Obsession

A/N : This is my first Draco/Ron attempt. Set it to the music of Broken Iris' A New Hope. Hope you enjoy it. Rate and Review please!


*Edit A/N* :If you happen to come back to this, I just wanted to tell you 'move_them_hands' that I think that was probably the best review I have ever gotten. I think you understood what I was trying to convey perfectly. Thank you so much and I'm thrilled that you enjoyed it. There needs to be more reviewers like you...>.> including me xD.

*Edit2 A/N* : To Artemis....Ouch. Sorry that it made you think of that. Draco did commit suicide, he just preserved his and Ron's beauty first. So I guess it is kind of like the old people who stuff their pets, but you have to remember, he was obsessed and full of himself, it only makes sense that he would want to keep Ron forever the way he was. Thank you for reading anyway and I'm glad that you could get some enjoyment out of it. Sorry if you found the ending lacking. And I'm very glad that you left a review. ^>^ Love it.


*****


Obsession. I used to wonder how it was a man could let himself fall so low. I used to tell myself that I was better than that. That I would never find myself a man so enthralled, so devoted that I forgot who I was. In hindsight, I realize now that he had controlled me from the start.

Obsessed. That is exactly what I was, what I am, and what I will always be.

I can’t escape him. Not even by death. Believe me, I tried.

It started as hate. A burning, fierce anger wrought my core. Oh how I loathed him. I loved to make him spit out my name like the blood from his busted lips; even better when he moaned it against the wall.

I lived for his hate.

When my father forced the mark upon me, I broke. For a time I lost all interest in what I once loved…even his hate. Potions were a thing of the past. My future was set in an unmarked stone of the Malfoy family cemetery and I had no hope- I truly thought so. More and more, I found myself wondering the halls in despair. They were the only solace I could afford. What ever his own reasons, he too loved those halls and when we met, we collided. Our curses were legend- if only to us. He was the only thing that made me feel alive again. Our fights kept me from dying inside.

I’m certain he never knew it, but without our duels I would have become a mindless follower of the Dark Lord.

That first crack of knuckles against flesh will forever be burned in my mind, though I cannot, for the life of me, remember who threw the first punch. He felt it too – I know he did. It was in his eyes when he pulled back his fist. He couldn’t resist our hate; he felt it as acutely as I. And I was only so willing to give him what he wanted – what he needed; what I needed as well. The trickling of our blood, the way it mingled together on our broken skin — it was a glorious sight that sent shivers down my spine. His groans of pain had the ability to make my heart skip a beat. I’m certain he never knew that either.

I couldn’t tell you how many times we met in the empty, darkened corners of the night, itching to break each other down until we couldn’t stand another hit, until we were too tired to do anything but sit in awkward, yet companionable, silence. Obsession- it sets in quickly. I did so many things; all for him. I even went so far as to learn advanced healing magic so that I could intensify our fights without worrying that I would break him. So many things about him made my heart jump. That he let me heal him afterwards, I think, was the one thing that changed me most of all.

Hero Potter and his little bint of a girl took him for granted. But not I. No, never would I take the man of my obsession for anything less than what he truly was.

So I took him from them. Slowly at first, I captured his hate and then his mind, his lust, his heart, until bit-by-bit he was all mine.

Beyond our random excursions, he was out of reach and I underestimated how far my need for him would break me down. I guess you could say it was already love. I didn’t have any of him, yet I couldn’t let him go. Watching his retreating back on those nights, I realized I knew deep down that this- whatever it was I felt- would not end well. I hoped that he would be the one to kill me on the battlefield. If he were the one to take my last breath, I would be at peace even in hell. But you have to remember- things seldom turn out like we believe they will. Fate didn’t seem to like my idea of happiness.

My friends were useless too. Blaze never understood how badly the mere mention of his name, the barest sight of him, boiled my blood. Pansy didn’t care as long as she got to hang from my arm at the blueblood parties. Crabe and Goyle, bless their clumsy minds, were the only ones that seemed to understand my passion, for they had a passion of their own. It’s such a shame they didn’t make it past the war, but I couldn’t let them carry out their orders. I needed him too much and he wouldn’t get out of the bloody way. Potter was just too damn important to him.

Always Harry bloody Potter.

All I could think of in that moment was how badly I wanted to be the one he protected with his life, and it was then that I realized how far I had fallen. Suddenly I was the boy who had flown to close to the sun. My melting wings, made of black and tainted blood, fell apart at the seams, as I pointed my wand at the back of my friend’s heads. Staring into his courageous and half-terrified eyes, I didn’t hold back. I didn’t blink as their bodies slumped to the ground, and he looked at me as though there was nothing else in his world, all while mine shattered down around me. Not even his girlfriend’s voice could steal that from me then. Mere moments instantly changed the course of our future. I had a chance. His beautiful blue eyes said it all.

I shifted his world. I shook the ground beneath his feet. Me, I did that. Not potter. Not his bint girlfriend. ME.

