Bad Romance
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
17
Views:
16,576
Reviews:
14
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Snape/Hermione
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
17
Views:
16,576
Reviews:
14
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
The Harry Potter Universe belongs to JK Rowling, not me. The song Bad Romance belongs to Lady Gaga. I am making no profit from this story.
Romance
The Daily Prophet
Wedding Announcements
The Daily Prophet is please to announce the marriage of
Severus Tobias Snape
And
Hermione Jean Granger
December 15th, 2006
Best Man was Lucius Malfoy
Matron of Honor was Ginevra Potter
The Daily Prophet
Birth Announcements
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Alexander Arthur Snape
July 7th, 2007
Seven pounds, six ounces
20 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Helena Athena Snape
October 21st, 2008
Seven pounds, three ounces
18 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Cordelia Diana Snape
November 11th, 2010
Six pounds, nine ounces
19 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Desdemona Ariadne Snape
December 5th, 2011
Eight pounds, two ounces
21 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Sebastian Severus Snape
December 15th, 2012
Eight pounds, five ounces
22 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Want your bad romance
Want your bad romance
Want your bad romance
Side by side they stand. The tall, dark man is by no means handsome. His hair is perhaps less greasy than in the past, his teeth less yellow, though still crooked. His smile is small, but lacks the nastiness that it used to have. The woman is very pretty. Her hair is bushy, but soft, and her face is alight with happiness. They contrast well, his black robes against the white of her dress, her brilliant joy against the subtle warmth in his eyes.
Softly, but firmly they repeat the words uttered by so many over the centuries. They place the rings on each other’s fingers, and those in the chapel applaud when they kiss. The blonde best man applauds politely, while the redheaded matron of honor wolf whistles.
The chapel is by no means filled, but there are plenty of people. In the front row sit a wealth of redheads on the bride’s side, together with a young man with black hair and green eyes. On the groom’s side, a stern woman with square glasses sits beside a blonde woman and her son. Behind them sits a tiny man with fluffy white hair. He shouts hurrah in his little voice as everyone else claps. Beside him a plump woman, for once completely clean of dirt, applauds while smiling cheerfully.
Every face in the crowd is smiling, some more widely than others, true, but smiling none the less. The blonde young man on the groom’s side is smirking, and a few of the smiles among the redheads are a tad forced, but they are smiles.
The reception that follows is peaceful and happy. The guests mingle companionably, past disagreements put aside. The groom, while still a little stiff, is polite to all. The bride is radiant. All too soon the cake is cut. The groom offers a bite of cake to the bride. She accepts it, then smiles mischievously as she picks up his piece. His eyes widen, but he moves a little too slow. The entire crowd gasps with brief fright at the sight of the groom, frosting all over his nose.
His response is quick. With one hand he grabs his bride, with the other scoops up some cake and returns the favor. The guests are amazed at his smile, and the bride laughs companionably before they clean off the cake with their wands.
None of the crowd notice the bride’s added glow, nor the very slight curve of her belly. They dance the first dance, a slow waltz. The groom seems reluctant to let go of his bride when the oldest redheaded man comes to ask for a dance, but he lets go of her. It is the least he can do for the man who walked his bride down the aisle.
But as soon as their dance is done, the groom is there, waiting for his bride to be returned to him. She smiles as he sweeps her away. The dancing lasts for an hour or so before the bride and groom stop the music, wish their guests a good evening, then Disapparate.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seven Months Later (July 2007)
“Alexander is a lovely name. But I do believe I get to choose the middle name then.”
“And?”
“Severus. Alexander Severus Snape.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“The initials.”
“Oh, no!”
“Indeed.”
“Alexander Harry Snape?”
“Woman…”
“Kidding! Hmm. Alexander Arthur?”
“Arthur?”
“He’s the closest thing to a father I have anymore.”
“Very well.”
“Hello, Alexander Arthur. Oh, look at him yawn.”
“He’s rather small.”
“They all are, you know. You’ve seen James and Al and Scorpius. He’ll be bigger before you know it. Anyway, our little Alexander is tall for his age.”
“Of course our son is already showing off. I blame you, overachieving Gryffindor.”
“Mmhmm.”
“When you were giving birth, I…”
“I know, Severus. Don’t you trust St. Mungo’s? I’m fine. You didn’t need to frighten my healer with bloody retribution.”
“He was being slow.”
“Would you like to deliver the next baby?”
“…”
“I didn’t think so.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Six Months Later (February, 2008)
“Is he asleep?”
“Yes. I read to him from Potions Quarterly.”
“Mm, thank you. I think he‘d prefer Hogwarts, A History, though.”
“He’s six months old; he likes both. I think he’ll need feeding in a few hours, though.”
