Wingardium Leviosa

Wingardium Leviosa
By Kireania

A/N: So I know I haven't updated anything recently but this idea just wouldn't go away besides it's really funny. Nothing really immature here just humor. Enjoy and watch out I haven't beta'd this yet lol.

EDIT: I am highly confused as to what this site wants from a disclaimer so I'm trying to cover my bum here and say that I own nothing besides the idea behind this crack fic. The fandoms are not mine, neither are the characters (harry potter nor Transformers). Ummm I am in no way shape or form making money off of this.

I hope that fixes everything.

R&R



The Forbidden Forest was always off limits and rightfully so. There was never a forest more dangerous, more overflowing with ravenous creatures, darker, spookier, deadlier...or even one more ridiculous than Hogwart's very own Forbidden Forest. And none knew this better than a young seventeen year old boy named Harry Potter. Many of his secret adventures happened around the edge and sometimes even within this deadly forest. Today was one of those days where his need to roam and find something to do brought him in the forest, even though he had been told many times before not to enter such a place without an escort.

Harry was having a rough time trying to fall asleep, a recent vision from Voldemort clouded his mind and he couldn't even bring himself to close his eyes in attempt at slumber. Huffing and sick of staring at the same cover over his bed, Harry slipped out of the canopied bed and quietly traded his bed clothing for over sized jeans and a rough looking shirt. Both were hand me overs from his enormous cousin Dudley...but he really didn't care. Not only was he used to it, he actually thought they were somewhat comfortable. Finishing up his exchange of clothing by slipping on a jacket Harry quietly slipped out of the dark room, happy that he escaped without waking a single one of his dorm mates.

Getting out of the common room was easy, especially with how much practice he had from his many years at hogwarts. Watching as the Fat Lady's portrait slid shut with a soft click he gave a small smile and tiptoed to the shadows that lined the castle like walls. Hand outstretched to make sure there were no major obstacles on his way, Harry silently made his way out of the castle and onto the lush lawns that surrounded the school. Looking around Harry tried to debate where he wanted...no needed to go to think. Lake or Forest...Lake or Forest...Lake or Forest....Forest. Turning his body to face the intimidating woods Harry almost stopped to second guess his decision, but that moment of indecision passed by and he was walking up to the woods.

The dark shadows stretched out to him beckoning him forward into their grasps, and like a sailor hooked on a siren's song the wizarding world's saviour entered the black abyss without a second thought to his safety...or the safety of the person following him. Harry walked through the forest though if there was a path that he was following only he knew of it. His mind was on everything except his surroundings, thus making it very easy for his stalker to follow him and creep closer by the minute.

GRRRIIIIIPPPPPPPPPCCCHHHH

A sudden shake to the ground and a loud sound came from nowhere and caused the Boy Who Lived to fall on his ass. Blinking Harry's mind swam back to the present and his current location very slowly only to find a very familiar laughter coming from behind him. Turning his head Harry caught sight of the pale form that he could recognize with his eyes closed. The pale blonde hair, regal clothing, and that voice all gave him away. Draco Malfoy was in his thinking space. Frowning Harry got up and dusted off his bottom before he even spoke, still trying to figure out what caused him to drop to the ground to begin with.

"Malfoy why are you following me?" His voice was calm with only a tidbot of confusion.

Snorting Draco Malfoy straightened himself up and drew his lips into the smirk that he was known for giving. "Need I have any other reason to follow you around than to get you in trouble?"

Harry shrugged and looked back in the direction that he had been heading and then looked back at Draco. "Well I would prefer to be alone right now...so if you don...."

GRRRRIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPCCCCCHHHHHH

Another shake and sound came. This time Harry was actually present enough to stay upright and recognize that this had been what had gotten him before. Looking over at Draco, Harry saw the boy trying to cover up his confusion and fear as too what exactly what going on. Based on the noise level and the fact that the ground shook, it couldn't be anything good.

"P...Potter, what...what was that?" He tried to sound collected but as always it failed. Draco Malfoy was not known for his bravery anyways.

