Reden

A/N: I've been tossing this idea around in my head for a few weeks now, but was putting off writing it in favor of working on “Inamorato”. Now, however, I can't seem to work on that, because this keeps circling around in my head. So I'm hoping if I get a few chapters of this out I'll be able to work on “Inamorato” again and, hopefully, finish it. This story starts when Harry is 16 and runs around the premise “What if Lily and James Potter really had died in a car crash?” and it isn't technically no-magic. It's just a different kind of magic. Hope you enjoy! ~ FA

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“I don't want to go, Siri!” Harry stomped his foot angrily, his hands fisted at his sides as he glared at his godfather, the man who'd raised him since he was a year old. “It'll just be a bunch of rich pricks!”

“Language, Harry.” Sirius admonished, eying his godson's flushed face. “You need to calm down. You know what happens when you get upset.”

Harry growled. “I'm not upset, I'm furious!” He started pacing, trying to work off some of the mad. “My friends all go to public school, Siri. And I have a hard enough time hiding who I am during school hours. How am I supposed to do it all the time at a boarding school?”

“You'll only have one other person in your dorm room. You can practice when he isn't there.” Sirius sighed. “You'll make new friends and you can write to your old ones and see them during the holidays.”

Harry growled again and the lamps and books and knickknacks in the library began to shake. “Why do you want me gone? What did I do?” He asked, a plaintive note in his voice. “I've been trying so hard, Siri...”

“I know, Harry. I know.” Sirius stood and walked over to his godson, wrapping his arms around Harry from behind. “I'm not angry. I promise.”

He leaned down and rested his head on Harry's shoulder, saying soothingly into his ear. “Calm, Harry. You need to calm yourself or you'll lose control.”

Harry forced himself to take several deep, calming breaths. He heard the room settle down as his emotions did. He felt the calm ripple over him, cool and soothing like water. He relaxed back against his guardian as his heart rate slowed to a normal level. He was still angry, still scared, still upset – but he was in control and that was what mattered.

“Better?” Sirius asked as he released Harry and took a step back. “Can you talk now?”

Harry squeezed his eyes shut, though his back was still to Sirius. “Siri, this is why I can't go. What if I have an attack while someone's around? What if I lose control and someone gets hurt?”

Sirius sighed and sat back down. “You used to think you couldn't control yourself long enough to go to school, but for three years you have. This is just the next step. You'll go and you'll get stronger and you'll get a better education at the same time.”

When Harry spun around to glare at him his green eyes flashing, Sirius added. “I wouldn't send you if I didn't think you were ready. And this isn't up for discussion any more. You leave on Thursday.”

“What!” Harry burst out, horrified. “I only have two days to pack and say goodbye to everyone? That's not fair!”

Sirius shook his head. “Maybe it's not, but you're getting on a plane on Thursday and then in a taxi and you're going to Drenton Academy and you'll be fine.”

“I hate you right now.” Harry whispered, squeezing his eyes shut again though tears ran down his cheeks anyway. “I love you, Siri, so much, for a million reasons, and somehow none of that matters because right this second, I hate you.” He opened eyes
that were so bright with tears that they looked impossibly green. “I really, really do.”

“I know.” Sirius said softly. “And I'm sorry. But this is what's best for you.”

Harry didn't say another word, he just left the room. Sirius watched his godson go, his heart aching. He knew Harry would forgive him one day, when he understood that Sirius really was only doing what was best for him. It just hurt to know that, in the meantime, Harry hated him. To know that he had to send Harry halfway around the world to give him a chance at a normal life. It hurt and it wasn't fair and it had to be done.

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Harry laughed tearfully as he was sandwiched between the identical twin brothers of his best friend. “One last Harry sandwich before I go?” He asked, his heart aching for what he was leaving behind.

The twins released him and George smiled. “Awww, don't cry now, Harry...”

“We'll still be here when you come back.” Fred continued, reaching out to wipe away a tear. “And I promise...”

“That we'll still love you.” George finished with a wink. When Harry laughed again, he added. “No promised, however...”

“That we'll wait for you. Can't be alone that long.” Fred said in a serious tone belied by his twinkling blue eyes. “Now, we'll leave you alone...”

“To say goodbye to our brother.” The twins left together with a final wave and cheekily blown kisses that Harry laughingly returned.

“I can't believe you're leaving tomorrow.” Ron said somberly as he followed Harry up the stairs to his room. “This is so unfair.”

Harry sighed and threw himself down on his bed. “I know. I still have to finish packing. I don't want to go, but Siri won't even talk to me about it anymore.”

Ron curled up on the bed beside Harry, pulling the slightly-smaller boy into his arms. “I'm sorry. I wish there was something I could do; some way to make this okay.”

Harry sniffled, burying his face in Ron's chest. “It's so unfair, Ron. How am I supposed to move so far away? How am I going to live without you?”

He looked up at Ron, lifting his head slightly until he was nearly nose-to-nose with the redhead. “How am I supposed to be okay when I can't see your face or hear your voice or touch you or...” He choked on a sob.

Ron stared into Harry's liquid-green eyes and leaned forward, touching their mouths lightly together. “You'll be fine, Harry. We'll call and text and the twins said I can go by their flat whenever I want to use their computer so we can chat on webcam.”

Long, calloused fingers wiped away Harry's tears with surprising gentleness and Ron touched their mouths together again, just as softly. “You're my best friend, Harry. Nothing changes that. Remember?”

Harry sniffled again, smiling weakly though his eyes were still damp and his lashes sparkled with unshed tears. “I know.” He laid his head back down on Ron's chest, nuzzling his neck with his damp face. “I love you, Ron. You're the best friend I've ever had and no matter how far away I am, that won't change.”

“Now, now, Harry. What if you find a boyfriend at this new school?” Ron asked teasingly. “Surely he'd be your best, best friend, wouldn't he?”

Harry giggled. “Maybe. If I get a boyfriend, though, I'm still allowed to kiss you, right?”

Ron squeezed Harry's waist tightly. “Always, Harry. Us kissing isn't a sexual thing anyway. It's just because we love each other so much and we're so close.” He nuzzled Harry's thick, long hair affectionately. “And any guy you're with had better understand that.”

“I'll make sure of it.” Harry promised with a soft sigh. “I know I need to pack, but Ron...” He snuggled closer. “Just...hold me for a little while?”

Ron wrapped both arms more securely around Harry's slender waist and rested his cheek against Harry's dark hair. “For as long as you need, Harry. Always.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

Harry tearfully hugged Ron just outside the security check point. “I'll write and call all the time, I swear.” He whispered against Ron's neck, clinging to the taller boy. “I'll miss you so much.”

Ron nuzzled Harry's hair and hugged him tightly. “I'll miss you, too. Call me as soon as you land?”

“Of course.” Harry pulled away, sniffling. He turned to Sirius and said softly. “I'll miss you, Siri...”

Sirius reached out and wrapped Harry in a tight hug. “I'll miss you too, Harry. I'm sorry, I really am, but this is what you need right now.”

Harry nodded tearfully. “I know why you're doing this, Siri, but it doesn't make leaving any easier.” With a final squeeze, he pulled away. “Well, bye...”

Before anyone could say anything else, Harry dashed tearfully through the security area, shoving his ticket and passport at the woman behind the podium before he vanished from sight. He stood sadly in the line to go through security, everything in him crying out for him to go back. And yet, some small part of him was tugging him onward. Knowing he had no choice, Harry stayed in line. Goodbyes sucked.

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A/N: Please review! They mean the world to me...they really do! ~ FA