23 Positions In a One Night Stand

23 Positions In a One Night Stand

By: Snapes_Goddess


Please forgive me for what you are about to read…A friend wanted a couple on equal footing sexually, both eager, willing and she wanted it raw…so this is what came of it..


WARNING : PWP ahead!!!


Inspired by the song Get Off by Prince.



The pub was flat out noisy as the wizarding world celebrated the Chudley Cannon’s third consecutive world cup win. Between the loud, raucous laughter of the patrons and the blaring music it was nearly impossible to hear ones own thoughts. Hermione, not much of a Quidditch fan, slipped away from her rather rowdy friends and settled in on one of the large leather sofas in the corner. She was pleasantly buzzed but nowhere near drunk as she engaged in one of her favorite pastimes, people watching.


She was engrossed in the observation of what she liked to call wizard mating behavior when she felt a large body flop onto the sofa beside her. She turned her head to find a rather red faced Draco Malfoy sitting next to her, his head resting on the back of the sofa as he stared at her.


“Hello, Hermione.” He said with a crooked grin. He must be drunk; she thought when she heard her first name slip past his lips. Even though they had become friendly in recent years he still called her Granger most of the time. “What are you doing over here all by yourself?”

“Watching people.” She turned her gaze back to the bar and the people she had been observing previously. Draco followed the line of her gaze and frowned.


“Blaise? Why are you watching Blaise? You don’t want to shag Zabini do you?” He blurted. She rolled her eyes and shook her head; thankful she had stopped at two drinks else she would probably have slapped him.

“No, I don’t want to shag Blaise. I’m just observing his behavior is all.” She said.

“Why? What is so interesting about Blaise?” He asked.

“What?” She furrowed her brow and angled her head, trying to hear over the music that seemed to get even louder.

“Why are you so interested in him?” She jumped; Draco’s lips were right against her ear. She shivered as his hot breath tickled her ear and tried to ignore the fact that he was sitting so close.


“I’m not interested in him, just his behavior. He’s been watching the brunette in the blue shirt for over an hour like a predator waiting for the right moment to strike. Now he’s re-tucking his shirt and smoothing his trousers, preening and ruffling his feathers to attract her attention. Oh…there he goes, stalking her like a snake after a mouse. “ Males of all species were just the same.


“Blaise is a man-whore, pay attention to me.” Draco said, clasping her chin and turning her to face him. “I am far more interesting than Zabini.”


Draco had been trying to get her to notice him for months but she always seemed to stare straight through him. He was at a loss, the things most women found attractive about him didn’t seem to work on her.


“You’re drunk, Draco.” She laughed nervously as she wrapped her fingers around his wrist and pulled his hand away.

“No, I’m not.” He said. “Why don’t you like me? I’m rich, I’m good looking, I’m intelligent and I try desperately to be a good boy.” He was batting his eyes at her playfully and she started to laugh.

“I like you just fine, Draco, now stop acting like an idiot.” She said, shoving him away from her and reclining back against the sofa beside him.

“I love this song.” He said, his lips twitching when an older club hit began blaring, the lyrics were suggestive and sexually charged.

“You would.” She scoffed just as the lyrics 23 positions in a one night stand… were spoken. “The lyrics are misleading, there is no way you can manage 23 positions in a one night stand.”

“Says who?” Draco asked.

“Says the laws of nature! If you reason it out, a one night stand lasts approximately eight hours from the moment the couple decides to leave whatever venue and parts ways come morning. A man can not…ejaculate…twenty three times in eight hours.” She said, blushing as she realized the conversation she had unwittingly initiated.

“Well, it’s a worthy endeavor but what makes you think that every position has to end in orgasm? You can get into several positions and only come once.” He loved the bright red flush slowly creeping over her chest and neck.

“None the less, twenty three in one night is a little too far fetched.” She turned her attention back to the crowd where Blaise was dancing with his prey. Draco let his eyes rove over her from the wild mane of curls draping her shoulders down over the plump breasts hugged lovingly by white cotton, to lush hips and thighs encased in dark denim. She didn’t dress to catch a man’s eye but she had certainly caught his.


“It isn’t that far fetched.” He said. “Are you a betting witch, Hermione?” She turned back to him and the breath rushed out of her lungs. He was leaning back on the sofa, his eyes heavy and smoldering with a lazy grin lifting his lips.

“Depends on the wager.” She said, her voice high and trembling.

“I bet you that if you come home with me I can have you in twenty three positions before sunrise.” He drawled huskily. “If I fail then I will take you to dinner tomorrow night.”

“Generally dinner comes before you take a woman to bed.” She said.

