Without You
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
1
Views:
935
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
1
Views:
935
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Without You
A/N: Without You is one of the most heart wrenching songs in Rent. I did the film version song because sadly, (even though I’m a huge Renthead) I’ve never seen it live. *ducks rotten fruit that flies at head*. So Here is my “tragedy” of this song with everyone’s favourite ship, Harry and Draco.
Without You,
The Ground Thaws,
The Rain Falls,
The Grass Grows.
I wake, the bed is oddly cold. It’s been like that for almost a week now. He left me. On the last day of winter, the man I thought—no, knew I’d love forever just up and left. He wasn’t happy, I was smothering, I wasn’t what he needed. I’m not what he wants. I have to tear myself from the huge bed made for two, the one that just seems too sad for one person, and wrap myself in the sheets that still smell of him to walk over to the balcony doors and step outside. The snow is almost gone. It’s raining, but I don’t really notice. I throw the sheets back into the warm room to prevent the scent from being lost and flop down into one of the chairs we had shared so many memories in, just feeling the raindrops hit my naked body and it feels so good on my closed eyelids.
Without You,
The Seeds Root,
The Flowers Bloom,
The Children Play,
I reopen my eyes when I hear the squeal of a child. No, it must have been my imagination—living alone in the far country can do that to you. I sigh and remember our plans to have children. Not soon, but eventually. I see the pot of dirt that last summer held colourful blooms of all shapes and sizes—He loved to garden. A few small green sprouts are starting to push through.
The Stars Gleam,
The Eagles Fly,
Without You,
The sun is setting. How long have I been out here, I wonder. All day, but the broken heart is something that can not be rushed into healing. I see a faint star and wish with all my fading heart that he will come back to me. He was my star, my rock, my strength, my hope, my lover, my…everything. God, why did he have to be such a pompous asshole?
The Earth Turns,
The Sun Burns,
But I Die,
Without You.
I feel like I’m fading, lying on the floor of the balcony. The sun is up again and blinding me, but I’m still out here. I must be dehydrated because my skin is burning steadily to a crisp but I can’t seem to move. I need help, I call out, but no one comes. Why did he do this?
Without You
The Breeze Warms
The Girls Smile
The Cloud Moves
I’m back in bed. How did that happen? The sheets are fresh. One of the house elves must have changed them. The balcony doors are open and an unusually warm March breeze blows through my bedroom. I can see the clouds drifting by in the sky. I wish I was one of them, able to move on without effort.
Without You
The Tides Change
The Oceans Crash
I think I can hear the ocean from my bed. The house elves have brought me lunch, but I don’t want it. I just drink the tea they’ve made for me to not dehydrate again. But even that seems like a chore. I miss him. Where is he?
The Crowd Roars
The Days Soar
The Babies Cry
Without You
It’s been another week. I somehow managed to get dressed and walk to the park. Why do I do this to myself? All I see is happy people everywhere. People kissing, people cuddling, people with their giggling children. All of this could have been mine! It should have been!
The Moon Glows
The River Flows
But I Die
Without You
I’m lying on the riverbank in the park now. I can hear the water rushing on past me like so many of my friends have. He was the only one to see and know the real me. And he’s gone. I feel like I’m dying, but no, death would have been easier.
The World Revives,
Colors Renew,
But I Know Blue,
Only Blue,
Lonely Blue,
Within Me, Blue,
Without You.
I stupidly go to your house to see you. I need you back. I can’t live without you. I need to feel your touch, share the same breath, and be mine, only mine.
Without You
The Hand Gropes
The Ear Hears
The Pulse Beats
You’re not home…or so the house elf says before slamming the door in my face. I claw and beat at the door for…I’m not sure how long. I finally wear myself out and just slump over onto the welcome mat and lean against the door. Tears finally start to stream down my face. All I can hear is the blood pounding through my ears and my shallow breathing. I cry until I can’t anymore, and fall asleep on your door step.
***
Without You
The Eyes Gaze
The Legs Walk
The Lungs Breathe
He made me betray you. How the hell Ron slipped me that Imperious potion I’ll never know, but when I find him again he will wish for death before he ever thinks of doing such a thing again. I need you back in my arms. I need to feel your lips on mine, and I need you in my arms when I sleep. I know I’ve fucked up big time, but it wasn’t me! I decide to apparate away from my house and into the village near your manor. I see a flower cart along the way and buy the biggest bouquet of the most fragrant and reddest roses I’ve ever seen. I practically run to your gates, only to be informed by the house elf that you’ve been gone for almost 3 days, and the last time they saw you, you were headed to the park. Fuck again.
