Lost in Dreams

Warning for teenage boysex! (The boys are about fifteen)

Written for nextgendarkfest 2010 on LJ. Thank you so much to lotrwariorgodss for a quick (but thorough) beta at the last second. To ms_anthrophy, my eternal gratitude for medical aid and musical inspiration.


"That is not dead which can eternal lie,
and with strange aeons even death may die."
H. P. Lovecraft


"Yes?"

Al stood on the doorstep of Malfoy Manor, wondering if rushing here unannounced was a good idea after all. He was soaked through, because the stupid Knight Bus could only take him to the gates, and it had been a long walk in the rain. The small, ugly house-elf squinted up at him with huge owl-like eyes.

"Yes?" it repeated. "What is you wanting?"

"I - um," Al faltered. "I need to speak to Scorpius?" He almost added 'please', but then he took another look at the creature's unpleasant face and thought better of it.

"Binky will go and ask young Master if he is busy," the elf announced, making no attempt to invite Al inside. It left the door open, though, and Al slipped in. He stood shivering in the huge, lavish entrance hall. It turned out he didn't have to shiver for long.

"Al!" Scorpius was hurrying down the big stairs on the other side of the hall. "Why didn't you owl first? You could have Flooed-" he caught Al's expression. "Is everything - Are you all right?"

Al looked down and bit his lip, trying to force down the tears that kept welling up in his eyes. Scorpius took a step forward, face full of concern. For a second Al thought that he was about to hug him. Knowing he couldn't take that without bursting into tears, he took a quick step back. "Yeah," he choked out. The last thing he wanted was for Scorpius to see him bawl like a home-sick first-year Hufflepuff. "Sorry for barging in here like this, but can I stay for a bit? They are driving me crazy."

Scorpius nodded. They were a subject Al complained about a lot. "We'll have to talk to Mum and Dad." Al flinched, and was immensely grateful to Scorpius when he went on, pretending not to notice. "But I'm sure it'll be alright. Let's get you cleaned up first. They'll have a fit if they see you dripping water all over the carpet." Al made an effort to return Scorpius' smirk and followed him up the stairs.

Scorpius' room was about twice as big as Al's back home. No, not home. Not anymore. Al cast a quick drying charm on himself, hoping to get rid of the stray tear that had forced its way onto his cheek. He was very glad that Scorpius was too busy digging through his wardrobe to notice. When he turned around, a set of robes in his arms, Al had managed to get his face back under control.

"Here, try these. They might be a little too big, but they're still better than that wrinkled thing you're wearing." When Al opened his mouth to protest, Scorpius winked at him. "I think your wet rabbit look is adorable, but Mum and Dad are all about first impressions."

A moment later Al found himself following Scorpius through the Manor, dry and surprisingly comfortable in Scorpius' old robes, to a surprisingly small and cosy drawing room. His eyes immediately fell on the table in the middle, laden with tea and scones and jam and all manner of delicacies. His stomach growled in anticipation; he had missed dinner and the smells were quite promising.

A woman's laughter startled him. Wrenching his eyes away from the feast, he finally noticed that two of the high-backed chairs around the table were occupied. Al had seen Scorpius' parents at King's Cross, of course, but somehow they looked much more formidable up close. Especially Scorpius' dad.

Mr Malfoy's cool grey eyes examined Al from head to toe, making him very uncomfortable. "Welcome to the Manor, Mr Potter." The man flashed a sudden smile that lit up his entire face and made him look so much like Scorpius that Al relaxed a bit, letting out a breath he hadn't realised he had been holding. "There's something I never thought I would say."

Despite his apprehension, Al couldn't stop smiling back. "Please, sir, I prefer Al. I'm not too crazy about my last name right now."

Mr Malfoy raised an eyebrow. "Trouble at home?" Al nodded. "Can't say I'm surprised," the man muttered, clearly more to himself than to Al.

Mrs Malfoy tapped her husband gently on the arm. "Draco, really! The boy is starving and you interrogate him at the doorway like a servant." She turned to smile at Al. "Do sit down and eat something, dear."

Spreading jam on his fifth scone, Al tried to explain the row. It had been completely ridiculous; all he had done was ask for a pet snake. There was no call for them to go crazy like that. They never let him do anything he wanted. They were stupid and unfair and always sided with James or Lily and left him out.

