ORIGINAL: The Amour

Disclaimer: All characters and setting belong to JK. Rowling.


[Chapter Twelve]

Harry felt like he’d been torn to pieces. Feeling confused, betrayed, and hurt, he slumped to the ground limply.

So Draco had seen his kiss with Cho. He felt awful. No, awful didn’t even come close to describing his feelings. Even if he hadn’t meant anything with that kiss, he knew that he’d hurt Draco immensely.

But Draco had got it all wrong. He hadn’t been cheating on him. He’d never even touched or let along talked to her since they’d broken up.

Somehow, he had to tell Draco that.

A tear dropped onto his hand and he realized that he was crying. Draco meant everything to him. He couldn’t imagine a life without him

A soft rustling sounded from behind him and startled, he stood up.

“D-Draco?” he whispered hopefully.

“No, it’s me Harry.” a tall figure with sandy hair stepped out from the shadows.
“Seamus! What are you doing here?” Harry asked worriedly.

“Harry... I’m-I’m sorry about Draco.”

Harry’s eyes widened in surprise.

“You heard- our conversation?”

“Well, yeah. I’m sorry Harry... I didn’t mean to listen but I saw you come up here and I couldn’t help but be curious about what you were doing....” he paused at the stricken look on Harry face. “But I knew about you and Draco already.”

“What? H-how?”

Seamus ignored the question and went on.

“I want you to know something about him. What he accused you of is complete bullshit. For one, I know for a fact that you’ve never cheated on him with Cho and for another, he’s just blaming you and using you as an excuse.”

Harry stared hard at him. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“Harry, I found out that Draco has thing going on with Blaise Zabini. A Slytherin housemate said that they saw Zabini go into Draco’s room a number of times-”

“Stop!” Harry covered his ears frantically. “No! That’s not true! I don’t want to hear it!” It couldn’t be true. Not his Draco.

Seamus reached out a firm hand and gripped Harry’s shoulder.

“Harry, listen to me. I know it’s painful but you’ve done nothing wrong! It’s Malfoy that’s been betraying you! He used you as an excuse!”

“No!” Harry screamed again, sobbing. “No! No, no, no no....”

“I’m sorry I had to tell you this Harry, but I didn’t want you to suffer through it, thinking that you were the one that did wrong. You did nothing Harry. He’s just blaming you.” Seamus pulled Harry’s hands away from his face gently. “Look at me Harry.”

Harry, tears running down his face, saw Seamus gazing at him with gleaming eyes. The hazel eyes wended their way deeply into Harry’s own eyes and for a moment, he forgot why he was there and why he was crying.

“Harry, I care too much for you to get hurt. And if Malfoy thinks that he can do that easily, I’ll kill him. Because... I love you Harry.”

Harry was speechless. His mouth went dry with surprise and he felt lost. Completely lost.

Seamus hugged Harry tightly and nuzzled his nose into Harry’s messy hair.

“I’ve felt this way for a long time. But I could never tell you... I never had the guts to...” he whispered softly. “I want to be with you.”

A wave of emotions swept over his insides as he stood there, embraced by Seamus’ warm body. His bruised heart felt comforted by the kindness and affection of his words. He’d never have guessed for real, that the Gryffindor Team Captain had feelings for him and the shock was somewhat enchanting.

“Seamus....” he said weakly. “I-I...”

“Please don’t reject me Harry. Please. Say that you’ll let me be yours.”

If Seamus loved him so much, who was he to refuse? Draco didn’t love him. Draco didn’t give a shit about what Harry felt at all. Harry didn’t really love Seamus in return but that would come in time. He was sure. And plus, he need someone to help him mend his injured soul...

With trembling lips, he kissed Seamus’ mouth nervously. Seamus responded immediately and with eagerness and bliss radiating out of every pore.

“I love you Harry.”

And Harry let himself be sowedowed into Seamus’ passion, burying the memory of Draco far, far away.
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Days and weeks went by and the old tension between Draco and Harry that had first been there after their break-up was slowly fading away. Draco learned to once more draw heavy curtains around his heart, and his icy and malign self had seemingly returned. He snapped at everyone, shot insults at ient ent passerby’s, and aggravated everyone that wasn’t a pureblood.

Harry on the other hand, was still muddled inside. His new relationship with Seamus was still kept a secret. Seamus had wanted to act normally in front of everyone but Harry had objected and pleaded that they just act like friends when others were around. He felt that he still wasn’t quite ready to make another commitment about love.

