The Princess Bride of Hogwarts
folder
Harry Potter › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
15
Views:
2,463
Reviews:
19
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
15
Views:
2,463
Reviews:
19
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter 11
Chapter 11
A few minutes of silence had gone by when Harry spoke again. “Bring the body.”
“The body?”
“Do you have any money Hagrid?”
“A little bit. Why?”
“I’m hoping to buy us a miracle.”
With that Harry started up and out of the tree with Hagrid carrying the man in black under his arm.
--------------------
After walking a ways Harry stopped outside a house and knocked on the door. Receiving no answer Harry knocked again only louder. Repeating the process a couple more times they finally got a response. A small window type thing in the door opened. The man who opened up lookt Hat Harry then Hagrid and the man in black.
Without waiting for the man to speak Harry quickly asked, “Are you the miracle Ron who worked for the king all those years?”
The man sized up Harry again before speaking. “So what if I was? The kings idiot excuse for a son fired me. And thank-you for bringing up such a painful subject. While your at it why don’t you just give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice on it. We’re closed.” With that Ron slammed the window in the door closed.
Aggravated at his response Harry began banging on the door again. Ron opened the door, “Go away or I’ll call the brute squad.”
“I’m on the brute squad.” Hagrid said.
“You are the brute squad?” Ron questioned.
“We need a miracle.” said Harry.
“I don’t do that anymore.” Ron said “Besides why would you want someone the moronic prince fired. I might kill whoever you wanted me to miracle.”
“He’s already dead.” said Harry.
“He is huh? Well come on bring him in I’ll have a look.” Ron opened the door and ushered them in.
---------------------
Hermione was sitting at her vanity putting on a necklace when Malfoy came up behind her.
“Happy aou?”ou?” Malfoy asked.
“Why, should I be?” Hermione said back.
“Brides often are, I’m told.”
“I will not marry tonight. My Severus will save me.” Hermione said then left. She didn’t see the evil grin Malfoy had plastered to his face.
---------------------
Ron was busy examining Severus’s body when Harry said in a low voice, “Sir.” Having not heard Harry, Harry said again but slightly louder, “Sir, we’re in a terrible rush.”
Ron looked up. “Don’t rush me. You rush me you will get rotten miracles.”
Ron went to get a bellows clamp. “Open his mouth.” Harry opened Severus’s mouth. Ron put the end of the bellows clamp in Severus’s mouth and started pumping it. A couple of times of this and Ron took the clamp out of Severus’s mouth sta started poking at Severus.
“Hey there. Hello. Anyone home?”
Harry found this odd. “He’s dead he can’t talk.”
“Oh look who knows so much. As it is your friend is it? Well he’s only mostly dead. Thereld bld be a huge difference between mostly dead and all dead.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Mostly dead, that’s slightly alive. All dead, well the best you can do there is go through is close and look for loose change.” Ron was about to go asking Severus questions again when Harry started talking more.
“What are you doing? You can’t talk to him even if he is ‘mostly dead’.”
“So you think you’re the big bad miracle man huh? Well be my guest then. You make a miracle to make him better.”
Harry just stood there awkwardly. “Just what I thought.” Ron said. Turning back to Severus he asked him some questions. “Hey there. What’s so important here? What do you have so grand that’s worth living for?”
Ron pressed lightly on Severus’s chest. Severus breathed out, “True love.”
“True love. See that’s what he’s got going for him. Now fix him.” Harry said.
“Yes, such a wonderful thing true love is, the best thing and it takes no money to have. But alas where love has no price tag miracles do. How much do you have?”
“65.”
“I have never worked for so little. Sorry, true love or not this is a no go.”
“WHAT? He has true love waiting for him and you won’t heal him because you won’t work for such a low price. That’s wrong. Very wr” Ha” Harry exclaimed.
“True as that might be it is still a no go so move along.”
Abruptly Harry had a thought. “His true love is the princess. If you heal him he will stop Malfoy’s wedding.”
That stopped Ron dead in his tracks. “What’s that you say? Fixing him will annoy Malfoy! Of course I’ll do it.* Give me your money.”
Ron went about making a pill for Severus to swallow. He had put a chocolate coating on it commenting that it makes the pill go down easier, not to mention that you shouldn’t go swimming for at least an hour afterward.
Harry and Hagrid thanked Ron as they left. Ron followed them out telling them to have fun storming the castle.
-------------------------
Harry and Hagrid carrying Severus had found a perch up on one of the castle walls. Harry and Hagrid looked down into the courtyard below, as they did so Hagrid said, “That’s more then thirty.”
Harry took one last look at the men below. “What’s the difference? We have him now.” Harry said pointing to Severus. Leaning Severus up on the wall Harry told Hagrid to open Severus’s mouth. Once Hagrid had done that Harry kissed the pill hoping it would worhey hey then force fed Severus the pill.
