As If In Wonderland

Hermione had not uttered a word the whole day as house elves assisted in dressing her and preparing her to be married, Narcissa Malfoy had been sent to make sure the bride to be was ready for what was waiting for her. Narcissa had come in looking pleasant, smiling and being nice to Hermione, though she did not utter a single word, just got ready in silence, knowing Narcissa was only being nice because she had to be.

“You look beautiful dear”, She looked Hermione up and down and making sure she looked just right. Hermione looked at herself in the mirror, the white gown she wore was fit for a princess, yet she didn’t feel like it, the gown was tight fitting before flowing out, diamonds were encrusted almost everywhere. It didn’t make sense to her, white was for the pure, and yet she wasn’t. her hair was curled down to her waist, with a small tiara on top of her head, a veil hanging behind it, ready to be pulled before her face as she walked down the aisle. Hermione knew she looked beautiful, though she was never a vain person and still wasn’t, she could see she did look rather pretty. The thing that spoiled it though, was what she was thinking.

“I cant do this”, she stuttered

“What?”

“I cant marry him, I-I just cant”

“Im sorry, but you have no choice in that matter”, Narcissa said, sounding truthfully sympathetic, “why cant you marry him?”

“I don’t know, im not his equal and I don’t agree with some of the things he does”

“My dear, you probably hate me as you see me as a pureblood stuck up woman with an arrogant arse of a husband”, she smiled as Hermione chuckled, “but it’s the choices we make what count, not our husbands. Lucius is a very high ranking death eater, and I have been hurt many times, but I still love him very much, though some of the time I just hate him”

“im scared though”, Hermione whispered timidly.

“We all are, but you have an advantage-your husband is the most powerful man in this world, you are the safest person and are only a wedding vow away from being the dark lady”

“What if im not ready for that? Narcissa, can I tell you something”

“Of course, but we have to hurry, the dark lord does not like to be kept waiting”

“I know. The thing is, I think im most scared because I…well I think I like him more than I thought”, she finally admitted with a nervous sigh, Narcissa gave her a hug and promised her things will be ok. “Thank you, I know he does not love, he thinks it as a weak emotion, but I think he might be quite close to that feeling-well as much as a person who doesn’t love does”

“You know Hermione, I believe you are quite right”, she gave her one last assuring smile before placing the veil over her eyes. “It is time”, Hermione took a long deep breathe and nodded, “you are being married downstairs in the grand hall, apparently the dark lord made sure every death eater and follower is present-he wants the world to know, even though he only announced his engagement to you this morning”

“It must have been a surprise to everyone then”

“Yes, well, I guess”, she replied while fixing her long blonde hair into a glamorous bun. Hermione looked down at the necklace Voldemort had given her before, the green heart with the snake lay above her breasts in contrast to the pureness of the gown she wore.

“Im ready”

*.

Hermione stood alone outside the door to the hall, waiting to enter. She wanted to cry as she had always imagined being walked down the aisle by her father, but she was to walk alone towards the most evil man in the world. He really wasn’t that bad to her, maybe he really did care about her, either way she had no choice in the matter of marrying. She didn’t mind, she did want to be his wife, but she hadn’t realised until she put on her wedding gown that there was a possibility she felt more for him than she thought before…and that scared her.

“Welcome to the dark side Hermione, there is no going back now”, she said to herself with one last deep breathe as the doors opened and she was faced with her future. She was shocked at how the room had been transformed into a sort of winter wonderland, similar to how the great hall at Hogwarts looked for the Yule Ball-just without the Christmas trees. What stunned her even more way the amount of people in there, only few she recognised from Voldemorts death eater meetings, but the rest she guessed were followers she had never met or just paid no attention to. In front of her way a short aisle lit by small lanterns with even little candles that gave a warm contrast to the rest of the room, the end stood Voldemort with his back to her, she could see he was wearing rich, exquisite robes in black but with a green tint.

