Anniversary?

Hey guys! This is just a quick one-shot that I thought would be funny. Please read and review!

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What day was it?


It wasn’t her birthday. Of that he was certain. Severus had all but tattooed that little fact on his hand in the attempt to remember it. So it wasn’t that, he thought. The holidays were over, thank Merlin, as he didn’t think he could take much more Christmas cheer or have to wear that gods awful sweater. He didn’t wear it out in public, but he did wear it at home if only to keep the peace as it were.


So it wasn’t the holidays or her birthday. Was it an obscure holiday he had never heard of? Was Groundhog’s Day a new national holiday that no one told him about? He snorted. It was hard to take any event seriously, especially if it were named after an overgrown rodent. Besides, he doubted it was that either.


He was at a total loss as to what was so important that Hermione left to go shopping for special clothing. That woman never shopped for special clothing unless she planned on making him go through hell at some event that they would have been better off not going to. But having checked the calendar, he saw that wasn’t the case at all.


And then there were the questions!


“Severus, what color do you prefer me in?”


“I prefer you in nothing at all,” he muttered, as he was carefully measuring out a small amount of pollen to go into an allergy potion he was making. “Why?”


“No reason,” she whispered, and walked away.


Her next question was asked ten minutes later with, “Do you like honey dust or chocolate paint more?”


Severus looked over to her frowning. “Our wedding anniversary isn’t until August.”


“I know,” she said. “The question…”


“I don’t know what either of those things are.”


Giving a little clap, she walked away from him with a large grin on her face, which made him nervous.


So what day was it? What was he forgetting? There had to be something, right?


“Severus, do you like lobster or steak for dinner?”


“Steak,” he muttered, stopping what he was doing completely this time to look at his little wife. “What…”


“And would you like soup or…”


“Soup, as the weather is more conducive to it,” he interrupted. “What are you about, witch?”


“Nothing,” she answered, walking away from him.


He flooed Lucius to ask him if he had forgotten some important date. The blond former Death Eater hadn’t a clue what Severus could be forgetting.


“Well, let’s think,” Lucius said casually. “What month is it?”


“February,” he answered quietly.


Lucius frowned. “It’s that love holiday. What is that name? Draco told me about it once. It has something to do with chocolate and copious amounts of sex.”


Frowning he muttered, “Valentine’s day? But that’s not for another week.”


Lucius shrugged. “Perhaps your witch is getting a jump on it?”


“She is always one to be prepared for these things,” he replied, and then looked over to him. “Chocolate and sex, you say?”


“Yes, copious amounts of each. Though I must say I haven’t a clue what it means by that. Is it just one or two more orgasms than you would have normally or is it fucking to the point of needing fluids injected into your veins and tube feedings?”


Sneering Snape said, “Something tells me that would be going too far.” Severus then left, never seeing his friend’s face breaking out into a grin behind him.


He even went to see Albus Dumbledore's portrait at Hogwarts, something he swore he would never do when he was not working.


“It’s not your birthday,” Albus murmured from his portrait, looking contemplative. “Perhaps she has some good news to depart to you?”


“There’s no such beast,” he muttered, sipping on his tea.


Albus grinned and if at all possible his portrait’s eyes were twinkling more than when he was alive! “If you’re positive…”


No matter whom he went to, what he thought of, Severus couldn’t think of a single thing it could be. Finally, she returned from shopping and he found her unpacking the take out meal she had gotten. She was about to take a small shopping bag from her favorite store that sold expensive knickers to their bedroom when he blocked her path.


Leaning down until his nose was practically touching hers, he demanded, “What is this day?”


Puzzled she asked, “What?”


“What is so important that you not only bought dinner, but an expensive pair of t-back knickers I’m more than likely going to rip from your body?”


She gave a slight shiver. “Really?” Licking her lips she whispered, “Perhaps I don’t have a reason.”


“You always have a reason,” he snapped, standing up straight. “You are a perfect combination of all four of the houses, my dear. And if there is any part of you I know without a doubt, it is the Slytherin in you.”


“You should,” she said dryly. “As you’re the only Slytherin in me.”


“That isn’t…” He took a deep breath. “Why is today so special that you were asking me all those questions and acting as if today were a holiday or anniversary?”


Smiling she said, “Well…uh…you see…it’s this silly anniversary that I just usually celebrate by myself, but I thought since we’re living together…”


“Married.”


“And married, we should observe the event together.”


“And what would this be celebrating?” he demanded softly.


She worried her lower lip. “It’s a bit embarrassing.”


“Tell. Me. Now.”


“It’s the anniversary of the first time I masturbated thinking of you.” His eyes went wide at her words. “I kept thinking about your hands and voice and I couldn’t help myself. Next thing I knew I was in the girl’s restroom, frigging my wet, hot pussy and climaxing as I screamed your name over and over again. I was so embarrassed over this, I escaped the bathroom as quickly as I could.”


He leaned back on his heels, his face unreadable before saying, “So that was you? I should have known.”


Blinking at him in shock, she whispered, “You heard me?”


“Heard you? I went into the next stall, pulled out my raging hard on, and stroked my cock in time with you,” he growled as he pulled her into his arms. “I even went looking for you afterwards, but you had escaped.”


Smiling slowly, she murmured, “Not for long I didn’t.”


“No,” he said, scooping her up off her feet and sweeping her into the bedroom. “Not for long.”


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