The Mind Churns
The Heart Yearns
The Tears Dry
Without You
I run through the park yelling for you, screaming until I can barely speak anymore. I finally just flop down on a bench after searching the whole park and start to cry. I don’t care who sees me, the savior of the whole fucking wizarding world bawling my eyes out. Let them stare, I’m used to it. When I can’t cry anymore, when I feel the tears dry, I decide to see if you came back to the manor yet—the place that used to be our home. Once again the house elf says you are away. I walk for about two hours, until I realize I’m lost and apparate home.
Life Goes On
But I'm Gone
Cause I Die
As I walk up the front path I realize that by some trick of fate you’re asleep on my front mat. I run up to you and fall to my knees desperate to touch you. I don’t want to wake you; you look so peaceful, but I can see the bags under your eyes. Instead I lift you carefully and carry you into my room, then crawl into bed with you, pulling you as close as humanly possible.
Without You
***
Without You
I have a dream that I’m in your arms, so warm and safe…please God, please; let it be real this time…
***
Without You
The sun is in my eyes, and when I try to roll over I realize that there’s someone else in my bed. But this isn’t my bed, it’s Harry’s. How the hell did this happen? Harry is still asleep, clinging to my body in a desperate way. I wake him.
“Harry? Wake up. How the hell did I get here?”
“Draco! I…oh, my god, I missedyou andRonputmeonaninfluencepotioncushestillhatesyou, andwantedtobreakusup, andIloveyouandneverwantedanyofthistohappen, andpleaseforgivemeit’llneverhappeneveragainand…IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou…”
“Woah…slow down, use some sentence structure, for fuck’s sake. Start from the beginning, please. Why did you leave? I was so hurt, you bastard, don’t you realize that? I didn’t leave the house for more than two weeks! You have some explaining to do Potter, coherent explaining!” Yes, I had reverted to last names.
“I went to lunch with Ron, you remember? Well he must have slipped me something because the next thing I know I think it’s a great idea to leave you and move back into my house. I was convinced of this until yesterday when I woke up and found that I was here instead of with you. And I can’t live without you Draco, and you know it. I can’t believe I was stupid enough to let Ron drug me like that and hurt us both so badly…please forgive me, I can’t go on without you.”
“I missed you too, Harry. Isn’t that obvious? I slept on your fucking doorstep because I just needed to be close to you and find out what I did wrong…and now you tell me it was Weasley’s fault? And you expect me to believe that?”
“You don’t?”
I look at him in disbelief, then scramble out of bed, taking the sheets with me. “No, I don’t! Would you?”
“Well…maybe not…”
“Exactly!” I run a hand through my hair and sigh. “Harry, this isn’t fair…”
“I know, but…Just wait a moment.” He turns to rifle through his bedside drawer, giving me quite a nice view of his back and…other things. I turn away until I feel him looking at me. “Draco, I was going to give this to you…the night Ron tricked me into leaving you. I don’t want to live one day without you, and I want it to be sort of…official.”
Tears are welling up in my eyes as I stare down at the golden ring in his hand. It might be engraved, and knowing him it is, but I can’t see from this distance.
“Harry…”
“I want to marry you, Draco. I want to be with you forever.” He smiles up at me, and I’m so, so tempted to take the ring, then take him. But…
“Harry…” a tear slips down my cheek. “Harry, that’s so…” I fall into bed with him, and wrap him in my arms. My tears are sliding down his neck. “When you left, the pain in my chest was worse than when you used the Sectumsepra on me. It was more like my heart was being shredded than sliced, and it hurt so bad, Harry. I could hardly breathe, and when I did all I smelled was you. I swear you killed me Harry, I do.”
“I’m so sorry, I promise it won’t ever happen again…” he kisses my cheek and I have to pull away.
“I know it won’t.” I stand again, and bundle up the blankets on the bed beside him. “It won’t, because I won’t let it. I can’t marry you Harry.”
“What? Why?”
“I can’t even be with you…” I break off and hold onto myself, wishing it was his arms around me instead of my own. He was so close, and yet… “I’m sorry. This is over. It hurts, and I know it’s such a bad idea…but I can’t do it Harry. I can’t be without you, but I can’t be with you either.”
“Draco, no…”
I lean over the bed and press a kiss to his lips—the feeling is electric and I know we’ll both be burned.
“I love you, Harry.”
“I love you, Draco, don’t leave, please…”
“I’m sorry.”
Without you…
Without you…
Without you…
The wind is blowing across my face and drying the tears. Maybe I can’t live without him, but maybe I can. Only time can tell.
A/N: I want to thank ruinthiell/thindiell (She has 2 pen names) I love her lots cus she beta's super fast and she lets me beta alot of her stuff. She helped me alot with the end of this. I know it's sad, I had a happy ending at first, but she made me change it. Anyhow, if I get 10 reviews asking for the happy I'll post it. I know, I hate it when ppl do it too, but it takes me alot of time! And if there's enough interest in that then I'll continue it. That's all for now!
