schedule
May 26, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Great concept; but more detail could have been put into this.
I found in chapter 4 i think it was, that the whole "Having a wank" part was rather uncouth. I could have been written with much more eloquence and dignity.
Furthermore, the chapters should be somewhat longer, and much more explanation/story building could occur.
Personally; I advise you read through this story and take her example.
hp.adultfanfiction.net/story.php?no=600095424
I found in chapter 4 i think it was, that the whole "Having a wank" part was rather uncouth. I could have been written with much more eloquence and dignity.
Furthermore, the chapters should be somewhat longer, and much more explanation/story building could occur.
Personally; I advise you read through this story and take her example.
hp.adultfanfiction.net/story.php?no=600095424
schedule
March 23, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Yeah a new chapter! i was beginning to think that you had forgotten us. :) well i am very courious to see what happens next and i am hoping that you will post the next chapter soon! :) i am so wanting to see what lucius does and where they are going!
schedule
March 22, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Overall the story has potential however I feel that Hermione is out of character. She would be pissed off but she wouldn't lower herself by slouching and petulance. She would show she muggle born but with taste and she would use her intelligence and shape tongue to really make Him mad.. with that take it could really open up many possibilities for the couple. Also if the ministry passed a law it would have to apply to all purebloods, including the Weasley's especially if the law passed with harry and ron only engaged. Just some thoughts.. I do like the overall concept of the story.
sheri.
sheri.
schedule
March 22, 2013 at 12:00 AM
@8 great story update soon!!
DB
DB
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March 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I truly love this story, not only is it my favourite harry/fenrir but also the best mpreg I have read as well , not only that but it hasn't been written by a illiterate gibbon. Please update, pretty please with sugar on top :)
schedule
March 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Honestly, I think they need a good sit down talk. Lucius needs to stop trying to be controlling, and Hermione needs to relax a bit.
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February 7, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Bravo! Just finished Chapter 7, and they're a little short, but brilliant! I think you've managed to capture not only Lucius' personality, but Hermione's as well. I'm looking forward to more.
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January 24, 2013 at 12:00 AM
oh i love it! espeacial the last part! ;) post soon! i do hope that you have lots more for this story planned! :)
schedule
January 13, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I Love it! But could you please write a little longer? I'm looking forward for the next chapter.
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January 2, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Hi there. Intriguing story so far. Thank you. And, I look forward to Lucius learning that Hermione Granger is not someone to be trifled with! I can't believe he spanked her!! What an ass. He is looking forward to sleeping with her, but spanks her like she's a child?! Ugh!!! Come on Hermione... hex him where it hurts! :-) Thanks again and Happy New Year! HG4eva