They Don't Make Desks Like They Used To ...

AN: Hi everybody! I hope this meets the high standards I know everyone expects!! I apologise in advance for any spelling and such mistakes but I did my best to get rid of them all and I don't think that many remain but just in case some missed my meticulous inspection, I'm sorry!

Please read and review! You know you wanna!!

Enjoy!!

EDIT: Just put some indication as to what are thoughts and what are not as I can't figure out how you do italics on this thing!! I'd appreciate it if someone could tell me! I've just put single speech marks for thoughts and double for speaking.

EDIT2: A sequel is in the pipelines guys!! How about a little review with some of your ideas and I promise to include as many as I can!

EDIT3: The beginnings of a sequel have been published! I repeat; have been published! Yes, and I've aptly named it 'Sequel to 'They Dont Make Desks Like They Used To'' funnily enough! Hope you like it! (Now called 'The Truth'!)
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'That damn Gryffindor,'

Snape was in a particularly hateful mood, no change there...

'Always doing something to drive me insane, like I don't have enough problems with the order and that, damn Potter...'

At the moment, Harry was biting the knuckles on his left hand in a bored sort of way and letting Hermione do all the work. Ron was letting Hermione do all the work too, as well as staring at Harry in a I-can't-beleive-he's-doing-what-I-think-he's-doing sort of way. Not that Hermione objected to doing everything, she probably thought they would only mess it up anyway.

Snape watched those perfect teeth pull the tanned skin from his knuckle, rolling it between those pearly whites, then letting it snap back. The skin red from the amount of times he had already done it. Snape licked his lips and vaguely imagined those teeth grazing over his nipples as his mouth nibbled its way down and he felt them harden in response.

'Great. Now the ever-so-arrogant boy, no man, who lived is watching me...'

Harry licked at the red skin on his hand, then licked his lips enticingly before sucking the saliva off his hand, making the marks a deeper shade of pink.

Every potions lesson was the same, Harry would find new ways of attempting to seduce his most hated teacher, just for the thrill of the chase, stopping only when he knew that he could make anyone melt at his feet.

Harry began lazily stroking his own face, letting his fingers play across his skin and never losing eye contact with his teacher. Luckily, Harry, Ron and Hermione always took a table at the back of the room, so Harry's actions went unnoticed by the general majority of the class. Harry trailed his first and second fingers across his full and peachy lips then pushed the tips of them into his mouth and sucked lightly. Snape licked his lips, knowing exactly what the Gryffindor was doing but unable to stop himself. Harry took more of his fingers into his mouth and Snape's tretchorous mind began conjuring up the image of Harry on his knees before him, taking his whole cock in his mouth, sucking and growling in his throat.

Snape barely bit back a moan and his cock twitched when Harry pulled his fingers from his mouth and began licking the wetness from them, the saliva making slick ropes between the two digits.

'Bloody Potter, trying to make me hard, doing a damn good job too ... he doesn't know what he's getting himself into...'

The bell suddenly rang and Harry jumped slightly, he hadn't done any work at all and Snape wasn't about to miss an opertunity to give him a detention for that. He wasn't disappointed. Snape stalked over and peered down at Harry, still sitting in his seat.

"Ah, Potter, you seem to have no work to show for the two hours in which you've been here. Can it be that the almighty Potter has suddenly lost the shredded remains of his limited intellect?"

Draco Malfoy laughed apreciatively with Snape sneering. The rest of the class having already filed out. Ron had given Harry an apologetic look before leaving whilst Hermione mouthed something about the Library, pushing a reluctant Ron ahead of her.

"But this is not the matter of your divinity, Potter, you always did have an extremly slow mind..."

Whatever Snape had been expecting Harry to do in responce to his taunting, it was not what he did next.

'What the...'

Harry stood up and grabbed the Potions Master by his greasy locks and roughly crushed their lips together, Harry heard a sharp gasp of breath from Malfoy who had stayed behind for some reason or reasons unknown. At first, Snape tried to pull away but a Quidditch trained hand kept him in place.

"Sir?..." Malfoy asked but Snape wasn't listening and his mind was running around with it's y-fronts on fire. Metaphorically that is ...

'Oh. My. God. What the heck is he doing? This isn't right! I should be the controlling one around here, I'M the teacher!!'

Then hard reality came crashing down on him. Here he was, french-kissing a student,

'When did he push his tongue in my mouth?'

in front of another student, in HIS classroom. He would surely lose his job for this if it got out. Snape grasped Harry's wrist in a firm grip and ripped it from his hair and roughly pulled away from Harry's mouth. Gasping, he barely managed to say

"Potter ... Malfoy. Detention. Tonight. 8 0'clock. Do not be late!"

before collapsing in a heap in his chair after they had left, still panting like a dog in a hot car.