*loves* -Draca
Without You,
The Ground Thaws,
The Rain Falls,
The Grass Grows.
I wake, the bed is oddly cold. It’s been like that for almost a week now. He left me. On the last day of winter, the man I thought—no, knew I’d love forever just up and left. He wasn’t happy, I was smothering, I wasn’t what he needed. I’m not what he wants. I have to tear myself from the huge bed made for two, the one that just seems too sad for one person, and wrap myself in the sheets that still smell of him to walk over to the balcony doors and step outside. The snow is almost gone. It’s raining, but I don’t really notice. I throw the sheets back into the warm room to prevent the scent from being lost and flop down into one of the chairs we had shared so many memories in, just feeling the raindrops hit my naked body and it feels so good on my closed eyelids.
Without You,
The Seeds Root,
The Flowers Bloom,
The Children Play,
I reopen my eyes when I hear the squeal of a child. No, it must have been my imagination—living alone in the far country can do that to you. I sigh and remember our plans to have children. Not soon, but eventually. I see the pot of dirt that last summer held colourful blooms of all shapes and sizes—He loved to garden. A few small green sprouts are starting to push through.
The Stars Gleam,
The Eagles Fly,
Without You,
The sun is setting. How long have I been out here, I wonder. All day, but the broken heart is something that can not be rushed into healing. I see a faint star and wish with all my fading heart that he will come back to me. He was my star, my rock, my strength, my hope, my lover, my…everything. God, why did he have to be such a pompous asshole?
The Earth Turns,
The Sun Burns,
But I Die,
Without You.
I feel like I’m fading, lying on the floor of the balcony. The sun is up again and blinding me, but I’m still out here. I must be dehydrated because my skin is burning steadily to a crisp but I can’t seem to move. I need help, I call out, but no one comes. Why did he do this?
Without You
The Breeze Warms
The Girls Smile
The Cloud Moves
I’m back in bed. How did that happen? The sheets are fresh. One of the house elves must have changed them. The balcony doors are open and an unusually warm March breeze blows through my bedroom. I can see the clouds drifting by in the sky. I wish I was one of them, able to move on without effort.
Without You
The Tides Change
The Oceans Crash
I think I can hear the ocean from my bed. The house elves have brought me lunch, but I don’t want it. I just drink the tea they’ve made for me to not dehydrate again. But even that seems like a chore. I miss him. Where is he?
The Crowd Roars
The Days Soar
The Babies Cry
Without You
It’s been another week. I somehow managed to get dressed and walk to the park. Why do I do this to myself? All I see is happy people everywhere. People kissing, people cuddling, people with their giggling children. All of this could have been mine! It should have been!
The Moon Glows
The River Flows
But I Die
Without You
I’m lying on the riverbank in the park now. I can hear the water rushing on past me like so many of my friends have. He was the only one to see and know the real me. And he’s gone. I feel like I’m dying, but no, death would have been easier.
The World Revives,
Colors Renew,
But I Know Blue,
Only Blue,
Lonely Blue,
Within Me, Blue,
Without You.
I stupidly go to your house to see you. I need you back. I can’t live without you. I need to feel your touch, share the same breath, and be mine, only mine.
Without You
The Hand Gropes
The Ear Hears
The Pulse Beats
You’re not home…or so the house elf says before slamming the door in my face. I claw and beat at the door for…I’m not sure how long. I finally wear myself out and just slump over onto the welcome mat and lean against the door. Tears finally start to stream down my face. All I can hear is the blood pounding through my ears and my shallow breathing. I cry until I can’t anymore, and fall asleep on your door step.
***
Without You
The Eyes Gaze
The Legs Walk
The Lungs Breathe
He made me betray you. How the hell Ron slipped me that Imperious potion I’ll never know, but when I find him again he will wish for death before he ever thinks of doing such a thing again. I need you back in my arms. I need to feel your lips on mine, and I need you in my arms when I sleep. I know I’ve fucked up big time, but it wasn’t me! I decide to apparate away from my house and into the village near your manor. I see a flower cart along the way and buy the biggest bouquet of the most fragrant and reddest roses I’ve ever seen. I practically run to your gates, only to be informed by the house elf that you’ve been gone for almost 3 days, and the last time they saw you, you were headed to the park. Fuck again.
The Mind Churns
The Heart Yearns
The Tears Dry
Without You
I run through the park yelling for you, screaming until I can barely speak anymore. I finally just flop down on a bench after searching the whole park and start to cry. I don’t care who sees me, the savior of the whole fucking wizarding world bawling my eyes out. Let them stare, I’m used to it. When I can’t cry anymore, when I feel the tears dry, I decide to see if you came back to the manor yet—the place that used to be our home. Once again the house elf says you are away. I walk for about two hours, until I realize I’m lost and apparate home.
