These are the Moments of Our Lives

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The biggest shock of young Scorpius Abraxas Malfoy school life was when the Sorting Hat told the great hall “SLYTHERIN” while resting on Albus Potter’s messing hair.

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The first meeting between Albus Severus Potter and Scorpius Abraxas Malfoy went a little something like this:

“What are you doing in my bed, Malfoy?” mumbled Albus, as he peered at the blond head sharing his pillow.
A soft snore was the only reply.

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Even when Scorpius was picking on Hugo the Hufflepuff, and Albus NEVER WANTED TO SEE HIS UGLY MUG AGAIN, Scorpius was still in Albus’s bed in the morning.

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And even when Albus was being a prick and insulting Draco and Lucius and every Malfoy to ever exist, and Scorpius wished Albus would WALK DOWN TO THE LAKE AND FEED HIMSELF TO THE SQUID, Scorpius crawled into Albus’s bed a little bit after midnight.

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And when Scorpius fell from his broom in third year while playing Quidditch in the rain, Albus was asleep on the edge of the hospital wing bed Scorpius awoke in.

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The most frequent conversations they had were the ones where they tried to convince their roommates they were not lovers.

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The most damage ever inflicted on the castle in twenty years was a direct result of the healer keeping Scorpius out of the hospital wing in fourth year because Albus had dragonpox.

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Some of the best flying even seen at Hogwarts came the morning after Scorpius had slept into Albus’s bed instead of even attempting to sleep in his own.

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Some of the worst essays in the history of Hogwarts were handed in by five sixth year Slytherin boys, after the Slytherin Head of House forcibly restrained Albus Potter and Scorpius Malfoy in their own beds for a week.

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The cleanest cauldrons the Potions Lab has ever had were a result of the Sunday morning detention five sixth year Slytherin boys had after handing in the worst essays Hogwarts had ever seen.

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Some of the cruellest pranks in the world were aimed at a boy called Steven Write by five sixth year Slytherin boys when they found out he was the reason Albus and Scorpius had been restrained.

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While the Hogwarts’s Professors did not approve of the Potter boy and the Malfoy boy sharing a bed, they were wise enough to see the ramifications of them not sharing a bed, and kindly turned a blind eye.

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Let it be said Hogwarts Professor’s are not as stupid as they appear.

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Most of the Hogwarts staff was greatly relived when Albus and Scorpius graduated and took their strange sleeping habits with them.

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The biggest inconvenience in Scorpius’s life was that Albus still lived with his parents.

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The biggest beating Scorpius ever got was when he flooed into the Potter’s living room a little after midnight and was beaten with a broomstick by a sleepy Ginny Potter.

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The same broom was used to hit Harry Potter when he came home at four am because Ginny knew why he’d left her on the couch under a sleeping charm.

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The discovery that he loved Scorpius was really a huge shock, but it was probably the best moment in his life.

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The biggest denial of Scorpius Malfoy’s life is his love for Albus Severus Potter. Even though Scorpius was the one who proposed. Which went something along the lines of:

“It’s not that I love you, but I can’t have you getting married to anyone else because three in a bed is kind of cramped, so we’ll have to get married.” But he was on one knee and the ring was quite nice.

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The second biggest shock of Albus Severus Potter’s life came at the age of twenty when he sat his mother and father and brother down and told them he was in love with Scorpius Malfoy. And his mother muttered darkly ‘like father like son’.

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Scorpius reluctantly told his mother, father, grandmother and grandfather he would marry Albus Severus Potter in two weeks and there was nothing they could do to stop it, but they could come if really they had to. His mother congratulated him, his grandmother ‘was happy’ for him, his grandfather tried to smile but failed, and his father ran crying from the room.

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The biggest shock of either Scorpius or Albus Potter-Malfoy’s lives happened during the reception when they sneaked off to find a quiet cupboard to ‘be alone’ for a moment or twelve, only to find someone had gotten there before them.

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Harry and Draco flinched at the bright light that came through the now open door and clung to each other’s sweating naked bodies in fear.

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The noblest vow Scorpius ever made was after seeming what he and Albus would look like in twenty odd years if they were even to hide in a closet and have sex for the first time in … well a long time by the look of it. Scorpius vowed he would never let Albus suffer like that.

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Somehow Harry and Draco managed another round in the closet after their respective son’s closed the door and went away before their respective wives found them and dragged them out of the closet by their respective ears.

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The biggest pain Scorpius ever suffered was having his hand squeezed while Scorpius gave birth to Violet Guinevere Potter-Malfoy.

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Or so he thought until three days later when he gave birth to Adhara Pansy Potter-Malfoy.

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The biggest surprise of Narcissa Malfoy’s life was holding her great granddaughters in her arms.

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The stupidest fight Scorpius and Albus ever had was when Violet grew a beautiful head of red hair.

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The first night Albus slept on the couch was when Scorpius accused him of sleeping with someone with red hair.

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The first night Scorpius slept on the couch was when he accused Albus of sleeping with a redheaded person and Albus refused to sleep in their bed.

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One of the happiest moments for Scorpius and Albus was when Violet and Adhara boarded the train to Hogwarts. Because now they could have sex anywhere they wanted without having to pause mid coitus to cast a memory spell on a peeping girl child.

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The happiest moments in Scorpius and Albus’s lives were at Christmas when the whole family would arrive at the manor. Both Albus and Scorpius made it their business to make sure everyone was as happy as they were, if only for a few days.

This included:

Getting their respective mothers drunk, so their respective fathers could sneak off to a hidden broom closet,

Making sure Lucius had enough port to keep him unaware of the silencing spell preventing him from insulting the other members of the family,

Having enough wool for Molly to knit ugly Weasley sweaters for all her children, grandchildren, cousins, in-laws, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephew, and whomever else she wanted to knit for,

Hiring serving staff so Hermione wouldn’t have to see the multitude of House Elves enslaved in the Manor,

Placing several children and George Weasley under the Imperious as soon as they crossed the threshold to prevent any fire, flood, earthquakes, or people turning into chickens,

Ensuring the older children had rooms on the ground floor so they could sneak in and out in the middle of the night,

Purchasing enough gifts for the younger children to keep the family knee deep in wrapping paper for three days,

And having enough alcohol to keep everyone else vaguely unaware of their surrounding and in a semi-permanent state of bliss.

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But all and all even Scorpius couldn't deny, the best moments were when they crawled into their bed at the end of the day ... and slept

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^^;;