Stay

A/N: If you haven't listened to the song Stay by Sugarland (though I imagine most have) go listen to it. You'll see that I borrowed some lines from it simply because I could say it as wonderfully as the writer of the song could. I'm not sure I like this one but here ya go.

Stay

I squeezed my eyes closed as he rolls off of me, his breath coming in pants as he settles himself next to me.

I dare a glance at him and have an almost undeniable urge to slap him when I see his hands behind his head, a smirk of satisfaction on his confidence filled faced.

Doesn't he know what this does to me? Doesn't he know that even though he treats me worst than trash that I still secretly pray she won't call him. But she will. She always does. And he'll leave, like he always does.


It's not fair! She'll never love him like I do! It's simply not possible. I'll be the first to admit that I don't know a lot about love, but what I do know is that another human being has never loved anyone more than I love him.


I reach a hand out to grab his when I hear it, that damned fated ring. Fuck!


He moves to the edge of the bed, reaching for his cell phone as tears to fill eyes.


I curse loudly as I wipe at them furiously and he turns to glare at me, a finger barely touching his impossibly soft, kissable lips.


'Fuck you' I mouth and he smirks, 'you already did' he mouths back and I scowl before getting out of bed, reaching for my pants as he finishes up with his wife.


"What the bloody hell is the matter with you?" his arms encircle my waist and my deceitful body shivers at the touch.


"You almost blew it." he whispers against my ear, his tongue coming out to flick the lobe back and forth playfully.


"And I'd much rather you blow me than my cover." he laughs as if it were the funniest joke in the world.


"You're an asshole." I spit before storming into the adjoining bathroom. How dare he! This isn't some sick joke! This is my life! My fucking life.


I lean against the door as he yells for me to come out. I don't want to face him. I don't want to face the reality that he won't choose me. I've thought about giving him an ultimatum a million times but I know, I know he'd pick her. And I couldn't handle that.


"Fine! Be a fucking prick, I'm outta here." he yelled and white hot anger explodes behind my eyes and my head starts to spin, I grab the sink to balance myself, reaching for the door knob with one hand.


I stumble out of the room, feeling sick to my stomach and I look at him, tears now falling freely down my face.


"Isn't that what you're going to do anyway?" I whisper, my voice catching and I curse my lack of self control.


His eyes soften and I grab my stomach, oh Jesus please don't let me throw up now. Pity. He pities me. God I hate life. I don't want his pity, or his sympathy. I want his love, but I know I'll never get it. That part of him is already taken.


"Draco," he takes a step towards me, his arm outstretched. I can hear his despair and frustration and I know exactly what he'll say. It's always the same. He'll tell me it's really me he wants to be with, that he's just staying for his kids. He'll kiss me and tell me as soon as his oldest is at Hogwarts he'll leave her. And I'll believe him, like I always do. Well, not this time.


"Don't." I croak, putting my hand out to stop him, because damnit I'll believe him.


"I can't do this anymore." I can tell by looking at him that he doesn't believe me. He just think I'm being dramatic, that he'll be able to charm his way out of it.


"Draco-"


"What do I have to do to make you see she can't love you like me?" I look into those emerald eyes, begging him not to go.


He takes a step towards me and this time I don't stop him. My throat feels like it's closing and my heart is pounding so hard I'm sure my chest will explode any second.


"I'll get on my knees if that's what it take Harry, just please, please stay." I'm sobbing now, doubling over as my stomach starts to cramp, I'm going to be sick.


"Draco," Harry mumbled, his velvet smooth voice calming me, his strong arms wrapped tight around me, and in that instant I feel safe, like nothing and no one can touch me. But of course the feeling doesn't last, it never does.


"Why don't you stay?" I ask, pleading that for once he'll say yes.


I feel him tense and I know what'll he'll say, "I can't."


"Don't I give you what you need?"


"God Draco, yes." his hand runs through my hair and I sigh, feeling relaxed again.


"You know I love you Draco, but it's not that simple." he whispered, pulling me closer.


"We don't have to live this way Harry, please just stay."


My pride yells for me to stop talking, to stop begging like some wanton whore but I can't! I love him, I love him so much. Is it so much to want the man you love all to yourself? Is it too much to ask for to be happy? It's all I want, he's all I want, all I've ever wanted.


"I've given you my best, why does she get the best of you?"


"There will come a time when I'll leave her arms and forever be in yours, I promise."


How can he say that? Why does he lie to me? We both know that'll never happen. I can't do this anymore, I can't.


I pull back, looking him in the eye, gathering every ounce of courage I have for what I'm have to do.


"Well I don't think that's the truth and I don't like being used and I'm tired of waiting." I take a step back, distancing myself from him. "It's too much pain to have to bare to love man you have to share."


He looks stunned, and honestly I don't blame him, I know he never thought this day would come, hell I didn't think this day would come but it did and I surprisingly feel liberated. I'm free, I don't have to put myself through this blissful torture anymore. I can't waste another minute after all that I've put in it.


"So the next time you find you want to leave her bed for mine, why don't you stay. I'm up off my knees, I'm so tired of being lonely, you can't give me what I need. When she begs you not to go, there is one thing you should know, I don't have to live this way baby why don't you stay."


I stare into his emerald eyes as I slowly approach his frozen figure.


I press my lips to his, closing my eyes as I feel his luscious lips pressed against mine, his body moving closer.


I force myself to pull back as a fresh batch of tears start to fall. I take a deep breath, reminding myself that I deserve better, that all the love in the world won't make Harry mine. He'll never make me happy and I'll never be enough for him.


"Goodbye Harry," I whisper sadly as I turn and stalk across the room, my feet feeling like a ton of bricks, each step getting harder to take as my heart slowly but surely crumbles.


I turn to take one more look at him, his stony eyes staring at me, his mouth pursed like he has something to say but words have failed him. I smile sadly as I closed the door, leaving him for once to stand alone, with his heart on his sleeve, feeling like he's dying.