"You poor thing," Mrs Malfoy—Astoria, Al reminded himself—cooed, a hint of amusement in her voice. "Of course you can stay here until you calm down a bit. But," she said, sharing a look with her husband, "we must ask you to owl your parents and explain the situation."

Al opened his mouth to protest, but Mr Malfoy gestured him into silence. "We do not wish to be charged with kidnapping you, Al." His voice was stern. "There is enough bad blood between the families as it is. Can you imagine what your father would do if he heard about your stay with us from another source?"

Al winced. It was all too easy to imagine. His father did have a tendency to accuse first and ask questions later. "Can it at least wait until morning?" he asked, trying to stifle a yawn. The day had been too long and too emotional, and suddenly it was all he could do to stay sitting upright.

"Of course." Mrs Malfoy gave him a motherly smile that made his heart ache just a bit. "Look at you, you're falling asleep in that chair! Do you mind if we conjure you a bed in Scorpius' room? I would offer you his guest room, but," she paused to throw her son a stern look, "the room currently resembles a disaster area, and Scorpius won't let the elves in to clean it."

Scorpius smirked at his mother. "Like I said, I'm doing research there. The stupid things would just mess it up. It's pretty cool. I'll show you later," he added to Al.

~*~*~*~*~

Al is crying and his father towers over him, a grotesque giant full of malice. He shouts and shouts and Al wants to shout back but when he opens his mouth, nothing comes out but green smoke. It spirals around him, twisting into strange patterns that make Al's whole being tingle with raw power.

"I've had it with you!" Al is no longer crying. He lifts his wand and speaks a single word, loud and clear. After it leaves his mouth, he can no longer remember what it was, but it makes him grow, towering over the small, cowering old man that his father has become. A surge of power runs through Al and he laughs, a high, cold laugh that he has never heard before. The man's head bursts open, spraying blood and brains everywhere.

The screaming in the background disturbs him and he turns towards Lily, only to see it's no longer Lily screaming, but his mother. He advances on her, seeing his face reflected in her frightened eyes. It's twisted almost beyond recognition, mouth a cruel line beneath slits that resemble red scars more than eyes. He laughs again and flicks his wand. The image shatters as her mother's eyes explode, leaving nothing but black holes behind. Her mouth opens wide, showing rows and rows of sharp teeth. "That's it," the thing that was his mother whispers. "Don't fight it."

Al tries to scream as he drifts into that mouth, but his voice is gone again. A cold nothingness swallows him whole.

~*~*~*~*~

Something cold and wet splashed all over Al's face. He spluttered and jerked awake. Someone snickered close by and Al forced his eyes open, groping for his wand. Scorpius was standing above him, wand still pointed at his face.

"Good morning, Cinderelly. Are we awake yet, or do you need another Aguamenti?"

"Bastard," Al muttered and launched himself at Scorpius, sending his wand clattering to the floor. Scorpius had always been the stronger of the two, so after a while of rolling around the floor punching and biting at everything they could reach, Al found himself pinned down, helpless, with Scorpius' weight holding him in place. Before he had time to protest, Scorpius bent down and kissed him hard. Al was so surprised that he forgot to be angry and just kissed back. It felt so good, even better than he had imagined.

Scorpius had featured prominently in Al's wanking fantasies for months. Now that he was actually there, on top of Al, kissing him for all he was worth, Al wasn't about to complain. Fight forgotten, Al twined his fingers into his friend's hair to pull him even closer. He was getting hard and it could have been really embarrassing, but it wasn't, because Scorpius was hard too. He tried to move his hips to frot against Scorpius, who was frotting against him and it felt so amazing that Al's world narrowed down to that sensation and all that mattered was that he was coming, coming against Scorpius, who thrashed above him and moaned into his mouth.

A moment later, Scorpius rolled off of Al and both boys lay on their backs, catching their breath. "That was brilliant," Scorpius muttered. "Remind me to give you a Cinderelly wake up call every morning from now on."

Al turned to smirk at him. "You really need to reread your Muggle stories, mate. It's Sleeping Beauty, and the water has nothing to do with the story."

"Whatever." Scorpius smirked back. "The snogging's still there, right?"

"Maybe." To his embarrassment, Al found himself blushing. He changed the subject quickly. "You said something about research. Let's see it then."