“I like being unique. Come on, Hermione, take me up on it, I dare you.” He teased. She pursed her lips and let her gaze slide over him. Tall, handsome, lean and tightly muscled, he was a handsome devil. But she didn’t buy his little act at all; he was just screwing with her.


“Alright, should we go now or do you want to hang out for a little longer?” She asked. His eyes widened and he sat up straight.


“Seriously?” He was certain she would balk, maybe even run away.

“Sure, why not? It’s been awhile for me and I have needs like any other witch.” She shrugged her shoulders casually.

“Damn, Hermione….I guess I didn’t think…”

“I knew you were full of it, Draco.” She scoffed.

“You think I was joking?” He saw the look on her face and realized that she thought she was calling his bluff.


“Of course you are joking, you would never…” She was silenced when his lips covered hers, his teeth nipping her bottom lip, forcing her mouth to open and admit his questing tongue. She resisted at first but then slowly she relaxed and began kissing him back, her arms wrapping around his neck tightly. He kissed her as though he wanted to devour her, not caring that they were in a public place. He didn’t pull away from her until his lungs ached from the need for oxygen.

“Still think I’m joking?” He asked breathlessly.

“Twenty three by morning?” She asked, staring at his lips longingly. “You’re on.”

Draco wasn’t about to give her a chance to change her mind. He had her by the hand and was dragging her at breakneck speed through the crowded pub, oblivious to the group of wizards and witches watching them curiously. He dragged her out into the alley behind the pub and without warning apparated them away. They reappeared in back of Malfoy Manor beside a deep blue pool of water reflecting the moonlight.


Draco didn’t want to waste any time getting her naked and dispatched with both of their clothes in short order. She gasped and tried to cover herself but Draco was already pulling her into his arms and tugging her into the warm water with him. He kissed her as the water embraced them. As he moved deeper she had to wrap her legs around his waist to keep her head above water.

“Draco….your parents…” She gasped, clutching the back of his head as his lips tormented the side of her neck.

“Sleep like the dead.” He said, lifting her out of the water and capturing one wet, puckered nipple between his lips. Her back arched and he walked her slowly through the water until her back hit the tiles of the pool wall. “Position one, worshipping the mermaid.” He whispered. He lifted her higher and she braced her arms on the ledge as he pulled her legs over his shoulders. He cupped her plump backside in his hands and without a word he buried his mouth between her thighs. She nearly screamed out in surprise as his tongue began to ravish her tender folds, his grip on her ass preventing her from moving.


She tightened her thighs on his head, her heels digging into his back as she tried not to cry out. The last thing she wanted was Lucius Malfoy to find her with her legs wrapped around his son’s head. Slowly Draco eased his assault on her body, his lips softening and moving away from the needy core of her body to ease along her inner thighs where he marked her with tiny little love bites. He let her legs slide from his shoulders and back to embracing his hips.


“Position two…” He breathed against her lips as he rubbed the tip of his cock between her hot, slippery folds. “Fishing for sirens.” He thrust into her sharply, groaning as he filled her with his cock. His eyes rolled back as he was engulfed in the sweetest, tightest pussy he had ever known. It was better than anything he had imagined when he thought about fucking her, soft, hot, wet and so fucking tight it was nearly painful. He stroked in and out of her for several moments, kissing her the entire time.

“No….don’t….” She protested when he withdrew, her legs tightening and her nails digging into his shoulders.

“Shhhh….calm down.” He soothed, arms wrapping tight around her waist as he headed back towards the steps leading out of the pool. “I’m not going anywhere and we have all night, remember?” He carried her to one of the poolside lounges and laid her back on the cushioned seat.

“Screw the bet, Draco….just fuck me.” She panted, pulling him towards her and spreading her legs wide.


“Oh I intend to, but I promised to prove you wrong and I just can’t pass up that opportunity.” He chuckled as he straddled the lounger and settled her thighs over his. “Though I have to say…” He grasped her hips and pulled her forward, using his thumb to push the head of his cock down to her opening. “You have the most incredible….” He thrust forward, embedding himself deeply inside her. “Pussy I have ever had….position three….” He grunted, holding her waist firmly as he pulled her over his cock again and again.

“Oh for the love of, Circe!” With every forward thrust of his hips he jerked her downwards, impaling her on his shaft. He continued this torturous motion for several minutes before finally withdrawing and sliding down on the lounger to replace his cock with his fingers and mouth.


“Position four.” He smirked up at her from between her legs and fastened his lips firmly around her clit, suckling at the little kernel as he slid his fingers inside her. He curled them up, his fingertips pressing into the upper wall of her vagina, stroking that small little patch of nerves until her back bowed and she screamed into the night like a banshee as she convulsed around his fingers and against his lips. He sat up, a rather smug grin on his lips as he gazed down at the naked, sweating woman panting in front of him. “Four positions and only one orgasm.”

