My Dearest Hermione

My dearest Hermione,

I know this is a dumb notion; I know you can’t read this letter. However, I just wanted to catch you up on what had happened this past month. Potter and Ginny had a baby boy; his name is Albus Severus. He looks like his father and is just as mischievous. Yesterday, he threw up all over Potter right before an important meeting. The minister walked in on Potter in the middle of him cleaning himself. Apparently, laughing was not an appropriate response to Potter’s plight. I think if you were still here, you would have been a great mother. I know we talked about kids, but that seems like a long time ago. I don’t think I want kids anymore. I can’t see myself fathering any if you’re not the the mother. I wish I could go back to those days.

Mother changed around the gardens. I know you always thought they were pretty. I remember when we used to tend to the plants after the war. Your favorite flowers were the roses, especially the white ones. I brought white roses to you memorial service; I’d like to think you could see them some how. I know it’s a stupid notion, but I like to think you’re looking up from above like how you described when talking about your muggle religion. I hope I do get to see your smiling face again.

I wish it had been me to be killed, not you. I wish everything we talked about could come true. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we were married. Would we be that family couple that we used to make fun of when we were out? Maybe we would have constantly bickered but couldn’t live without the other? It hurts thinking of a relationship that can not be.

I know I know that I didn’t say this much, but I love you. I still do. I miss how you challenged me. I miss how your eyes would twinkle when you discussed something you enjoyed. I’m so disappointed in myself. I didn’t get to the Manor on time, and you were killed by a rogue Death Eater. It should have been me. I don’t deserve to live while you had your life taken. I was going to propose to you that day. The ring was in my pocket. I thought you might like to know. I put the ring on your finger at the service. I’d like to think you would have said yes.

I’m sorry that this letter took a turn for the worst. I guess I needed to express my feelings and get some closure. I’m sorry I let you get killed. I’m so sorry Hermione.