Hermione's Final Year

Title: Hermione‘s last year.
Author: Wickedswanz
Disclaimer: Don’t own them.
Rating: N17
Summary: A cute little game of Dare between rivals makes Hermione’s last year at Hogwarts unforgettable.
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Draco and Hermione downed their fire-whisky shots and both shuddered as the burning liquid slid down their throats. After it had been announced that both she and Draco were to be Head boy and Girl at Hogwarts in their seventh year, Sirius had decided to throw a party to celebrate.

The party was swinging and everyone managed to have just a little too much to drink until only five of them sat around the small table talking and joking and having too much fun to call it a night. Sirius slapped the table and laughed as he watched the two heads shudder and swallow another shot. Remus was glaring at him but had to smile when Hermione shook her head with her eyes closed and tongue out.

It was Snape’s turn and the corner of his mouth turned up slightly as he to enjoyed the alcoholic buzz. “I have never changed into an animal.”

Both Remus and Sirius rolled their eyes and took a drink.

“Oh how creative Snape.” Sirius snarked and put his glass back on the table and watched it refill. “I’ve never used a time-turner.” He grinned and watched as Hermione swallowed another shot and shuddered. “She is so cute when she does that.” He leaned closer to speak into her ear, “Sure you don‘t want to turn in now my little girly swot?”

Hermione shook her head and poked her tongue at Sirius. “I’ll have you know that I’m very proud to be a swot. I’ve worked long and hard to become so.” Malfoy sniggered and she raised a single eyebrow at him. “I’ve never been a ferret.”

He glared at her and downed his shot.

“I’m not a virgin.” He sneered vindictively at her but his expression changed at her lack of reaction.

A slow smile spread over her lips as she watched Malfoy’s eyes widen. “Oh come on it’s not that shocking.” she grinned as she felt three other pairs of eyes on her as well. She looked around at them, “What? When have you known me not to do the extra curricular?”

Sirius dropped his head to the table, his shoulders jumping. Malfoy’s head tipped back as he laughed with real mirth, very different to the usual cruel sarcastic chuckles he usually did.

She looked up at Remus to see him grinning back at her, “So professor,” she held up her glass. “What have you never done?”

Remus thought for a moment the smiled and looked over at Sirius, “I’ve never fallen in love with my best friend’s girl.”

Sirius pulled a face and swallowed his shot. Both Remus and Hermione collapsed in laughter, Hermione wiping tears away as she patted Sirius’ arm.

“I knew it! Lily right?” She smiled at him and he had to grin back.

“Smart ass.” he mumbled but the corner of his lips turned up and his eyes glittered as he looked at her.

“Insufferable know-it-all, I believe is what you’re looking for.” Snape pitched in and earned a glare from both Remus and Sirius. Malfoy and Hermione merely sniggered and smiled knowingly at each other. Snape had very little imagination.

The drinking game continued pausing occasionally for more fits of laughter and stories of explanation. Malfoy slammed his hand on the table in a fruitless attempt at controlling his shuddering at something Hermione had said.

“Granger…” he had to stop to calm his breathing again, “That’s the most disgusting thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Hey! I didn’t do it.” She looked indignant but broke into a smile again.

Sirius shook his head. “Doesn’t matter…You told so that makes you to blame.”

“That’s hardly fair.”

“Yes it is.” Remus nodded and hit his head on the table as his shoulders shook.

The mood calmed a little and Hermione noticed Sirius looking at her curiously, his head tipped slightly to the side. She grinned and raised a single eyebrow in invitation of the question he was dying to ask.

“Harry or Ron?” Sirius asked with a sly grin.

“Harry or Ron what?” she asked in a tone that let him know she knew exactly what he was asking.

“Oh god,” Snape interrupted, “Please tell me it wasn’t Potter.”

“Ew no!” Hermione cringed

“Oi! That’s my Godson you’re talking about.” Sirius yelled and glared at her.

“You shag him then.” Hermione snipped and winked at the laughing Malfoy. “Anyway I’m not telling, it’s between him and me.” She held up her hand as Sirius went to say something else, “No it was definitely, not Ron either. Trust me, being pawed by a hormone driven teenage boy is about half as exciting as it sounds.”

Malfoy sniggered and leaned towards Snape, “Ten to one it was someone from our house.”

“No! Do you actually think I’d let one of those slimy gits touch me?” Hermione made a disgusted face.

Remus grinned, “I don’t think they’re going to let up Hermione.”

“He’s right you know.” Malfoy grinned, “If you don’t tell I’m going to assume it was Goyle.”

Hermione compressed her lips and glared across the table at him. “Fine.” She gritted out, “But you have to tell me yours first.”

Malfoy thought for a moment then nodded, “Deal. Tonks.”

Hermione’s mouth hung open for a moment before she dropped her head to the table in a fit of giggles. “Oh my god…Tonks?”

“What’s wrong with that?” Malfoy’s eyes sharpened.

“Isn’t she your cousin?” She managed to choke out. She laughed again even harder. “You purebloods…Gotta keep that blood good and clean right? Freud would have had a field day with you lot.”

“Yeah yeah Granger, you just don’t understand breeding.” Malfoy muttered still glaring at her. “Who the hell is Freud anyway?”