“How long do we have to wait before we know the miracle worked?” questioned Hagrid.
“Your guess is as good as mine.” Harry said back.
Just then Severus’s eyes popped open. Severus was talking very loudly so Hagrid clamped a hand over his mouth, indicating for him to hush his vo Onc Once Hagrid removed his hand Severus poured out several questions in a rapid succession. Harry to flustered to answer one question at a time summed everything up into a nice and neat explanation.
“So what your telling me is that we have less then a few hours to storm the castle, steal Hermione, then escape after you kill the count. All this and I can‘t even move my arms…or my legs.”
“Yes, well yes.” said Harry quietly.
“This is just perfect.” Severus sarcastically declared. “What are our assets?”
“Your brains, Hagrid’s strength, and my steel.” Harry replied.
Severus just shook his head. “You just shook your head. That doesn’t make you happy?” Hagrid asked.
Severus looked at Hagrid. “My brains, your strength, and his steel are all we have to get into a heavily guarded castle and you think a little head jiggle is supposed to make me happy?”
Hagrid grinned at him. “If only we had a wheelbarrow.”
Harry looked to Hagrid. “Where did we put that wharroarrow that albino had?”
“Over the albino I think.” Hagrid answered back.
Thoroughly annoyed Severus spoke, “Why didn’t you list that among our assets in the first place?” he sighed, “What I wouldn’t give for a holocaust cloak.”
“There we can’t help you.” Harry said.
Hagrid pulled something from his shirt. “Will this help?”
Harry looked at Hagrid, “Where did you get that?”
“At Miracle Ron’s. It fit so nice he said I could keep it.”
Severus interrupted them. “As nice as this chat is we really do need to collect our supplies.”
They carefully got up one by one. Harry in front with Severus leaning against him. Hagrid following behind them.
“Harry.” asked Hagrid.
“What?”
“I hope we win.”
**********
* roughly based on the suggestion made by rANDOM rEVIEWER.
There you have it. Two chapters in one day. Whoo hoo!! At this rate I’ll have the rest of the story posted before the night ends. Again I will take the time to thank my reviewers.
Thank-you greatly to Paprika, PrideandPrejudice, Me, oz_angel21, ShodanHalo, Andrian, rANDOM rEVIWER, Zoe, Rose, and a very special thank-you to my first flamer, so thanks a bunch Anon! And thanks a million to the rest of you who read this. =)
A few minutes of silence had gone by when Harry spoke again. “Bring the body.”
“The body?”
“Do you have any money Hagrid?”
“A little bit. Why?”
“I’m hoping to buy us a miracle.”
With that Harry started up and out of the tree with Hagrid carrying the man in black under his arm.
--------------------
After walking a ways Harry stopped outside a house and knocked on the door. Receiving no answer Harry knocked again only louder. Repeating the process a couple more times they finally got a response. A small window type thing in the door opened. The man who opened up lookt Hat Harry then Hagrid and the man in black.
Without waiting for the man to speak Harry quickly asked, “Are you the miracle Ron who worked for the king all those years?”
The man sized up Harry again before speaking. “So what if I was? The kings idiot excuse for a son fired me. And thank-you for bringing up such a painful subject. While your at it why don’t you just give me a nice paper cut and pour lemon juice on it. We’re closed.” With that Ron slammed the window in the door closed.
Aggravated at his response Harry began banging on the door again. Ron opened the door, “Go away or I’ll call the brute squad.”
“I’m on the brute squad.” Hagrid said.
“You are the brute squad?” Ron questioned.
“We need a miracle.” said Harry.
“I don’t do that anymore.” Ron said “Besides why would you want someone the moronic prince fired. I might kill whoever you wanted me to miracle.”
“He’s already dead.” said Harry.
“He is huh? Well come on bring him in I’ll have a look.” Ron opened the door and ushered them in.
---------------------
Hermione was sitting at her vanity putting on a necklace when Malfoy came up behind her.
“Happy aou?”ou?” Malfoy asked.
“Why, should I be?” Hermione said back.
“Brides often are, I’m told.”
“I will not marry tonight. My Severus will save me.” Hermione said then left. She didn’t see the evil grin Malfoy had plastered to his face.
---------------------
Ron was busy examining Severus’s body when Harry said in a low voice, “Sir.” Having not heard Harry, Harry said again but slightly louder, “Sir, we’re in a terrible rush.”
Ron looked up. “Don’t rush me. You rush me you will get rotten miracles.”
Ron went to get a bellows clamp. “Open his mouth.” Harry opened Severus’s mouth. Ron put the end of the bellows clamp in Severus’s mouth and started pumping it. A couple of times of this and Ron took the clamp out of Severus’s mouth sta started poking at Severus.