She moved swiftly forward, knowing it was her only destination, she was surprised how easy she found it to walk in the massive dress, it must have a charm to make it weightless…after what felt like miles, she was standing by his side, finally he looked at her, his gaze catching hers. He looked her up and down and leant over to whisper, “you are beautiful”, before resuming his place and facing an old man who seemed to be the one who as conducting the marriage.

“We are gathered here, to witness the marriage…”, Hermione wasn’t listening, facing Voldemort who didn’t seem to be listening much either, he didn’t break eye contact-even through the veil over her face.

The next few minutes past in what felt like seconds, from being a single woman, servant to the dark lord, to a servant, married to the dark lord. A silver ring slid round her finger, a snake embellished in green through it, the same as what Voldemort wore.
“For now the blood of the female must be tasted by the stronger male”, the priest said while nodding to Voldemort, Hermione rolled her eyes at the word stronger making him smirk

“Show me the palm of your ring fingers hand”, he said, Hermione hesitated before obliging and lifted her hand, “don’t worry, this is how all wizarding marriages happen-I hear it is different to muggles one”, he muttered before placing his wand on her palm and said a few words in Latin. She squinted in pain as a small cut appeared and blood spilt through her broken flesh, Voldemort leaned down and kissed it, causing her to shiver as she saw the blood on his lips, she began to breathe heavily as he licked away the rest of the blood that had spilt, and to her surprise the cut then healed and she felt an overwhelming sense go through her body.
“Are you ok?”, he asked as he rose back to her level.

“Not what I was expecting”, she breathed as the priest finished the marriage.
From gazing into his eyes, to having her lips stolen by im after he lifted her veil, finally it was over and applaud broke out, she could taste her own blood still on his lips.

“My loyal followers, I introduce to you…Hermione my wife, and now…your lady”, more applause broke out and Hermione looked on, in shock…was she really the dark lady?
“Yes, you are”, he whispered in her ear, “and you should work on your occlumency skills”, he chuckled.

“I-im married to you, im married to you”, she repeated, “is this real?”

“Yes, and you are as close to an equal as anyone could ever get to me”

“Oh my god, I-I don’t know what to say…I knew this day was happening, but its just hit me”

“Ever since I saw you at end of the aisle, ive been needing to consummate this marriage”, he said huskily to her so only she could hear while keeping his hand round her waist possessively, “but first, we must stay here for a while, and it shall be a short while…it wont look good if I abandon my followers after summoning them all here on short notice”

“Of course milord”

“I think it is inappropriate if you call me your lord now when in my personal presence, in front others you shall, but…when alone with me, you may refer to me as Voldemort if you desire”

“Still not interested in your real name?”, Hermione smirked.

“Im no muggle…so would you refer that then?”

“Yes Voldemort”, she grinned, saying it so only he could hear before raising her voice again, “so milord, I think its time we thanked those loyal to you”

*.

Hermione sat with a smile on a face next to Voldemort at the top of an incredibly large table filled with so much food it was a wonder where it all came from, what seemed like hundreds of guests ate and socialised formally, it would be a surprise to the normal person how the worlds darkest wizards sat in a room…politely, and cheerfully.

Hermione saw familiar faces down the table, a few deatheaters she knew from around the building, Lucius and Narcissa as well as Draco sitting next to them looking rather bored but still much better than the day before.
“Milord, may I excuse myself? Id like to talk to Draco outside, please?”, Hermione asked nicely, after a moment Voldemort nodded to which she thanked him. Getting up and grabbing Draco to come outside she laughed as soon as they were out.

“What?”

“Its just funny isn’t it, im married!”, Hermione laughed and began walking with him along the hallway.

