take care of the issue, and between the four of them sustain the expenditure of the burrow.





“Hope that some of that was left for us” said a voice that came from the backyard door. Everyone turned to see Remus and Tonks get in the kitchen. Harry inmediatly stood up and gave Remus a big hug. The last he saw them was three days ago and everytime they came, no word of the whereabouts of Hermione was heard.





“Sure, sure” said Molly hurriedly getting ready two other places for the newcomers. “Take a seat, I will give you onion soup in a moment”.





Harry wasted no time.





“¿Anything of Hermione?” He asked. Remus grimaced, avert his eyes to glance at the rest of the presents, that were looking intently at them, and seeingHarry directly in the eyes, answered:





“I’m afraid not”. Harry lowered his gaze at the floor, his hands in a tight fists. “Harry, maybe we haven’t news of Hermione, but if you see the positive part, you’ll find out that is a good sign”.





“¿How could be a good sign?”. Harry shook his head, still glaring at the floor. Then looked up directly at the eyes of Remus, defiantly “Tell me”.





“Because” said Remus. He wasn’t scared at the glare of Harry’s eyes, but remained calm. “that means that the death-eaters don’t know as well as all of us”





“I think that it’s time to put an advertisment in the Prophet” said Ginny exasperated. “We’ve been sending owls but everytime they’re back with the mail sealed. I can’t bare this anymore” at the last word left her lips she was cracking. More for the sanity of Harry than for the care of her friend.





“You know very well that we can not do that, Ginny.” Argued Tonks, trying to pacified the red-head witch.





“Tonks is right” intervened Remus, “We’ll alert them of her dessapereance if we do it. And then she’ll be in danger, because the death-eaters will not rest until find her just to get Harry... We need to be patients, or else everything will be spoiled”.





After that, silence fell upon them. Molly sensing that it wasn’t sane said:





“Now, now... Remus and Tonks, it’s time to eat. Ginny, Luna... help me washing the dishes. I already have a cake, a chocolate cake, I must say, that taste delicious”.





“As always, Molly”.





An hour later, Neville and Luna bid them good night and departed to Longbottom manor. Ginny, sad as she was, left to her room, giving Harry a light peek on his lips. The twins and their girlfriends left too and Bill, Fleur, Molly and Tonks seated in the parlor, leaving Remus and Harry alone in the kitchen. Once the door closed, Harry put a strong silencing charm and an impertubable charm and begun to talk. Remus just frown at seeing this. He saw it coming.





“Ok, Remus” said Harry in a tone that left more than clear that there is no longer a patient Harry. “Ginny is right, we need to do something. Maybe not an advertisment, but alert other peoplethat may could find her. I’m really worried by this, because there would be something that we don’t know like ‘why she left’”.





“First of all, Harry” said Remus as calmly as posible. “You need to cool off. Don’t let your anger and anguish get the better of you. We need to have clear heads to find her. We had had already this conversation, what- a hundred times? And everytime I told you the same: be patient.”





“No, I’m not going to be patient anymore. First thing in the morning will be go out myself searching for her. I’m not going to give up.”





“I’m not saying that, Harry. You know very well that Lucius Malfoy is still out there.”





“I’ll bring with me a few aurors. It’s the least they can do”.





Remus, taking a deep breath said:





“Tell me, Harry, ¿Where are you going to begin? You yourself gave us the posible locations. We already search all Great Britain and Ireland... Merlin, Harry! Even Hagrid is out there looking. We aren’t giving up. And you need to go on.” Now Remus was angry “¿Did you see the face of Ginny?” Harry looked in the eyes of Remus, the angry behind them was now clouded by sadness, “You are so troubled for Hermione’s disappearance, that you’re forgetting that you will marry that girl that is in love with you that is begging for the life of Hermione, even at the cost of her own wedding, just for your peace of mind... just because it’s the last strain that mantaine the union of both of your lifes. She’s devasted too, Harry, she lost not only his father, but two of her brothers too...” Remus frowned when Harry diverted his stare at everywhere but him. “Something is bothering you, isn’t it? You never can lie to me. I know you.” When he recived silence for answer, Remus stood up and walked to the door to join the rest in the parlor.





“It’s just...” Remus stoped at hear Harry’s voice before reach the handle of the kitchen door, two inches close.





Turning aroud, Remus found Harry paled than normal, looking at him with downcast eyes.





“You’re right, Remus... I can’t lie to you. Yes, there’s something that bothers me. And I’m going to reveal it to you, and only you... but you need to swear to me that not a living soul will know, no matter what. You’ll give me your word or else I will not say a thing.





Remus, puzzled, took his time rememberingthat now, in absence of Sirius, it is his burden to take care of Harry and help him and hear him whenever he needs.





“I will need to tell this to Tonks” Remus saw a little regret in Harry’s eyes and shook his head. “You know that she’s my wife and can’t hide something to her. But I give my word that she won’t say a single thing”





Harry seemed to think it. He didn’t like the agreement, but knew that it was time, because it was something that threat to tear him apart.





