Too Beautiful For You

Chapter One

Remus Lupin frowned, lowering his pale blue eyes as Sirius Black's own, brilliantly azure and sparkling, bore into him.

Don't look at me that way...

He had been avoiding his best friend's gaze all evening. Actually, make that all week. No, to be brutally honest, he had been trying to keep from directly meeting eyes with Black for years. He had of course failed miserably. Something in that penetrating stare quickened him and sent white hot thunderbolts of electrical emotion straight through his heart and even straighter through his groin, and whether he wanted it to or not never entered into the equation. It was just one of those things that was.

Black did it for him, end of story.

He'd never tell him, of course. One just didn't do that sort of thing...it was bad enough to feel this way, it would be worse to let anyone know. Especially Sirius.

God, if he knew...

Remus would never hear the end of it, ever. The suggestive remarks, the tongue-in-cheek ribbing, it would never end. Sirius, much as Remus loved him, could be such an ass.

The meeting was in full swing, the Order taking care of business as usual. Lupin was quiet as always, speaking when needed, sitting in silent contemplation the rest of the time, slyly watching Sirius out of the corner of his eye as he argued with Molly Weasley or stormed around the room exclaiming against Dumbledore's latest morsel of cockeyed wisdom. The man was a dynamo, always moving, full of life and vigor and---

damn him

---sexy energy.

The women noticed it, of course. Even Molly, frumpy and very married though she was, wasn't immune to the charm and animalistic sensuality of Sirius Black. Remus glanced around the room, not daring to raise his head lest Sirius' attention be turned back to him and those eyes rip into his soul again, laying him bare, reading the hidden secrets of his heart.

I love your eyes, deep and blue as the ocean on a cloudy day, I love the curve of your mouth when you just begin to smile, I love the way your hair blows across your face when you step outside...

Shit.

Sirius was looking at him.

Remus scrambled to recall what had just been said and embarrassingly made a halfassed response that all but screamed Sorry, I nodded off for a moment. The rest of the Order stared blankly at him, trying to connect what he'd just said to the subject at hand.

Kingsley Shacklebolt saved him by asking where all the biscuits had gone to.

Remus sighed his relief, sitting up straight and raking his fingers through his hair to get his mind back where it belonged. This was important stuff, he'd better pay attention---what if the war started tomorrow and he'd missed the who/what/where/when/how of it by fantasizing about Black? That would get him far once the curses started flying.

An Avada Kedavra right in the head is how far that would get me.

He looked up and almost physically recoiled in horror. Sirius was staring at him, his expression quizzical, the corner of his mouth turned up in a wry little questioning grin that said WHAT in the hell are you thinking?

Oh god. Please please PLEASE don't look at me like that. Do you know how much I adore the way your mouth hitches up at the corner when you're amused? Do you have any idea what it does to me when your eyes sparkle like that? Do you??

The meeting ended none too soon; the members of the Order went home, some paired up, some alone. Nymphadora Tonks did her usual brazen hinting that she'd like to accompany Remus to his cottage, but he politely rebuffed her, as always.

Sirius caught up to him at the door, grabbing him by the elbow.

Please don't...even your innocent touch ignites a fire in me that threatens to burn down my self control and set ablaze instincts that are better left to smoulder...

"Where are you off to in such a hurry?"

Remus flinched inwardly; Sirius' voice could do that to him so easily. Silky and warm, it caressed him comfortingly, so comfortingly he wanted to swim in it by moonlight and let it slowly dry on his skin in the night breeze.

"Oh, you know...big pressing social engagement. Bath, book, bed, as usual."

He cringed inwardly at what he'd just said. Sirius was sure to have fun with THAT collection of words.

He tried to avoid Black's eyes, god knows he tried. But that stare...Sirius could drag a person's eyes to his just by looking at them, and Remus was the least immune to his power. He sheepishly raised his own eyes to meet the stare.

"Bath, book, and bed eh?" The silky way he said it...especially bed...Remus felt himself beginning to flush, his cheeks getting hot. He wasn't gay, so WHY in the name of Merlin and all things holy or otherwise was he getting so bothered by his best friend??

Sirius was standing close to him, his hand absently holding the sleeve of Remus' cloak.

Can he tell? Does he know?

Tonks squeezed past them, brushing none too lightly against Lupin's arm as she said her goodbyes and exited, a long, lingering, and very suggestive glance cast at Remus as she did so.

Remus pretended not to catch it and prayed for Sirius to do the same.

No such luck.

The light danced in Black's eyes, all naughtiness and mischief as he urged Remus to go after her.

"She wants you, old friend!" he hissed under his breath, giving him a push, his hands on Remus' back. Even through his heavy cloak and the cardigan he wore under it, Remus could feel the heat from Sirius' palms burning into his skin. The man had always had the hottest hands.

Pleeeeeeease don't touch me he whined inwardly...even with layers of clothing between us, it still gives me shivers.

He turned, refusing to be shoved out the door after the pink-haired girl who was glancing back longingly in his direction. She was pretending to be preparing for apparition. Sirius cocked one eyebrow and looked at Remus again.

"That's an invitation, you old weredog."

"One I'm not interested in, mangy cur."

There was a loud *pop* and Tonks vanished. Maybe she had heard him, maybe she hadn't...Remus didn't particularly care, though the more sensitive side of his nature would dictate that he find her tomorrow and apologize. But at the moment, more pressing matters were at hand. Sirius was still touching him, his hand resting on Remus' shoulder, where it was threatening to burn a hole straight through to the skin and set Lupin into a total conflagration. He could see himself as a pile of smouldering ash with a conversation bubble above it, the words "I love you Sirius" scribbled in cartoon scrawl. The next panel would show a scruffy black dog hiking its leg and pissing on him to put the embers out.

That's what I need...I nice cold shower. Now.

"May I go now, or do you need me for some other pressing matter?"

Gah. Too much there for Sirius to play with...why can't I ever THINK about what I'm saying when I'm around him??

"Actually I'm bored and was hoping you'd stick around for a little wizard poker and some libations."

Too much THERE for REMUS to play with. He shuddered inwardly at the words wizard poker, but the promise of libations was, at least, promising.

But what if I get drunk, profess my undying love, pass out, and wake up petrified in the middle of Charing Cross Road with a DEVIANT sign around my neck?

Better rethink those libations.

"Come on Professor, I can tell you've got things you need to get off your chest before you burst."

Burst. Yes, that was a good word, and quite appropriate...Remus looked remorsefully downward as Sirius turned away from him, willing his nether regions to remain at ease, wondering if stirrings down there made him a pervert. He liked women, really he did, always had in fact...but something about his best and dearest lifelong friend just...got to him...

"Come Remus," Sirius called from the kitchen, his warm, playful voice setting the tiny hairs at the back of Remus' neck on end. "Let's have a drink and a chat, like old times." He heard the clink of glasses being set on the table.

Old times. Remus sighed, resigning himself to a fate of goodnatured jibes and an evening of ribald and rowdy storytelling from the famed, fabled, oft-fantasized-about Master Black.

God help me he muttered to himself, slumping off to the kitchen like a penitent child who knows he's about to be punished...the only problem was, he liked the sound of it.


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