To Love a Malfoy

Chapter 15r
***Last Chapter:
Lifting up Harry’s hand, Lucius slid a large platinum band with a green emerald in the center on the ring finger of his left hand then kissed his knuckles.***

After placing the engagement ring on Harry’s finger, Lucius gently moved Harry to one side and standing up he kneeled down onto one knee in front of him. Taking Harry’s left hand in his, Lucius looked directly into Harry’s emerald eyes and asked.

“Harry James Potter, will you marry me?”

Sitting on the sofa starring back at Lucius, Harry was literally stunned by this unexpected announcement.

“Lucius, well...I...Ah...I...I...well…I really don’t know what to say.” stuttered a shocked Harry. When Harry saw that Lucius was not getting up from his position in front of him without some sort of answer, Harry squeezed his hand and responded softly his eyes brimming with tears. “Lucius Abraxis Malfoy, I would be honored to consider accepting your hand in marriage but first we need to talk before my decision is final.”

Lucius understood the reason why Harry was being cautious before giving him an answer. Standing up he sat back down on the sofa beside him and put his arm around the slim shoulders saying, “I was expecting this and will answer whatever questions you may have as to my intentions.”

Nodding his head, Harry took the initiative and started talking while fiddling with the engagement ring on his finger.

“Lucius, we have a very volatile history and so much has happened between us that I am worried a marriage might not be the best solution or in the best interest for our children.” Harry turned his head and looked up at Lucius and said with sincerity, “I am not saying I won’t give it, or us, a chance but right now due to both recent and past events that have occurred it seems highly unlikely that it would work out. As I have said before, I am willing to give our relationship a chance for the sake of our children but I am not sure this is the answer to our problem. At least not right now anyway. We are finally beginning to learn to trust and respect one another yet there is still so much more that we don‘t know about each other. I am sorry but I just don’t know about this working out.”

Lucius sighed and pulling Harry up closer to him he began, “I have done deplorable acts that I am honestly ashamed of, one of the worst of which is the horrendous deeds I enacted during my rein as a Death Eater for Voldemort. I had killed, tortured and humiliated both Wizards and Muggles alike without remorse and admit I should have received the Dementor’s Kiss for my actions. If not for the fact that I changed sides before Draco was born to become a spy for the Light, and that both Dumbledore and the Ministry forgave me for my actions against those innocents I would not be sitting here beside you right now.”

Lucius paused and closed his eyes before continuing in almost a whisper. “I still have nightmares for what I did and wish I could change the past but unfortunately I cannot. After Cissy became pregnant with Draco, the two of us realized that what we were doing was morally and consciously wrong. Cissy and I had been brought up with the belief that Pure Bloods were the only kind of Wizards that should be allowed to rule and exist in the World. It was ingrained into us as children and carried over to our adulthood. We both learned the hard way that what we believed to be right in all actuality was wrong. After Draco was born, we wanted him to grow up without the fear of death hanging over his head and without the prejudices that we had against anyone who wasn’t a Pure Blood Wizard. We also didn’t want him to follow in our footsteps and become a Death Eater and follower of Voldemort.” Lucius stopped for a moment and Harry could tell he was thinking back to some past memory. Harry patiently waited and then Lucius went on, “I am sorry to say that for his own protection we never told Draco we were spies as well as members of the Order of the Phoenix and he was brought up under a false pretense. Maybe if we had told him, then perhaps things between the two of you would have turned out differently and you could have been friends.”

Harry placed his hand over Lucius’ and they entwined their fingers then he said, “Lucius, you made the right choice when you and Narcissa decided to change sides. It was not your fault for being brought up under a Hitler type regime which drilled the wrong kind of values into your mind, anymore than it was mine, having to live with Muggle relatives as guardians who wanted to believe Wizards didn’t exist and that we were all freaks.” Harry leaned over and kissed Lucius on the cheek saying, “Yes, you did horrible and unmentionable acts against the innocent but you have acknowledged and accepted the blame for doing them. As punishment, you have lost the two most important people in your life as a consequence of your choices. We all can’t determine what fate has in store for each of us but living is a learning process that weaves it’s web through our lives and we have no way of knowing where it will lead us or how it will end. Even though it was wrong, I know that what you did was in order to survive and protect your family. I don’t agree with all of your choices in life but you have been punished enough. If the situation was reversed, then it could very well be I sitting next to someone pleading for exoneration to the one I have learned to care for.” Placing his head against Lucius’ shoulder Harry continued, “Yes, I wish Draco and I could have been friends,
and that I had accepted his hand that day at Madam Malkin’s then maybe he would have chosen a different path to follow and would be sitting here with us today. If I hadn’t judged Draco by what he said about Hagrid and tried to talk with him, then maybe I could have changed his opinion just a little bit. In a way it was my fault too, I got angry with him for stating what he felt was the truth instead of trying to reason with him.”