“Then, I have your word”.



“Absolutely”.





“Ron and Hermione were going to get married. He proposed to her four months before the battle. I proposed to Ginny two months after them. But... you know why I did it?” Remus shook his head “Because I couldn’t dissapoint Ginny... because despite that I told her to remain as far as possible, she did not obeyed and stood by my side, even in the battle, she cared for me... because it was the right thing to do. I love her, Remus, but...” Harry bit his lower lip, almost at the point of bleeding. “My deepest love is not for her” Remus was now really puzzled, and minute by minute, his eyes grew wide. Nothing would prepared him to hear what was about to hear. “Too late I realised that I love Hermione... more than a friend... more than anything in this world. I’m not ashamed, I love her and is deep and genuine... Now I’m engaged and can’t brake Ginny’s heart.”





“Then, why did you do it?”





“Because Ron and Hermione were already engaged and happy... I-I wouln’t stand between them. The only reasonable thing for me to do was wished them the best and go on. I’m not ashamed of what I feel , but what I’ve done... and I can’t turn back down.”





“¿Are you waiting then for Hermione to come back to brake your engagement?”.





“No.”





“Then, why are you postponing the wedding?”.





“It was Ginny’s idea.” Breathing deeply said the next, looking the eyes of Remus. “She said that it’ll be posponed until Hermione get back. I’m afraid that now is regretting it”.





Both men went silent. Non of them knew what to say.





“Then, marry her. You said yourself that you can’t turn back. I can tell that Ginny is not herself anymore”.





“Remus, I don’t know anymore”.





“¿Are you going to back off?”





“No.”





“Then begin to arrenge everything. You really need to go on. I know that Ron wouldn’t blame you. Hermione is a sweet and intelligent girl, though I would like to remember why at the moment... Anyway, if you’re not going to cancel the wedding, I suggest to go on. Meanwhile, we’ll no rest until find Hermione.”











Miles and miles away from there, a witch was having difficulties in her sleep. There were night in which the thought of her friends were hunting her like a curse, overcoat the thought of Harry.





Since she arrived in Lyon, few hours via floo, after get away from the burrow, Hermione found a simple hotel and a week and a half later, found a simple flat, that was settled with two rooms, a kitchen, a bathroom and a small parlor.





Throughout the years, Hermione made an account in a muggle bank where she left part of her money. Her parents agreed with this and they contributed as an emergency count in case something happened to them. Unfortunately, it became real. The day before the battel, with cold heart, finished the arrangements of the money of her parents and her own account.





Her house no longer existed. In the attack, the death-eaters reduced the three story house to ashes. The house where she and her parents were happy, where she grew up with the love of Roger and Jane Granger, it was gone forever.





At first, when she arrived in Lyon, she was scared. ’¡How in the world I would manage to go on?’... That question reverberated in her head with a heavy guilt. She couldn’t face the Weasley family... She was the reason that Ron is dead. They would never forgive her and then they’ll hate her and reject her... Before that could happen, she shunned from there, and decide to never come back. To change her name... to change her colour hair, her eye’s colour too and begin a new life, in a place where she could come clean and start over.





She knew, of course, that that was coward and immature, but she was afraid that once the Weasley’s and Harry put two and two together they would blame her... It was something that couldn’t being erased from her mind.





Now she wear blond hair and blue eyes with a touch of freckles in her nose, sipping chocolate on the couch in the parlor watching the t.v. a foul show in France. She speaked the lenguage more or less, and even that she didn’t find the humor in the shows; ‘¿It supposed to be funny?’ Hermione asked at the telly as though it’ll actually come with an answer. Bored with this, turned off the thing and stood up to find a book where she could inmerse just to find looking at her favourite: Hogwarts, a history. Then a quarrel within aroused that was debating if she should pick that book or not. In the end, decided That was best to left the book where it was. Tiredly let herselffall in her bed thinking in Harry. ‘I’m sorry, Harry’ thought Hermione ‘Is my fault that your best friend is now dead. I don’t blame you if you hate me... At least you have Ginny’. This last was an unbearable thought. It was like stabbing a poisonous knife in her heart repeatedly. And each time that she remembered their engagement couldn’t help but cry. She was going to marry Ron... even if she didn’t wanted to... unless Hermione would like to live the rest of her life without someone who loved her. To Hermione, it seemed like her last chance to have a husband... a family... That’s why she accepted, for fear to remained alone.





Sometimes she was so fed up by the guilt, that was having plans of suicide. In the end just one thing refrained her to do it... one little thing. Her own secret prevent to kill herself. Resolutely, in the end, wished to the heavens that Harry and Ginny wil be happy once they get married... Harry’s happiness was the most important thing... even if that happiness means that she never marry the love of her life: Harry.