Shattered

Shattered

By Adriana

trixielou60@hotmail.com

For life, with all its yield of joy and woe,

And hope and fear-- believe the aged friend --

Is just the chance o' the prize of learning love,

How love might be, hath been indeed, and is;

And that we hold henceforth to the uttermost

Such prize despite the envy of the world,

And, having gained truth, keep truth: that is all.

~From the poem, "A Death in the Desert" by Robert Browning

********************************************

Chapter 11: Truth

"This can't be happening," Hermione thought dimly. The
surreal nature of her circumstance almost caused her to lose control, but she
fought hard to maintain it. "He needs me," she whispered to
herself. She focused her concentration on Severus.

As she knelt before him, she leaned over his face and immediately saw that
he had small blisters ad hid his nose and mouth. Mentally eliminating several
poisons, she frowned and brought her face even closer. She caught a whiff of a
distinctive, acrid smell. "Oh no!" she thought.

Tincture of calotropis.

Not only that, but that bitch had spelled Severus so that the poison was
permeating his skin. She could see the dark energy surrounding his body. If she
touched him, she could find herself overwhelmed by the toxic effects of the poison.
This was a spell designed to do some major damage.

Severus was a crumpled mass, and his lank hair had fallen in his face,
obscuring his eyes from her view. At the moment he'd been overcome by the
poison, his face had contorted into a mask of pain and fear. For the first time
ever, he looked as if he'd been caught by surprise. His colour was a terrible
bluish tint. Hermione had a hard time looking at him.

Heart pounding, she fought a feeling of panic. "What if I can't do
this?" she said to herself. Her hands began to shake. "This is
no time to lose it," she thought, resolutely. In the distance, she
could make out Ron and Draco shouting at each other. Briefly glancing over her
shoulder, she could see that Taryn had been immobilized and it appeared that
Draco and Ron were arguing over what to do with her. "They'll work it
out," her mind flickered.

Turning back quickly to her task, she cast a Shielding Charm around herself
and touched him for the first time. Feeling his pulse, she noted it to be
excruciatingly slow. "Antidote, antidote" . . . . she scanned
her mental database. As she watched him, his skin colour worsened and Hermione
uttered a quick spell to transform the air around him into pure oxygen.
"Breathe, Severus," she told him gently, and the air began to move
ints lus lungs. Hermione charmed it to move under pressure.

Suddenly, she remembered the antidote. Belladona! Hermione knew that
Severus kept a supply in the storeroom. "Accio Belladonna!" she
shouted and, as quick as a snitch, the vial was in her hand. Frantically
scanning the mess in the lshe she found one of Severus' quills, next to a
broken piece of glass. Remembering her battlefield training, Hermione
transfigured the quill into a syringe and the piece of glass into a rubber
tourniquet.

"I know you'll forgive my Muggle ways, Severus," she murmured, as
she tied the tourniquet around his upper arm. "I have to get this antidote
into you fast." She withdrew the Belladonna into the syringe, and
carefully measuring it, she injected it into his vein.

"Please, God," she breathed. "Let this work!" She began
to shakily chant a spell designed to make his body and mind more receptive to
the healing.

There was no telling how much poison he'd ingested.

*******************************************************

"Life is a funny thing," thought Draco, as he moved towards
Ron Weasley. All these juxtapositions were threatening to permanently disorient
him. One minute he's on his broom, the next, Voldemort is yanking his hair. One
minute he's draped across a chair and the next, he's wrestling an assassin with
a goody- two-shoes Gryffindor.

"It's a wonder I'm not barmy," he thought.

" her her fucking wand, you pillock!" yelled Ron.

"No need to be rude, you stupid cow! I don't have to even touch her . .
. Petrificus Totalus!" Draco shouted with a dramatic flair.

Taryn Butler immediately froze, teetering precariously.

"And you call yourself a wizard, Weasley?" With a curl of his lip,
Draco put a hand on Taryn, pushing her over. She landed with a satisfying crash
on the floor.

