Clarity

> Feedback: Yes. On list or orlybsgurl121385@aol.com
>Disclaimer: Okay if I own either the characters or the song then I don’t think I would be writing fanfics for squat.
>AN: The snippet of song is from the latest CD from 30 Seconds to Mars (Beautiful Lie. GO OUT AND GET IT!!!!!!!!!!). I love them and on first hear i thought this was a perfect song to describe what Harry goes through in his mind and in wanting to be normal. Hope you like it!!!

In a dimly lit smoky bar in London sat a half pissed off his ass Draco Malfoy enjoying his normal seat at the very back dark corner to indulge in his favorite hobby, think about the past even thought he didn’t like it. The final battle had destroyed him. Everyone he knew and loved had either died or wasn’t able to be found. Namely a one mister Harry Potter. His lover, the one he thought he would spend the rest of his life with. They said when he finally killed Voldemort ( or as he
like to reefer to him as the bastard ) he just simply disappeared. Like he completely fell off the chart or under the radar. They said that after the war there would be peace and justice for all who live in it. “What a crock of shit that was.” He snorted. Within 24 hours after old Voldies death he had been brought to trial for ‘Harboring a fugitive’ , even though he had been openly working for the side of the light since his sixth year. Plus the only person who knew for sure if his father was a Death Eater or a spy was Dumbledore, and he was dead. He sure ass hell wasn’t going to tell anyone else least of all him. If it wasn’t for Mr. Weasley he would be rotting
away in some cell on the verge of going completely insane.
After the trial was over Draco gathered up some money and set off to find ‘ The Boy Who Lived to irk the hell out of him’ . He went everywhere Asia, North and South America, Even the north pole, but sadly nothing. After two years of looking for him Draco finally gave up and dropped off the radar himself. Gone were his long platinum blond locks, replaced by a short, brown almost black cut. He called it the little spiky mohawk thing. Most of the young muggle boys had it and he
wanted to blend in. He had a little flat on the bad side of London to insuer that no one would find him. He still did magic here and there, nothing to drastic, just the dishes and the wash. Everything else was up to him. Before he left he cleaned out
all of his Gringott volts and was living off of them now. Gone were the thoughts of finding Harry and living a peaceful life together. He quite enjoyed being alone and somewhat independent. When that little twinge of loneliness, and heart ache would
strike up he would always come here to drown his sorrows. He was now twenty-one and could get as pissy drunk as he wanted, plus it didn’t hurt to be able to use he hangover charm on himself in the morning.
He looked around the bar tonight and noticed that it was a lot more crowded han it usually was on a Thursday night. Women were sparsely clothed as they all sat near the performance stage and waited. There must have been a band playing tonight. He hated these nights. The loud drowning guitar rifts would kill his buzz and inevitably cause him to leave in a fouler mood than what he came in with. He got up to make his way out of the club to save himself the trouble of the irritation when he heard a voice he thought he would never hear again.


“Hullo, I’m Liam Evans, We’re Livs and this is whatever you make of it.”

Draco almost fell over the chair that seemed to have park itself in front of him. He pulled it out and sat down on it. The voice belong to none other than Harry James Potter. The Man he had spent 2 official 3 unofficial years looking for. He stood on stage wearing a tight navy blue T-shirt and a pair of what looked like girl lowrider jeans and dirty Chuck Taylors. He was still skinny, and had to be about 6”2”. His hair was still shaggy but longer, almost to his shoulders. His right arm seemed to be
covered in what looked like tattoos and he had a bunch of black bracelets on the left on. His had black finger nail polish on his fingers and black eye liner making the green gaze that wasn’t obstructed by over sized glasses stand out against his olive complexion. The electric green gaze of Harry Potter scanned the room and landed on his lilth form. Draco’s body tensed with anticipation. He didn’t know whether of not he was going to jet of jump into the audience and kick is ass so everyone could see, But nothing happened. He cued up the band and they started playing.


What if I wanted to BREAK.
Laugh it all off in you face,
What would you do?
Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh.
What if I fell to the floor,
Couldn’t take this anymore.
What would you do, do, do ?


Come Break me down!
Bury me, bury me!
I am finished with you!

What if I wanted to fight.
Beg for the Rest of my life.
What would you do, do, do.
You say you wanted more,
What are you waiting for,
I’m not running from you, from you.

Come break me down!
Bury me, Bury me,
I am finished with you!
Look at my eyes!
Your killing me, Killing me
All I wanted was you.


Harry’s gaze never moved from Draco through out the entire song. He
wanted Draco to get the meaning and he got it. Draco felt every word of the song and he was struck dumb. Harry had been hiding his real self the whole time he knew him. They weren’t comrades, Brothers in arms. Harry had feelings for him, but he
had to hide them to be the person he thought everyone wanted him to be. Dracos heart dropped to the floor, as he watched the rest of Harry’s performance. He was going to meet up with him after the show and discuss this new development.

