Terrible Twosome

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\"Christ, Fred! We otta hurry and get that keg of Saki before those elves throw it away!\" George was going through his dresser in the hopes to find a clean pair of boxers. He frowned when he couldn\'t find any. *I\'ll just go with out \'em, it\'s only for an hour or so anyways.*

\"I know I know! And throwing away perfectly good wine is a crime! I mean, it gets better with age! How wasteful the elves are!\" Fred was combing his hair with his fingers as he watched his brother change. Fred smirked and walked over to the dresser where George was wrestling his way into small muscle shirt.

\"So, afta we get down there, get it, come back up here, it\'ll be noon tomorrow at the rate you take to change. Your just as bad as Ginny!\" With that, Fred promptly smacked George\'s delicious arse which he was damn sure looked just like his own, aside from a few scratches from recent activities of which we won\'t name.

\"Fruit.\" George muttered after nearly falling onto his face.

\"Why thank you my loving counterpart.\" Fred heard him snort as he finished getting dressed. Fred couldn\'t wait to get that new liqueur that they had from last week\'s dinner. It was Chinese New Year for some of the students, so Dumbledor made it Orient day and what not. Fred sniggered remembering last New Years before that. Ah, memories.

\"Damn it! Bloody thing wont listen!\" Fred snapped out of his memory, and looked over at George, as Fred\'s snakeskin belt tried to squeeze him in half. Fred burst out laughing. The damned thing never listened to anyone but Fred.

\"Don\'t just stand there, giggling your arse off like a gitty girl at prom night, and help me for Merlin\'s sake!\" Fred the felt tears well up, and clutched at his sides because they began to burn, but he didn\'t seem to care. George was turning a bit purple, and Fred knew at this point he should help his twin before he died due to lack of oxygen to his brain. Fred pulled out his wand, poked the snakeskin belt, and as it feel to the ground, slithering under the bed, Fred watched George turn back to a peachy sort of color with a bit flush.

\"Well, your a nice helpful one aren\'t you?\" He looked at his twin, breathing harshly, trying to regain the use of his legs, while glaring at him.

\"Oh, but aren\'t I quick?\" Fred smiled and poked George\'s freckled nose.

\"Yeah, sure. Any quicker and I am sure you would have almost beat a snail.\"

\"Ah, but how could I let \'anything\' happen to you? I love you, and besides, I\'d go completely mad with out you around. It\'s not fun to do tricks alone.\" Fred watched his frown turn upside down as he giggled in delight.

\"Well now George, I got the bag, you got the stink pellets and the luminous balloons? Don\'t want to run into any prefects now do we?\" Fred sniggered. He remembered the last time they did that. Lee had smashed into them, screaming like a little girl, then fainted. Oh what a sight that was. the next day however, he got them back.

\"Yes yes! Hm... pellets, check, balloons, check, wand, check. I got everything.\" He looked at him, then shook his head. The sight Fred saw was far from ready.

\"Ok, so when we get caught, which professor Snape sure as hell would, you\'ll be pantsless?\" George\'s blush was a very good reward for this news, and Fred continued.

\"And think of the things we\'d be doing down there... He\'d definitely see your hard-on. Just be your run of luck today?\" Fred knew it was coming, all he saw was a red hand fly down at his nose, stop abruptly, then flick it. He yelped and jumped away, hng hng his throbbing nose. Now that, Fred wasn\'t expecting.

\"Damn it! I hate you! You know how damn sensitive it gets!\" He complained, making a sound Ginny makes when Mum doesn\'t give her what she wants.

\"Well sorry.\" George retorted, sounding like, Percy.

\"Fuck you.\" Fred snapped, rubbing his poor red nose, sounding much like Draco.

\"When we get down into the kitchen.\" Fred blinked, hearing his twin\'s chuckle. He noticed George was putting on his pants, and using a draw string to tie it up. Fred stared blankly for about five minuets before regaining his composure, then grinned from ear to ear. Oh tonight was going to be even better then he thought. And to think, just a few moments ago, they were playing Exploding Snap with Ron and the others.

\"Well, let us leave then! It is about nine.\" George smiled and walked to the hidden door in front of the bed.

