Miracle Gro
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
3,209
Reviews:
12
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
3,209
Reviews:
12
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Miracle Gro
beta'd by VL and Alisanne. Thanks, ladies! *kisses*
Disclaimer: Everyone you see here belongs to the lovely lady from Scotland.
A/N: I always chuckle at the speed with which our slash heroes get “excited”. This is my take on what’s going on with them. :D
Loves2Fly:U there?
Buzz!
Buzz!
Buzz!
Buzz!
Potions_Master_Supreme:*sigh* Yes. What do you want?!
Loves2Fly:If Draco comes looking for me, will you distract him? Please?? *bats eyelashes hopefully*
Potions_Master_Supreme:Trouble in paradise, Mr. Potter? *hopeful*
Loves2Fly:No, nothing’s wrong, it’s just…well, I’m sure you don’t really want to know.
Potions_Master_Supreme:I’m certain I will regret asking, but what is wrong?
Loves2Fly:Well, it’s just that he’s always READY, you know? I’ve never seen someone who can go from zero to hard as fast as he does.
Potions_Master_Supreme:Pfft. Everyone can do that now. I don’t know what you’re complaining about.
Loves2Fly:What do you mean, everyone can do that now? I sure as fuck don’t have the stamina he does.
Potions_Master_Supreme:*smirk* Language, Mr. Potter.
Loves2Fly:*rolls eyes* Whatever.
Loves2Fly:U still there?
Loves2Fly:Where’d you go?
Potions_Master_Supreme:I am still here, I am simply waiting for an apology for your atrocious language.
Loves2Fly:Fine, I’m sorry. Now, what did you mean?
Potions_Master_Supreme:About what, Mr. Potter?
Loves2Fly:Oh, funny. Hahaha. Now tell me, please!
Potions_Master_Supreme:One of these days you will learn manners, Mr. Potter.
Loves2Fly:*head desk* Please tell me? Please, oh master of the universe? I’ll clean all your cauldrons by hand if you tell me!
Potions_Master_Supreme:Ha! As if I want you anywhere near my cauldrons. But fine, I’ll tell you if for no other reason than to get you off here so I can work. Miracle Gro, Harry. He’s using Miracle Gro. Most Wizards in a sexual relationship do. I am actually surprised you’ve never heard of it, since it was a Muggle invention.
Loves2Fly:Miracle Gro? What’s that? *confused*
Potions_Master_Supreme:It is a plant care product. How is it you don’t know about it? I know you used to care for the lawn at your relatives’ house.
Loves2Fly:Let’s not mention the Dursleys please, I just ate lunch.
Potions_Master_Supreme:*smirk*
Loves2Fly:Okay, so he’s using something called Miracle Gro. What is it, what does it do, and where can I get some?
Potions_Master_Supreme:For your purposes it is an erection stimulator, as in, it causes you to achieve a state of instant erection whenever you wish. In the Muggle world, they use it to help plants grow. You can buy it at any Muggle lawn care shop.
Loves2Fly:So how do I use it? Do I eat it or something?
Potions_Master_Supreme:No, you imbecile. You follow the directions. Mix a specified amount with water and pour it over the area you wish to “fertilize”.
Loves2Fly:Thanks so much, Severus! I’m going to go out and buy some right now! *hugs*
Potions_Master_Supreme:*pained look* Please don’t call me Severus, you twit. I am Professor Snape to you, now and always.
Loves2Fly:Fine, “Professor Snape.” BTW, were you aware when you signed up for your account that your initials are PMS? ROFLMAO
Potions_Master_Supreme has signed off.
Disclaimer: Everyone you see here belongs to the lovely lady from Scotland.
A/N: I always chuckle at the speed with which our slash heroes get “excited”. This is my take on what’s going on with them. :D
Loves2Fly:U there?
Buzz!
Buzz!
Buzz!
Buzz!
Potions_Master_Supreme:*sigh* Yes. What do you want?!
Loves2Fly:If Draco comes looking for me, will you distract him? Please?? *bats eyelashes hopefully*
Potions_Master_Supreme:Trouble in paradise, Mr. Potter? *hopeful*
Loves2Fly:No, nothing’s wrong, it’s just…well, I’m sure you don’t really want to know.
Potions_Master_Supreme:I’m certain I will regret asking, but what is wrong?
Loves2Fly:Well, it’s just that he’s always READY, you know? I’ve never seen someone who can go from zero to hard as fast as he does.
Potions_Master_Supreme:Pfft. Everyone can do that now. I don’t know what you’re complaining about.
Loves2Fly:What do you mean, everyone can do that now? I sure as fuck don’t have the stamina he does.
Potions_Master_Supreme:*smirk* Language, Mr. Potter.
Loves2Fly:*rolls eyes* Whatever.
Loves2Fly:U still there?
Loves2Fly:Where’d you go?
Potions_Master_Supreme:I am still here, I am simply waiting for an apology for your atrocious language.
Loves2Fly:Fine, I’m sorry. Now, what did you mean?
Potions_Master_Supreme:About what, Mr. Potter?
Loves2Fly:Oh, funny. Hahaha. Now tell me, please!
Potions_Master_Supreme:One of these days you will learn manners, Mr. Potter.
Loves2Fly:*head desk* Please tell me? Please, oh master of the universe? I’ll clean all your cauldrons by hand if you tell me!
Potions_Master_Supreme:Ha! As if I want you anywhere near my cauldrons. But fine, I’ll tell you if for no other reason than to get you off here so I can work. Miracle Gro, Harry. He’s using Miracle Gro. Most Wizards in a sexual relationship do. I am actually surprised you’ve never heard of it, since it was a Muggle invention.
Loves2Fly:Miracle Gro? What’s that? *confused*
Potions_Master_Supreme:It is a plant care product. How is it you don’t know about it? I know you used to care for the lawn at your relatives’ house.
Loves2Fly:Let’s not mention the Dursleys please, I just ate lunch.
Potions_Master_Supreme:*smirk*
Loves2Fly:Okay, so he’s using something called Miracle Gro. What is it, what does it do, and where can I get some?
Potions_Master_Supreme:For your purposes it is an erection stimulator, as in, it causes you to achieve a state of instant erection whenever you wish. In the Muggle world, they use it to help plants grow. You can buy it at any Muggle lawn care shop.
Loves2Fly:So how do I use it? Do I eat it or something?
Potions_Master_Supreme:No, you imbecile. You follow the directions. Mix a specified amount with water and pour it over the area you wish to “fertilize”.
Loves2Fly:Thanks so much, Severus! I’m going to go out and buy some right now! *hugs*
Potions_Master_Supreme:*pained look* Please don’t call me Severus, you twit. I am Professor Snape to you, now and always.
Loves2Fly:Fine, “Professor Snape.” BTW, were you aware when you signed up for your account that your initials are PMS? ROFLMAO
Potions_Master_Supreme has signed off.