Ron straightened up to his full, impressive height, red-faced, short of
breath and sweating profusely. "She's well trained," he said. "I
would have overpowered her . . . eventually." Draco snorted.

"What were you doing here, Weasley?"

Ron let out an incomprehensible mumble.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you."

"I said, I'll explain later, it's a very long story! We've got other
things to worry about."

They both looked at Taryn.

"What do you suppose we should do with her, Malfoy?"

"I don't know. Maybe we should hang her by her big toes and cast a
tickling charm on her until she pukes on your shoes."

Ron gave him his best sneer. "Same old smart-arsed git, aren't you?
What's wrong, can't you think of anything useful?"

"Of course I can. Don't you realize what a coup this is? Taryn Butler
is one of Voldemort's most trusted Death Eaters . . . she'd have to be, for him
to give her such an assignment. Think of the information! A few minutes with me
and I'll have her squealing like a pig." He gave his most charming smile.

"Torture is a specialty of mine," he said proudly.

"Trust you to brag about something like that. But you're right about
one thing. She has to know a lot of his sts. ts. As much as I'd love to see her
get the Dementor's Kiss, we'll have to extract information from her. I'm sure
you could do the honors, Malfoy."

"Actually, I hate torture, it's very messy. I'll leave that to the
Ministry experts. But I can give pointers!"

Ron shook his head in exasperation and tiredly rubbed his eyes. "We
have to infohe Hhe Headmaster."

"I suppose you're right," sighed Draco. Walking over to Hermione
he asked, "How's Uncle Severus?" He couldn't keep the anxiety of
of
his voice, as much as he tried. Hermione had never seen that look on Draco's
face before. If she didn't know better, she would have thought it to be the
barest flicker of fear.

"He's stable, but I still don't know if he's going to survive,"
she answered quietly. "It depends on how well he responds to the antidote.
I'm moving him to his chambers . . . we can't take him to the hospital wing.
Nobody can know about this yet. I can get everything I need from the Potions
Lab."

"Yes but first things, first," said Draco. Bending over Taryn, he
began to pat at her clothing. "It has to be here, somewhere," he
muttered to himself. "Ah ha!" He tugged on a garish silver ring on
her right hand. Pulling it off, he opened the jewel and took a sniff. He
grimaced.

"Ergh! Cyanide in a ring! How utterly, utterly predictable! So you were
planning to do the world a f by by committing suicide, were you? How noble!
Couldn't you and Voldie come up with anything better than this? Aside from the
fact that you tried to kill somebody very dear to me, I ought to kill you just
because you're bloody stupid!" he yelled.

The only things that moved on Taryn Butler's body were her eyes, and they
were slits of anger.

"Draco! This isn't helping!" Hermione's voice was pleading.

"I'm sorry, love. But I'm very angry." Turning to Ron he said,
"Watch over the prisoner, Corporal. I'm fetching Dumbledore." He
walked quickly from the room.

"Malfoys never run," he thought.

Hermione and Ron finally looked at each other. He’d only seen her briefly in
recent months and he quickly took in her fragile appearance. Ordinarily he
would have been concerned, but he knew that despite how she looked, she was all
steely strength underneath. She'd always been very strong, and she had been his
and Harry's rock throughout all their fights against Volrt. rt. He knelt with
her next to Severus.

"I don't know how you came to be here, Ron, but thank you," she
told him softly. Briefly glancing at Taryn Butler's still form on the floor she
added, "I can't deal with her. If I look at her, I'm going to want to hurt
her and I have to concentrate on Severus."

"Leave her to me, Hermione. I'll see to it that she pays for what she's
done. One way or another."

Hermione nodded, and pointing her wand at Severus, she murmured,
"Mobilicorpus!" He was gently lifted in the air. It was the second
time in her life that she'd seen him floating after that spell, but she was
determined to make this journey a more comfortable one. She carefully guided
him to a far wall of the lab and said,

"Serpens fortis."

An open doorway suddenly appeared and Hermione took Severus through the
entrance. She remembered the last time she'd been in his chambers, the night
that Poppy had died. She pushed that thought away quickly.