Her grin widened, “He’s a muggle psychiatrist who decided that since he wanted to shag his mother so did everyone else.”

Remus suddenly clicked his fingers and grabbed Sirius, “That was the joke! Lily’s joke remember?”

Sirius was looking strangely at Hermione and slowly started to nod. “Sounds like a case for Dr Freud.”

Hermione smiled and shrugged, “Well you know what they say about great minds.” She stood up and clapped her hands once. “Well I guess it’s time to call it a night.” She spoke brightly and almost made it away from the table.

“Granger.” Both Malfoy and Snape spoke together.

“Yes?” She spoke, her face all innocence.

Malfoy leaned across the table. “If you don’t spill I will tell everyone that you me and Tonks were in a threesome together.”

Hermione leaned closer, “I’ll say you cried afterwards and confessed that only muggleborns could satisfy you”

“Ooh you’re good.” he grinned evilly. “I’ll tell them that you screamed Professor Snape’s name when you came.”

“Malfoy.” Snape’s voice was dangerously low but they both ignored him.

“You bastard.” Hermione glared at her rival and his grin widened, “Like you could make me scream anyone’s name.”

“Wanna find out?” Malfoy leaned closer and his eyes darkened.

Both Sirius and Remus looked from one to the other, not liking where the conversation was going.

Hermione grinned and shook her head then held up her hand in surrender and sat back down. She held up a finger at a time as she spoke, “Last year - 18th birthday - Charlie Weasley.”

“That’s impossible Granger. You’re 17 this year just like me. How could you be 18 last year?”

“I had to use a Time-turner in my 3rd year to complete all the classes that I’d enrolled in and do all the homework, and tutor Harry and Ron, Helping Hagred to clear Buckbeak, Covering for Remus, smuggling out Sirius.” She shrugged, “Then I took a little me time here and there so I wouldn’t lose my mind.” She took a deep breath and sighed, “That was a long year.”

“Wow.” Malfoy looked gobsmacked. “You‘re kind of cool.” he shrugged, “For a muggleborn.”

Hermione smiled and shrugged, “I have my moments.”

It was at this moment that Sirius decided to break up the little moment, “So how was the sex?”

Both Hermione and Draco glared a him.

Hermione stood and bowed her head slightly towards Remus and Snape. “Professors.” She looked at the rather sullen looking Sirius and had to smile and tipped her head to him as well. “Casanova.” She chuckled and looked at Draco. “Goodnight Draco, I had fun tonight.”

He smiled at her use of his name. “Goodnight Hermione.”

~*~

The next morning Hermione awoke with a splitting headache. Keeping her eyes firmly closed she stumbled out of bed and felt her way to the door and down the stairs to the kitchen and sat on the table, since she was unable to find a chair. One at a time she opened her eyes to see Harry and Ron looking at her as though she had two heads. As she carefully turned her head she noticed Sirius sitting at the end of the table and Draco making coffee.

She looked back at Harry and Ron, “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

Their eyes lowered over her and she looked down at herself to see she was still wearing the white slip that she liked to sleep in.

“Hermione…” Ron was the first to speak but couldn’t seem to get past her name. So Harry took over.

“You’re all girly.” His cheeks flushed as his eyes moved over her curvaceous womanly form.

“Wow you think?” Hermione returned sarcastically, “Considering I am a girly? Honestly you two, we have been friends for over 6 years and you have only just realized now that I’m a female.” She groaned and lay back on the table as her head throbbed. “How the hell is it that I’m in a house full of men and yet I’m the only one who knows about my lack of a penis.” She bluntly ignored Sirius’ snort of laughter.

Draco sat up on the table next to her and slapped her leg, “Well I noticed, remember last year I offered you my 10 inches?”

Hermione coughed and covered her face as she felt laughter bubbling up. “Ow it hurts to laugh. That’s disgusting Ferret boy and anyway I don’t believe you have 10 inches to offer. The only one I think could come close would be Severus and he hates me so I won’t be finding out any time soon.” She laughed again and cried in pain as her head throbbed.

“Miss Granger this is not appropriate behaviour for a head girl.” Snape’s deep voice invaded her mind.

She grinned and chuckled, “Oh Severus your timing is impeccable as always. Please, my head is throbbing and everything hurts so take those excitingly large hands and pour me some of that hangover potion I know you made.”

“Miss Granger!”

“Severus please! You have a whole year in which to torture and torment me, just this once behave like a human being and ease my pain.” She sat up as she spoke and found herself looking straight at his black clad chest.

Before she could say more he shoved a glass of foul smelling liquid under her nose. She took the glass with a muttered thank you and drank the contents quickly. She blinked once, twice and her head cleared. Oh Shit.

“You bastards, how dare you force me to come down here in my underwear to beg Professor Snape for the potion, when you could have brought it up to me. You knew I’d be hung over.” She jumped off the table and marched out of the room with as much dignity as she could muster. Her hips swaying seductively under the white slip.

Sirius was the first to speak, “You know she’s adorable when she’s angry.”

Draco sniggered, “I bet she shags like a minx.”

“I heard that.” Her voice floated from upstairs and her door slammed.