Misery and Grief
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
17
Views:
12,097
Reviews:
23
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
17
Views:
12,097
Reviews:
23
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
1
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, it's characters, it's settings, or really anything at all. I also did not make money from this piece of fiction.
Too Close for Comfort
Harry just stood there quite limp while Draco gave him clothes, supposedly to try on. He found it strange that Draco didn't even once ask his size. Draco found his lame expression aggravating. "You're the one that brought me out here to this... place." His face contorted to allow Harry to know that he was about to say something about muggles. "Anyways, I'm practically doing this as a favor to you. Maybe people wouldn't hate you so much if you even looked the part of temporary savior of the... race." A few muggles looked their way strangely and Harry really doubted that the fact that people disliked him or disbelieved him or thought he was a nutter had anything to do with how he dressed. Draco piled something else into his arms quite casually, simply plucking it off the rack and tossing it into the pile.
"How about I go try things on?" He had a fair amount of regret for saying that, since he didn't really want to try things on, but none the less he wanted to detach himself from both the job of carrying stuff and the strange feeling of Draco's refound arrogant aura. He ducked towards the closets, where a lady opened the door and let him in. Draco followed, much to Harry's dismay.
"You're showing me every article of clothing. And please, please, please try to wear things that match together." Harry stared at the door a moment, frozen. Had Draco really just said please? Three times? He could hear the girl who had let him into the dressing room compliment Draco on his tastes as he got dressed in the first outfit.
A navy V neck sweater, black jeans, black shoes. Simple, perfect. Until he stepped out of the small room. "You're hopeless." He wasn't even out of the doorway entirely yet. The girl stared at Malfoy in shock of his cold bluntness. "No taste whatsoever." And without further adu, he pushed Potter back into the room and followed him into it, closing the door behind him. He heard the girl giggle slightly.
"Hey-"
"Navy with black? You're kidding me, right? And all just plain colored, no patterns? Pathetic." Why these words seem to cut Harry to the bone, he had no idea, but he was getting angry. "Shirt off." Harry complied, if only to hide his blush and will it away by the time the shirt went over his head, only to be replaced by another that Draco forced over him. "And put these on." They were a pair of green socks. Harry didn't hesitate but he looked at Draco with strange quirk in his eyebrow anyways. As soon as the shiny black shoes were back on, he felt a coat going over him and he put that on as well.
Draco pushed him out of the cubicle then, and Harry couldn't help as if he'd just come out of a whirlwind. And why was there suddenly four female employees looking at him expectantly, smiling. "Oh, adorable!" One of them piped up, to be hushed by two others. He span around to see himself. A green turtleneck did in fact bring out his eyes, hidden behind a silvery grey military type jacket that opened to show quite a bit of the green undershirt. He couldn't help but give a sidelong glance at the one who did this to him. Was it him, or was this highly Slytherin looking?
"Okay, next." Harry barely had time to notice Draco going back into the dressing room before he grimaced.
"You stay out here and flirt or something, just tell me what to put on and I'll put it on, alright?" For some reason, the idea of him getting practically naked with the hurricane that is Draco in the same room did not make him comfortable.
So it was that he tried on various clothes, often coming out to help Draco tie some stupid scarf. He was happy to find out that Draco's choices were not limited to Slytherin colors but in fact ranged into even pinks, which he adamantly refused to wear, quite sure that the boy was just trying to get him to wear something ridiculous. He had to admit he was both relieved for his pocketbook and upset that he had to try on so much when they ended up buying only a couple items at the cash register. That was until Draco let on that this was not going to be the only store they would be shopping at today.
At each store he tried on things against his will to make Draco happy, and he wondered about that. It was made even worse by the fact that at every store they seemed to think they were something other than former enemies forced by situation into each others presence and trying to work together to make life not so bad... They thought they were a lot more, to put it lightly. The Slytherin either didn't mind or didn't notice and Harry decided not to press the subject, quite fearful that Draco's attitude would change midstroke and he'd burrow into himself like he had. Maybe Hermione had been onto something, though he wished he hadn't become a test dummy.
Draco, on the other hand, was having the time of his life. Girls were not nearly as scary as men, he got to torment Harry Potter, he got to spend money; how could he be any happier? He wasn't really sure when he had become so close to his dark haired companion, able to reach out and grab him and spin him around and pull him this way or that so easily, and that nagged at the back of his head. But when him and Harry slamming hats onto each other, fedoras and cabbies and even ugly muggle baseball caps, he had laughed despite himself. And when Harry laughed with him, he felt something move within him.
