Eye of the Beholder

Chapter 10

Chapter 10. Crunch Time

Saturday morning Sasha woke up late from a long, dreamless sleep. She stretched, then lay back down to appreciate the warm blankets and lazy morning.

She had been so busy that the last week had been almost a blur to her. She had been cramming for her Christmas exams, and of course there was the extra potions sessions with Snape. While things were coming along well, it was hard work. Snape was not kidding when he warned she she thought. It was not just the fact that she had to prepare all the ingredients, monitor the three potions for colour, consistency and smell, and take notes on everything she did, but that Snape quizzed her on the reactions taking place. Why don’t you add the dried vole tails before the mink musk? Why must the temperature be high enough to smoke, but not to boil? She had to admit she had learned more in the past week than she had all year in his regular potions class.

 
Despite the odd tense moment between the two of them, she was finding herself becoming more accustom and comfortable around Snape, she thought. Originally, she was a bit frightened by his presence, she admitted. Mainly because of his cold indifference to her, or else the opposite - the blatant sarcasm he used when answering her questions. His mood swings kept her alert to everything he said or did. There was one day that Snape creeped her out a bit. She was hunched over her table, studying her notes, when she realize he had silently walked up behind her and had been watching her for the past few minutes. Just staring at her, not her notes.

 
However, there were other times when he caused her insides to quiver for no particular reason. Like when he would take her hand in his to stir one of the potions, getting her to feel its consistency, so she would know when to add more broth, or to lower the heat a bit. It was those moments when she would feel her heart beating faster, but she could not understand why. It was just the innocent touches he gave her, a casual hand on her shoulder when she was sitting and he was looking over her shoulder, or the warm, sensual look in his black eyes when she inadvertently said something funny, and made him laugh. Or how his hair always appeared greasy to her before, but she knew he kept it clean, as she could smell the subtle lemony scent of it when he bent next to her. These things made her notice him not as Snape, the Potions Master, but as Severus, the man.

 
You are an idiot Sasha, she scolded herself. Don’t even for a minute get your hopes up that he sees you as anything other than a student. Probably the only reason he is helping you is that he feels sorry for you. She sighed at the thought, but knew she was right. If she ever did attempt to do or say anything to him to indicate she was attracted to him, he would probably immediately stop their session, and kick her out of his potions class to boot. Forget it, move on and don’t dwell on him, she chided herself.

 
Besides, she thought, you have exams to study for. With a sigh of resignation at another weekend full of studying, she got out of bead and headed for the showers.

 
**

It was Wednesday morning, and she was having breakfast with the other Ravenclaw sixth years when Cho surprised the hell out of her.

 
"So Sasha, are you going to the Christmas dance on Friday?" she asked casually. Too casually, Sasha thought. The other sixth year girls stopped their conversation, and looked at her expectantly.

 
It took Sasha a moment to get over her surprise at the question. "Um, well, I hadn’t planned on it. Why, Cho?"

 
Cho looked at the other girls and they exchanged a meaningful look. "Well, we were thinking, if you wanted to, you could come with us. Adrian is excellent with make-up and could help you with your hair," she volunteered. Adrwas was sitting across from Cho, and she looked at Sasha with a hesitant smile.

 
Sasha was confused. "Um, this may sound rather odd, but why are you offering to do this?"

 
Cho looked at the others again, then cleared her throat. "Well, I guess, it has to do with the other night. When you had your dream. Well, after that night we," Cho indicated their other sixth year roommates, "were talking, and realized maybe you need to get out a bit more. We know you are more of the loner type, and never wanted to ask you about, about…" Sasha could translate Cho’s unspoken question in her mind… we never wanted to ask you about your scar….. "Things," Cho said weakly, but Sasha knew what she was getting at. "Anyway, we realize you probably have good reasons why you keep to yourself." Cho shrugged, and let the thought die. "We just thought you might want bit of female companionship, and thought we would ask if you wanted to join us. If you’re not interested, it really doesn’t matter," she said turning away, nonplused.

 
Sasha quickly thought about it. She never had any intention of going, but she recognized that Cho was extending a hand in friendship. It was a first, and Sasha did not want to start any hard feelings with her sixth year roommates. She turned to address Cho and the others. "I have something to do right after dinner on Friday, but if you have the time, and I am not too late getting in, I would appreciate your help with my hair at least," she said softly.

 
Adrian smiled and said, "We plan on leaving the common room about nine, so if you are there by then, we will be happy to give you a hand." Sasha smiled back.

 
Great, she thought. Now what have you agreed to, Sasha you twit? Another evening of lonely boredom, being just another wall-flower, and nobody asking you to dance. You have been there, tried that and always regretted going to these events. Not that you can dance anyway, she thought to herself.

 
The clanging bell sounded, indicating breakfast was over. Sasha stood and picked up her books. She had her charms final in ten minutes and did not want to be late.

 
**

That evening, Sasha breezed into Snape’s potions lab with a big grin on her face. Snape sat hunched over a stack of scrolls, scowling, obviously not in a good mood. He peered up at her to acknowledge her presence, looked back at the pile of exams in front of him, and his scowl deepened.

 
"Well, at least somebody is in a good mood," he sneered. Even knowing Snape was going to be in a snit did nothing to dampen her spirits. She walked over to him, took a seat on the stool there, and grinned up at him. She totally ignored his scathing looks and continued to taunt him, grinning away like an idiot. He sighed in resignation, knowing he would never finish his marking unless he spoke with her. He put his pen down, and regarded her with a baleful eye.

 
"So. I can only assume by the smug look on your face that you have completed your exams?"