“Of course he will. Sweet little man. His hair is getting thicker, did you notice?”
“He seems to have grown quite rapidly. Thank God his nose hasn’t gotten any bigger yet.”
“Your hair, my nose.”
“Unfortunate child.”
“Shush, you. I have news…”
“Yes?”
“He should have his little brother or sister in about eight months.”
“…”
“Well?”
“I didn’t know you were related to Molly Weasley.”
“Severus, we agreed not to use contraceptives after Alex was born. You did say you wanted at least two. Being an only child is lonely.”
“I just didn’t expect it so soon.”
“But think… in eight months, we’ll have another little one.”
Then there is silence as he kisses her brow, then her belly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Years Later (November 2009)
“They’re so sweet when they sleep. Look at those little faces.”
“Despite being related to me, they are handsome children.”
“But because they are related to you, they are brilliant. And sneaky. Alex filched back the toy dragon I took away from him. And just imagine, soon they’ll be off to Hogwarts.”
“Wife, your children are two and one. They won’t be at Hogwarts for ages yet.”
“Mm. I was thinking…”
“Yes?”
“I’d like more children.”
“…”
“Severus, what are you doing with those handcuffs?”
“Making you pregnant.”
“Oh. Do continue.”
She grins as he drags her out of the nursery and back to their bedroom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seven Years Later (May 2016)
“Sebastian Severus Snape, stop that!” Hermione admonishes. The small boy looks up with a smirk before plastering an innocent look on his face.
“Sebastian, you are not allowed to throw bugs at guests.” Ten year old Scorpius Malfoy glares from under his blonde mop of hair as Hermione reprimands the unrepentant Sebastian.
“It was Mona’s idea.” Sebastian mutters. A few feet away, five year old Desdemona Snape shuffles her feet shamefacedly. Her dark, rich curls are pinned up, and her light brown eyes sparkle with mischief.
“Mum, Mum!” Alex yells from across the garden.
“What?” Hermione sighs as she turned toward the shout.
“Cordelia found a snake!” Hermione looks at Astoria Malfoy, who gives her a sympathetic look. Draco shakes his head as Severus stands up.
“All children will return to the table, now!” he shouts. From across the garden come yells as the children run back to their parents. Severus raises an eyebrow as the children assemble, the Snapes in a line from oldest to youngest.
Alexander Snape, age 9, has dirt on his nose. Helena Snape, age 8, has leaves tangled in her long dark brown hair. Beside them stands Cordelia Snape, age 6. Her pale, grinning face is not only covered in dirt, but she is holding a rather distressed looking snake.
Desdemona and Sebastian finish the line, and Scorpius stands off to the side. All of the children are looking at the snake, except Helena, who is looking at her feet.
“Cordelia, where on earth did you find that poor snake?” Hermione asks patiently. Cordelia grins.
“He was in the garden, Mum. I found him when we were playing in the leaf pile.” Draco raises an eyebrow.
“It was Helena’s idea,” Alexander says. Helena promptly sticks out her tongue. Severus notices to his amusement that she is standing as far away from Cordelia and the snake as possible.
“Put him back, please,” Hermione says firmly. Cordelia pouts.
“Surely they won’t hurt him,” Severus says. Cordelia grins again, not seeing her mother roll her eyes at Astoria.
“Put him back, Cordelia.” As the children sadly walk back to the leaf pile, Hermione raises an eyebrow at Severus.
“Such a softy in your old age, eh, godfather?” Draco smirks. Severus glares, and Draco quails, but only slightly. It is hard to be terrified of a man who lets his three daughters run all over him.
Suddenly, shouts come from the garden.
“What now?” Severus mutters as all four parents quickly make their way to the back of the yard.
The leaf pile is no longer a pile so much as an explosion. Scorpius and Alexander are wrestling in the leaves while Cordelia and Desdemona shout encouragement. Sebastian watches quietly, while Helena looks as if she very much wants to stop the fight, but has no idea how.
“Take it back!” Alex yells.
“No!” Scorpius yells back.
“Children!” Severus says sternly. Both freeze, then turn to look at their audience. Helena is wringing her hands, and her eyes are slightly red.
“Explain,” Severus orders.
“Scorpius said Helena was a scaredy cat, because she jumped when the snake wiggled past her foot,” Alex says petulantly.
Severus looks at Helena.
“It licked me, and it tickled, and I don’t like snakes!” She sniffles. Severus frowns, and kneels by the unhappy child, wrapping her in his arms.
“Scorpius, apologize to Helena,” Draco says sternly.
“Sorry, Helena,” Scorpius says, somewhat resentfully.