But I also changed my world, so immensely I shudder to think of the consequences. Suddenly, at 16, I was a killer, and not for the side I was expected to be on. I had ‘saved the golden trio.’ I had a chance to take what was rightfully mine at the same time that I lost everything I was inside. They covered for me, lied about the whole thing so that I wouldn’t be tortured and disposed of by my wonderful master. I suppose I was grateful. But really I was scared shitless.

That night he approached me in the hall and I was eager to let him tear my flesh in two. I saw his fist coming but I didn’t try to block it; I was in desperate need of the rush it afforded me. I closed my eyes, waiting for that audible crack, but it never came. Instead, he hit the wall and I looked up at him, confused. Sapphire eyes bore into mine. He was furious -it was obvious- so why wouldn’t he just hit me?

To this day I do not know the answer.

Desperation took over my mind and I shoved him backwards, sneering. Pathetic, I called him. Foolish, he dared to call me as he fumed and glared and wanted to hit me but didn’t. My stomach did a flip as his beautiful lips twisted in a snarl. He slammed me up against the wall, pinning my arms beside me. My head hit the brick. My vision swam. It only served to make my heart beat faster. This was what I lived for. This was what I killed for.

Why, Malfoy? He'd asked me, gripping my wrists tight until they bruised, but I had no answer to give – at least not one I thought he wanted to hear. So I smiled; I didn’t know what else to do. It must have been a good enough answer because he never asked me again.

Cautiously he drew closer, his grip stronger and I felt his body heave a great shudder as though it had been my own traitorous limbs that shook instead. My obsession was no longer angry, he no longer wanted to fight, but I needed something from him, something to take away the ache like only fighting with him could do. So I leapt from the cliff I’d been abandoned to. I kissed him and – it - was - electric. It was epic. He pulled away from me and ran, but for a short moment he kissed me back.

In the course of one single day I had lost my humanity, lost my soul, saved a life, and kissed a boy. It sounds silly, I know…but for me, that’s how it was.

From that night on we no longer clashed fists in the effort to save our sanity. Weeks went by before he came to me again. I nearly gave in to my despair then, but he’ll never know how close I came to letting him go. Those long days were like a waking nightmare. I saw his face at every turn. A glimpse of his wild red hair sent my knees to the floor. I was ill in my obsessions and when I felt his eyes watching me I’d pray he would come back before my will gave out.

Someone must have been listening, because somehow, without even suspecting, I had captured his mind and heart. Our strange excursions resumed just when I needed them the most. I had been given a mission I knew I couldn’t complete and he used his body to make me forget my death sentence. We fought more fiercely than ever, but this time it was for dominance over one another’s flesh in a completely different way. At first, it had been rushed, and desperate, and completely maddening in all the right ways, and when our lust had been sated it was slow, gentle…it was love. How I made it through my life until then, I’ll never know.

Summer never came for us the way it came for others. A war I wanted no part in raged for hours on the school’s grounds. I had failed my mission, like I knew I would, and cowered in the corners like a fool, desperately searching for him, for any sigh of his ginger locks. I was never on their side. I had to tell myself that just to keep from buckling under my fear. Keeping my obsession safe…that was my sole mission now. I scanned the destruction, flinging curses at my own men. They never knew what him them.

Finally, in the heat of it all, I saw him. There beside Potter -always blood Potter-, a flicker of hope. I cursed my way through the masses to get to him. Our eyes met and he nodded his acceptance. He smiled as he took my hand. God help me, he burned away all the hate I had and gave me new wings; beautiful, white wings that could not melt by the sun for he was the sun to me. What was I to do? I couldn’t help but loose all my senses. There are no words with which I could adequately express how I felt. He was alive. I hadn’t missed my chance to protect him. This mission, by my all, I would not fail.

Bolts of light in every color bounced around us as we stood back to back deflecting here, cursing there, healing each other when we had the chance. Bodies dropped, dead where they lay, but I had him and nothing else mattered.

The look on father’s face was priceless. I smirked as I watched Him fall. I was free, finally free. The Dark Lord is no more. Those words echoed in the bitter evening air, thick with the smell of scorched ozone, blood, sweat and dirt. The war was over and he forgot the one thing that a Malfoy should never forget. Do not drop you guard around an enemy. Oh how easily the words of the killing curse escaped my lips. He couldn’t hurt me any longer. Gods be damned, I was wrong again.

That bastard took with him…one last piece of my soul.

I couldn’t stop it. I saw it coming, and I couldn’t save him. His hand slipped from mine and I was filled with hate once more. His body slumped, limp in my arms and I was torn apart. His last breath was my undoing.

I cried.

A Malfoy never cries, but I cried anyway. There was nothing left to do but cry, so I held onto his body until they ripped it from me. Obsessed, I kissed his dead lips, brushed his limp hair, held his weightless hand and murmured into his unhearing ears, whispers of safety and reassurance. None of them understood, though I truly think that Potter tried - always bloody Potter.

But, I just couldn’t let him go.

I don’t know how long he was in the ground before I made up my mind, and I dug him up again. I brought him here to the manor, preserved his beauty – preserved my own- and encased him in a coffin of glass made for two.

As my last breath slipped away, I hugged him tight. He was mine forever now.

I finally found peace, my love, my obsession…my Ron.

Are you at peace too?

*****