Better Than Me

Looking around the empty bedroom he felt his heart clinch. Walking through the apartment he noted how barren it looked without him. Even the atmosphere seemed chillier as there were no stray giggles and soft sighs. He resigned himself to a life without him. After all he’d been right, he could do much better than him.

He told himself the he would miss him but as it appeared he’d lied to no one but himself. He thought back to the days where they were happy. He could remember what if felt like beside him, when they were in the car, or on the sofa watching a movie. Or even when he lay beside him in bed. He always felt special, loved. He remembered the smell of his hair when he leaned over him to whisper in his ear when they were lying down enjoying each other’s company. But that was then, he knew that he deserved much better then him.

He’d lied to him but he knew that it was for his own good. He was holding him back and while he pretended to be happy, he knew he wasn’t. He sat on the floor of the bedroom and looked through the box where he stored his old love notes. He found pictures from all the outing they’d had. One memory that he didn’t want to forget, that no picture could document was the time at the mall. Them in the dressing room, with other shoppers passing just outside the door. As he read through the notes, he remembered the hard time he had making him believe his lies. He never loved anyone but him, and the guilt started to kick in. Again he knew that dwelling on the past would do nothing for him. As it was he knew that he could do much better then him.

He sat absorbed in his thoughts, reminiscing about years passed. The ringing of a phone pulled him out of his memories. Rising he answered. The voice on the other end sounded so sweet, but he couldn’t give into the pleading.

“Harry. I think you should know this. You deserve much better than me.” Saying what he had to, he hung up.