A Secret Worth Keeping

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A Secret Worth Keeping


Chapter One: Letters of Intent


Dear Professor Dumbledore,

Forgive me for not keeping in touch since my abrupt departure last September. I had wanted to speak with you, but unfortunately, other things happened that were beyond my control. The reason I am writing to you now is because I am in a bit of a confusing dilemma arising from my last night there and I think you will be able to help clear my mind. I do not know if you know anything about the reason I left that September night, but my problem started on that evening. I can’t go into details about what happened exactly at this time, but suffice to say that I am now the mother of a beautiful five-day-old son. I have named him Sebastian Samuel Snape, and yes, as you can tell by the name, Severus Snape is his father. There, you can see, lies the problem. Professor Snape doesn’t know, and for the most part doesn’t even know what happened that night. You see, I made sure that the incident was obliterated from his memories.

Please don’t ask what happened, just know that it wasn’t something either of us were looking for. He took what happened very badly and I was forced to erase it from his mind. It never occurred to me that I could have gotten pregnant, but then I now have Sebastian so that is a moot point.

Now I come to the problem that is tearing me apart. Do I tell Professor Snape that he has a son, or do I keep this quiet? I want him to know, but not if it puts him or our son at any risk. Under those circumstances I would demand that he not know.

Please, Professor Dumbledore, I sure could use your wisdom right about now, for I truly do not know what to do. I am staying at the Leaky Cauldron for a little while. Please owl me there.

Sincerely,

Hermione Granger

~00~


Dear Miss Granger,

I was overjoyed to receive your letter and equally shocked to learn that you now have a child. However, shocks are common and I recover quite easily nowadays. As for informing Severus about the child, that is indeed a dilemma. With Voldemort in such high power at this time, I fear for your son’s life if his paternal parentage is found out. I do agree that, as Sebastian’s father, he has a right to know.

Perhaps you could tell me a little of what happened that night. I know you asked me not to ask, but it may help me with my decision on what action to take, if any.

Yours truly,

Prof. Albus Dumbledore


~00~


Dear Professor,

I really don’t know how much to tell you or where to start. I have gone over it time and time again, and that night is firmly fused into my brain, but how much should I say?

They say to always start at the beginning, but then that would make this letter much too long and boring, so I will begin with my detention. I was to have detention with Professor Snape that evening and I was to assist in his laboratory. The problem was that when I arrived, Professor Snape wasn’t alone. Mr. Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy, that is, was with him. They were fighting. I walked into the midst of a very angry argument. I don’t think I have ever seen Professor Snape so enraged. Mr. Malfoy, who was equally as livid as Professor Snape was, grabbed onto my arm and started pulling me toward the fireplace. I don’t know what the fight was about, but by the way they looked at me, I had a sick feeling it was about me. I just don’t know; it could have been my imagination, but that is what seems to make the most sense.

Anyway, when Mr. Malfoy was dragging me away, Professor Snape cursed him, sending him flying. I remember falling and I must have hit my head because I blacked out. I only remember that when I reopened my eyes, Professor Snape was kneeling over me. Mr. Malfoy had him in the Imperius curse. It is enough to say that Professor Snape was forced to rape me. It wasn’t long after Professor Snape finished when Mr. Malfoy left, leaving Professor Snape a broken man lying next to me.

Professor Snape was highly devastated at what he was forced to do to me. He was so guilt-ridden that I took it upon myself to erase his memory. I took him back to his personal chambers then left. I decided that evening that not only was I to leave him in his chambers, but I had to leave Hogwarts. I still to this day do not know what their argument was about, but I didn’t feel safe there anymore. I was scared that it would happen again, and I didn’t want to put either Professor Snape or myself through that another time.

That is the story. What do you recommend I do now? Should I tell Professor Snape about Sebastian? I am worried about his mental state if he should learn the whole story.

Sincerely,

Hermione


~00~


Dear Hermione,

My dear, I am so sorry that you had to endure such devastating circumstances, and all alone, too. It is a testimony of how strong you really are to have survived this horrible situation and with your memories intact. It is sad that the memories could have not been erased from you as well. I am assuming you obliterated Severus before he could perform the contraceptive spell? An obvious statement, since you are now a mother to his child. I’m sure you weren’t thinking of getting pregnant at the time.

I have also taken it upon myself to check Hogwarts magical register and was delighted to see the child’s name on the list. It is wonderful to know that your son will be attending here in eleven years.

Now, as to telling Severus, I highly believe it is the right thing to do. I am certain that he would want to know, although I am at a loss as to how to approach him on such a serious topic. I will consider our options and will owl you when I have come up with something.

Yours truly,

Albus


~00~


Dear Professor,

Thank you! I’m sure you will help me come up with a less strenuous way of telling the professor the truth. I look forward to your next letter. It eases my mind.

Love,

Hermione


~00~


Dear Hermione,

I have decided that the best way to tell Severus is by the direct approach. I am going to give him copies of our letters and the register’s notice of Sebastian’s birth, with your permission of course. If you feel there is another way, please let me know.

Sincerely,

Albus


~00~


Dear Professor,

No, you are right, Professor Snape has always been a direct man. The direct approach would probably be the best. Should I be there? It would be difficult to get someone to watch an infant of this age, and I loathe to bringing him along, but again I will bow to your judgment.

Hermione


~00~


Hermione,

That will not be necessary. Severus has accidentally discovered our letters. I’m sure you will be hearing from him soon.

Sincerely,

Albus


~00~


SHIT


~00~


Professor Dumbledore,

He did? Was he angry? Upset? Oh no! What do I do now?

Hermione


~00~


Miss Granger:

I believe we have an issue to discuss. I shall be at the Leaky Cauldron this evening at seven.

Severus Snape


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CRAP


~00~


Professor Snape,

I will be there if I can find a sitter, otherwise I am in room four on the upper level.

Hermione


~00~


Miss Granger:

Room four. I will come directly to the room. There is no reason to draw attention to ourselves or the baby in the common room. I shall see you there. I look forward to meeting my son.

Severus Snape


~00~


GULP