“Mercy, Draco….” She groaned as aftershocks shuddered through her.

“Not tonight, love.” He said, getting to his feet and standing beside the lounger. She stared at his cock, so long and pink and bobbing in front of her. She could see the desire in his eyes and it just so happened that it was in line with her own so she sat up and scooted to the edge of the lounger. She grasped him firmly around the base quickly slid her lips over the weeping tip, suckling her way down his length. “Oh fuck yes!” He hissed, his hands tangling in her hair as she sucked him. She was a rather eager little witch, and talented too as she sucked, stroked and licked his cock like it was some tasty treat. He pulled her head back, his cock slipping free of her suctioning lips with a pop. “Enough, witch….that’s five.”

“You haven’t come yet.” She breathed, eager to have his cock back in her mouth.


“I’m not ready to come yet, besides, I can’t recover as quickly as you can.” He grinned. “I plan to make you come several times before I join you.” He took her by the hand and pulled her to her feet. “Gods I knew it was going to be good between us.” He growled before pulling her towards the house.

“Draco, I’m naked! You’re naked!” She squealed as he pulled her through a large set of glass French doors and into the house.


“This is my house.” He shrugged as though it was no big deal to walk naked and aroused through the house dragging his naked lover behind him.

“No, it’s your parent’s house!” She said, her eyes darting around nervously.

“And I told you, they sleep like the dead, don’t worry about it.” He stopped suddenly and gave her a wicked grin as he stepped into a doorway and leaned against the frame, sliding down a bit and bracing his feet on the other side. “Come here.” He pulled her to him and guided her so that she straddled him. He leaned her back so that the doorframe was between her shoulder blades and her hands were above her head clutching the dark, highly polished wood.

“What are you doing?” She whimpered as he clasped her hips and guided his cock into her once more.


“Number six.” He grinned, rocking gently into her and fingering her clit at the same time. She couldn’t believe she was actually doing such things with Draco but she couldn’t bring herself to be sorry, not when he felt so incredibly good inside her. They didn’t stay in the doorway long as it was an awkward position that prevented him from moving the way he wanted to, the way he needed to.

“Hold on to me.” He rasped, his hands curving over her bottom and lifting her into his arms. Her arms and legs came around him, holding tight as he carried her through the doorway and into the room without ever withdrawing from her body. A couple of candles flickered to life and she could see that they were in a study.


“Where are we?” She asked, groaning as he used his grip on her ass to stroke her over his cock.

“Father’s study.” He sat her down on a large desk and urged her to lay back. “Always wanted to fuck on the old man’s desk.” He grabbed her thighs and pushed them up to her chest. “Seven.” He groaned as he began to fuck her again with long, slow strokes, watching his cock disappear into her wet, red flesh again and again. “You are incredible.”

“Oh god….Draco….more…” She begged, clawing at the leather blotter beneath her.

“Fuck, I’m going to come…” He groaned, gripping her thighs hard as his strokes became harder. “Oh…shit…..yyyyeeeessssss!” He threw his head back as he pulsed inside her, filling her with his creamy seed. He slumped over her, his hands braced on the desk beside her head. “Brilliant….absolutely brilliant.” He panted, kissing her lips lightly.

“You are wicked.” She groaned when he slid out of her and she could feel the hot trickle of his slippery deposit. He cast a wandless cleansing spell over them and then helped her up, holding her close against him as they caught their breath.

“Damn, I just came and already I want to fuck you again.” He whispered in her ear.


“You need to clean off your father’s desk first.” She said, eyeing the wet spot marring the leather blotter.

“Not a chance in hell let the old man try and figure out what it is.” He chuckled, tilting her head back so he could kiss her thoroughly. He was already semi erect and pressing into her stomach before he broke the kiss and once more pulled her along behind him. The house was dark, thank goodness, as he pulled her from the corridor into a large, circular foyer with a grand staircase winding up onto a second floor. “Upstairs.” He said, nudging her forward. She climbed the steps nervously, sticking close the wall, certain that Lucius was going to pop out of the darkness at any moment to scare the hell out of her as she walked naked through his house. She wondered if the Malfoys ran a naked house and that was why Draco had no qualms about wandering about in the buff. She was suddenly bombarded with the image of Lucius wearing nothing but his deatheater mask and holding his cane waiting for her at the top of the stairs.