At the end of the show Draco made his way back stage to catch at least a final glimpse of Harry before he left. When he got back stage it was crowded with anxious young girls waiting for the band to emerge from the dressing room. He hallway erupted with screams when they finally did. Draco easily looked over the crowd of girls and found who he had been looking for. Harry walked out with a pair
of oversized sunglasses and the flashes of the girls cameras went off. He looked so cool and calm like a real muggle rock star. He gracefully walked by all the girls and
stopped in front of Draco, Reaching out his hand and grabbing the front of his white polo shirt and practically dragged him out to his muggle Volkswagen. When seated and strapped in Harry started the car and took off. Leaving skid marks in his dusk.

Draco tensed in his seat and stared at Rock Star Harry. He had to be going at least 20 miles above the speed limit. and looked as if he could give a damn in the world. Harry looked over at Draco and winked though his black tinted sunglasses.
Draco found it peculiar that Harry would be wearing sunglasses and 3:15 in the morning, but brushed it off leaving it to him being so damn cool. They stopped in front of an apartment building and Harry got out, Walking to the other side opened the door, and yanked Draco out by his caller again. They walked inside the building
and up a couple of flights of stairs and finally into what must have been his flat. Harry unlocked it and shoved him in without a moments hesitation. Draco laid on the floor fearing his life as Harry walked passed him flicking on lights as he went.

“So d’you like the show.” Harry asked in a very nonchalant way, kind of like they had not been separated for 31/2 years . Draco picked himself up off the floor and dusted off his jeans. “ Yeah, I particularly liked the first song.” He reached up and ran his fingers through his dark hair. Harry had made it to the little kitchen and was looking into the fridge when Draco announced this, causing him to look up with a smirk that could rival the best Malfoy. Harry closed the door and stocked over to Draco and got right in his face. “Good cause that one was for you.” Draco smirked
at him and knodded. “ Of course it was. It had me written all over it.” With that said Harry’s smirk widened into a real smile, while Draco’s eyes sparkled with pure satisfaction. Harry stepped back and smiled “ Still full of yourself I see.” Draco rolled his eyes and muttered. “Don’t I know it.” Harry shook his head, but didn’t
say anything turned and walked back to the kitchen. He wasn’t alone though.

Draco was walking right behind him. Uncontously trying to make sure he wouldn’t get away again. “Okay I’ve given you something, What have you got for
me?” Harry ruffled Draco’s hair and tuned back to the fridge garbing a soda out of it . “ Nothing really, I wasn’t expecting to ever see you again.” Draco said the last part barley above a whisper. Harry turned to smiling at him, but it ever reached his eyes. Harry knew that it was wrong to just up and leave like that, but he had to get away. It was just too much to handle not having the burden of Voldemort on his
shoulders. Voldemort defined who he was, but with him dead and gone, he didn’t know who he was. He just needed some time to think, and then he was going to come right back, but then the music thing started taking off and his little suprise he
wasn’t expecting. His return was put on the back burner. He walked over to Draco and slowly put his arms around his waist pulling him into a hug. He didn’t know How to tell Draco about the gift he unknowingly left with, but now wasn’t the time
to bring that up.

Draco slowly wrapped his arms around Harry’s neck and squeezed back. He inhaled and took in a deep whiff of Harry. Mum just as he remembered. He smelled fresh, and clean, and strong. Like he could take on the world and win, and know that
he thought about it he did. He had never felt as safe as he did in his arms. There was just something about him that made life worth living.

Harry pulled away and looked Draco in the eyes. Draco kept looking back and forth from Harry’s lips to his eyes. Harry knew what he wanted because he wanted it too, but it was going to have to wait alittle longer. “ Whats with the new look?” Draco finally focused on his eyes on Harry’s and smiled. “Had to change if I was going to blend in. I’ve been living in the muggle world for 3 1/2 years now looking for you.” Harry gave him a sad smile and ran his fingers through his new do. “You didn’t have to do that, I was going to come back.” Draco’s smile faltered at this and shook his head. “No Harry you were right to leave when you did. I just wish you would have told me, I would have left with you.” Harry looked alittle confused by this, but didn’t press him on it any further. “Whats with the name change?” Draco asked Harry smiled at this and rolled his eyes. “I guess I wanted to see how it felt to be someone else, and what better way to do that than to reinvent myself completely.” “And become a musician?” Draco asked with a smile on his
face. Harry knodded his head and allowed himself to laugh alittle. If only he knew what else caused the change he wouldn’t be so smiley.