He’d convinced himself that he was finally over Draco and that he was in love with Seamus. Seamus was kind and gentle and caring. And what’s more, he loved Harry back. Unlike Draco.
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Blaise was still Draco-less and he was getting desperate. His plan hadn’t worked the way he thought it’d work. He’d expected Draco to come running into his arms after breaking up with Harry, but Draco was still stubborn and unrelenting to him.

Although the outside of the blonde boy had returned to his old self, he could see that the cold gray eyes were empty. Unemotional. The gleam had gone, the sparkle had gone. Harry Potter had not disappeared from Draco’s mind. He’d merely faded away.

He wanted Draco, yes. But he was going to force his patients to endure until Draco had healed his wound.
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It was Sunday night and exactly Harry and Seamus’ two week anniversary, or so Seamus wanted to call it. He’d snuck some drinks into the boy’s dormitory for a little celebration since the other boys wouldn’t be returning to for another couple of hours. They were all out snogging with girls in the common room.

Harry was grinning when Seamus gave him a small box.

“It’s a present for you Harry. To show you how much I love you.”

Harry opened the box and gasped when he saw a stunning gold ring with a black stone embedded in it. The stone sparkled mysteriously in the dim candlelight.

“Wow Seam! This is beautiful!” he breathed. “Thank you so much!”

Seamus smiled, pleased at the surprised look on Harry’s gentle face. He leaned in and kissed Harry.

“Let’s drink. Cheers Harry.” he raised his glass to Harry’s and drained it in one swig.

rry rry giggled and let the fiery drink trickle down his throat. It felt
wonderful.

Soon, they’d emptied nearly five bottles and both were feeling extremely tipsy.


“I’m getting sleepy Seamus.” Harry slurred, seeing a blurry Seamus through his heavy eyelids. “Maybe we should-”

Suddenly, Seamus threw himself at Harry. Harry yelped.

“Wh-what are you doing Seam?” he said drunkenly. His brain wasn’t understanding what was hningning to him.

Seamus’ sloppy lips were all over Harry’s body. He ripped his and Harry’s clothing off and forced the raven haired boy onto his bed. He dizzily muttered the silencing charm and lowered his body onto Harry’s.

“S-Seam?” Harry asked nervously.

But his lover wasn’t listening. His strong hands were pinning Harry onto the bed and his legs were rubbing against Harry’s hungrily.

Harry was about to ask again when an excruciating pain that he’d never felt before pierced his lower body.

“AAAAAHHHH!” he screamed. The torturing pain was slicing repeatedly in his groin as Seamus’ body pumped up and down over him.

What was happening? He no longer felt so inebriated. The realization of what was happening was beginning to sink in.

“No! No!” he cried out desperately, trying to push Seamus’ body away from his. “Seam! No! Don’t do this! Please!”

But it was too late. Seamus had gone past the line that Harry had drawn to protect himself. Tears of pain and nausea filled his eyes and he whimpered hesslessly. He closed his eyes and let his body go. Numbness spread over him and he just lay there, feeling Seamus inside him but at the same time, feeling nothingness.

With a groan of pleasure, Seamus released himself into Harry and collapsed on him.

“That was great Harry.” Seamus said, cuddling into his body. “Let’s do it again soon.”

Harry winced and let out a dry sob. But Seamus didn’t hear. He was already asleep.

He felt dirty. Disgusting. Repulsive. This was not how their night was supposed to turn out. It was supposed to be a romantic night together, and what just happened was anything but romantic. It was sick. Harry felt sick. He was sure that he was going to throw up sooner or later.

He cried himself to sleep.

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The next morning, he was awoken by the sound of someone calling his name.


He opened one bleary eye and his head rammed with pain.

“Ow!” he groaned trying to roll over. But the he saw Seamus sleeping naked next to him under the covers and the whole night returned to him. He looked down at his arms and saw red and purple bruises where Seamus had restrained him. He quickly hid them under the sheets. His body was shaking uncontrollably.

“Harry? You there?” he heard Ron’s voice calling him from somewhere in the room. He heard the sound of hangings being pulled and a gasp. “H-Harry! What the fuck are you d-doing in Seamus’ bed?”

“Ron? Is Harry in here?”

Oh no. Harry moaned inwardly as he closed his eyes. He heard another shout of surprise.

“What the- are they... sleeping together?” Dean asked incredulously.

“Harry?” Ron called again.

Harry opened his eyes and his cheeks flushed as he looked at Ron’s shocked face.

“Were you drunk?”