Draco watched her heart shaped ass shift deliciously as she climbed the stairs in front of him. He grabbed her hips and leaned forward, sinking his teeth into her fleshy backside. She stumbled, falling to her knees on the carpet runner. Draco saw a perfect opportunity and instead of helping her up he nudged her knees wider and knelt behind her, finding his way into her from behind.

She nearly shouted in surprise but he clapped his hand over her mouth to silence her as he bounced off of her bottom with quick, hard thrusts of his hips. He slammed into her hard, holding himself deep as he whispered in her ear “Eight” before pulling out and helping her to her feet. Her legs were like jelly as he helped her up the stairs and began walking her down a long, dark hallway.


Halfway down she found her self pressed face first against a door, his cock sliding into her again and his hand sliding down her belly to play with her clit.

“Don’t scream, Hermione…” He whispered, his cock digging into her with slow, sure pumps of his hips. He tweaked her clit and she shuddered, her nails curling against the wood. “You wouldn’t want to wake my father.” He lunged into her sharply and she had to bite her lip to stifle the yelp. “He’s asleep on the other side of the door…so unless you want him to join in for nine, I would be quiet.” He continued to ravish her against the door, toying with her clit until he felt her convulse around him, her pussy clamping down on his cock like a vise. She tightened her lips, only the tiniest little whimpers escaping as she came.

She went boneless on him and would have slid down the door but he caught her up in his arms and carried her the rest of the way to his bedchamber at the end of the hall. They had essentially fucked their way through the house yet he wasn’t nearly satisfied. He didn’t intend to give her a moments rest until he was thoroughly sated and had won their wager.

He toted his limp burden straight into the bathroom where he filled a large, sunken tub with hot, sudsy water and stepped into it, burden in tow. He settled in, reclining against the curved back as he settled her on his lap, her back resting against his chest. He began to rub her shoulders gently, his thumbs brushing along the back of her neck as she sighed, her head rolling to the side.

“You win…I concede.” She groaned. She heard him chuckle and felt his hands sliding forward over her breasts. Soapy, slick fingers tugged at her nipples and she felt a surprising pulse of arousal between her thighs.

“It’s not going to be that easy, Love; it’s a matter of pride now.” He whispered, his hands sliding down to adjust her thighs so they were on the outside of his. “Ten.” He whispered as he adjusted himself and penetrated her.

“You are killing me.” She moaned, gripping the edge of the tub as he thrust up slowly.

“It’s about time; I’ve been trying since third year.” He groaned. “Turn around….ride me.” He helped her shift in the water until she was straddling him face to face and lowering herself onto his erection. “That’s right….just like that.” He said, holding her hips and guiding her over him in slow, fluid undulations that had his head buzzing. “Oh gods….Granger…..eleven is the best yet…” He groaned leaning forward to capture one shimmying breast’s tip between his lips.

He sucked her nipples until they were dark, wet and painfully erect while she rode him. Water sloshed over the side of the tub onto the floor but he didn’t give a damn about that, he just wanted to keep fucking the witch in his lap until he couldn’t move. He pulled her from the tub and dragged her into his bed. He shoved the pillows and blankets onto the floor and laid back, pulling her over him so that she was straddling his face while he licked and sucked at her flesh.


“Twelve.” He growled against clit before slapping her ass and directing her to turn around so she could suck him while he worshipped the altar between her thighs. “Thirteen”. He arched his hips, pushing his cock deeper between her lips, loving how she sucked on him like she was trying to drink through a straw. When he licked at the puckered rosette of her anus she sucked him deep into her throat and actually shouted in surprise, his orgasm torn from him without warning as he poured his release into her throat. She choked slightly, but swallowed him down, easing her ministrations and coming off of him slowly. She rolled onto her back, gasping for air as she stared up at the ceiling of his room.

He rolled onto his side and pulled her up against him, using the time he needed to recover to fondle every inch of her body. He never seemed to soften completely, despite having come twice already. Lying on his side behind her he told her to bend her top leg and pull her knee up to her chest, when she did he slid his semi erect penis back into her swollen flesh. ‘Fourteen’. He rolled her over to face him, draping her thigh over his hip, fucking her face to face. ‘Fifteen’.

