Fall into Madness

Ron closed up his sketchbook and looked at the scenery that was before him. He always enjoyed the country. Having grown up in a place like the Burrow, a man tended to develop an appreciation for wide open spaces and lots of nature. The landscape drawing he was working on was for a gentleman that wanted to full a space above his mantle and loved nature as much as Ron did. He received commissions like this frequently and made a good living.

He began working as a painter and landscaper when he finished Hogwarts. Originally it was a way to get out of his parents home, but one day he just couldn’t resist and during a break from painting a building, took out his book and began drawing the hillside that the building rested on. The owner had came up behind him and noticed it, offering him a chance to do a mural in her backyard. It was the first artistic job that led to Ron’s shift of career paths.

He painted rustic settings for greeting cards and book jackets, and had illustrated several calendars under his own name. He began adding animal life when he could. He would love to try a singular focused portrait, but had yet to find the ideal model. For now landscapes and nature would have to suffice.

He packed up his bag and headed to the house he shared with Harry and Hermione. They had been through too much to go their separate ways after school ended. It was truer for Harry and Hermione though, who began dating a year after they graduated. The home was nice and cozy and when it was time for Ron to leave they would have a nice guest bedroom for friends. They never talked of his leaving and there really was no reason for him to live alone. With a third person in the household it lessened the bills for everyone, not that it was an issue. Harry and Hermione made a good living, and Ron was increasing his income every year, but having less expenses was appreciated by all three and it allowed them all to add more to savings. Although both Ron and Harry thought Hermione was just trying to keep the trio together as long as possible.

He entered through the main door and with a wave of his wand, sent his bag floating off to his room. “Hey, there, just in time.” Harry grinned at him and tossed his head over his shoulder. “Can you grab the plates?” He asked, balancing a hot pot in his hands.

“Sure.” He grabbed plates and settings for three, shifting sideways to give Hermione room to maneuver with the jug and glasses. In no time at all, all three were seated and having dinner. It was something Hermione had come to treasure and both boys obliged her. It reminded her of their feasts at Hogwarts where they took the time to talk and socialize.

“Oh Ron, by the way,” Hermione said, after a moment, “Dorian popped into the bookshop again.” Hermione had opened her own bookshop in Diagon Alley, offering new and used, as well as the chance to trade old books. She had done very well and had received a distributorship to carry Hogwarts school books like Flourish and Blotts.

“I’m sorry about him Hermione.” Ron was at a loss for what to do. He had met Dorian at a club in London and about a month later they began dating, but it wasn’t work out. Dorian was very demanding of Ron’s time and as an artist he could be lost in his sketchbook for days and even weeks while working on a piece. This didn’t sit well with Dorian who liked to schedule time, who wanted to know where he was going, when he would be back, and why did he have to take hours doing nothing.

Ron found Dorian to be a funny, loyal and generous man, and a fabulous lover. There sex life was incredible, but it wasn’t enough to make a relationship last. He needed a man who understood the demands of his career. Ron wanted to move more mainstream with his art. He wanted to paint more fantasy style images along with nature, as well as human figures, and had several ideas in his head, he just needed to take the first step. Dorian however was making things difficult for him. He didn’t seem to understand that it was over, and it was becoming stressful for Ron.

“I can talk to him if you like Ron.” Harry offered, seeing his friend conflicted. As an auror, Harry would make quite an impression.

“No Harry, he will think I called the aurors on him, or that you are abusing your authority.” Harry hated to admit that he was right, but he also knew Ron was dreading seeing the man again. He didn’t want his friend to have to deal with this if he didn’t have to. However, he couldn’t do anything unless Ron lodged a formal complaint. Dorian would assume that he was abusing his position as an Auror and he could start a lot of problems. Problems that wouldn’t be easy to fix.

“Well, if he won’t leave you alone then I wouldn’t be out of order in speaking to him.” Ron grinned. Leave it to Harry to find the loophole.

“Harry, I will deal with Dorian.” He continued eating and brought up the glen he had painted earlier. Harry and Hermione were the only ones who knew about his desires to broaden his art. They thought he should move on to more challenging images, not just nature even though it was his forte, and his first love. Adding models could get expensive but the pay off would be rewarding. Hermione even suggested he use friends first, since they probably wouldn’t charge him for posing. She even joked that some of the more self centered ladies she knew would jump at the chance to pose for paintings.

Later that night, Ron sat in his bed staring at the drawing he had done that afternoon. The landscape would go as it was to the customer, but that boulder seemed to tease him. There should be something sitting on that boulder, it was a center piece, drawing attention but then not rewarding the eye with anything. Ron tried to imagine a person there, but nobody came to mind. Nothing seemed right. He would just have to hash it out tomorrow.