“Had too much to drink?”, Draco smirked, “so why did you get me ? Im glad I admit, no offence but I was bored in there, my parents aren’t exactly fun”

“I just wanted to chat, you are the only person my age here, I like talking to you”, Hermione shrugged. “Come on, I need some air”, she muttered while pulling him outside, the cold air hit them as winter was upon them, but she couldn’t feel the cold.
“I guess I just wanted to say, well I almost didn’t go down the aisle, I really had doubts-but your mother reminded me I had no choice, and she was right…but still, I am still so scared”

“Why?”, Draco asked as they walked under the starry skies, “you have had a rough time here, but now…you are so safe”

“That’s what your mother said, but its not that…im scared because…I don’t know, its stupid”

“Come on tell me”

“I-I…”, Hermione sat down on a random piece of grass and gazed up at the stars while not looking at Draco who stood next to her, “I think im falling in love with him”

“Shit”, Draco muttered, eyes wide. “Hermione, you know he doesn’t-”

“I know, and I know he never will, and that’s what scares me…I don’t want to love him, but I think I cant help. I hate him so much! He‘s hurt me in so many ways, why do I feel like this”, she sighed.

“Erm, I don’t really know much about this kind of stuff…I can only say that it was a surprise to hear that”

“Im sorry for telling you, I just needed to tell someone, and well I trust you the most here”

“really?”

“Well who else do I trust?”

“Good point”, he chuckled, “I can honestly say I have no idea what to say, so im sorry…but at least its off your chest now…what else do you want to say that I can understand?”

“You are rather helpful”, she pouted followed by a grin, “I noticed Grindelwald wasn’t there, where is he these days?”

“He is around the castle somewhere, but there is rumours he is working against the dark lord, and he wasn’t invited to the wedding-just in case”

“Really? He’s a pretty dark wizard though”

“Ah yes, but his father was murdered by the dark lord, and the only reason Grindelwald really does work for him is because he would be killed otherwise”

“I guess your right”

“Im always right, if I wasn’t then I wouldn’t be head boy now would I”, he smirked, laying down and gazing at the stars above, Hermione did the same and lay next to him.

“You are not such a good head boy are you, shouldn’t you be at school now?”

“Im a deatheater, I have privileges”, he laughed. “I think its time we got back, the dark lord would want his wife by his side this evening”, Draco pushed himself up and gave Hermione a hand as he pulled her up, “I shall escort you back to the great hall milady”, he said in a posh accent and a bow making Hermione laugh out loud.

“You make me laugh, and don’t call me your lady, its just cringe worthy…I cant believe im married, im still just a teenager, im not ready for this”

“Im sure everything will be fine”, he smiled as Hermione gave him a kiss on his cheek and thanked him.

“Hermione?”, she recognised the voice as Grindelwald behind her and Draco as they neared the hall, turning round she saw it was indeed him.

“Yes?”

“May I speak to you? Alone?”

“Im not going anywhere-”, Draco started but was hushed by Hermione.

“Its ok, go back and tell the dark lord ill be back soon”, Hermione told him with a smile, Draco stood for a moment before taking off annoyed.
“What is it you want?”

“To warn you about what you are getting yourself into”

“I haven’t got myself into anything, you know I didn’t choose to be here-”

“-I know that, im warning you about what you said to young mr Malfoy, if you start announcing you love the dark lord you are more than likely going to be killed within 24 hours”, he dragged her along into a nearby room, the cosy lounge Voldemort had told her before he relaxed in.

“You were listening to my conversation! What’s it got to do with you!”

“Don’t speak to me so rudely”, he pulled his wand out, shutting Hermione up. “Remember the time when you first came, and you were sat at the table with all the deatheaters? I was nice then, and you probably think me as a nice person, I promise you I am not. Though I am warning you, don’t get into things you wont be able to get out of, its only some advice but take it”. He stood in front of her, scratching his balding head and holding his wand tight in his other hand, eyes narrowed into hers, “if I was you…depending on what you want, I would ask the dark lord to treat you as a simple servant-you would have things much easier”

“What makes you think that?”