Harry bit his lip and nodded.

“Oh.”

“Are you guys... like.... together?”

Harry nodded again, blushing even more furiously.

“You-you’re gay?”

“Come on Ron. Don’t pester him anymore. What’s wrong with being homosexual?” Dean asked sharply, trying to yank Ron back.

“N-nothing... it’s just that.... wow. I mean. Er- I never knew that Harry was... that Seamus was....” Ron stuttered. “Why have you been keeping it a secret?”

Harry managed to sit up, holding his head in agony. “We-we didn’t want to tell anyone because we thought that people would accept our relationship.” he looked up. “Why aren’t you mad at me?”

Ron frowned. “Mad at you? What do you mean?”

“About Cho.”

Ron’s ears went red. “Oh, er... well.... the thing is.... I erm...”

Dean grinned widely and nudged Ron in the ribs.

“He’s going out with Hermione now, that’s what.”

“What?” it was Harry’s turn to exclaim in surprise but he recoiled when another headache attacked him. “How? When? Why?”

Ron looked away, face as red as a tomato. “Well... last night... we got kind of drunk and... well, she kinda told me how- how she felt about me and to be honest I always liked her too, but I never thought that she’d ever like me in the same way so I never told her.... and...”

“They snogged.”

“Dean!” Ron roared, punching Dean on the arm. “Shut up!”

“But you tried to rape Cho!” Harry said remembering the reason for the fight between the three in the first place.

Ron blanched. “What the fuck? Who ever said that?”

“Cho. The day you guys broke up. She said that you tried to rape her and hurt her.”

“I did no such fucking thing!”

“But she was crying her eyes out Ron!”

“Well fuck her because I never did more then kiss her! And she never let me kiss her if other people weren’t around!”

Harry’s head was killing him. “But why would she lie about something like that?”

“I don’t bloody know but I can’t believe that you would think that I’d do something like that!” Ron fumed.

“Well you weren’t exactly being amiable with me either, remember?” Harry said coldly.

“I-I’m sorry about that Harry... I was jealous that you always got all the girls and everything....” Ron said regretfully. “I’m sorry, mate.”

At that moment, Seamus stirred in the bed next to him.

“Ugh. Bad. Bad. Head.... Ow.” he mumbled incoherently as he tried to sit up.

He opened his eyes and saw the three boys looking at him with curious eyes. He looked at Harry and his eyes shot wide open. Harry was naked. And in his bed. He hastily looked down and realized that he was just as stark naked.

“Oh fuck.” he hissed. “Shit.... Harry?”

Harry avoided Seamus’ eyes. It was too painful to look at him.

Harry’s attitude confirmed everything for Seamus. His mouth dropped open and he wrapped the sheets around himself.

Dean was the one that broke the awkward mood by giving out a whistle.

“Why do you guys looked so miserable? You guys should be happy! You know, sex is just the first step in a good relationship.” he grinned.

Seamus managed a weak smile. “Harry- I-I’m really sorry...”

Keeping his head bowed, Harry shook his head. “It’s okay Seam. We were both drunk.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, it’s fine. Hey we should all get breakfast.” he said, trying to sound cheerful. Carefully, hiding the marks on his arms, he grabbed his boxers from the foot of the bed and put them on. Then he got out of Seamus’ bed and went over to his own four poster.

“Geez Harry! I might just go gay for your body.” Dean said teasingly.

“Hey! Don’t you dare! Harry’s mine!” Seamus said, taking a swipe at his best friend.

Harry blushed all over again and tried to shut their voices out as he grabbed a towel from his trunk.

“I’m gonna go take a shower.” he said over his back as he hasted out
of the room.

The warm water on his sensitive skin felt incredibly soothing. His body ached all over and he noticed that his thighs were covered in bruises too. There was an bright red bite mark on his neck too.

How could I have let that happen? He leaned his forehead against the smooth tiles and closed his eyes. I didn’t even let Draco... NO. Thinking about Draco was not an option. He’d forbid his own mind not to think about the Slytherin ever since they’d broken up.

He hadn’t wanted his first to be like last night. He’d always dreamed that sex was something pleasurable and loving, and that he would do it when the time was right. With the right person. Last night had just been... nothing more than a nightmare. He felt broken and empty.

And now Seamus would think that Harry was okay with sex since they’d done it once. But truth be told, he wasn’t. He was scared of it. He just wanted to disappear all together.

Slowly, he got out of the shower and dried himself off. The other’s were probably waiting for him.

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