And it was like that that the spent the day, moving from store to store and buying things more to Draco's discretion than anything else. Draco somehow felt special and cared for, without any weird and awkward occurances. When it came to come home, and Draco was carrying the fruits of his labors, the only thing weird about Harry holding his arm to apparate them back was that it didn't feel weird, never minding that he could have easily apparated his way back by himself. It was already dark outside when they loaded everything into Harry's place.
Draco was exhilirated, Harry was tired, but they were both content in their own way. They both collapsed on the love seat, Harry slumping sleepily and Draco flopping playfully. Harry had to look at Draco, seeing a flush under the boy's skin that wasn't so much pink as it just made him look less pale and more alive. A tint of a smile graced those thin, rose lips in a way he'd never seen before. The dark haired man found him staring at Draco through lazy emerald eyes, studying him. How different they were in everything, even more than just in appearance. He felt his eyelids get heavy as he saw the boy rummaging through the newly collected items.
But before Draco could decide an outfit made up of various store's merchandise for Harry to try on for him, Harry had fallen asleep, leaning over the opposite side of the small couch's arm.
Harry knew instantly that he was on the couch when he felt himself come out of his sleep. He had fallen asleep here many times on his own and knew the curve of the cushions and the feeling of the upholstery. Him and the ache that came with laying awkardly on a place that is both not straight and too small were familiar with one another. However, he knew immediately something else, and that was that someone was laying on him, and once he thought about it he didn't have to analyze his mind very far to figure out who. Personally, he didn't care and was ready to just go back to sleep, but a nagging curiosity to actually see it bugged him until he slowly lifted heavy eyes.
The hero was laying on his back now, one leg spraled over the edge and bent to the floor, the other tucked between draco and the back cushion, bent into a V. Draco laid between his legs, head resting on it's side on top of the darker boy's chest. Those pale arms, one hand tucked under his chin and the other sprawled to Harry's hip. Legs tucked in on the remaining area of the couch between Harry's legs, close a fetal position again. Harry, who his arms had just been laying aimlessly at either side, could not help but lift them, placing one in Draco's hair and the other reaching for his wand that was still in his pocket. He whispered "Accio blanket!" and it covered them up to Draco's shoulders. Putting the wand by his head, he placed that arm over Draco's shoulder and fell back to sleep, wondering why all he had just done seemed so natural.
Draco later woke up, quite suddenly. He opened his eyes without moving, still quite tired, and saw that it was already dusk. He had only meant to rest his eyes while leaning on Potter for a few moments, an hour maybe. Now somehow they had become entangled into each other, Draco's body now facing Harry's, knees bent so his feet almost hovered in the air because of the arm of the seat, arms tucked into an almost hug of the other boy. Worse was the fact that Harry was just as much tangled in him as the other way around, one knee laying over Draco's legs, both arms wrapped around Draco's head lazily. Although he was panicking a bit, he couldn't help but feel warm and comforted in this grasp. It was late that he noticed the blanket over them, under each of them in some places as evidence of movement, proof that Harry had woken up at some point.
His heart beat ferverently, hoping that the other boy had woken up whilst the sleeping together was a chaste lean onto the other boy. He felt his face get warm. Worse off was that he couldn't crawl out of the grasp without waking the one he was so entwined with. His body said that he didn't even want to leave Harry's careful hold anyways but his mind screamed at him. Again, the confusion from when he was raped, the inability for himself and his physical being to agree. Daring to lift his head slightly to look at the other boy, he was shocked to find green staring right back at him. His heart stopped dreadfully.
"Oh, so you've awaken." What was that? That careless tone while he was holding onto him the way he was, which he shouldn't be if he had woken up. His arms shouldn't be around him like this, Harry Potter shouldn't have his knee around Draco's legs. One hand was not supposed to be, under any circumstance other than unconsciousness, half way ran through his pearly hair. He opened his mouth, but was cut off by Harry continuation. "I bet no one at school would think that the prosperious and pompous Draco Malfoy would ever sleep with the legendary and often referred to as insane Harry Potter."
That was it, Draco scrambled, trying to get out of this couch with the blasted man. "We did not SLEEP together, not in the way your leading on to, anyways." No, they just had been entangled together, warm and cozy in each others arms.
"Malfoy, if you wanted to be between my legs so badly, you really should have said so." This jeering was unnatural coming from Harry, and it was in mid swipe that Draco realized what Harry was doing. Despite the deep blush on Draco's face, his arrogance and cunning demeanor welled up inside him joyously. Harry, by making things awkward, was making things less personal, and therefor less awkward in the way that really would matter later. Harry was letting Draco hate him, because he knew that was what Draco was most comfortable with. This knowledge did not stop Draco's hand, now powered by the cruelty he had let run him for years, from loudly clashing against the brunette's cheek.