Life Goes On
But I'm Gone
Cause I Die
As I walk up the front path I realize that by some trick of fate you’re asleep on my front mat. I run up to you and fall to my knees desperate to touch you. I don’t want to wake you; you look so peaceful, but I can see the bags under your eyes. Instead I lift you carefully and carry you into my room, then crawl into bed with you, pulling you as close as humanly possible.
Without You
***
Without You
I have a dream that I’m in your arms, so warm and safe…please God, please; let it be real this time…
***
Without You
The sun is in my eyes, and when I try to roll over I realize that there’s someone else in my bed. But this isn’t my bed, it’s Harry’s. How the hell did this happen? Harry is still asleep, clinging to my body in a desperate way. I wake him.
“Harry? Wake up. How the hell did I get here?”
“Draco! I…oh, my god, I missedyou andRonputmeonaninfluencepotioncushestillhatesyou, andwantedtobreakusup, andIloveyouandneverwantedanyofthistohappen, andpleaseforgivemeit’llneverhappeneveragainand…IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou…”
“Woah…slow down, use some sentence structure, for fuck’s sake. Start from the beginning, please. Why did you leave? I was so hurt, you bastard, don’t you realize that? I didn’t leave the house for more than two weeks! You have some explaining to do Potter, coherent explaining!” Yes, I had reverted to last names.
“I went to lunch with Ron, you remember? Well he must have slipped me something because the next thing I know I think it’s a great idea to leave you and move back into my house. I was convinced of this until yesterday when I woke up and found that I was here instead of with you. And I can’t live without you Draco, and you know it. I can’t believe I was stupid enough to let Ron drug me like that and hurt us both so badly…please forgive me, I can’t go on without you.”
“I missed you too, Harry. Isn’t that obvious? I slept on your fucking doorstep because I just needed to be close to you and find out what I did wrong…and now you tell me it was Weasley’s fault? And you expect me to believe that?”
“You don’t?”
I look at him in disbelief, then scramble out of bed, taking the sheets with me. “No, I don’t! Would you?”
“Well…maybe not…”
“Exactly!” I run a hand through my hair and sigh. “Harry, this isn’t fair…”
“I know, but…Just wait a moment.” He turns to rifle through his bedside drawer, giving me quite a nice view of his back and…other things. I turn away until I feel him looking at me. “Draco, I was going to give this to you…the night Ron tricked me into leaving you. I don’t want to live one day without you, and I want it to be sort of…official.”
Tears are welling up in my eyes as I stare down at the golden ring in his hand. It might be engraved, and knowing him it is, but I can’t see from this distance.
“Harry…”
“I want to marry you, Draco. I want to be with you forever.” He smiles up at me, and I’m so, so tempted to take the ring, then take him. But…
“Harry…” a tear slips down my cheek. “Harry, that’s so…” I fall into bed with him, and wrap him in my arms. My tears are sliding down his neck. “When you left, the pain in my chest was worse than when you used the Sectumsepra on me. It was more like my heart was being shredded than sliced, and it hurt so bad, Harry. I could hardly breathe, and when I did all I smelled was you. I swear you killed me Harry, I do.”
“I’m so sorry, I promise it won’t ever happen again…” he kisses my cheek and I have to pull away.
“I know it won’t.” I stand again, and bundle up the blankets on the bed beside him. “It won’t, because I won’t let it. I can’t marry you Harry.”
“What? Why?”
“I can’t even be with you…” I break off and hold onto myself, wishing it was his arms around me instead of my own. He was so close, and yet… “I’m sorry. This is over. It hurts, and I know it’s such a bad idea…but I can’t do it Harry. I can’t be without you, but I can’t be with you either.”
“Draco, no…”
I lean over the bed and press a kiss to his lips—the feeling is electric and I know we’ll both be burned.
“I love you, Harry.”
“I love you, Draco, don’t leave, please…”
“I’m sorry.”
Without you…
Without you…
Without you…
The wind is blowing across my face and drying the tears. Maybe I can’t live without him, but maybe I can. Only time can tell.
A/N: I want to thank ruinthiell/thindiell (She has 2 pen names) I love her lots cus she beta's super fast and she lets me beta alot of her stuff. She helped me alot with the end of this. I know it's sad, I had a happy ending at first, but she made me change it. Anyhow, if I get 10 reviews asking for the happy I'll post it. I know, I hate it when ppl do it too, but it takes me alot of time! And if there's enough interest in that then I'll continue it. That's all for now!
*loves* -Draca