He pulled her up onto her hands and knees and pounded into her from behind, her hair gathered up in one of his hands as he rode her hard. ‘Sixteen’. He was on his knees with her draped over his lap, her shoulders the only part of her touching the bed as he ploughed into her fiercely. ‘Seventeen’. He pulled her legs over his shoulders, bending her nearly in half as his hips rose and fell against hers. ‘Eighteen’

Sweaty and in need of a recharge he carried her back into the bathroom where he fucked her in the shower, kneeling on the shower floor with her back pressed up against the wall, his elbows hooked beneath her knees. ‘nineteen’

He opened his bedroom window and sat her on the ledge while he knelt in front of her and licked her to orgasm while she held on to the window frame and his hair for dear life. ‘twenty’


He laid her on his bed, standing in front of her. With her legs pressed together and straight up in the air he slid into her, the position making her even tighter than normal. ‘twenty one’

He had her on her knees, gripping the headboard, her nipples brushing against the wood as he took her hard and fast from behind, the headboard rocking into the wall with every pounding thrust. ‘twenty two’

They laid side by side, sweaty, exhausted and sore as the birds began to chirp and the sun began creeping over the horizon.

“Sunrise.” She whispered hoarsely, her throat raw from a night spent screaming in pleasure. Draco rolled on top of her and took her mouth with his as he settled between her legs, slipping into her softness yet again.


“Twenty three.” He whispered, moving slowly, carefully, knowing she had to be sore after the way he had used her body the night before.

“You win.” She sighed, her hands sliding down his back to curve over his flexing backside. “It’s more than possible….oh god….to achieve…..right there……..twenty three positions…..Draco….positions in a ….yes…one night stand….I’m coming!” She arched into him, her body sucking greedily at his as he thrust harder, faster until he was coming inside her with a groan. He shuddered, his cock and balls aching from loving her all night, his back beginning to protest all the activity.

“Just one problem with that, Love.” He said, rolling onto his back and pulling her into his arms.


“What’s that?” She asked sleepily as he accio’d the blankets and pillows back onto the bed.

“This wasn’t a one night stand.” He said, covering her up with the blanket and tucking a pillow beneath his head.


“It wasn’t?” She snuggled up against him, her fingers toying with the thin patch of hair in the center of his chest.

“No….I’m crazy about you, Granger.” He whispered, kissing her brow.

“You’re crazy period, Draco.” She said, smiling as draped her thigh over his hips and cuddled closer. “But I happen to be rather fond of crazy.”

As the sun rose over the horizon Draco and Hermione fell into a much needed slumber wrapped in each others arms.




~@~

FORGIVE ME PLEASE!!!!!!! Im sorry…I know…its straight porn! Its depraved….but I couldn’t help it……it was for a friend……hahahaha!!!!!!






GET OFF by PRINCE

How can I put this in a way so as not to offend or unnerve
There's a rumor goin' all round that you ain’t been gettin' served
They say that you ain’t you know what
In baby who knows how long
It's hard for me to say what's right
When all I wanna do is wrong

Get off - 23 positions in a one night stand
Get off - I'll only call you after if you say I can
Get off - let a woman be a woman and a man be a man
Get off - if you want to baby here I am (Here I am)

I clocked the jizz from a friend
Of yours named Vanessa Bet (Bet)
She said you told her a fantasy
That got her all wet (Wet)
Something about a little box with a
Mirror and a tongue inside
What she told me then got me so hot
I knew that we could slide

Get off - 23 positions in a one night stand
Get off - I'll only call you after if you say I can
Get off - let a woman be a woman and a man be a man
Get off - if you want to baby here I am (Here I am)

Get off (Get off)

1 2 3 - Nah, little cutie, I ain't drinkin' (Get off)
Scope this, I was just thinkin'
You + me, what a ride
If you was thinkin' the same
We could continue outside (Get off)
Lay your pretty body against the parkin' meter
Strip your dress down
Like I was strippin' a Peter Paul's Almond Joy
Lemme show you baby I'm a talented boy

Everybody grab a body
Pump it like you want somebody

Get off (Get off)

So here we-so here we-so here we are, here we are (G-G-Get off)
In my paisley crib
Whatcha want to eat? "Ribs"
Ha, toy, I don't serve ribs...
You better be happy that dress is still on
I heard the rip when you sat down

Honey them hips is gone
That's alright, I clock 'em that way
Remind me of something James used to say...

"I like 'em fat"
"I like 'em proud"
"Ya gotta have a mother for me"
Now move your big ass 'round this way
So I can work on that zipper, baby
Tonight you’re a star
And I'm the big dipper

(Kick it)

(Get off)

(Get off)

How can I put this in a way so as not to offend or unnerve (Get off)
There's a rumor goin' all round that you ain’t been gettin' served (Get off)
They say that you ain’t you know what
In baby who knows how long (Get off)
It's hard for me to say what's right
When all I wanna do is wrong

Get off - 23 positions in a one night stand
Get off - I'll only call you after if you say I can
Get off - let a woman be a woman and a man be a man
Get off - if you want to baby here I am

Come on

Get off
Get off
Get off
Get off
Get off
Get off
Get off
Get off