Things were calm now, and Draco would be able to rationally undo himself from Harry, who had moved his hands and leg to allow for it. That was until he actually tried at it. For a moment, their bodies rubbed together and their faces were in very close proximity to each other. The other would never know that it was in that moment that each heart stopped, staring in calm green that seemed very secretive for a moment, and big shocked grey ones. Then Draco continued to move, up and away, and they both were able to breathe again.
The took showers simultaneously that morning, which was possible through magic. Draco's was extremely hot, hoping that the burning skin would take his mind off of what happened, to clean his enemy off of him, to wash away the lingering feeling of where Harry had been so warmly holding him. Harry was the opposite, his shower extremely cold, as his mind had inadvertently wandered where he was fairly sure it shouldn't go. However, in that moment of closeness, beyond the lazy togetherness they had shared before, he couldn't help but have been enticed by Draco's mussed hair, the curve of his body, those metallic eyes that had gone oh so wide. He shook his head, saying it had to do with the fact that he'd just been under socialized as a child and despite his small endeavors before, he was still not used to such things.
And that morning, Draco had reverted to his old antisocial self, quite sure that he would not talk to Harry more than absolutely necessary. He'd clean all day, ignoring the boy with black hair. No, he really did not want to look at the other man until he reclaimed his sneer, which had been broken since the night before he showed up. That was until Harry came into his room, food in hand. He sighed, he'd just take the food, say thank you, and then the man would leave, surely. Until he looked up.
Harry was actually wearing the clothes Draco had bought the day before. Draco, having just taken the food, almost dropped it. This was hardly fair, that Harry now looked like a handsome human being, his messy hair accenting it instead of taking away from it. It was his fault, he knew that, but at the same time...
It did not go unnoticed by Harry that grey sharp eyes were raking over him, which didn't really help his own thoughts. Against his will, he blushed sightly. "You don't have to look surprised, I paid for them, it only makes sense that I would wear them." He said nervously and Draco looked away, taking his food. Harry also looked away.
In that moment, the air was still and the tension was high. They both were aware something was changing, but for the life of them they didn't want to think of what. They were no longer comfortable, unable to truly revert to their usual jibes and defenses. Their instincts had gone from a fire-like hatred to a calm fluidity, everything was so simple that it was painful. Both of them had been so very lonely over the years, nothing had changed in that aspect, they had always both been pinnacle people surrounded by others who never really understood them.
Now, however, on the brink of someone who they actually might have a connection with, they wavered, sudden aware of their isolation more than ever.
--
A/N: Weird place to end, I know.
"How about I go try things on?" He had a fair amount of regret for saying that, since he didn't really want to try things on, but none the less he wanted to detach himself from both the job of carrying stuff and the strange feeling of Draco's refound arrogant aura. He ducked towards the closets, where a lady opened the door and let him in. Draco followed, much to Harry's dismay.
"You're showing me every article of clothing. And please, please, please try to wear things that match together." Harry stared at the door a moment, frozen. Had Draco really just said please? Three times? He could hear the girl who had let him into the dressing room compliment Draco on his tastes as he got dressed in the first outfit.
A navy V neck sweater, black jeans, black shoes. Simple, perfect. Until he stepped out of the small room. "You're hopeless." He wasn't even out of the doorway entirely yet. The girl stared at Malfoy in shock of his cold bluntness. "No taste whatsoever." And without further adu, he pushed Potter back into the room and followed him into it, closing the door behind him. He heard the girl giggle slightly.
"Hey-"
"Navy with black? You're kidding me, right? And all just plain colored, no patterns? Pathetic." Why these words seem to cut Harry to the bone, he had no idea, but he was getting angry. "Shirt off." Harry complied, if only to hide his blush and will it away by the time the shirt went over his head, only to be replaced by another that Draco forced over him. "And put these on." They were a pair of green socks. Harry didn't hesitate but he looked at Draco with strange quirk in his eyebrow anyways. As soon as the shiny black shoes were back on, he felt a coat going over him and he put that on as well.
Draco pushed him out of the cubicle then, and Harry couldn't help as if he'd just come out of a whirlwind. And why was there suddenly four female employees looking at him expectantly, smiling. "Oh, adorable!" One of them piped up, to be hushed by two others. He span around to see himself. A green turtleneck did in fact bring out his eyes, hidden behind a silvery grey military type jacket that opened to show quite a bit of the green undershirt. He couldn't help but give a sidelong glance at the one who did this to him. Was it him, or was this highly Slytherin looking?