Ron walked with a deliberate slowness to the restaurant that Dorian worked at. ‘Worked at’ was a simpler phrase then should be used. Dorian’s family owned it and it would be his one day. He knew all aspects of the place, right down to the cleaning of the toilets. It was this willingness to see to all aspects his family’s business that made him appreciate Dorian when they dated. What he didn’t fathom was why Dorian didn’t understand that same drive when it came to Ron and his career. Eventually it took a toll and Ron had to call it off.

“Ron,” he turned and smiled at a short woman wearing a big grin. “it’s been awhile.”

“Yes it has. How are you Mrs. Di Vincenzo?” He leaned down and accepted her hug. Dorian’s parents had accepted their son being gay without a second thought. It was simply a part of who their son was and just like any parents, wanted him with a partner who cared for him. Ron’s own parents needed time to adjust to his news, his mother did anyway. But then again, Ron waited until his last year of school to come out. Dorian told his parents the moment he knew, which was his early teens.

“I’m good. We have missed you lately, what’s keeping you away?” She asked.

Ron gave her a confused look. “Surely Dorian told you……” he felt dread creeping up in him. He hadn’t told his parents about their breakup nearly three months ago.

“He mentioned you two were working out some issues,” she told him, then watched his face fall, “I see. It’s more than that?” Ron nodded. “I suppose he was hoping for the best. And I imagine by that expression that you are not here to make up.”

“No I’m not. I need to talk to him, is he around?” Ron regretted not being around the woman more, but he knew that in order for Dorian to get the picture, he had to break away completely.

“He’s in the office.” She said, giving his hand a squeeze.

“I’m sorry about this, but it’s for the best.” Ron told her.

“I understand. You were good for him, I’m sorry it didn’t work out.” She gave him a smile as he turned and made his way to the office in the back.

Dorian was sending an owl out the window when Ron entered. His face lit up when he turned around. “Ron!” He hurried over and took the redhead in a hug, but Ron didn’t lift his arms. It was tempting. Dorian was gorgeous, well built and not shy about being affectionate. He was ideal in so many ways and Ron would be lying if he said he wasn’t turned on by the sight of him, but he was here for other reasons and they had to be dealt with.

“Dorian, did you go to Hermione’s?” He asked, looking at the other man as he released the hug but kept his hands on Ron’s arms.

“Yes, I was looking for you. You never answered my owl.” He gestured to a nearby chair, but Ron refused to be distracted, ands remained where he was.

“Dorian, leave her alone. Don’t go to her shop anymore, unless you need a book and don’t ask about me.” Ron was never one to demand anything, but he had to do this.

“Ron what’s the matter?’ Dorian still hadn’t released his arms, and Ron had to brush them off, avoiding the hurt look he saw.

“We are not an item anymore,” Ron said firmly, “stop sending owls, stop bothering my friends.”

“Ron we had a row. Do you expect me to just give up?” he asked.

“We didn’t have a row, but yes, Dorian.” Ron let out a sigh. “You wanted me to be where you wanted me, you hated it when I worked, yet you always made me understand how much this place needed your attention. Was it too much to ask the same with my art?”

“Ron, people will buy your art no matter what you paint. There is no point in spending all that time away.” Dorian countered but Ron had heard it far too much to be moved by the same thing over and over again.

“Why is it that you cannot understand when I need something? You demand so much from me, but you were never willing to give me what I needed, you still aren’t. I supposed we were to break up when you wanted and only then?”

“Ron, I love you. Does it come as a shock that I want to fight for what we have?” He asked, the pleading look in his eye was evident, but Ron had grown unaffected by it.

“What we HAD, Dorian. I can’t deal with what you were asking for. So stop, I mean it.” He turned and left the office, refusing to respond when Dorian called his name. He knew the dark haired man with the hazel eyes wouldn’t follow, he had too much work to do.

Come to think of it, so did Ron.



He approached the same glen that he had been drawing before and made the decision to add a human figure to his own drawing. This would allow him to branch off. Nature was fine but he wanted to do more. A lady. A lovely lady sitting on the bolder, maybe someone who had long hair. Or even a child, lost in make believe. A young man, a broom resting at his side, taking a break from a hard flight. They all seemed wonderful ideas and he could see the images in his head.

He dropped his bag on the ground and faced the boulder, hands on his hips, staring at it. He put several people there, but none seemed right. Perhaps a centaur, maybe even a ghost….

“Did the big bad rock do something to you?” He spun around and saw Professor Snape. His former teacher, who he had never seen in anything but teaching robes, was clad in jeans and worn black t shirt. His feet were bare and his jeans rolled up past his ankles. Boots and what looked like a jar filled with dirty water were held in his hands.

“No, why?” He asked.

“You’re staring at that boulder like it crushed your puppy.” He said sarcastically. Ron chuckled. “A new piece of inspiration?” He took a step forward and dropped his boots on the ground, setting the jar down more carefully.