\"I can\'t argue with ya there. Off we jolly well go!\" Fred followed and said the password, backwards of course, otherwise it wouldn\'t open.

\"Password the forgot I.\"

They left their room, going out, and into the closet, shutting the door behind them. They ran down the stairs and George nearly tripped and fell, because his pants were slowly dropping. He stopped at the bottom of the steps to tie the draw string, the he looked up to see Fred talking with Ron, Harry, Hermione and Ginny. Apparently the others went to bed, like normal people might.

\"Harry, I\'m going to bed, night!\" Hermione smiled and went up to her dorm. Soon Ginny followed after her good night good bye. It was only George, his other half, Ron and Harry.

\"Well now, Fred and I plan to raid the kitchen of some butter beer and chocolate.\" George said, trying to look inconspicuous.

\"You two are free to use our room, if ya know what I mean.\" Fred hinted and tossed them the a piece of paper with the password to their room. George saw Harryp, ap, and look over at Ron, who was blushing just as red as an apple.

\"... I hate you two you know that?\" Ron said as George and Fred turned around and hugged him, then noogied Ron\'s head in a matter only a bully would do.

\"No ya don\'t! Now we ought to get going and...\" George stopped, watching Harry reach under the couch and toss the invisibility cloak at them.

\"You two can, be quiet at times, but being seen is a problem lately. I suggest you use that. I know you two are going to be gone a while?\" Harry said, obviously referring to the last time they got caught.

\"Well yes, we aren\'t coming back and...\" Fred slapped his hand to George\'s mouth.

\"Nothing! Just the beer and candy!\" Then Fred took his hand and led him out away way from the common room.

\"Thank you! Bye!\" George called, Fred repeating it after. George managed to catch a glimpse of Ron\'s face turning a deeper shade of red, then turn into a completely evil one and looked at Harry as the portrait swung closed.

Fred managed to pull George to a halting stop, to take the cloak from him. He snuggled up close behind him, throwing the it over themselves. It covered them completely, and dragged on the ground a bit. They made they way to dungeons, quiet as mice, but, along the way they nearly bumped into Snape himself when they rounded a corner.

\"What the devil...\" Snape looked around, then right at them, they froze and didn\'t dare to breath for fear Snape would catch them out late night, again. Fred thought for sure Snape had seen them. He\'d then curse them, or throw a deadly potion if he had, then they\'d die a most horrible, painful death. But luckily, of all people, Draco had saved them, which was one of the times they were actually glad to see the little bugger.

\"Professor Snape, We\'re waiting! Blaise is getting antsy and Pansy feels like she\'s going to barf her guts out! You have to do something!\" Draco drawled, obviously concerned for Blaise and not for Pansy.

\"Well it is her fault. The poor little slut deserves it you know.\" Snape droned and turned to Draco.

\"Yes, but Blaise was drunk, and didn\'t do anything but be deceived! He thought she was that 6th year he\'d had his eyes on for the last three years...\" Draco shut his mouth abruptly as Snape\'s mouth turned upwards into a little smirk.

\"Oh all right, and stop whining. I\'ll be there in a moment.\" With that Snape turned to his classroom, went in, then a few minuets came out again. He looked at the spot Fred and George were standing in, or rather, cowering in, and shook his head.

\"I must be going mad...\" He whispered then followed the fading footsteps of the little ferret Slytherin up the stairs from whence Fred and George came. Fred sighed out loud.

\"We almost got caught eh, George?\" He nodded and pushed Fred forwards. Within a few moments they came to the large wooden door for the kitchens, but, as luck would have it, it was unlocked. Sliding off the cloak, Fred watched George open the door, and pull him inside along with himself.

\"Well... Well...Lookie here...\" Fred bent over picking up the large barrel filled with Sake.

\"I found the half filled one!\" George called as he put it into the sack. The sack was one of those types that made things half their size and weight.

\"I found the other barrel! Come on over will you? It\'s heavy!\" George walked over, and damn, this barrel was twice the size of the one he had found. After about ten minuets of huffing, puffing and trying to move it, the twins decided to just drink a bit of it to lighten the load. George watched his twin tilted it upright, then jab a long tube into the side. Instantly, red liquid began to pour out onto the floor. He jumped as it splashed at his feet, which made Fred laugh. Fred grabbed the end of the hose, pushing the end into George\'s mouth, who didn\'t look too pleased.