“Hey there. Hello. Anyone home?”
Harry found this odd. “He’s dead he can’t talk.”
“Oh look who knows so much. As it is your friend is it? Well he’s only mostly dead. Thereld bld be a huge difference between mostly dead and all dead.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Mostly dead, that’s slightly alive. All dead, well the best you can do there is go through is close and look for loose change.” Ron was about to go asking Severus questions again when Harry started talking more.
“What are you doing? You can’t talk to him even if he is ‘mostly dead’.”
“So you think you’re the big bad miracle man huh? Well be my guest then. You make a miracle to make him better.”
Harry just stood there awkwardly. “Just what I thought.” Ron said. Turning back to Severus he asked him some questions. “Hey there. What’s so important here? What do you have so grand that’s worth living for?”
Ron pressed lightly on Severus’s chest. Severus breathed out, “True love.”
“True love. See that’s what he’s got going for him. Now fix him.” Harry said.
“Yes, such a wonderful thing true love is, the best thing and it takes no money to have. But alas where love has no price tag miracles do. How much do you have?”
“65.”
“I have never worked for so little. Sorry, true love or not this is a no go.”
“WHAT? He has true love waiting for him and you won’t heal him because you won’t work for such a low price. That’s wrong. Very wr” Ha” Harry exclaimed.
“True as that might be it is still a no go so move along.”
Abruptly Harry had a thought. “His true love is the princess. If you heal him he will stop Malfoy’s wedding.”
That stopped Ron dead in his tracks. “What’s that you say? Fixing him will annoy Malfoy! Of course I’ll do it.* Give me your money.”
Ron went about making a pill for Severus to swallow. He had put a chocolate coating on it commenting that it makes the pill go down easier, not to mention that you shouldn’t go swimming for at least an hour afterward.
Harry and Hagrid thanked Ron as they left. Ron followed them out telling them to have fun storming the castle.
-------------------------
Harry and Hagrid carrying Severus had found a perch up on one of the castle walls. Harry and Hagrid looked down into the courtyard below, as they did so Hagrid said, “That’s more then thirty.”
Harry took one last look at the men below. “What’s the difference? We have him now.” Harry said pointing to Severus. Leaning Severus up on the wall Harry told Hagrid to open Severus’s mouth. Once Hagrid had done that Harry kissed the pill hoping it would worhey hey then force fed Severus the pill.
“How long do we have to wait before we know the miracle worked?” questioned Hagrid.
“Your guess is as good as mine.” Harry said back.
Just then Severus’s eyes popped open. Severus was talking very loudly so Hagrid clamped a hand over his mouth, indicating for him to hush his vo Onc Once Hagrid removed his hand Severus poured out several questions in a rapid succession. Harry to flustered to answer one question at a time summed everything up into a nice and neat explanation.
“So what your telling me is that we have less then a few hours to storm the castle, steal Hermione, then escape after you kill the count. All this and I can‘t even move my arms…or my legs.”
“Yes, well yes.” said Harry quietly.
“This is just perfect.” Severus sarcastically declared. “What are our assets?”
“Your brains, Hagrid’s strength, and my steel.” Harry replied.
Severus just shook his head. “You just shook your head. That doesn’t make you happy?” Hagrid asked.
Severus looked at Hagrid. “My brains, your strength, and his steel are all we have to get into a heavily guarded castle and you think a little head jiggle is supposed to make me happy?”
Hagrid grinned at him. “If only we had a wheelbarrow.”
Harry looked to Hagrid. “Where did we put that wharroarrow that albino had?”
“Over the albino I think.” Hagrid answered back.
Thoroughly annoyed Severus spoke, “Why didn’t you list that among our assets in the first place?” he sighed, “What I wouldn’t give for a holocaust cloak.”
“There we can’t help you.” Harry said.
Hagrid pulled something from his shirt. “Will this help?”
Harry looked at Hagrid, “Where did you get that?”
“At Miracle Ron’s. It fit so nice he said I could keep it.”
Severus interrupted them. “As nice as this chat is we really do need to collect our supplies.”
They carefully got up one by one. Harry in front with Severus leaning against him. Hagrid following behind them.
“Harry.” asked Hagrid.
“What?”
“I hope we win.”
**********
* roughly based on the suggestion made by rANDOM rEVIEWER.
There you have it. Two chapters in one day. Whoo hoo!! At this rate I’ll have the rest of the story posted before the night ends. Again I will take the time to thank my reviewers.
Thank-you greatly to Paprika, PrideandPrejudice, Me, oz_angel21, ShodanHalo, Andrian, rANDOM rEVIWER, Zoe, Rose, and a very special thank-you to my first flamer, so thanks a bunch Anon! And thanks a million to the rest of you who read this. =)