"Okay, next." Harry barely had time to notice Draco going back into the dressing room before he grimaced.
"You stay out here and flirt or something, just tell me what to put on and I'll put it on, alright?" For some reason, the idea of him getting practically naked with the hurricane that is Draco in the same room did not make him comfortable.
So it was that he tried on various clothes, often coming out to help Draco tie some stupid scarf. He was happy to find out that Draco's choices were not limited to Slytherin colors but in fact ranged into even pinks, which he adamantly refused to wear, quite sure that the boy was just trying to get him to wear something ridiculous. He had to admit he was both relieved for his pocketbook and upset that he had to try on so much when they ended up buying only a couple items at the cash register. That was until Draco let on that this was not going to be the only store they would be shopping at today.
At each store he tried on things against his will to make Draco happy, and he wondered about that. It was made even worse by the fact that at every store they seemed to think they were something other than former enemies forced by situation into each others presence and trying to work together to make life not so bad... They thought they were a lot more, to put it lightly. The Slytherin either didn't mind or didn't notice and Harry decided not to press the subject, quite fearful that Draco's attitude would change midstroke and he'd burrow into himself like he had. Maybe Hermione had been onto something, though he wished he hadn't become a test dummy.
Draco, on the other hand, was having the time of his life. Girls were not nearly as scary as men, he got to torment Harry Potter, he got to spend money; how could he be any happier? He wasn't really sure when he had become so close to his dark haired companion, able to reach out and grab him and spin him around and pull him this way or that so easily, and that nagged at the back of his head. But when him and Harry slamming hats onto each other, fedoras and cabbies and even ugly muggle baseball caps, he had laughed despite himself. And when Harry laughed with him, he felt something move within him.
And it was like that that the spent the day, moving from store to store and buying things more to Draco's discretion than anything else. Draco somehow felt special and cared for, without any weird and awkward occurances. When it came to come home, and Draco was carrying the fruits of his labors, the only thing weird about Harry holding his arm to apparate them back was that it didn't feel weird, never minding that he could have easily apparated his way back by himself. It was already dark outside when they loaded everything into Harry's place.
Draco was exhilirated, Harry was tired, but they were both content in their own way. They both collapsed on the love seat, Harry slumping sleepily and Draco flopping playfully. Harry had to look at Draco, seeing a flush under the boy's skin that wasn't so much pink as it just made him look less pale and more alive. A tint of a smile graced those thin, rose lips in a way he'd never seen before. The dark haired man found him staring at Draco through lazy emerald eyes, studying him. How different they were in everything, even more than just in appearance. He felt his eyelids get heavy as he saw the boy rummaging through the newly collected items.
But before Draco could decide an outfit made up of various store's merchandise for Harry to try on for him, Harry had fallen asleep, leaning over the opposite side of the small couch's arm.
Harry knew instantly that he was on the couch when he felt himself come out of his sleep. He had fallen asleep here many times on his own and knew the curve of the cushions and the feeling of the upholstery. Him and the ache that came with laying awkardly on a place that is both not straight and too small were familiar with one another. However, he knew immediately something else, and that was that someone was laying on him, and once he thought about it he didn't have to analyze his mind very far to figure out who. Personally, he didn't care and was ready to just go back to sleep, but a nagging curiosity to actually see it bugged him until he slowly lifted heavy eyes.
The hero was laying on his back now, one leg spraled over the edge and bent to the floor, the other tucked between draco and the back cushion, bent into a V. Draco laid between his legs, head resting on it's side on top of the darker boy's chest. Those pale arms, one hand tucked under his chin and the other sprawled to Harry's hip. Legs tucked in on the remaining area of the couch between Harry's legs, close a fetal position again. Harry, who his arms had just been laying aimlessly at either side, could not help but lift them, placing one in Draco's hair and the other reaching for his wand that was still in his pocket. He whispered "Accio blanket!" and it covered them up to Draco's shoulders. Putting the wand by his head, he placed that arm over Draco's shoulder and fell back to sleep, wondering why all he had just done seemed so natural.
Draco later woke up, quite suddenly. He opened his eyes without moving, still quite tired, and saw that it was already dusk. He had only meant to rest his eyes while leaning on Potter for a few moments, an hour maybe. Now somehow they had become entangled into each other, Draco's body now facing Harry's, knees bent so his feet almost hovered in the air because of the arm of the seat, arms tucked into an almost hug of the other boy. Worse was the fact that Harry was just as much tangled in him as the other way around, one knee laying over Draco's legs, both arms wrapped around Draco's head lazily. Although he was panicking a bit, he couldn't help but feel warm and comforted in this grasp. It was late that he noticed the blanket over them, under each of them in some places as evidence of movement, proof that Harry had woken up at some point.
