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January 4, 2017 at 12:00 AM
Oh. My. God. You are the best! This story is awesome! I love it when people feel so guilty they could die! (Only when they deserved it...) Bless this story and the author, amen. (I am not actually Christian but still, amen.)
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February 27, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I just wanted to say that I love your stories! They're so sad and they really pull at my heart strings! I sincerely hope that you update some of your others stories someday! Until then, I'm bookmarking your stories written page!
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June 11, 2011 at 12:00 AM
You know, this story could be turned into a much longer, more detailed story...?
If you would permit me, I would be willing to give it a try. I'm lousy at coming up with story ideas but I do have a pretty good imagination.
Of course I won't try without your permission and naturally if I ended up ever posting it somewhere I would mention it was yours originally.
Whatever your answer, you can reach me varjoratsu@gmail.com
If you would permit me, I would be willing to give it a try. I'm lousy at coming up with story ideas but I do have a pretty good imagination.
Of course I won't try without your permission and naturally if I ended up ever posting it somewhere I would mention it was yours originally.
Whatever your answer, you can reach me varjoratsu@gmail.com
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April 23, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Err... nice, I guess. But, was this a story or a challenge/summary? You sort of summarized a whole story that could have been more than 300 pages long and shrunk it into a few short paragraphs. Nice idea, but... way too short.
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August 3, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Hi!
I can only agree with the first poster. It's a nice idea, but what you have written can only be called an outline or a summary. That's the main problem - you are summarizing too much and narrating too little. You can't actually feel for Harry, if there almost no scenes written directly(!) from his perspective.
Example: Instead of explaining that the Potter's regretted giving Harry away their entire life, why don't you write a scene of them living without him? The same goes for everything else you stated, but didn't describe.
I don't want to say anything about the content, because I simply skipped through and didn't look at all the details. But if you decide to make a "story" out of this - please tell me! :)
Fr
I can only agree with the first poster. It's a nice idea, but what you have written can only be called an outline or a summary. That's the main problem - you are summarizing too much and narrating too little. You can't actually feel for Harry, if there almost no scenes written directly(!) from his perspective.
Example: Instead of explaining that the Potter's regretted giving Harry away their entire life, why don't you write a scene of them living without him? The same goes for everything else you stated, but didn't describe.
I don't want to say anything about the content, because I simply skipped through and didn't look at all the details. But if you decide to make a "story" out of this - please tell me! :)
Fr
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July 18, 2010 at 12:00 AM
poor harry ! at least in the end he was happy.
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July 17, 2010 at 12:00 AM
There was a lot that happened in your story that you jam packed into one chapter. It was very, very rushed. Try to elaborate on some key points. Don't make everything so vague. Expand more, each section could have been a separate chapter. You can also describe the appearances of the characters or places they live in. I liked the plot, I just wished it were longer. Keep up the good work. :)