"He isn't going to die," she thought. "I w let let
him."

Before gently laying him on his bed, she removed his robes and boots,
lovingly caressing them as she laid them across a chair. Withdrawing her
crystal wand, she laid a comforting hand on his cheek and began to flick the
wand across his prone body. Gradually, the dark spell surrounding him began to
lighten and his color improved. He let out a deep sigh and appeared to rest
easier.

There was nothing more to do but wait. As there were no more spells and no
more healings to be done, the enormity of what had happened finally hit her
like a Weasley Twin Bludger. She began to shake and tears threatened to spill.
Her stomach was tied in a thousand knots and she fought a feeling of nausea.
Touching him without the Shielding Spell for the first time, she was relieved
to find his skin cool to her touch. As her hand lingered over his face, her
fingers caressed his lips. "Such full, sensuous lips, when they're not
stretched into a thin scowl," she thought. Her shaking began to
subside and she marveled how touching him had somehow healed some of her
physical distress. His complexion was rather waxy, but to Hermione, the sight
of him quietly breathing was one of the most beautiful things she'd ever seen.

Leaning closely to him, she continued to stroke his face. "Please
Severus. Don't die." The tears finally spilled.

"Don't leave me all alone," she whispered.

*****************************************************

Ron paced the Potions Lab, waiting for Albus and Draco to arrive. Patience
was never a Weasley virtue, although some of his siblings were blessed with more
of it than he'd ever been. What the hell! Did Malfoy stop at the opera on his
way to get Dumbledore? What was taking so long?

When Draco finally arrived with Albus, Ron was wholly unprepared for the
immediate verbal assault that greeted him.

"Alright, Weasley! I explained the situation to the Headmaster. Do you
think you could enlighten us as to how you came to be in the Potions Lab at the
exact moment Taryn Butler was trying to kill my uncle?"

"You look like a carp, you idiot. Just start at the beginning."

Ron sighed. This wasn't going to be easy. It was likely that several people
were going to want his head on a platter, starting with the Headmaster. He sat himself
down on totiootions Master's desk.

"Months ago," he began slowly, "Ministry Aurors began getting
very vague reports that a spy had either penetrated Hogwarts or was in the
process of penetrating the school. The intelligence came from deep underground
in Voldemort's organization and we weren't even sure if it was true. Nobody
could be certain of the reliability of the source, but one thing was clear. If
there was a mole at Hogwarts, many lives were threatened."

Albus curled a finger through his long white beard. "And nobody saw fit
to consult with me about this?" he asked quietly.

"I'm sorry, sir. I wanted to tell you, but I was under strict orders to
stay silent. My assignment came straight from top officials at the Ministry.
This information was so sensitive that nobody was to know about this . . . you
know how paranoid those in the spy business can be!"

Albus nodded. "No offense, Mr. Malfoy, Mr. Weasley, but I always found
spying to be a nasty undertaking. All that moral ambiguity is most confusing."

Ron looked relieved. "Well then, you can understand the level of panic
at the Ministry. We immediately thought of two possibilities as to who the spy
could be."

"Let me guess," said Draco dryly. "Me and Uncle Severus. How
come we Slytherins are always the first to be suspected of evil-doings?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe it's because you were both Death Eaters, you
poncey git!"

"Boys, boys," murmured the Headmaster.

"Anyway," Ron continued, "We ruled you out pretty early on,
Malfoy. You remember back in October, that night you were in The Boom Boom Room
and you couldn't stop pinching that brunette waitress on the arse?"

"You're going to have to be more specific, Weasley. There's a lot of
arses and a lot of pinching going on in that place."

"Well,was was in early October and you'd taken a liking to a new
waitress who was serving you drinks all night. What didndidn't know is that she
worked for the Ministry and while you were busy getting a lap dance, she poured
Veratiserum in your scotch. She was able to interrogate you and find out that
you were not the spy, and in fact, that you hate Voldemort and your father
almost as much as Harry does."