“Why do you think he asked you to marry you? It certainly wasn’t a spare of the moment thing”, Hermione thought for a moment, he was sort of right, she had been thinking about it also.
“Ah, so you do wonder”

“You don’t know me Grindelwald, whiles I know a lot about you, I know of your past, I know you are only alive because the dark lord likes your work”

“You may know a lot of me, but you don’t know me-and it goes the same for you, I don’t know you but I do know much more than you would think about you. That doesn’t mater, you realise being married to the dark lord binds you to him…till death? No escape, you went through an unusual marriage, though you may not have realised as you have never been to a wizarding marriage before so you would think it was the norm…it is an ancient ritual a few powerful wizards in the past used to be able to control their wives”

“What do you mean!”

“Didn’t you find it odd that the dark lord drank a bit of your blood?”

“Its part of wizarding ritual, that-that’s what he told me”, she stuttered, closing her hand and remembering the vampire like moment not so long ago.

“You are naïve”, he laughed, “intelligent and powerful, but still quite naïve. It is part of an ancient ritual, unheard of these days as it was banned by the ministry, where a husband wants to have his wife bound to him, once the blood touches his lips while wandlessly and silently casting a spell, immediately after the ring is placed on the finger…well, to put it in easier words…the dark lord has the right, more so ability to use your magic-consider it like the imperio curse”

“You are lying”

“Don’t ever accuse me of lying”, he threatened angrily, “one thing I don’t do, is lie. And I find that quite rude of you to say”

“Sorry, then if you are not lying, then you are mistaken”

“The dark lord bound you to him, because he can ‘borrow’ your magic, and he can also control how you use your own to some extent, the only flaw is that he cant hurt you with your own magic, and you must be present when he uses you”

“Why tell me this?”, Hermione shivered.

“Because after hearing you may be falling in love with him…well I thought I should mention to you that you are stuck with him, and he can control you if he likes…he will never love you, you are just a servant, but with a lot of potential…marrying you just guarantees to him he can see your full potential”

“Really, why did you tell me? You are a respected follower of the dark lord, why tell me!”

“You have through a lot and you never broke down to the dark lord-for that I respect you. You deserve to know”, he shrugged and closed his eyes, “you should be getting back, I was not invited for some reason…but I have things to do in the library. Good night Hermione”, he nodded before apparating away to her surprise.

“Where have you been?”, Voldemort asked Hermione as she sat herself by his side back in the hall, she glanced at Draco down the table who looked down as they made eye contact, “I hear you have been talking to Grindelwald”

“He wanted to speak to me milord”, she replied, “just congratulated me on the marriage and apologised for not being able to come, something about doing research…”, Voldemort seemed to take her word for it, as it was true-she had just left out some details.

“You missed dessert”

“I think you can forgive me for that”, he smirked when she looked up at him and took her hand to rub where he had made her bleed before, Hermione shivered inside at Grindelwald words…were they true? Why would he lie though…but why would he tell you anyway?

“You have something on your mind”, he said so only she could hear.

“I just don’t like such formal gatherings with these people, im sorry”, she apologised, looking him into the eyes while blocking off her mind.

“We shall be leaving soon anyway, things still have to be taken care of…”, he stroked her thigh through her dress, but doing it so no one else would notice and causing her to feel uncomfortable.
“You are beautiful, and you would be surprised if you knew how much I am going to enjoy having you by my side on an everyday occasion…do you want to be the dark lady?”

“Even if I did, you wouldn’t allow someone to be known as quite near to an equal”

“You want to be my lady, and I would like that too, people are already addressing you as such, it wont take long for you realise what you want and then…oh then I will love having you helping lead the world and be my lover of a night time”, he gripped her thigh tightly making her gasp before composing herself.

“We will have to see milord”

“My loyal followers”, Voldemort turned to the table, silence came over so quickly Hermione looked on in surprise how easily the dark lord could do such things, “I thank you all, once again for being here tonight. We have moved on to another level, we will see old rules ridden of and new ones brought it, and with the help of my wife here…I believe change shall be good”, he smirked as he was greeted with cheers. He would have carried on if it wasn’t for a hand on his side and then his wife standing up next to him, to his own surprise and the astonishment of the room, no one ever made a speech apart from the dark lord.