"Fine. But it's not all that interesting." Scorpius opened the door next to Al's bed. At first Al couldn't see anything, because the curtains were drawn, leaving the room in near-darkness. The air felt colder than in the bedroom and Al shivered. A black shape loomed ahead of him, reminding Al of a dream he had had but couldn't quite remember.

Scorpius spoke a word and a circle of candles on the floor came to life, turning the looming presence into an ordinary cauldron, mounted on a pile of ashes. There was no furniture, apart from a small stool piled with books. The walls and ceiling were blackened with soot, like there had been a fire.

Al turned to Scorpius, his eyes wide. "What in the name of Merlin are you doing here?"

His friend shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm trying to contact the spirit world."

Al's jaw dropped. "Necromancy?" His voice broke and he tried again. "You're practising necromancy in your house? Right next to where we sleep?"

"Without success, so far." Scorpius made a face. "Don't look so shocked. All I've actually managed to do was almost burn the place to the ground."

The candles threw flickering shadows on the walls, and Al could have sworn there was movement among them. Ghostly hands reaching for him. He jumped when Scorpius took his arm. "What are you playing at?" he snapped, turning fear into anger. "We sleep on the other side of that wall!"

"So?" Scorpius clearly didn't see any threatening shadows or hear any whispering voices. Al decided he had to be going crazy.

"Nevermind." Al smirked, trying to shake the uneasiness that suddenly gripped him. "Want to show me how exactly you managed to start a fire?"

~*~*~*~*~

The small, dark cave smells of earth. The only light, an eerie glow, comes from a stone dais in the middle of the floor. When it comes closer, Al realises that it looks more like an altar. Or maybe a coffin. Whatever it is, there is a woman sitting on it. She is clad only in a white shift and her long black hair. Her heavily lidded eyes, looking like black holes in the dim light, are focused on Al, and there is a ghost of a smile playing on her lips.

"Ask me," she says.

"Why me?" The words are out before Al even thinks it. "I'm not the one who wants this."

She laughs, a low, melodious sound. "Ah, but you do. You want to belong, do you not?"

Al opens his mouth to tell her that he does belong, he belongs right here, with Scorpius, but the words sound hollow even before they come out. Empty and useless, rather like Al himself.

"Yes," she says and beckons Al closer. "Truth always hurts." She extends her arms and Al steps into her embrace. Cold arms wrap around him like a whisper from beyond the Veil. "So does love," she breathes against his neck. "You are much better off with neither. Aren't you?"

Against his will Al nods. The woman lifts up his chin and presses her lips against his, sucking life and warmth out of him. Darkness wraps around Al, and he welcomes it.

~*~*~*~*~

Al held up a framed photo of two boys smiling smugly at the camera, showing off their left forearms where they had drawn Dark Marks, badly, in black ink. The memory it awoke was strangely painful, like he was looking at a much younger, happier, more vivid version of himself. He was feeling so thin these days, stretched over too large a frame. Like he was only half here and half there, without ever quite knowing where there was.

Scorpius' arms wrapped around him from behind and Al leaned back, enjoying the closeness. "What are you moping about?"

"I'm not moping. It's just -" Al paused to find the right words. I feel like my life is over sounded much too melodramatic. I feel like I'm not the same person I was when this photo was taken. Yes, that was exactly how he felt. Just when he opened his mouth to share the revelation, an insistent tapping from the window interrupted him.

"It's for you again," Scorpius announced and let a very familiar tawny owl into the room. It flew a full circle over Al's head before it landed on his shoulder and shoved a piece of parchment at Al. "That's what, five now?"

"Five this week. Twelve in total." Al huffed. "They keep begging for me to come home. Screw them, I'm already home." He shooed the bird away and kissed Scorpius, letting the letter flutter to the floor unopened.

The kiss gathered momentum, and soon the boys fell onto Scorpius' bed in a tangled, panting heap. Clumsy hands fumbled with clothing, searching for skin. "Wait a second," Scorpius mumbled and crawled off the bed. Al took advantage of the absence of Scorpius' weight on him and got rid of the rest of his clothes. Just when he flung his pants to the floor, Scorpius returned, also naked and holding a small bottle of lube.

Al spread his legs to accommodate Scorpius and let out a small moan when slick fingers slid along his cock. They ghosted over his balls and circled his opening. "Do you want to?" Scorpius panted, lifting his head to look at Al.