The room grew suddenly silent as they both sat deep in thought contemplating the memories that rushed forth from their discussion. Harry was getting hungry and his stomach started to gurgle. He called for Dobby and requested a snack for himself and Lucius. After they had eaten, the two of them now sitting in separate chairs sat looking at each other waiting for the other to begin. The fire in the hearth was crackling and Harry decided now would be the appropriate time to ask Lucius some important questions.

“Lucius, that night of the Ministry Gala Ball and what happened between us, I need you to explain to me the reason why you did it.” Harry stopped for a second to regain his composure then said, “I know you were hurting and wanted revenge but how could you have thought I wasn’t in pain from losing the ones I loved too. It wasn’t easy for me to defeat Voldemort you know and I suffered greatly through the years and blamed myself so many times for those that were killed especially my parents and Sirius. I didn’t deserve what you did to me or what you said in a moment of hatred.”

Lucius looked over at Harry, he had been listening carefully to everything he was saying and knew that now was the time of reckoning for his actions against Harry. With his gray eyes searching Harry’s green orbs, Lucius began his story.

He began at the beginning, from when he was a child and all about his upbringing and the way his parents enforced their beliefs onto him. Then he told Harry about his years at Hogwarts and marrying Narcissa. He told him about how he became Voldemort’s faithful follower and how through the years he did unspeakable crimes against the innocent.

“I blamed you for Cissy and Draco’s death even though it wasn’t your fault. I thought you should have been able to defeat Voldemort sooner even though you were just a child. In my own haughtiness, I never took into consideration the fact that you yourself had suffered so much loss at a such a young age and didn’t have the chance to know your own parents. I was the one who was wrong and it was my choices in life that led to the destruction of my beloved family. Harry you have to understand where I was coming from. I know that I can’t justify what I did but you have to know I have suffered greatly for my actions.”

Lucius paused from a moment then went on, “Yes, I was out for revenge the night of the Ball. I wanted to make you pay for the deaths of Cissy and Draco. I wanted to humiliate you in the worst possible way. I wanted to destroy you for not defeating Voldemort sooner. I wanted to hurt you. I wanted to show my dominance over you. I needed to blame someone other than myself for what happened to my wife and son, and the Ball gave me that opportunity. When I saw you standing at the bar, looking so naive and innocent, I zeroed in on your purity. I decided then to take you back to the Manor with me and deflower you. After the deed was done and my act of revenge was played out, I never took into consideration the fact that you would fight back and with such ferocity and bravery. I will never forget how you looked standing there and what you said to me that night before you left.”

Harry remained sitting quietly in his chair thinking back to that night waiting for Lucius to continue. He didn’t want to interrupt him and fought back the tears that threatened to pour from his eyes as he remembered every detail of what happened that night like he was living it all over again.

“Harry, I am sorry and all I can ask is for your forgiveness and that I promise to never physically hurt you again. The one thing I cannot promise is to change my ways over night. I am an aristocrat and a stubborn man who will not be easy to live with. I am sure there will be times that I will continue to insult your intelligence and also your friends. I cannot promise that we will not have fights because that would be a lie. I do promise that I will give my life to protect you and our children and that you will never want for anything. I will honor and cherish you. If you decide to accept my hand in marriage, then you will be entering into a marriage for life as Malfoys do not divorce.”

Lucius stood up and walked around the room in circles a couple of times, once looking out the large stained glass window overlooking the gardens, before stopping in front of Harry’s chair. He leaned down and pulled Harry up into his arms carrying him back over to the sofa where he sat down with Harry in his lap. Lucius securely wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist and held him firmly against his chest then nestled his neck inhaling his sweet scent.

“Harry our relationship will be a rocky one that both of us will have to work very hard at to make a success. It won’t be easy and you can be sure there will be fights between us but we will deal with them as they occur. I can’t offer you love, at least not right now, but hopefully that will come later.”

Harry squirmed around to face Lucius unaware of the friction he was causing and replied, “Lucius, I want this to work, I really do but can you truly believe that marriage is the solution?”