They both got quiet for a while and just held each other. Then Harry broke the silence. “I really was going to go back. Things just got sort of complicated and I didn’t want a lot of publicity about it.” Draco nuzzled Harry’s cheek. “I know, but
after hearing your song I completely understand.” Harry smiled and pulled his face back . ‘Not really’ Harry thought. “ Did you really like it?” It was Draco’s turn to chuckle “Of course I did love. It was the best thing I’ve ever heard.” Harry was
smug like a child who was just praised for doing a good job, and Draco couldn’t help but to laugh. He was so adorable like that. He just wanted to eat him up. Draco
stopped laughing at that thought and looked into Harry’s blazing green eyes. His thoughts drifted back to his earlier thought of kissing and thats what happened. He grabbed Harry’s face and locked his lips on to his. Harry moaned into the kiss and
moved closer. They stood there in the kitchen kissing for a while, until the lak of oxygen alarms went off in their heads.
They pulled apart and smiled. The Dynamic Duo were back and they knew it. “What are we going to do now. Am I gonna be a rock stars wife and sit at home while your away, or what?” Just then the front door opened and a young woman with cocoa skin and curly black hair walked in with a little girl around the age of 3. She had ivory skin, pink lips, coal black ringlets pulled up into a pony tail and stormy turquoise eyes framed by coal black eyelashes. She wore a pair of blue Care Bear pj’s and house shoes. “Daddy I wanted to come home already. I couldn’t wait.”
Harry’s eyes widened in complete shock. ‘Secrets out.’ He pulled away from Draco and went to pick up the little girl and address the lady. Draco was out of commission. Harry had a child by some bird and was now trying to get back with him. He had to think this through.

“Cree, what is she doing up this late?” Harry was shocked to see that his little girl was still up at 4:00 in the morning. Cree looked up at Harry with one eyebrow cocked. “This little rat knew what she was doing sleeping all day, I thought I had it good then around 10 she woke up telling me how we were going drop her off extra early tonight.” Cree looked as if she had been though a hell and Harry had
to sympathize. When his little girl had her mind set on something there was no convincing her other wise. “Sorry Cree.” Cree smiled and patted and kissed the little girls head. “Its okay Audrey, I’ll see you next week.” She looked into the kitchen and saw the shocked Draco and looked back at Harry. “Well I would stay and talk, but it looks like you have your hands full. See ya later.” Harry gave her a little smile. “Yeah, Thanks Cree.” When she walked out and closed the door Harry closed his
eyes in fear. Now he had no choice but to tell Draco of his little secret.

Audry looked over Harry’s shoulder and smiled at Draco. “Hi .” She said quietly. Draco just waved at her. He didn’t know how to take this. There was a whole knew variable in there dynamics. This little girl was going to change everything.

Apon hearing Audrey say something Harry turned around just in time to catch the small wave. Draco looked hurt and confused and he knew he needed an explanation. He walked back into the kitchen a few paces away from Draco. “Draco, there was something else that came up and caused me not to come back sooner.” Before he could finish Draco had his hand up to stop him and was looking
down at the floor. “Don’t Harry, it’s whatever. You got some bird knocked up and now your playing daddy. I have to think about this.” Harry was pissed. He had know idea what he was talking about. “Draco, if you would let me finish, you’ll find out that the out come is very different. This is Audrey, I had her 2 and one half years ago.” He stopped and let that marinate in Draco’s head for a bit, but he didn’t have to.

Draco’s eyes widened in understanding. He had the little girl!? That ment that Harry had somehow gotten pregnant this was.... “Oh.” was all he could get out of his mouth because it was cotton dry. He looked back at the little girl and saw it. Her skin was the same Ivory shade his was and her lips were pushed into a natural pout
like his. This was his little girl! Draco walked over to them near the entrance of the kitchen. He looked Harry in the eyes for a definite answer and he got it by him knodding his head. Draco held out his hands and Harry lifted the little girl off his shoulders and handed her to Draco. “Draco, This is Audrey Love Potter-Malfoy.” Draco held her tiny weight in his hands. He had a little girl with the man he loved. He was in complete bliss, but he still didnt understand. Male pregnacies were rare in there was any. “How.” His dazed exression caused Harry to smile a teary smile. “ I don’t know. The doctor that helped me told me that with the extreme energy that was in the air that day it’s amazing that alot of othere wizards weren’t pregnant, but alot of wizards didnt do the same thing we did the night before either.” Harry winked at Draco, but he didnt see it. He was in a trance rubbing his little girls coal black ringlettes. Harry then realizes that his Audrey may be scared being in another man’s arms besides his own. “Audrey, this is the man I’ve told you about.” Audrey pushed back on Draco to look into is eyes. She looked a bit skeptical. She arched one in adistinct Malfoy way. Harry knew she was thinking about The blond hair he had told her about. Thrie forheads touched as she looked closer and deeper into his eyes. Draco closed his eyes and tooke in her sent. to be 3 she still smelled like a baby. She shook his face alittle to make his open his eyes again and slowly her skeptisisum
faded into a sad little smile. “Where you been Papa? I been looking everywhere for you.” Draco’s heart stung with the sound of her little hurt voice. “I’ve been looking
for you and Daddy.” She smiled and hugged him tight. “Now that you found us are you gonna leave?” Draco looked up at Harry with tears in his eyes holding out his free hand to him.. Harry was crying silently in font of them. He slowly made his way
to them as if not sure Draco was going to turn and run. When he reached him Draco pulled him into a hug and squeezed tight. “No love, I’ll never let you go again.”:)

~END~