Party of Two
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Harry/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
2
Views:
72,717
Reviews:
54
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Harry/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
2
Views:
72,717
Reviews:
54
Recommended:
1
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Responses to reviews
Because of the nature of some of the reviews I received, I felt the need to add this extra section, just so that I could respond and make my voice heard.
First of all, I'd like to personally thank everybody for reading and reviewing. To those of you who really liked my story, I extend a big thank you:)
As for the rest of you...
Anon 2006-11-07 id # 3000047390
It's a shame that you are deleting reviews if they are not exclusively a praise of your writing. Your word choice is too cheap for a first time. The hole plot is unrealistic. Don't get me wrong, the story is not bad, but it is not perfect too. Hope you are not deleting this review too.
OK, I'm glad you didn't think my story was BAD, but may I remind you that I gave fair warning about the issues you addressed? If you paid any attention at all to my Author's Notes, then you knew damn well that the story didn't HAVE a plot, that it would be pure smut, AND that both Harry and Hermione would be OOC! Don't EVEN tell me that you didn't know what to expect!
Nathan 2006-11-07 id # 3000047436
I never mind a PWP smut fic, that's not the problem. Neither is their OOCness.
"...her clit tingled and salivated..." (Her clit salivated?)
"...tasting the bit of vanilla cream that had formed there." (What guy is going to taste like vanilla cream?)
"...she shimmied up and down his pole." (Ouch!)
"..Harry's quivering, pulsating member releasing a truckload of cum into her hungry twat?" (HAHAHA!)
Yup, this is porn alright. Very bad porn.
Too bad, because I think you could actually be a very good writer if you weren't trying so hard with the silly euphemisms and outlandish imagery. It's way, way over the top in this fic.
Could have been very sexy. But it's just inadvertently humorous and gross.
I hope you try again.
P.S. This is meant to be CONSTRUCTIVE criticism.
OK, Simon Cowell, I know you meant this to be CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, but you just hurt my feelings. Think about it, would YOU like it if someone said these things about something YOU wrote?
Now about all those things you didn't like when you picked my story apart like week-old leftovers...
"...her clit tingled and salivated..." (Her clit salivated?) Since you're so obviously a master of the English language, surely you're familiar with the wonderful world of metaphors? No? Well then let me make this a little simpler to understand: I was NOT referring to her clit LITERALLY salivating, I was simply referring to what happens when a woman becomes sexually aroused. I'm assuming you know what I'm talking about?
"...tasting the bit of vanilla cream that had formed there." (What guy is going to taste like vanilla cream?)
Did I SAY he tasted like vanilla cream? No, I didn't. If you really thought about it, you would've realized that I was referring to the color of his cum.
"...she shimmied up and down his pole." (Ouch!)
Once again, you fail to recognize a metaphor when it bites you in the ass. I was describing the way she moved, and I referred to Harry's penis as being a "pole" because it's long and hard like a pole. Get it?
"..Harry's quivering, pulsating member releasing a truckload of cum into her hungry twat?" (HAHAHA!)
I don't know why the hell you think this is so funny.
Oh, and I don't appreciate you saying my story is "very bad porn". Does that sound constructive to you? I think not! If you thought my story was humorous and gross, then you should've just kept those opinions to yourself. I hope next time you'll consider the author's feelings before you write something so harsh.
First of all, I'd like to personally thank everybody for reading and reviewing. To those of you who really liked my story, I extend a big thank you:)
As for the rest of you...
Anon 2006-11-07 id # 3000047390
It's a shame that you are deleting reviews if they are not exclusively a praise of your writing. Your word choice is too cheap for a first time. The hole plot is unrealistic. Don't get me wrong, the story is not bad, but it is not perfect too. Hope you are not deleting this review too.
OK, I'm glad you didn't think my story was BAD, but may I remind you that I gave fair warning about the issues you addressed? If you paid any attention at all to my Author's Notes, then you knew damn well that the story didn't HAVE a plot, that it would be pure smut, AND that both Harry and Hermione would be OOC! Don't EVEN tell me that you didn't know what to expect!
Nathan 2006-11-07 id # 3000047436
I never mind a PWP smut fic, that's not the problem. Neither is their OOCness.
"...her clit tingled and salivated..." (Her clit salivated?)
"...tasting the bit of vanilla cream that had formed there." (What guy is going to taste like vanilla cream?)
"...she shimmied up and down his pole." (Ouch!)
"..Harry's quivering, pulsating member releasing a truckload of cum into her hungry twat?" (HAHAHA!)
Yup, this is porn alright. Very bad porn.
Too bad, because I think you could actually be a very good writer if you weren't trying so hard with the silly euphemisms and outlandish imagery. It's way, way over the top in this fic.
Could have been very sexy. But it's just inadvertently humorous and gross.
I hope you try again.
P.S. This is meant to be CONSTRUCTIVE criticism.
OK, Simon Cowell, I know you meant this to be CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, but you just hurt my feelings. Think about it, would YOU like it if someone said these things about something YOU wrote?
Now about all those things you didn't like when you picked my story apart like week-old leftovers...
"...her clit tingled and salivated..." (Her clit salivated?) Since you're so obviously a master of the English language, surely you're familiar with the wonderful world of metaphors? No? Well then let me make this a little simpler to understand: I was NOT referring to her clit LITERALLY salivating, I was simply referring to what happens when a woman becomes sexually aroused. I'm assuming you know what I'm talking about?
"...tasting the bit of vanilla cream that had formed there." (What guy is going to taste like vanilla cream?)
Did I SAY he tasted like vanilla cream? No, I didn't. If you really thought about it, you would've realized that I was referring to the color of his cum.
"...she shimmied up and down his pole." (Ouch!)
Once again, you fail to recognize a metaphor when it bites you in the ass. I was describing the way she moved, and I referred to Harry's penis as being a "pole" because it's long and hard like a pole. Get it?
"..Harry's quivering, pulsating member releasing a truckload of cum into her hungry twat?" (HAHAHA!)
I don't know why the hell you think this is so funny.
Oh, and I don't appreciate you saying my story is "very bad porn". Does that sound constructive to you? I think not! If you thought my story was humorous and gross, then you should've just kept those opinions to yourself. I hope next time you'll consider the author's feelings before you write something so harsh.