“Erm, hi”, Hermione looked around awkwardly, “I just had some things to say because…well a lot of you here don’t like me and don’t believe I should be even be allowed to sit at a table, let alone be married to the dark lord. Well, as you know I didn’t choose to be here, and I hated it…”, she sighed while glancing down to the dark lord who looked on curiously.
“Though, lately I have seen and done things I never knew I was capable of, let alone even think of doing. The power I have and the things my lord has taught me, are remarkable, yes some may say dark but still…they are so brilliant. I admit I don’t support everything our lord says, and I will probably be punished for saying that-but, lately I think I have changed. I have matured if you like, from a mere student to a sorceress, and I promise you all, I will show you what I am capable of and I will please you. I have my lord to thank for that change, and I am glad to say finally, I am quite proud to be married to the dark lord and am proud to be able to serve the death eaters as a whole”, she finished with a shrug before sitting down. Silence, even more silent than before. Hermione looked down nervously, quite worried about being punished for speaking up so boldly, but she had to say the things.
A clap, a pair of hands clapping, two pairs of hand clapping…applause.
Hermione was confused but seeing Voldemort looking at her with a smile, she returned it, feeling happy at last.

*.

“Im proud of you”, Voldemort said as he lay on top of her on their bed, they had already spent an hour or so consummating their marriage and he only stopped to say those few words.

“Why?”, she breathed.

“That speech you gave to my followers, you made quite an impression, and im proud of what you said”

“I just thought I should announce how I feel, a lot of your followers hate me so I thought id straighten that out…you aren’t mad?”

“Mad? It made me want even more people to know you are married to me!”, he smirked as she gave him a small smile and played with his hair. “Now I can give you more responsibilities, you can decide peoples futures if you want, you can assist me with the upgrading and modernising of the laws”

“Why? Why would marrying me make you want some laws to be changed?”

“Just would like your input, if you have a problem with that then don’t do it”, he narrowed his eyes.

“I was just surprised that you would give me that sort of power, you trust me that much?”, he didn’t reply but she knew he would have said yes, “thank you”, she leaned up and kissed him on the nose as she couldn’t quite get to his lips.

“Thank you also my dear”, he swooped down to kiss her again and moved his hands south, “I think im going to enjoy married life”.

*.

“Milord?”, Hermione addressed him as she entered his study, he looked up with a smile-something he seemed to be doing a lot over the day, it was only the day after the wedding.

“Call me Voldemort, its not your place to call me your lord when we are alone”

“Erm, Voldemort…one of the house elves told me you wanted to see me?”, she asked before sitting herself down in front of him, he pushed aside the notes he was writing with a nearby quill and leaned back into his chair.

“I think there is a few things we need to discuss…last night you disappeared with Draco, then he tells me you went off with Grindelwald…what happened?”

“Nothing, I told you, he just congratulated me on the wedding”

“Don’t take me for a fool Hermione, I know when you are lying”

“Oh is that another part of being bound to you”, she muttered under her breathe, he heard.

“What did he tell you?”

“You know he told me about our marriage, you know he told me our marriage isn’t a normal one…and it made me even more scared than I was before! You don’t have a clue do you, you know nothing of feelings or emotions, and when I start feeling-I find out im just being used, I know im nothing special, but did you really have to make me feel for that small moment I meant something?”, she growled feeling tears slide down her cheeks. “Yesterday was supposed to be the best day of my life…I spent the evening pretending I was ok, I even said some stupid speech in support of you because I thought Grindelwald had been lying…but then this morning I read up about it, and its true!”

“Lower your voice, unless you want me to remove it”, Voldemort said after she shouted. “You stupid girl! I did not marry you to use you, don’t believe it if you don’t want to but I do care about you-I hate to admit that, and I hate that I actually care for another being. I did not believe for a second you would work willingly at a higher level as my wife, so I just made the connection so you don’t get a choice, you will learn to like it, you just need this push”

“I keep forgetting who you are, but then you remind me you are the dark lord when you say and so things like this…I know it wont change, I just thought…maybe you could not hurt me so”

“Stop crying, I don’t want to see it”, he poured him and her drink, “it’s the first day of marriage, and yes I didn’t tell you all the details of our marriage, but from now on I don’t want to see or hear you mention it again. I promise you, you will be glad I did it, and I promise you that I will protect you”

“Im really going to be with you till I die aren’t I”, she sighed while wiping her eyes.