"I don't know, but I am going to find out." Harry didn't even pause to ask if Malfoy wanted to join him because honestly he doubted the boy would want too. But just a moment after he started walking away Draco was by his side and almost clinging to him for dear life. "Malfoy I doubt that clinging to me is going to save you if something is hungry..."

"Don't be foolish Potter. I'm not clinging I'm merely making sure to keep up with you just so you don't get any funny ideas about tripping or tricking me. Clinging to you? A Malfoy never clings..." GGRRRRIIIPPPPCCCHHHH, "Ok maybe sometimes we do." Malfoy was indeed clinging to Harry's arm at that moment too afraid to let go.

They walked on in silence, trying to figure out where the loud sounds were coming from...and after just about ten minutes of silence besides the occassional Grriippppcchh a new sound popped up.

"in da um le sa" The sound was muffled and hard to make up but it was something so the young boys moved towards that sound. Every few feet that new sound came again and again.

"Wingardium Leviosa...no no no no that's not it. I swear I'm doing it right...I'm following all the instructions. Swish and flick...yea that's right...hmmmm" There was a pause in the deep voice. "Let's try this again...Wingardium Leviose! Nothing again...Maybe this isn't the right type of wood. Hmmm that looks like willow...I do believe thats one of the woods that is used..."

GGRRRRIIIIIIPPPPPPCCHHHHH

Harry and Draco had moved forward enough to see a huge tree being ripped out from the ground. for a moment it blocked their view of what was actually doing the pulling but when the dirt settled and the tree was by the side of the voice's body the boy's were speechless. Right there in the middle of a huge pile of trees was a giant metal robot, red and blue in many places. It's eyes were bright blue and though neither boy was an expert at robot faces...this one seemed comfused, a moment later they saw why.

Optimus Prime picked up the tree and looked it over before nodding, this time he was definitely going to be able to do that damn levitation spell that a book that Sam had leant him talked about. If humans had such a powerful resource such as Magic then by Primus he was going to learn to harness it as well.

"Wingardium Leviosa!!" He waited for a moment to see something...anything rise, but nothing did. Totally frustrated Optimus threw down the giant willow tree and huffed loudly before he looked around for a better tree. it had to be the wand thing, that was the only thing he was doing wrong, everything else was exactly like how the book said. As he searched for a new tree that would help him he spotted the two frozen and in awe students. Optics brightening Optimus instantly realized that his new companions were from the school that he had read about. Excited he spoke to them.

"My name is Optimus Prime and I am from the planet Cybertron. I have recently been entrusted with the knowledge of one of your species greatest weapons...Magic. I came here to see if I could learn to harness this weapon so that I might be able to end my kind's war...but I have had no success in harnessing this Magic. Maybe you two could help me? You see I have read this book...Umm the title is Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone. And it clearly defines how you do a levitation spell. And apparently it is considered a basic spell, but even with many different types of wands I have had no luck. could you tell me what I am doing wrong?" Hope was radiating from glowing eyes staring down at the two young wizards.

"A book? Potter you have a bloody book out about you and this school? And it is apparently being read by Muggles and giant things. Are you serious?" Draco instantly started off on Harry, his fear causing him to do something to help him forget about the giant metal alien in front of him.

"Hey shut it Malfoy I didn't know there was a book like that..." Green eyes flashed angrily as Malfoy started ranting and accusing him of many things. Harry knew he was just being unreasonable like always.

their argument escalated and each forgot about the giant alien robot that had asked for their help, as they turned and started arguing about the fact that there was a series out based on Harry's years at Hogwart's. They were still arguing when they got out of the Forest but a hidden root caught Malfoy by the surprise and with him went Potter. Let's just say the position they landed in caused for activities much more entertaining than arguing to occur.

While back in the newly made clearing Optimus Prime sat in the middle of a huge pile of trees, upset that he still couldn't harness the human's secret weapon known as Magic.

Suddenly though he got an idea, "Maybe I need to enroll in the School in order to learn such things," nodding to himself he smiled behind his mask. Tomorrow morning he would go to the Headmaster and ask to be enrolled in some classes. Surely that would help him out. "I'll know magic in no time!"