“In a way. I was drawing this scenery the other day, but decided to do a separate piece focusing on this spot. Now I am trying to figure out what to put there.” He said, digging into his bag or a moment. He flipped to the sketch of the boulder as a fixture piece, letting Snape have a look.

“It’s empty somehow.” He said after a moment, his eyes shifting from the drawing to the glen.

“I know. I have been trying to figure out what figure to use.” He looked back at the massive rock.

“A human then. No animals?” He asked.

Ron looked back at the man and grinned. Since he had grown tall as he matured he and Snape were the same height and eye to eye at this point. “How did you now I paint animals?”

“Your art is featured on several book covers. I’m a reader, and have come across several. I’ve also seen the calendars in shops of course.” He explained.

“Of course.” He looked back at the rock. “It will come to me eventually. For now the buyer will be happy with this one.” He flipped the page to the second drawing. This one was a landscape sketch with no specific focal point, long and obviously meant for a frame. “On canvas the effect will be brilliant and the color more vivid.”

“I can imagine it would be.” Severus agreed. “You do have copies of all your art don’t you?”

Ron chuckled. “Yes, I have copies of everything I have submitted to anyone.”

“What if someone wants an exclusive artwork?” He asked.

“Then they will have to go to another artist. I don’t work like that. It may be sold, but it is my art.” He said, shutting his book and shoving it back in his bag. “What’s in the jar?’ He asked trying to fill the empty void of silence.

“Pond moss. When it’s collected with it’s natural waters, it’s shelf life lengthens.” He explained, staring at the younger man.

“Something tells me that if I had paid closer attention in potions I would know that.” He couldn’t help smiling. Snape said nothing, merely lifted an eyebrow in answer. Ron just nodded, making a mental note to ask Hermione, but knowing he would forget. “Is it for a special brew?”

“Yes, pond moss is used for elixirs that heal headaches.” He replied.

“Do you have a problem with headaches?” Ron asked, genuinely concerned. Dorian had gotten them rarely, but painfully.

“Sometimes. Worried Wealsey?” Snape couldn’t help chuckling a little.

Ron relaxed into a smile of his own. “My former partner used to get them on occasion, and I remember how badly it affected him.” The explanation came out as an automatic response.

“Him?” Snape hadn’t changed his expression, or his stance. If he was shocked it didn’t show. If he was not surprised by what he heard it didn’t show. If he was amused it didn’t show.

“I’m gay.” Ron said meeting his eyes without fear. He had learned that to say it with embarrassment or shame invited arguments and having to defend himself.

“Has it gotten easier to say?” Snape asked, still not shifting his stance.

“It has, although sometimes I forget how many people don’t know.” He let out a light laugh. “I meet people who begin a conversation with ‘I heard that you were gay now’ so many times, that I just take it to be common knowledge.”

“It doesn’t surprise me.” Ron looked back at him and smiled.

“Why is that?” He wondered., seeing as how so many people were shocked by his life now.

Snape looked aside to gather his thoughts then gave the ginger his full attention. “You were always awkward with girls as a student, and better friends with them then most other young boys. Unlike other young men you never really leaned how to deal with ladies as you got older. You remained aloof and somehow unsure of them. They were friends, nothing more.”

“A lot of boys are awkward with women.” He countered with a phrase he had heard so many times. “Look at Neville.”

“Yes, but those that are awkward with young girls do not have several girls as close friends either. Granger, Miss Lovegood, your sister even. If you were awkward with girls, then you would have had them to help you with it Mr. Longbottom took advantage of having ladies as friends and it’s because of them that he was able to overcome his nervousness and understand how the female of the species thinks. But you on the other hand never really asked them for that assistance. Now, it makes sense why.” Snape slipped his hands in his pockets and just waited for another response.

“Fair enough then,” he said with a shrug, “that’s observant of you. I didn’t realize you had paid attention that closely.”

“I pay attention to all my students.” He said firmly.

“My apologies.” Ron said with a grin.

“Think nothing of it.” Snape held his eyes for a moment then leaned down picking up his boots and jar. “You know, Miss Lovegood would look good on that boulder, perhaps in a summery dress.”

Ron’s head shot around and he imagined Luna sitting there, her hair unbound and her typical serene look. “That’s brilliant!” The image took on details and soon Ron knew just what he wanted. “Thank you Professor.” He looked back but Snape was already walking away.

“You’re welcome…” he called over his shoulder “….Ron.”

“I can owl Luna,” Ron began talking to himself in a low voice he commonly used when thinking of his art, “she’ll pose for me….perhaps I can go to the second hand store and get a dress….she may have one of her……..” his head shot around and looked for the Professor but he was long gone. “Did he just call me Ron?”