“Don’t sound so happy about it”, he muttered making her let out a small laugh, “I apologise for not telling you sooner, but this is what happens, if you don’t get over it im going to punish you because its getting on my nerves!”

“Fine”

“You will come around. I have a death eater to punish today…he failed in such a minor task this morning, he had to rid of a prisoner but killed the wrong one”

“Who is it?”, she asked, hoping it to be Lucius.

“Dolohov, you wont be coming along then I gather, seeing as you are against me this morning and you hate this kind of thing”

“I will come, and I will do the punishing for you if you like”, she said, Voldemort looked up in surprise, “don’t look so amazed, he cursed me a couple of years ago at the ministry and it left me in pain for weeks! Im allowed my revenge am I not, plus I don’t hurt the innocent, he is not innocent in any way”

“Wow, so I may not have to force you to use dark magic in future”, he smirked, impressed by her words. “Though I will be having a ‘chat’ with Grindelwald later, alone…”

“Don’t hurt him, please, he just told me the truth…”, she pleaded, “look, its not his fault im annoyed at you-either way I would still find out, and its better I know now than later on”

“So you are annoyed with me?”, he frowned

“Of course, I will make it clear this once, any emotion I feel-you will know about it!”, she finished and stood up, “is there anything else you wanted me for milord-erm, Voldemort?”

“Oh there I much I want from you my sweet, but I think I will leave it as it is for now, if you want to punish Dolohov then be in the hall before dinner. In the meantime, you can do a few things for me, I want you to have a look at the laws there are in place, and I would like you to make notes on what changes you think would be suitable…it may take a few day, and I wont listen to most of what you say, but I assure you if you make a good argument for something, I may consider it”

“I better get to it then”, she sighed with a roll to her eyes and turned to leave but stopped at the door. “You know, I never thought I would be in this position, so at ease at being in your company…being your wife! But what I said in that speech last night, it was all true…I guess just some of the things I always in life will never happen in life…some things such as marrying for love rather than power, having children and being free to do what I wish, peacefully…I guess them sort of things don’t happen, and you only see in those muggle films. I will see you later then”

Voldemort groaned before flicking his wand, “see the trouble you cause”, he muttered to Grindelwald who’s invisibility cloak had fallen off of him from Voldemorts wand. He sat in the corner, awake but frozen, before he released the charm and he fell to the floor.

“You are the one in trouble with the missus”, Grindelwald smirked before being tortured, after a few minutes Voldemort got bored and released him.

“I should kill you, it would be such a waste of good magic though…but you have been pissing me off a lot recently”

“I just told the girl what she needed to hear…you cant kill me, and you don’t want to kill me, im too useful. I wont bother you again milord, and I wont talk to the girl without your permission if that’s what you want”. Grindelwald stood up and scratched his head. “Do you know anything about your wife? I think I may actually know more about her feelings that you”, he grinned but cried in pain as he was thrown to the opposite wall,

“Tell me what you know”, it was an order that didn’t need much more threat, because it was common knowledge that even when the dark lord was calm, he was dangerous.

“The girl-”

“-stop calling her ‘the girl’, she is your lady now”

“Lady? She doesn’t look much like a lady, more like a common teenager in those casual muggle clothes just now…though she was quite good looking last night-”

“Get to the point”

“She announced to young mr Malfoy yesterday that she maybe be feeling more than she originally thought for you…don’t tell me you didn’t notice?”

“Get out”, Voldemort growled, “I will contact you when I need you not the other way round”

What a turn of events, he thought…


_

sorry for late updates as usual, you know how it is these days with work and things...