There was a touch of uncertainty in his eyes and Al felt something warm and wonderfully real. "Only if you do," he whispered and pulled Scorpius down for a kiss.

Scorpius fumbled for the lube, spilling some on Al's thigh. Al brushed it off nervously as Scorpius' fingers returned to his crack. One finger breached him and he sucked in a shuddering breath. It felt strange and a little uncomfortable, but Al decided to endure it. It was bound to turn sexy any moment now, or else people wouldn't be doing it.

The finger wriggled deeper and brushed against something that made pleasure explode somewhere deep inside Al. This was more like it. He moaned aloud and pressed against Scorpius' finger, hoping to feel it again.

To his disappointment the finger withdrew. "Are you ready?" Scorpius asked in a breathy voice.

Al nodded, trying to keep his apprehension from showing on his face. He had no idea how people knew if they were ready to be fucked, but he knew that he wanted to feel Scorpius, wanted him to drive away the shadows that populated the corners of his mind.

Then there was no time for doubts. Scorpius was pushing into him and it hurt like he was being flayed from inside out. He bit his lip and tried to relax, but it wasn't possible. Not when his arse was being torn apart. Despite his best efforts, a small pained whimper escaped his lips.

Scorpius stilled immediately and looked down at him with eyes full of concern. "I'm hurting you, aren't I? Do you want me to stop?"

It was easier when Scorpius wasn't moving and Al had time to get used to having a cock up his arse. It still wasn't the earth-shattering experience Al had been expecting, but the pain was dulling and giving way to a strange fullness, that wasn't entirely unpleasant. "No, it's okay," Al ground out, steeling himself. "Keep going."

He was prepared for the pain this time, and it wasn't as bad as before. When Scorpius began to move in and out of him in a slow rhythm, Al found it easier to relax. He was actually beginning to enjoy himself when Scorpius moaned low in his throat and pistoned his hips forward a few more times, before collapsing on top of Al in a sweaty, boneless heap.

After catching his breath, Scorpius moved off of Al, his cock sliding out much more easily than it had gone in. Al took a deep breath. If ever there was a moment when he could bring it up without Scorpius taking the mickey, this was it.

"Scorpius," he started carefully. "Can we stop the necromancy thing?" Scorpius turned to look at him, an eyebrow raised, and an awkward silence spread between them. Al hastened to fill it. "I mean, I don't think it's fun anymore. I've been having these really creepy dreams and I - I think something's trying to come through."

Scorpius' face lit up. "You mean you think it's working? And you want to stop now? Are you mental?"

"I'm serious." Al tried again. "Scorpius, I'm scared." The admission cost him something, but Scorpius wasn't even listening. He just demanded to hear all about the dreams. Al grimaced, but gave in and did as he was told. Scorpius listened avidly, and when Al got to the part about the cave and the ghost woman, he bombarded Al with questions.

"Wow," he breathed finally, wearing the look that meant that he had just had an idea that Al wasn't going to like. Al shivered and crawled closer, determined to distract Scorpius before he suggested they try to invoke the woman on the spot. The distraction worked so well that Al became a bit distracted in the end, too.

~*~*~*~*~

The woman reminds Al of someone he used to know, someone who offered him hot chocolate and really awful biscuits when he was little. Someone who ... Turquoise hair. Teddy. Of course. But this is not her. "I think I know who you are," Al tells the woman. "You're Bellatrix Lestrange."

The woman laughs and swings her legs carelessly, kicking her heels against the coffin. "I think that maybe I was. But what does it matter anymore? Maybe you were yet another annoying Potter brat, once. Who cares?"

The walls of the cave expand, drift into infinity. Cold stars stare down at Al from the heavens and tall grass sways in the breeze. Tall shapes loom ahead of him. When they come closer he sees that they are standing stones, tall and majestic in the starlight. But they are not standing. They are dancing, dancing around Al in patterns both strange and familiar. Al feels the raw power again, like a melody right on the edge of hearing, once heard and never forgotten.

"Come dance with us," a thousand voices whisper. "We were here before your wands were made, we will be here when they are broken. Come dance with us." Al reaches out for them, longing for them, but a cold mist rises and blocks out the stars. Al feels ghostly hands reach for him and screams and screams.