“Apology accepted,” she replies, glaring around her father’s hair. The corner of Severus’ mouth twitches. Helena sounds very much like her mother.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: Thanks to the fabulous Soline as always. The epilogue will be up soon.
Wedding Announcements
Severus Tobias Snape
And
Hermione Jean Granger
December 15th, 2006
Best Man was Lucius Malfoy
Matron of Honor was Ginevra Potter
The Daily Prophet
Birth Announcements
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Alexander Arthur Snape
July 7th, 2007
Seven pounds, six ounces
20 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Helena Athena Snape
October 21st, 2008
Seven pounds, three ounces
18 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Cordelia Diana Snape
November 11th, 2010
Six pounds, nine ounces
19 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Desdemona Ariadne Snape
December 5th, 2011
Eight pounds, two ounces
21 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mr. and Mrs. Severus Snape are pleased to announce the birth of
Sebastian Severus Snape
December 15th, 2012
Eight pounds, five ounces
22 inches long
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Want your bad romance
Want your bad romance
Want your bad romance
Side by side they stand. The tall, dark man is by no means handsome. His hair is perhaps less greasy than in the past, his teeth less yellow, though still crooked. His smile is small, but lacks the nastiness that it used to have. The woman is very pretty. Her hair is bushy, but soft, and her face is alight with happiness. They contrast well, his black robes against the white of her dress, her brilliant joy against the subtle warmth in his eyes.
Softly, but firmly they repeat the words uttered by so many over the centuries. They place the rings on each other’s fingers, and those in the chapel applaud when they kiss. The blonde best man applauds politely, while the redheaded matron of honor wolf whistles.
The chapel is by no means filled, but there are plenty of people. In the front row sit a wealth of redheads on the bride’s side, together with a young man with black hair and green eyes. On the groom’s side, a stern woman with square glasses sits beside a blonde woman and her son. Behind them sits a tiny man with fluffy white hair. He shouts hurrah in his little voice as everyone else claps. Beside him a plump woman, for once completely clean of dirt, applauds while smiling cheerfully.
Every face in the crowd is smiling, some more widely than others, true, but smiling none the less. The blonde young man on the groom’s side is smirking, and a few of the smiles among the redheads are a tad forced, but they are smiles.
The reception that follows is peaceful and happy. The guests mingle companionably, past disagreements put aside. The groom, while still a little stiff, is polite to all. The bride is radiant. All too soon the cake is cut. The groom offers a bite of cake to the bride. She accepts it, then smiles mischievously as she picks up his piece. His eyes widen, but he moves a little too slow. The entire crowd gasps with brief fright at the sight of the groom, frosting all over his nose.
His response is quick. With one hand he grabs his bride, with the other scoops up some cake and returns the favor. The guests are amazed at his smile, and the bride laughs companionably before they clean off the cake with their wands.
None of the crowd notice the bride’s added glow, nor the very slight curve of her belly. They dance the first dance, a slow waltz. The groom seems reluctant to let go of his bride when the oldest redheaded man comes to ask for a dance, but he lets go of her. It is the least he can do for the man who walked his bride down the aisle.
But as soon as their dance is done, the groom is there, waiting for his bride to be returned to him. She smiles as he sweeps her away. The dancing lasts for an hour or so before the bride and groom stop the music, wish their guests a good evening, then Disapparate.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seven Months Later (July 2007)
“Alexander is a lovely name. But I do believe I get to choose the middle name then.”
“And?”
“Severus. Alexander Severus Snape.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“The initials.”
“Oh, no!”
“Indeed.”
“Alexander Harry Snape?”
“Woman…”
“Kidding! Hmm. Alexander Arthur?”
“Arthur?”
“He’s the closest thing to a father I have anymore.”
“Very well.”
“Hello, Alexander Arthur. Oh, look at him yawn.”
“He’s rather small.”
“They all are, you know. You’ve seen James and Al and Scorpius. He’ll be bigger before you know it. Anyway, our little Alexander is tall for his age.”
“Of course our son is already showing off. I blame you, overachieving Gryffindor.”
“Mmhmm.”
“When you were giving birth, I…”
“I know, Severus. Don’t you trust St. Mungo’s? I’m fine. You didn’t need to frighten my healer with bloody retribution.”
“He was being slow.”
“Would you like to deliver the next baby?”
“…”
“I didn’t think so.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Six Months Later (February, 2008)
“Is he asleep?”
“Yes. I read to him from Potions Quarterly.”
“Mm, thank you. I think he‘d prefer Hogwarts, A History, though.”
“He’s six months old; he likes both. I think he’ll need feeding in a few hours, though.”
“Of course he will. Sweet little man. His hair is getting thicker, did you notice?”
