Send Me a Virgin

Well apparently some of you took exception with the events of the previous chapter. Although it\'s to be expected I\'m always perturbed when people complain about not being \"warned\". (I subsequently upped the warning). How many times do you buy a novel and inside the front cover is a list of warnings about the content contained within? This is an adult site. Things will happen to our characters that will be sexy, but also disturbing and brutal. Part of the adventure of reading is discovering those things and challenging your emotions on how you deal with them.

But I digress.

Please...continue along with me and these wonderful characters that I have borrowed from JK Rowling...

Chapter 13: The Pain of Longing

Hermione stood outside and gazed at the snow covered fields that sloped down and away from Hogwarts. The air was chilly but still and the sky was steely grey. The silence was almost deafening.

It was the morning after the horrendous night in Professor Snape’s apartments. Hermione was bruised and battered but her mind was intact and sharp. The cold air helped clear away the pain, sorrow and confusion and left her with a clear outlook on her situation, troubling as it was.

Focusing her gaze on nothing in particular she slowly allowed her brain to replay the aftermath of the brutal rape. When he was done with her, she dressed and fearfully entered his study. By then the rage had quieted and his face was ashen. She wondered vaguely if he was sorry for what he had done. But when he made the request for her to bring a virgin, she was appalled by his perversity. As soon as she opened her mouth to protest, he silenced her.

“I will hear none of your babbling,” Snape says in a tired voice. “You will listen to me.”

Hermione shifts uncomfortably in her chair.

“Obviously that potion was strong and you threw yourself wantonly at that miserable Potter. Couldn’t keep your legs shut for a minute, could you?” Snape spits out. “You’re weaker than I thought.”

“But, sir…the potion…”

“Silence!”

Snape leans back in his chair and lets out a long sigh. “Regardless, you are not a virgin and not by my hand. So…you will find a virgin and bring her to me in two weeks time. I know you girls talk so it shouldn’t be hard to find someone still intact.”

“And what if I won’t?” Hermione says in a small voice. She is trembling now.

Snape narrows his eyes at her. “Then you will see just how angry I can become.” He leans forward and his gaze is penetrating. “I will do everything in my power to ruin you, Miss Granger. Expulsion to begin with then I will see that you never, ever find a position of any consequence. You’ll be disgraced forever. And those muggle parents of yours…”

Hermione gasps and stands up. “Don’t you dare!” she yells.

Snape’s mouth curls into an evil grin. “Don’t tempt me.”

Off in the distance a handful of ravens took to the air and the noise pulled Hermione out of her thoughts. Despite the warm clothes she wore, she trembled. In her mind two paths were at war with each other. As always, she contemplated right and wrong and wanted to do what was right. What was right was to go to Dumbledore and explain the whole thing. What was wrong was to bring Snape what he wanted. In return he promised to lay a memory charm on her so she would forget that horrible night. It was tempting.

As much as Hermione wanted to do the right thing, she knew it would cause a huge stir in the school. She would be pitted against Snape in the classic battle of “he said she said”. A professor’s word would always win in the end, she thought bitterly. And from there she would be ruined.

It was much easier to sacrifice a virgin and walk out of there not remembering a thing, but the thought disgusted her just the same.

“There you are,” came a soft voice from behind. It was Harry.

Hermione stood still and waited until Harry walked around to face her.

“Are you alright?” he asked anxiously.

She nodded.

“I wanted to talk to you yesterday…after the match, but…”

“It’s ok, I understand,” she said in a tired voice.

“No, it’s not. After all that had happened to you Friday night…I should have been there. But I didn’t see you at dinner and then you had detention and…” Harry stopped. “Why are you crying?”

Hermione felt her insides clench and turn over when Harry mentioned the detention. She wanted to blurt out everything in hopes that Harry could think of something and save the day. After all hadn’t he gone against Voldemort and was still alive today? Instead she sniffed and hastily wiped her tears away.

“It’s nothing…just tired from…everything.”

But Harry stood looking at her with those eyes. The eyes she died for many times in her dreams. All she wanted at that moment was for Harry to take her into his arms and tell her he would take care of everything. But instead he stood there looking at her with an uncomfortable expression on his face.

“Do you have any idea who would have done something like that to you?” he asked.

Of course she did, but she couldn’t say. “No, maybe it was just a prank that backfired,” she said.

“I, um, I know you were under the influence the other night,” he began awkwardly. “So, if you feel embarrassed about what happened, I understand. Nothing needs to come of it.”

The anger inside Hermione rose and threatened to boil over. She clenched her jaw and tried to be civil.

“Of course. Just a lapse in judgment, that’s all,” she choked out.

Harry looked relieved. “I’m sorry I lost my control that night,” he said, laughing nervously. “I would have never done that but you; well you kinda gave me no choice.”

When she didn’t reply, he stumbled on. “Besides, I guess you probably know, but I really fancy Ginny and I was going to ask her out.”

Hermione wanted to scream but she fought it.

“So, we’re still friends, right? I mean I wouldn’t want this to come between us,” Harry said.

“Yes, absolutely,” she lied. “I wouldn’t want to get in the way of romance.”

“But you are ok, aren’t you?” he asked.

“I’ll survive.”

“I told Malfoy I’d kill him if he talked,” Harry said. “Well not quite kill, but you get the idea.”

“That’s good of you,” she said and she slowly began to feel dead inside.

“Alright then,” Harry said, taking her mitten-clad hand. “We should go inside. It’s pretty cold.”

Hermione allowed herself to be led inside and the suddenly the path was clear.

+ + +

Professor Snape closed the book he had been reading. It was useless trying to concentrate now. Instead he reached for the brandy that had given him a nasty hangover the night before. Might as well dull the pain, he thought and took a long swallow.

There were two types of pain attacking him that day. One was the pain of knowing you did something very, very wrong. And the other was the pain that one experiences when they want something very, very much. Both were at war with each other, much like Hermione’s own internal struggles between right and wrong.

Snape thought about the previous night with mixed emotions. Although it brought him perverse satisfaction to see Hermione in bondage, he was awash with guilt over his actions once he found out she was no longer a virgin. Not only did he assault her body, but also her mind when he invaded it to see who had deflowered her before him. Now, rage dissipated, he was consumed with self loathing.

One the other side of the coin festered a longing for another encounter with Hermione. But this time it would be different. Much different. She would see the side of him that no one else saw. He could be dominant and passionate at the same time. His time with whores had not been a complete folly. They showed him what women wanted and like the good student he was, he took it all in.

Not that he had a chance to practice, but he remembered and he knew he could do it.

Snape sighed and stood up. He needed to pace and think. There was still the matter of his quest, he thought. Granger could come later if need be. Once he had the virgin in hand he would fulfill his promise to wipe her memory. Then he would be free to woo her and have her again on different terms.

For the hundredth time he cursed his own ineptness at the potion. If only he hadn’t been interrupted that evening, he could have mixed it correctly, got the virgin blood and been on his way to immortality. Ignoring the hour, he consoled himself with more brandy.

He cursed the potion that required a virgin witch. It would have been so easy to charm a muggle girl and take what he needed. But after countless hours translating the instructions, he knew he read it correctly.

“Damn it all,” Snape cursed to the empty room.

As he paced he let his mind wander back to Hermione. But this time he was kissing her passionately and cupping one firm breast with his hand and she was stroking him and…

He stopped in front of his bookcase and there rested a book he hadn’t looked at in a very long time. In fact, he didn’t realize he still had it. It was a muggle book, just a slim volume really. He pulled it out and the words haunted him. No, he thought, he wouldn’t wait. The pain of longing won him over.