Lucius shifted his body on the sofa and slightly adjusted Harry to a more comfortable position then answered, “Yes, Harry, I do. It is the only way I can protect you and the babies. Do not forget that Chambers still has not been found and it is not safe for you to roam around without an escort. I will not put your life in jeopardy by allowing that sorry excuse of a Wizard to get his cowardly hands on you again. I am also worried that there are Wizards still lurking around who are our enemies and would like to take advantage of your delicate condition.”

Harry sighed and closed his eyes listening to Lucius continue talking, “Being pregnant has put you at a great disadvantage both magically and physically. I will not allow you to gallivant around all of Great Britain with your little group of faithful dunderheads putting yourself and our children in danger.”

Harry opened his eyes at this statement glaring up at the blonde who’s lap he was sitting in and huffed out a deep breath before angrily retorting, “They are not dunderheads so don’t you dare call them that ever again or so help me Merlin I will hex you with the Bat-Bogey Hex that Ginny taught me!”

Lucius rubbed his hand soothingly back and forth over Harry’s back until he calmed down then said, “I didn’t mean any harm my little lion so calm down. You don’t want to upset yourself needlessly or the babies. Take deep breaths, that’s it, nice and slow.”

Once Harry had settled down, Lucius decided it was time to finish his explanation. “Harry, I can give no other reason for my actions against you that night other than what I have already told you. All I can ask is for your forgiveness and to give me a chance so that I can prove that my intentions towards you are true and heartfelt. If you so desire, I will make the Unbreakable Vow with you right now in case there is any doubt left in your mind.”

Harry shook his head and replied, “Lucius, I believe you and I don’t expect us to make the Unbreakable Vow now or ever but there is just one more thing I have to say.” pausing he took a deep breath and said, “I am a half-blood so how do you justify our getting married based on what you have just told me? It stands against everything you believe in. I will not raise my children under the same false misconceptions that you were brought up with or subject them to your friends and acquaintances who may very well try to embarrass or degrade them. They will grow up knowing only love, kindness and gentleness under a loving nurturing environment.”

“Harry, I can’t change who I am nor what I have done but please know that it doesn’t matter whether you are half-blood, pure-blood, muggle or squib, I want to marry only you, live out the rest of my life with you, and be both a doting husband and devoted father. I want to build a new life with you and a new generation for both the Malfoy and Potter line.” he leaned in to kiss the green-eyed beauty sitting in his lap and ended his pledge with, “I await your answer Harry James Potter. Please don’t disappoint me or my once frozen heart will never again be mended, and I will never again be able to climb back out of the pit of despair to which I had fallen in."

Harry made his decision hoping that he wasn‘t making the biggest mistake of his life but trusting his instincts that were telling him this was the right thing to do. Taking hold of Lucius by the shoulders, he looked him straight in the eye and answered, “Lucius Abraxis Malfoy, I Harry James Potter accept your humble offer for my hand in marriage.”

Lucius and Harry kissed breaking only to breath before falling down together on the sofa. After a rather quick round of love making, and cleaning spells, they both were sitting together still talking. Lucius was feeding Harry chocolate covered strawberries that Dobby had been summoned to bring from the kitchen due to Harry’s sudden food craving rush.

“Lucius?” murmured Harry after having eating yet another fat juicy strawberry.

“Yes, Harry my plump little lion, would you like another strawberry or perhaps something else?”

Laughing, Harry pouted and playfully teased him back before getting serious and telling his future husband. “We have to decide what we are going to name our babies. Let’s look over the list of names together and choose them tonight.”

Lucius pulled the parchment off the table and together they went over the list with baby names again and again before finally reaching an agreement. It was a tough decision but they both agreed that the names they picked were appropriate and fitting to the name Potter-Malfoy.

“Lucius, quick give me your hand.” Harry suddenly cried out and placed the offered limb on his stomach so that Lucius could feel the babies kicking. He watched his lover’s eyes widen in amazement and they smiled at each other. Lucius leaned over to kiss Harry and tasted chocolate on his lips left from the strawberries. Unable to control himself, he licked the remainder off of Harry’s luscious lips delighting in his taste and the way Harry moaned when he did it.

“It seems they agree with our decision and are letting us know it pleases them.” whispered Harry.

Lucius and Harry both placed the palms of their hands together on Harry’s belly and said, “We look forward until the day each of you are born and become part of our family; Belinda Citlalli Potter-Malfoy, Lucien Samuel Potter-Malfoy, Alexander Damien Potter-Malfoy”

TBC