“He seems to have grown quite rapidly. Thank God his nose hasn’t gotten any bigger yet.”
“Your hair, my nose.”
“Unfortunate child.”
“Shush, you. I have news…”
“Yes?”
“He should have his little brother or sister in about eight months.”
“…”
“Well?”
“I didn’t know you were related to Molly Weasley.”
“Severus, we agreed not to use contraceptives after Alex was born. You did say you wanted at least two. Being an only child is lonely.”
“I just didn’t expect it so soon.”
“But think… in eight months, we’ll have another little one.”
Then there is silence as he kisses her brow, then her belly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Years Later (November 2009)
“They’re so sweet when they sleep. Look at those little faces.”
“Despite being related to me, they are handsome children.”
“But because they are related to you, they are brilliant. And sneaky. Alex filched back the toy dragon I took away from him. And just imagine, soon they’ll be off to Hogwarts.”
“Wife, your children are two and one. They won’t be at Hogwarts for ages yet.”
“Mm. I was thinking…”
“Yes?”
“I’d like more children.”
“…”
“Severus, what are you doing with those handcuffs?”
“Making you pregnant.”
“Oh. Do continue.”
She grins as he drags her out of the nursery and back to their bedroom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seven Years Later (May 2016)
“Sebastian Severus Snape, stop that!” Hermione admonishes. The small boy looks up with a smirk before plastering an innocent look on his face.
“Sebastian, you are not allowed to throw bugs at guests.” Ten year old Scorpius Malfoy glares from under his blonde mop of hair as Hermione reprimands the unrepentant Sebastian.
“It was Mona’s idea.” Sebastian mutters. A few feet away, five year old Desdemona Snape shuffles her feet shamefacedly. Her dark, rich curls are pinned up, and her light brown eyes sparkle with mischief.
“Mum, Mum!” Alex yells from across the garden.
“What?” Hermione sighs as she turned toward the shout.
“Cordelia found a snake!” Hermione looks at Astoria Malfoy, who gives her a sympathetic look. Draco shakes his head as Severus stands up.
“All children will return to the table, now!” he shouts. From across the garden come yells as the children run back to their parents. Severus raises an eyebrow as the children assemble, the Snapes in a line from oldest to youngest.
Alexander Snape, age 9, has dirt on his nose. Helena Snape, age 8, has leaves tangled in her long dark brown hair. Beside them stands Cordelia Snape, age 6. Her pale, grinning face is not only covered in dirt, but she is holding a rather distressed looking snake.
Desdemona and Sebastian finish the line, and Scorpius stands off to the side. All of the children are looking at the snake, except Helena, who is looking at her feet.
“Cordelia, where on earth did you find that poor snake?” Hermione asks patiently. Cordelia grins.
“He was in the garden, Mum. I found him when we were playing in the leaf pile.” Draco raises an eyebrow.
“It was Helena’s idea,” Alexander says. Helena promptly sticks out her tongue. Severus notices to his amusement that she is standing as far away from Cordelia and the snake as possible.
“Put him back, please,” Hermione says firmly. Cordelia pouts.
“Surely they won’t hurt him,” Severus says. Cordelia grins again, not seeing her mother roll her eyes at Astoria.
“Put him back, Cordelia.” As the children sadly walk back to the leaf pile, Hermione raises an eyebrow at Severus.
“Such a softy in your old age, eh, godfather?” Draco smirks. Severus glares, and Draco quails, but only slightly. It is hard to be terrified of a man who lets his three daughters run all over him.
Suddenly, shouts come from the garden.
“What now?” Severus mutters as all four parents quickly make their way to the back of the yard.
The leaf pile is no longer a pile so much as an explosion. Scorpius and Alexander are wrestling in the leaves while Cordelia and Desdemona shout encouragement. Sebastian watches quietly, while Helena looks as if she very much wants to stop the fight, but has no idea how.
“Take it back!” Alex yells.
“No!” Scorpius yells back.
“Children!” Severus says sternly. Both freeze, then turn to look at their audience. Helena is wringing her hands, and her eyes are slightly red.
“Explain,” Severus orders.
“Scorpius said Helena was a scaredy cat, because she jumped when the snake wiggled past her foot,” Alex says petulantly.
Severus looks at Helena.
“It licked me, and it tickled, and I don’t like snakes!” She sniffles. Severus frowns, and kneels by the unhappy child, wrapping her in his arms.
“Scorpius, apologize to Helena,” Draco says sternly.
“Sorry, Helena,” Scorpius says, somewhat resentfully.
“Apology accepted,” she replies, glaring around her father’s hair. The corner of Severus’ mouth twitches. Helena sounds very much like her mother.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: Thanks to the fabulous Soline as always. The epilogue will be up soon.