His heart beat ferverently, hoping that the other boy had woken up whilst the sleeping together was a chaste lean onto the other boy. He felt his face get warm. Worse off was that he couldn't crawl out of the grasp without waking the one he was so entwined with. His body said that he didn't even want to leave Harry's careful hold anyways but his mind screamed at him. Again, the confusion from when he was raped, the inability for himself and his physical being to agree. Daring to lift his head slightly to look at the other boy, he was shocked to find green staring right back at him. His heart stopped dreadfully.
"Oh, so you've awaken." What was that? That careless tone while he was holding onto him the way he was, which he shouldn't be if he had woken up. His arms shouldn't be around him like this, Harry Potter shouldn't have his knee around Draco's legs. One hand was not supposed to be, under any circumstance other than unconsciousness, half way ran through his pearly hair. He opened his mouth, but was cut off by Harry continuation. "I bet no one at school would think that the prosperious and pompous Draco Malfoy would ever sleep with the legendary and often referred to as insane Harry Potter."
That was it, Draco scrambled, trying to get out of this couch with the blasted man. "We did not SLEEP together, not in the way your leading on to, anyways." No, they just had been entangled together, warm and cozy in each others arms.
"Malfoy, if you wanted to be between my legs so badly, you really should have said so." This jeering was unnatural coming from Harry, and it was in mid swipe that Draco realized what Harry was doing. Despite the deep blush on Draco's face, his arrogance and cunning demeanor welled up inside him joyously. Harry, by making things awkward, was making things less personal, and therefor less awkward in the way that really would matter later. Harry was letting Draco hate him, because he knew that was what Draco was most comfortable with. This knowledge did not stop Draco's hand, now powered by the cruelty he had let run him for years, from loudly clashing against the brunette's cheek.
Things were calm now, and Draco would be able to rationally undo himself from Harry, who had moved his hands and leg to allow for it. That was until he actually tried at it. For a moment, their bodies rubbed together and their faces were in very close proximity to each other. The other would never know that it was in that moment that each heart stopped, staring in calm green that seemed very secretive for a moment, and big shocked grey ones. Then Draco continued to move, up and away, and they both were able to breathe again.
The took showers simultaneously that morning, which was possible through magic. Draco's was extremely hot, hoping that the burning skin would take his mind off of what happened, to clean his enemy off of him, to wash away the lingering feeling of where Harry had been so warmly holding him. Harry was the opposite, his shower extremely cold, as his mind had inadvertently wandered where he was fairly sure it shouldn't go. However, in that moment of closeness, beyond the lazy togetherness they had shared before, he couldn't help but have been enticed by Draco's mussed hair, the curve of his body, those metallic eyes that had gone oh so wide. He shook his head, saying it had to do with the fact that he'd just been under socialized as a child and despite his small endeavors before, he was still not used to such things.
And that morning, Draco had reverted to his old antisocial self, quite sure that he would not talk to Harry more than absolutely necessary. He'd clean all day, ignoring the boy with black hair. No, he really did not want to look at the other man until he reclaimed his sneer, which had been broken since the night before he showed up. That was until Harry came into his room, food in hand. He sighed, he'd just take the food, say thank you, and then the man would leave, surely. Until he looked up.
Harry was actually wearing the clothes Draco had bought the day before. Draco, having just taken the food, almost dropped it. This was hardly fair, that Harry now looked like a handsome human being, his messy hair accenting it instead of taking away from it. It was his fault, he knew that, but at the same time...
It did not go unnoticed by Harry that grey sharp eyes were raking over him, which didn't really help his own thoughts. Against his will, he blushed sightly. "You don't have to look surprised, I paid for them, it only makes sense that I would wear them." He said nervously and Draco looked away, taking his food. Harry also looked away.
In that moment, the air was still and the tension was high. They both were aware something was changing, but for the life of them they didn't want to think of what. They were no longer comfortable, unable to truly revert to their usual jibes and defenses. Their instincts had gone from a fire-like hatred to a calm fluidity, everything was so simple that it was painful. Both of them had been so very lonely over the years, nothing had changed in that aspect, they had always both been pinnacle people surrounded by others who never really understood them.
Now, however, on the brink of someone who they actually might have a connection with, they wavered, sudden aware of their isolation more than ever.
--
A/N: Weird place to end, I know.