 
Her grin widened into a full smile, and she stretched her arms up over her head in happy abandon. "Don’t you remember how good it feels to get them over and done with?" she asked. "I think I will sleep like a dead person tonight," she said yawning.

 
"Well whatever you do, don’t drool on my exam papers, it makes the ink run," Snape said testily, moving a pile away from in front Sasha, as if she were about to plunk her head down and fall asleep then and there.

 
Sasha regarded him with an amused look on her face. "And how do you know that," she shot back. "I just can’t picture you draped over a stack of potions exams, fast asleep and drooling away, Professor Snape," she said chuckling. The chuckle turned into peals of laughter. The mental image was killing her.

 
Snape gave her one of his best sneers, and went back to marking but the corners of his mouth revealed that he too found the thought amusing.

 
Sasha realized that this is one of those moments with Snape that she really liked. I can talk to him and it almost feels, well, normal, she thought warmly. They way they just talked about small things and could laugh together. Then a sobering thought hit her. In just over two weeks the potion will be completed, and this companionship will come to an end. There will be no reason for her to come and spend time with Snape. The thought left her with a surprisingly empty feeling in her gut.

 
He had been watching her. She had a playful tilt to her head, and a wide smile that suddenly faded, replaced by a sudden look of sadness.

 
"What were you just thinking about?" he inquired, curious.

 
Sasha stood up. "Nothing. Really. We should get going on the potions, Professor Snape," was all she said. She did not want to dwell on the direction her thoughts were going in.

 
"I wanted to ask you about this Friday though," she said, going over to the fireplace and checking on her three cauldrons hanging there.

 
"Ah yes," Snape replied mockingly, "the school Christmas dance. I assume you would like to attend, and would want to complete the final potions session early, perhaps?" He stood and walked over to where she was standing near the fireplace.

 
She straightened to face him. "No actually," she said with surprise. "I don’t think I am going." She still had not completely decided if she was going to go or not. "I was just wondering how much we had left to do, and what the next steps were," she replied innocently, looking up at him.

 
In some ways it did not surprise him to hear that she would not be there. He knew from past experience how lonely and painful it was, standing there by yourself against the wall all night, hoping the damn event would just be over with. He never had the courage to ask anyone to dance, and nobody ever asked him, which just left him angry and frustrated. Eventually he just avoided the events altogether.

 
"Well, with regards to the potions, it seems like we are on schedule. Basically tonight we just monitor the cauldrons, and at the end of the evening remove them from the heat, cover and let cool for a day or two. By Friday they will be ready to strain and bottle."

 
Sasha nodded her head in acknowledgement and gave each of the potions a stir. She did not much feel like talking, and Snape had walked back to his table where he resumed marking. Each were lost to their own thoughts, and it was a relaxed, companionable silence that filled the room, broken only by the sound of Snape’s quill scratching on the parchment.

 
It was almost time to leave when Snape heard someone clear their throat near the lab door. He looked up sharply to see Dumbledore standing there, a benevolent look on his face. "I hope I am not disturbing anything," he said smiling.

 
"Headmaster, of course not. Do come in," Snape said coldly. Inside he seethed. What the hell was Dumbeldoer doing here, and what did he want. Snape realized he was more angry at himself than Dumbeldoer. Mostly, because he should have been aware of the other’s presence, as Albus could have been standing there for minutes for all he knew.

 
Dumbledore walked over to the fireplace and peered into the cauldrons hanging there. He looked up at Sasha with a welcoming smile. "So thing are progressing well? " he inquired.

 
Sasha smiled back at the kindly man. "As far as we know. However, we really will not find out for another two weeks or so, after everything has been combined."

 
"I see," Dumbledore replied. He looked more intensely at Sasha, and she was surprised at the depth of wisdom in his clear blue eyes. "Any you Sasha, you have survived being tutored by our illustrious Potions Master?" he asked cryptically.

 
Sasha was confused. She looked at Dumbeldoer, then at Snape, and then back at Dumbledore. A very faint blush crept up her neck and threatened to go higher. "Yes, I have. He has been very exacting, but I think my potions skills have improved because of it," she replied cautiously.

 
Dumbledore just nodded. Snape cleared his throat and addressed her with indifference. "Sasha, I do believe the Headmaster and I have issues to discuss. That will be all for tonight." She got the hint and picking up her bag, she left the room.

 
Dumbledore walked over to Snape and took a seat on the stool beside him. "She looks like she has survived your attentions without too much ill will, Severus. She obviously holds you in high regard, which is always a good thing. Still, I would like to know your opinion of the potion, and how they are progressing."

 
"Fine," Snape spit out, still angry with himself. "Although we are not through yet." He hated questions about works in progress. There was no way to know if the potion was already ruined or not, and they would simply have to wait to see.

 
"Good. I would hate for her to get too hopeful on something that may not actually work," Dumbledore said carefully. "No disrespect intended to you very excellent skill, Severus."

 
Snape narrowed his eyes just slightly, and his tone mocked the older wizards. "None taken."

 
Dumbledore stood up, and walked towards the door. "Oh yes, one more thing. You will be attending the dance this Friday, will you not, Severus?" He asked pointedly. "I don’t have to remind you it is your duty as an instructor, not to mention being the Head of Slytherin House, to attend all Hogwarts functions. Including the ones you dislike."

 
Snape seethed at the subtle reminder. "No, of course not, Headmaster. I will make an appearance at tventvent, although I can’t say I will stay for long."

 
"Good," Dumbledore said cheerily as he was exiting through the lab door. Snape watched him go. He had a bad feeling about this. If he did not know better, he would think Albus was up to something.