\"Drink!\" He nearly choked, but drank quickly, after, Fred took a quick swig. George noticed Fred had spilled a lot on both of them, and on the floor. He shrugged, feeling the burning liquid wiggle down his throat and into his stomach. He plugged the hole, and took a step back, coughing, and trying to take deep breathes.

\"Fuck! It burns! What is this stuff? Fred, it sure as hell doesn\'t taste like Sake!\" George coughed and wheezed looking up at him for an answer that Fred didn\'t have.

\"I don\'t know! tastes like blackberry wine, mixed with sake, mixed with that awful stuff dad likes... What is that...Oh, yeah, Russian Rum.\" He made a face of disgust.

\"Yeah, with some of that weird stuff we tried at that muggle bar near Diagon Alley... Mike\'s Hard Lemonade was it?\" Fred drooled as he finished his sentence. That was good stuff, not strong enough, but good.

\"Hm.. We should mix some good stuff into this, make it taste better...\" George\'s face contorted into sheer evil as his brother finished.

\"What?\" Fred looked at his brother questionably.

\"We could sell it in our store!\" Fred stared at him. The more innocent out of the two of them was becoming more evil. *God I loved my brother.* Fred thought.

\"Right! Good idea.\" They both looked over at the bag, then smiled, George walked over to it, picked it up and just placed it over the keg, making it disappear into the sack, which was much easier then trying to lift it like earlier.

\"Well let\'s be off then...\" George stopped talking abruptly as he noticed Fred was looking at him in a strange way.

\"What? If it\'s the wine stain, it\'s your fault.\" George blinked surprised like, as he was pushed up against the nearest wall. A wet and warm tongue being thrust down his throat as were a pair of throbbing hips to his. George moaned softly, completely taken aback. *Fuck this feels good...* he thought, *The last time he touched me was... In the locker rooms last weekend after Quidditch... But oh... he never used such force.* He was being pushed up the wall more anre, re, yet he was being bounced at the same time. *Damn me for being the more gilry out of the two of us.*

\"Oh... God... Fred...\" George moaned loudly, feeling his mouth lick at his neck cou could feel his twin\'s throaty purr of satisfaction.

\"We ought to get you out of these dirty clothes, brother dear...\" Fred purred as George nodded and only replied with a squeak as he pulled off the other\'s robes off along with the sweater at once. He ran his fingers through his chin length red locks, just like his other half\'s. They felt of soft silk that had juice spilled on them. George fisted his hands in the locks, as he felt Fred\'s mouth lick around the left nipple. *Jesus fucking Merlin with a Firebolt*. He watched as Fred\'s hands went to the draw string, and undid the loose knot. George licked his dry lips unconsciously. *God, he wasn\'t gonna... No... Wait he was...*

\"Hm... You look very frisky tonight George...\"

Fred smiled devilishly. *Oh I was going to make him scream my name.* But first, he had to make the room silent. He pulled out his wand and before George could say anything, he cast the charm on the room. George looked down at Fred which a delicious lustful hazed look in his eyes. Just as Fred dipped his tongue into his better half\'s navel, he heard a sweet moan as he tasted the liqueur all over George\'s belly. His hands managed to un do the string, and as the pants fell to the floor, pooling at his ankles, Fred saw his member twitch to the cold air, contrasting with his warm breath.

\"Oh sweet Jesus... lower...\" Fred heard him whimper, pushing his hips forward, but he shook his head.

\"Don\'t push me or I wont give you anything tonight...\" He snickered and licked the tip, gently, very softly in fact, just barely touching. Fred felt his partner thrust himself into his mouth, so he pushed his head closer, letting George pump himself. As Fred held onto his thighs, he looked up as best he could. Fred saw *his* George\'s beautiful eyes, glaze over with passion, mouth partially open, and a slight blush on his cheeks. George\'s hands were in Fred\'s hair, they tightened as his pants grew louder. *God he could buck like a bull when he wanted too.* He thought.

\"Please. Oh. Fred... Let me...\" But before Fred could finish, George pulled himself away, standing and holding onto Fred. Fred knew he was going to fall with out his support.

\"Not yet, dear one. Not yet...\"

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