Draco looked stunned. "I think I remember that night. I'd had only a
couple of drinks, and then I couldn't remember anything. I thought I must have
been drunk, but then I knew I wasn't drunk, but then I couldn't remember. It
was all very confusing.t;

"We cast an Obliviate on you."

"Why you --" Draco went for Ron's throat. "What is it with
you Aurors and the Obliviate? Is that your answer to everything?" he
shouted.

Albus easily broke up the fight. "Gentlemen!" he thundered.
"s nos not important anymore! This is war and it's time to grow up!"

Draco and Ron looked ashamed. Mumbling an apology, Ron continued with the
story.

"So we knew it had to be someone else. When Professor Snape was unable
to prevent the attack at Hogsmeade, the Ministry became suspicious of him. It
was the perfect opportunity for Snape to switch sides and really work for
Voldemort. He always maintained that his cover was blown with the Death Eaters
and that he was useless to them now. But what if that was just an elaborate
ruse? What if he was really still working for the Dark ? We? We couldn't take
any chances . . . he was working with Hermione."

"So why didn't you use the Veritaserum on him? Or the Obliviate?"
Draco sounded petulant.

"Because he's a very, very powerful wizard, Malfoy. Nobody could be
certain that an Obliviate would even work on him. If he was really working for
Voldemort and he found out we were on to him, he could hurt a lot of people,
especially Hermione. So I was chosen to spy on him instead. I've been following
him and Hermione around for over a month, using Harry's invisibility cloak. It
started on their trip to Belize."

"You were in Belize?" Draco suddenly gave an evil grin.
"Hermione's going to kill you, Hermione's going to kill you," he
chanted in a sing-song voice. "Can I watch?"

"She's not going to kill me. She'll understand."

"If you think so, Weasley." Turning to the Headmaster, Draco
asked, "So what are we to do with Butler? I don't have to tell you how
important it is that we extract as much information from her as we can. I knew
that a woman was visiting Voldemort and was only able to catch a brief glance
at her and smell her perfume. When I was in the infirmary this evening, I
smelled that same perfume on Butler's cloak. It all made terrible sense,
although I have to say that I'm disturbed that the Dark Lord didn't confide in
me about this."

"Probably because he was trying to kill your uncle, Draco," said
the Headmaster gently. "And while I agree that Miss Butler should be
interrogated, we have to figure out a way to get information without tipping
off Voldemort. If he thinks that Miss Butler has been captured, he will change
his plans."

Albus looked thoughtful before continuing. "What if he believes Miss
Butler is dead? That she and Severus killed each other? You're in a unique
position to convince him of that, Mr. Malfoy."

"Convince Voldemort that his little pet, Taryn Butler, is dead at my
uncle's hands? He was very attached to her, he told me that she pleased him
very much. It will drive him absolutely barking."

"An added bonus," smiled the Headmaster. "So gentlemen, I
think it best we move Miss Butler to the dungeon in Remus' office . . . how
ironic that the same pit that held poor Alastor Moody should now hold
Voldemort's alpha-assassin! Quite fitting, don't you agree?"

"Headmaster," said Ron tentatively. "How is this going to
play out? I mean, who should know about this and who should be kept in the
dark? Butler's presence here is very sensitive."

"We'll be having a meeting of just the core members of The Order of The
Phoenix and we'll have to decide what to do at that time. Until then, nobody
outside Hermione and the three of us is to know what's happened here." He
held out his hand.

Putting their hands on top of Albus', the three of them vowed to keep silent
about what had occurred in that room.

**********************************************************

Ron, Draco and the Headmaster stopped at Severus' chamber to check on his
status before taking Taryn to the dungeons. Hermione told them that he appeared
to be a little bit better and that she was more optimistic about his chances.
Albus looked markedly relieved at the news.

Thinking they'd all left the room, Hermione turned back to Severus and
continued to speak to him in soft tones. "I was so scared when I saw you,
Severus. I didn't know if I could heal you. What if this fails? I can't bear
it." She laid her head on his chest.