~*~*~*~*~

A pillow hit Al squarely in the face. "Will you shut up!" Scorpius' sleepy, irritated voice was so safe and familiar that Al couldn't help pouncing on him. After a few minutes Scorpius was in a much better mood and Al had almost forgotten why he woke up screaming.

"Let's go for a walk," Scorpius suggested after breakfast. There was something smug about his expression that Al didn't really care for, but he agreed all the same. The weather was beautiful and it was definitely better than sitting in a dark room trying to call up spirits that Al knew were listening, but Scorpius insisted weren't there.

After a long walk through the grounds—Al had never realised just how huge Scorpius' home really was—they stopped in front of an earthen mound about as high as Al. At first glance it looked innocent enough, with grass and small yellow flowers growing on it, but the more Al looked, the less he liked it. There seemed to be something cold and evil emanating from it that made him shiver in spite of the warm sunshine.

"Guess who's buried there?" Scorpius asked in a casual voice, and with a sinking feeling Al realised what it was. Of course he knew that some of the older families still preferred the old-fashioned burial mounds to graveyards, but knowing they existed was not the same thing as seeing one. When he failed to answer, Scorpius went on with barely disguised excitement. "My great-aunt Bellatrix Lestrange."

A shiver of pure terror run down Al's spine. "Are you serious? The Bellatrix?"

Scorpius smiled. "Ah, I finally caught your attention. Yes, the one and only. With most of the family dead and her husband on his way back to Azkaban, there was no one else to claim the body. And since the Black estates were long gone by then, my grandmother had no choice but bury her here with the Malfoys." He snickered. "I'll bet she'd be pissed off about that. Apparently she didn't think too highly of my granddad."

While Scorpius was talking, they had rounded the mound and Al saw that there was an entrance: a dark, gaping hole arched with rectangular rocks roughly the size and shape of bricks. Scorpius smirked at Al. "Want to go in?"

There was nothing in the world that Al wanted less than to enter the tomb. But he knew that he would never hear the last of it if he admitted his cowardice. Shrugging, he stepped through the arched doorway. The second he was inside, he knew it was a bad idea. Cold darkness assaulted him, carrying the echoes of whispers. The smell of earth and decay was so horribly familiar that he would have frozen on the spot if it hadn't been for Scorpius, who bumped into him and pushed him forward.

"Let's see what we have here. Lumos!" In the light of Scorpius' wand, Al could see the very same earthen cave that he visited in his dreams. Even the stone coffin in the middle of the floor looked exactly how he remembered it. Except for the ghost woman. He was extremely grateful that she was nowhere in sight. But what if she was there, crouched behind the stone, ready to leap ...

The light went out. Al jumped as he heard a whisper from behind him. The words were familiar. "No, stop that!" He turned to Scorpius, nearly sobbing, no longer caring about looking cool and brave. Scorpius' wand-tip drew a glowing symbol in the air: the letter A with a small circle above it.

~*~*~*~*~

Al is at the tomb again, only this time it's night and all the flowers have dropped their petals. He looks around and sees identical mounds all around him. The doorways all face him like open mouths. There is something moving in them and he staggers back, trying to hide, but there is nowhere to run and white figures emerge from the blackness.

Hands grasp him from behind and he feels cold breath on his skin. His mouth opens into a silent scream as the wraiths surround him, pressing closer and closer. "Come with us," they all whisper in unison, voices filled with hunger and malice. More white hands reach for him, dragging him towards the circle of stones that wasn't there a heartbeat ago.

Al is pushed against rough stone, naked and vulnerable, as cold, dead flesh touches him. He is spread open, entered by freezing, numbing nothingness. This time he does not even try to scream. He knows he will not wake up. He knows it but still he surrenders to the darkness. In fact, he welcomes it. He is dancing with it, within it, the same patterns again and again.

~*~*~*~*~

"Al? Al, wake up!" Scorpius' voice broke through long, cold eternity and opened Al's eyes. "Wow!" Scorpius breathed. "How did you do that?"

"Do what?" Al's voice sounded a bit raspy, as if his throat was not quite the right shape.

"Your eyes! They flashed red just now!" Scorpius stared down at him with awe. "You'll have to teach me that trick!"

"Perhaps someday I will." The thing that had been Albus Severus Potter smiled and pulled Scorpius down for a kiss.