I Will Always Find You

I Will Always Find You

Warning: This fiction is NC-17 for later chapters. Those chapters will be clearly marked.


This is a HG/SS fic. It deals with rape; but the rape is not described in great detail. At least not in a third person format. I may have her describe the rape from her point of view; but it will be done as tastefully as possible. Also Hermione will be eighteen and therefore of legal age in this fic.
This fic is also not Beta read; but I\'m pretty good at spotting mistakes before I post.


Disclaimer: I do not own any charachters or settings from Harry Potter. They belong to J.K. Rowling.

Chapter 1. Bad Beginnings


Hermione lay cold in the snow. She was unable to move,and in such horrible pain. The merry lights of the castle twinkled in her peripheral vision, mocking her. She could see the castle from her position my the lake; but being under Petrificus Totalus made it impossible for her to move or even cry out.


She couldn\'t even estimate how long she had lain there. Her fear had abated little by little after the death eater had gone; but she was still afraid that she was going to freeze to death all by herself, with help naught but a hundred yards away.


She was helpless. Her! The head girl, and smartest witch of her age had been struck down by a stunning spell, a punch and Petrificus Totalus.


Her eyes were the only parts of her body she could move. Tears slid down the sides of her face, hot and unchecked. She had heard horror stories of rape before; but had never anticipated how much damage the act actually caused. She was on fire inside. She could feel the blood slowly trickling out of her body. Making her thighs itch madly and making her feel so incredibly dirty.


Her nose was running just as badly as her eyes and it was freezing on her face. She knew she should stop crying; but gods help her, she couldn\'t.


She could still feel his hands on her, his putird breath in her face, see his grey-green eyes through the mask. She could hear his ragged breaths as he reached his climax. She could smell him, and she wanted to vomit.


Crunching sounds attracted her attention, and she started to panic, thinking the foul creature was back to finish the job. She struggled against the curse, trying to move, to get away; but she could not. Her chest heaved with sobs unable to break free of her body.

Severus Snape was heading across the grounds to the castle. He\'d just returned from London, and a trip to the apothecary. He was running out of ingredients he needed for the wolfsbane potion, and he couldn\'t get a lot of them around the castle or even in Hogsmeade.


He actually rather enjoyed his little trips to London, away from the castle and the dungeons. The bustle was annoying; but it was a change from all the insufferable students he had to put up with on a daily basis.


Term had only just stared and he was already longing for the summer holiday. Two months in,and he\'d already found a replacement for Longbottom. He had been relieved to be rid of the boy, who was not in his NEWT level class; but now a first year Hufflepuff had joined the ranks off classroom and cauldron wreckers.


He cringed inwardly at the memory of that mornings first year Hufflepuff/Ravenclaw class. Mr. Addison had added a whole jar of gods knew what to his potion. Snape had seen the impending explosion and commanded they all leave at once.


Most of them had been quick enough; but a few had to go to the hospital wing with burns and feathers sprouting from any skin that had been exposed. He still didn\'t understand what the little nit had done. He grinned evilly at the memory of the boy cleaning the dungeon by hand all day, trembling under his gaze.

Snape looked toward the lake and got a glimpse of something dark lying in the snow. It was unfamiliar, and it looked like...but it couldn\'t be.... He stepped closer. It was. A student was lying on the ground.


Snape dropped his basket of potions ingredients and rushed to the prone form. It was Miss Garnger, the head girl and little know it all. He was shocked to see her shirt had been torn open, revealing her little scrap of a brassier and her skirt was around her waist. Her underwear were lying torn to shreds nearby. He could see she was under petrificus totalus.


The livid briuse on her cheek and the ones dotting the rest of her body enraged and horrified him. Whoever had done this would pay. Know it all or not, she was still one of his students.


But the thing that scared him the most was the blood pooling between her thighs. He looked at her face and her eyes were rolling in her head. Tears were streaming freely down her face, and her nose was running, making it hard for her to breathe.


\"Miss Granger. Miss Granger, please calm down.\" He got out his wand and her eyes stopped rolling. She stared at it with a look he was all too familiar with. The look of a person waiting to die.

\"Finite incantatum,\" he said sharply.

She tried to move, to get away; but her arms and legs were too numb. She was gasping and coughing, she rolled to the side and heaved up her dinner. Severus was appalled to see the bleeding increase with each spasm. He muttered a healing charm that would stop the bleeding until he could get her into the castle.


When he approached her she started inching away and whimpering. He was relieved that she didn\'t have the energy to scream. \'Wouldn\'t that be a nice little thing to have to explain?\' He thought irritably.


\"Miss Granger!\" He barked. \"I am not going to hurt you! Don\'t you recognise me? It\'s Professor Snape!\"


His tone shocked her out of whatever nightmare world she was trapped in. \"Professor?\" She gasped, blinking up at him.


\"Yes,\" he replied in a softer tone. \"Now Miss Granger I need to get you inside. You\'re injured, and it\'s very cold out here.\"


She nodded and he saw her eyes drooping.


\"Miss Granger!! Stay awake!\" He commanded,as he approached her again. Her eyes snapped to his face and she watched him as he pulled her skirt down and draped her ruined shirt back over her chest and midsection. He took off his heavy cloak and draped it over her before lifting her into his arms.

Hermione struggled against him as the pain in her body crecendoed.

\"Miss Granger! Please stop before i have to sedate you!\" Snape barked.


\"Oh, it hurts!\" She sobbed.


Snape softened. \"I\'m sorry Miss Grager. Would you prefer it if I used mobilicorpus?\"


She grabbed at his robes. \"No!\"


\"Then you\'ll have to be still, so that I don\'t fall and kill us both,\" he said patiently, trying to gently adjust her. \"I have to take you to the hospital wing.\"

\"Please don\'t!\" She gasped. \"Please! I don\'t want anyone else to know.\" Her large brown eyes searched his face, pleading silently.


He stopped, surprised at her request. \"Miss Granger, the headmaster will have to be told as soon as he returns from the ministry. Accio basket!\" He added, remembering his potions things.


She nodded. \"Just him. Everyone else can be told I was only attacked.\"


He stared at her. She was saying she wanted him to take care of her. She didn\'t want to go to Pomfrey.


\"Miss Granger, I can\'t...I can\'t be seen showing a Gryffindor care...It would give rise to suspicions...\"


Her head drooped to her chest and she wept quietly. With that, he was broken. \"Allright Miss Granger, stop that now, I\'ll do it.\" He could get her into the castle without being seen. Or so he fervently hoped.


She cried harder, and he sighed as he walked toward the secret entrance to his quarters. He\'d never understand women.


He looked around before saying the password to the castle wall. \"Monkshood.\"


Hermione had gotten herself under controll and looked up to see the bricks rearranging themselves to make a door.


They stepped through into a dimly lit corridor.

AN: First chapter is done with! YAY! I know it was very depressing; but it will get happier. I know it was OCC for Snape; but we don\'t know a whole lot about him, which is why I love to write him! And just so there is no confusion.. Hermione is 18. ~18~ you got that?