Hearing the sound of a deep voice clearing behind her, she whirled, only to
see Ron standing there. Her shoulders sagged and she said, "I thought
you'd already left." She looked at him distractedly before turning back
and smoothing Severus' hair.

Ron braced himself for what he was going to say.

"Hermione, I debated whether or not to tell you this, but there's a
reason I was in Professor Snape's lab tonight. I think I owe you an
explanation."

When told her that he'd been secretly following her and Snape for weeks, he
could barely look her in the eye. The devastation on her countenance was one of
the most painful things he'd ever witnessed. She looked as if she felt totally
betrayed. Oh Lord! How was he ever going to fix this?

Hermione couldn't believe what she had just heard. "How could
you?" she whispered.

"I'm sorry, Hermione. I know we were wrong about him, in fact, I told
the Ministry that I thought he was really on our side, but they wanted me to
continue spying on him."

"So you just followed orders."

"Yes," he said in shame. "I was just trying to protect
you."

Hermione looked at him as if he were a stranger. Ron couldn't stand it.

"I know that you're having a secret relationship with Professor
Snape," he blurted out. "I couldn't understand your attraction to
him, and when I saw you two in Belize, I was ready to kill him." He looked
pleadingly at her. "It was obvious you felt something for him and I was
jealous. There was even a time I was hoping that he was a spy so that I
could get him out of your life. But then something happened," he said
softly. "I saw you two together and I saw how well-suited you are. I saw
the way you looked at each other when you thought the other wasn't looking.
I've always thought Snape was a mean-spirited, greasy git, but after following
him around in his private life, well . . . he's really not a bad fellow. He's
rather honorable and brave. And he cares for you very much, Hermione. Did you
know that he mutters your name in his sleep?"

Hermione blushed.

"There was a time when I thought you were the only woman for me. But
then I realized that we're really not all that compatible, o tha than as
friends."

"We'd probably kill each other," said Hermione, as tears began to
fall. They both laughed.

"Severus Snape is a lucky man, Hermione. I hope that when this is all
over, you can be together. I just want you to be happy. That's all I've ever
wanted."

"You're the best, Ron Weasley," she told him. She put her arms
around him and gave him a tight hug. "Thank you for being there for
Severus. I don't know what I would have done if I'd lost him."

Ron smiled at her. "I'm glad I could help. Now I'm going to meet with
the Headmaster, and then I'm spending the night in the castle. I'll see you in
the morning."

**************************************************

After Ron left, Hermione turned her attention back to Severus. He was
resting peacefully, the steady rise and fall of his chest a much-needed
reassurance. She looked at his face and noticed how vulnerable he looked in his
sleep. His face was thin and his nose and chin were angled in sharp planes. He
looked younger and for a moment Hermione could see the boy he had once been. In
an instant she remembered every minute she had spent with him since she came
back to Hogwarts. She couldn't imagine a future without him, and suddenly, the
thought hit her with astounding clarity:

I love him.

She shook her head in disbelief. "It's finally happened,"
she thought. "This is what it feels like."

Making a decision, she slowly stood up and took off her robe. Crawling into
bed with him, she pulled herself flush against his body. She murmured another
final spell and her body began to glow with a deep emerald green aura. She
marveled at how many of the healing spells she knew gave off a dark, emerald
green energy, while the Killing Curse released a harsh, painful metallic green.
"One color, two outcomes," she thought with irony.

The healing green energy enfolded them both, and laying her head on his
chest, she began to drift off to sleep. Before unconsciousness completely
overtook her, she whispered, "I love you, Severus."

At some point in the night, while still sleeping, Severus began to stir
restlessly. He instinctively entwined his arms around her and held her closely
to his body. Turning his head, he inhaled the sweet scent of her hair and
sighed, a small smile curving his lips.

He fell back into a deep and peaceful sleep.

To be continued . . .

***********************************************************

Author’s Note: "Serpens fortis" means "Strong snake" in
Latin.

Let's hope Severus is a "strong snake”! (wink wink)