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Harry walked calmly out of the dungeons and, though he was still breathing heavily, he didn't look half as flustered as Malfoy did. His usually pale and pointed face had an adorable pink tinge to it and he was still breathing heavily from, what Harry assumed but it was hard to tell through his school robes, was a raging hard on. Smirking lightly to himself at Malfoy's uncomfortable and obviously embarrasing situation, he turned away from him, to go in the other direction, to the Great Hall to get something to eat, no doubt Ron and Hermione would be there and if not, they would be there when they had finished their visit to the library.

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When Harry arrived in the hall it was to see that Ron and Hermione were not there and after taking a quick sweep of the hall he also noted, not surprisingly, that neither was Malfoy. Harry sniggered.

'Probably taking care of something urgent that has 'come up'.'

Harry made his way over to the Gryffindor table and and sat down next to a shaking Neville. He hadn't gotten over potions yet and never did until at least the end of their next class, which meant that Harry was constantly having sticky things attacking him.

Today however was going surprisingly well. Harry only had to tolerate the bombardment of peas and the occasional pickled onion as Neville tried to stab at them instead of scooping. Just when another pea bounced of his glasses, Ron and Hermione appeared.

Ron flopped into the vacant chair next to Harry whilst Hermione sat on Ron's other side, she then launched into a rant about how the Librarian should catalogue her books more thouroughly for students, so they could find a book quicker. All through her lecture, Ron had been trying to catch Harry's eye as he ate, wanting to ask what the heck he was doing in Potions, but he purposefully avoivded it.

"What is with you two today?"

Hermione had finished her 'little' rant about the Librarian and her Library and was wondering why they were being so quiet instead of telling her to drop it as always. When she got nothing more than a grunted 'What?' from them both she chose to rephrase her question.

"What did Snape want after Potions?"

Harry grudgingly replied even though he didn't really want to participate.

"Um ... Oh, he ... Er ... Gave me detention ..."

Hermione gave him one of her looks that she must have patented. You know, one of the I-know-your-hiding-something-from-me-and-I'm-going-to-find-out-what-it-is-whether-you-tell-me-or-not looks.

"Why?"

Harry didn't have to think very hard to come up with an excuse that Hermione would believe.

"I didn't do any work."

"I told you that you should have done something but you don't listen to me, do you ..."

That was all it took to butt Harry out of the conversation and leave him to his thoughts.

'I can't believe I got a detention, again ... No, what I can't believe is that I kissed Snape! It wasn't meant to go that far! Now I have to see him in detention tonight and Malfoy too, alone! How am I going to get out of this? It was supposed to be a simple experiment to see if I could make myself irrisistable that's why I picked Snape, well, I say experiment but it was more of a 'I wonder if I could do that' moment ... Anyway, I'm pretty sure Ron's catching on so that means that Hermione's already five steps ahead ... I need to end this experiment type thing, and soon!'

Harry suddenly stopped that train of thought before he started panicing. All the had to do, he told himself, was make sure that Ron and Hermione don't find out about his experiment and that he doesn't try to seduce Snape in the detention. Easy? Yeah right.

"Hello? Harry? Are you there?"

Harry vaguely registered Ron's hand waving in front of his face and definatly noticed the friendly punch to his shoulder which dragged him out of his deep pools of thought.

"What?"

"The bell just went, we've got to go or we'll be late!"

And with that Hermione dragged them both out of the Great Hall for Defence Against the Dark Arts. As Harry stumbled up from his seat he noticed a still slightly flushed Draco get up from his seat and make his way to the door, which surprised him as he hadn't even seen him arrive. Both the Slytherins and the Gryffindors reached the door at the same time.

"Watch it Scarhead!"

Draco shouldered his way past Harry and when he turned to throw another scathing remark his eyes were drawn to Harry's crotch and a smirk appeared on his lips.

"Well, well, well,"

That swagger was back in his walk as he approched Harry and stopped when he stood just out of arms reach, looking Harry up and down, the arrogant smirk carefully arranged on his lips.

"Look, here guys! Scarhead has creamed his pants!! Looks like he shot off a load too!"

Harry cheeks burned with embarresment as he looked down and sure enough, right at the crotch of his trousers there was a great, wet, white stain.

"Harry, Harry!"

It was Neville running up behind them at the doorway.

"Harry, I meant to tell you before you left! I dropped some of IceCream on you by accident!"

"Thanks, Neville..." Harry almost growled, he had been too immersed in his own thoughts to notice Neville's accidents, they happened often enough, so he just ignored them, which was one of the reasons why he was in this predicament. The Slytherins were still guffawing over Draco's latest triumph over Harry, as Draco crossed his arms and smirked in front of them. They soon stopped however, when Harry grabbed Draco by the front of his robes, slammed him into a wall and bit back in retaliation.

"You wait Malfoy. As soon as you enter our detention, I'll get you back."

And with that he stalked off to the Gryffindor common room to find a clean pair of trousers or to wash off the IceCream before he got any more comments of that nature.