The Choices We Make

He met her in a seedy London pub, far away from the prying eyes of her fiancée and his friends, one of whom happened to be his brother. No one noticed him when he had arrived over forty-five minutes ago, and when he had ordered a Firewhisky, the barkeeper hadn’t even glanced up to see who he was serving.

He found a table in a dark corner where he sat nursing his drink, waiting for her to arrive. At first, he wondered whether she would bother to show up, and as the minutes ticked by, he wondered whether or not she would be able to get away from everyone to meet him.

The need for secrecy was overwhelming, as no one had ever known they had been friends in school. They had kept their friendship secret, ever since the first year they had bonded over a cauldron in the Potions classroom. It had never been acceptable for a Slytherin to befriend a Gryffindor, but they had ignored the unspoken rule.

He had never expected to fall in love with her, but it had happened, no matter how hard he tried to deny it. He knew it was an unrequited love, especially when she had spent most of their seventh year with his brother and his best friend. He had watched from afar while she fell in love with Potter, a boy she had seemed to hate ever since their first day of school.

Now, she was marrying the arrogant bastard. When Regulus had seen his brother earlier today, Sirius had casually mentioned that he would be attending their engagement party tomorrow evening. Regulus knew then that he had to see her, to make sure this was really what she wanted.

He knew the moment she walked in the door of the pub. Conversations at other tables stopped dead and everyone stared at the door. Obviously, the patrons of the bar were not used to seeing a beautiful woman enter their midst. She had tried to conceal her fiery auburn hair under the hood of the cloak she wore, but it had managed to poke its way out, adding to her beauty.

He could tell she knew everyone was staring at her. She looked around the room, and when she spotted him, their eyes locked onto one another. She immediately dropped her gaze and quickly made her way to his table.

“I didn’t think you would make it,” Regulus confessed.

Lily dropped down into the other grungy chair at the table, and he could tell she was uncomfortable being in an unfamiliar pub. “I wasn’t sure I was going to meet you,” Lily told him, running her fingers through her long red hair.

“Potter keeping you on a short leash?” he sneered.

Lily sighed heavily. “I don’t want to fight with you, Regulus, that’s not why I came here.”

“Why did you come here?” Regulus fired back, eager to find out what was going on in her head.

Snatching his glass of Firewhisky, Regulus was amazed when she tipped her head back, taking a sip of the burning liquid. He had never seen her drink an ounce of liquor, and judging from the harsh reaction on her face, she wasn’t all that accustomed to it either.

He could see her hands trembling as she dropped the glass back on the heavy oak table, and he noticed the way she glanced around the room, making sure they weren’t being watched.

“Why did you meet me here tonight, Lily?” Regulus asked again, desperate to find out the answer, hoping it would be the one he wanted to hear.

“You were my friend once,” Lily said hesitantly, knowing Regulus wouldn’t like her answer.

Regulus looked shocked as he tried to speak. Trying not to shout, he hissed, “I was your friend?”

“Regulus, please,” Lily begged, not wishing to cause a scene in such an undesirable location.

“Obviously being with Potter has changed you. The Lily Evans I knew in school is dead,” he proclaimed before throwing some spare change on the table and storming towards the door.

The rain poured down on him as soon as he exited the pub. It was ironic to Regulus that the weather reflected his mood so completely. His heart was breaking in two after her confession. He had held Lily on a pedestal since that first conversation he had with her back in his first year at Hogwarts.

“Regulus,” he heard her call through the rain.

As much as he ached to turn around, to see her one last time, his pride was too wounded already. He kept walking, ignoring her, hoping she would just walk away.

“Regulus, wait,” she called, catching up to him in the dark alley, the rain pouring down over them. “Please don’t walk away from me,” she told him as she stepped in front of him, blocking his path.

“I won’t be made a fool of,” he said, his throat burning with hurt or anger, he wasn’t sure which.

“I wasn’t trying to make a fool of you, Regulus, and I didn’t come here tonight out of pity. I wanted to see you. It’s been so long since I’ve seen you.”

“You should get home to your fiancée,” he said, ignoring her confession.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Reg. I’ve never meant to hurt you.”

“It doesn’t matter,” he shouted as he pushed away from her. Calling over his shoulder, he stated, “Nothing matters anymore, Lily. Our destiny was written before we even met. It was always going to be this way. We thought we could change it, but we obviously couldn’t.”

“That’s not true,” Lily responded. “We did change everything.”

Swinging back around, Regulus wasn’t sure whether it was the rain running down his face, or the tears pouring from his eyes that were blurring his vision. “We were supposed to change the world! We vowed that we would do it together. We vowed we would stay together forever and nothing would ever separate us.”

Lily closed the gap in between them launching herself into the surprised man’s arms. She quickly brought her hands up to his face and grasped it, pulling his lips down to her own.

The kiss was passionate and hot, and was everything Regulus had always wanted since that one night in a dark classroom at the end of their sixth year. It had been that kiss that had gotten him through the summer, and it had been that one kiss that he had lived with since then, the kiss he couldn’t forget as he watched Lily fall in love with Potter and forget about him.

It was Regulus who broke the kiss, knowing that nothing would change, even if he allowed it to continue. “You’ve made your choice,” he said softly, pushing her away.

“As have you,” Lily responded, looking into his dark eyes. “I know what you’ve been doing, Regulus. I know where your loyalties now lie.”

Regulus was caught off guard when Lily reached for his arm, pulling up the sleeve of his jumper to see the mark that he was always so careful about hiding. Her eyes showed her surprise, almost as if she hadn’t really expected the Dark Mark to be there.

Snatching his arm back and pushing down his sleeve, Regulus spoke. “You’re right; we have both made our choices. After you made your choice, I made mine.”

Lily knew the comment was meant to make her feel guilty, but she was through feeling guilty, now that she had the proof Regulus was no longer the Regulus she had known in school. Part of her wanted to beg him to forsake the Dark Lord, but she knew there was no turning back for him now.

“We’ll never see each other again, will we?” she asked.

Regulus gave her one last hard look before turning his back to her and walking away, away from the woman he loved, knowing their choices they had made separately had pushed them apart forever.